• Chinese Cosmonauts Caught Faking SpaceWalk All Underwater

    February 8, 2009 7:36 am 11 comments
  • Share on Tumblr
  • Embarrassment and shame summarize the collective emotion of communist China today, as their attempts at claiming to send cosmonauts to space (for a spacewalk) have been proven false by advanced scientific video review.

    Some of our top scientists discovered that China most likely staged their fake spacewalk, on their fake space trip, underwater…perhaps in the Atlantic Ocean. Let’s look at the expected video evidence:

    Scientific video reveals fake Chinese spacewalk conducted by Chinese NASA.

    Such a national embarrassment for China comes at a very inopportune time, one where the people really needed to be able to build up national moral.

    Put yourself in the place of the poor Chinese for a second. All your life, you hear fairy tales about the great land of America, where capitalism brings an abundance of goods to all and their sciences are so advanced that they sent men to the moon nearly a half-century ago.

    With such thoughts dancing in a young Chinese boy’s head, it only stands to reason that when he grows up he’d want to make his nation as proud, successful and moral as this great Utopian land of America that seems too real to exist.

    But hopes and dreams can be dashed by the cold, hard hands of reality and scrutiny.

    It turns out 2008 was a particularly bad year for our dear friends in China. It all started during the 2008 Olympic games, where China was caught faking the opening ceremony with Photoshop, exploiting too young gymnasts and cheating in several other events. They even went as far as having a child lip-sync their communist national anthem.

    U.S. gymnasts congratulate China's cheating gymnasts Pictures, Images and Photos
    Heroic American gymnasts greeting underage Chinese gymnasts who cheated them out of a gold medal.

    If such embarrassment was not enough, China then had to live with the guilt of harming innocent Americans as toothpaste, toys and even chicken exported from their nation had all sorts of toxins embedded in them.

    After all this, it is safe to say that all of these offenses the Chinese NASA’s moon landing is still the most shameful as it was the most elaborate, expensive and time-consuming deception the Chinese government tried to carry out.

    Despite this fact, having the truth revealed about the fake attempts at science should not be a moment of wallowing for China, but rather a chance at redemption and opportunity.

    The Chinese are a very industrious people of great promise, and once they realize the error of their ways and fully embrace an American lifestyle I’m sure that in a good century’s time they will begin the foundations of a proper country that neatly blends government, morality, religion and science.

    Thanks for rating this! Now tell the world how you feel through social media. .
    How does this post make you feel?
    • Excited
    • Fascinated
    • Amused
    • Shocked
    • Sad
    • Angry
    About The Author
    Amber Amber <3's you and someone else does too!

    Facebook Conversations