• Chinese Invent Giant Firebreathing Robot Armies

    March 31, 2009 10:59 pm 79 comments

    Only weeks ago I warned everyone about the evil hordes of Chinese who will come and kill us all dead with their clone armies and biological weapons!

    People of faith took heart and prayed while the foolish liberals laughed it up, calling the communist Chinese our allies despite their transgressions in World War 2 and crashing our economy.

    Now who’s laughing as shocking video footage from China shows that these atheistic wonders have manged to create giant fire breathing robots!

    I am extremely terrified of Chinese people and again you should be too Don’t let people tell you are racist for feeling this way, because anyone in their right mind fears a gigantic Godless firebreathing robot designed to burn the life out of all things good and moral.

    Friends, the Chinese are engineered to hate American freedoms at birth and there is nothing that would bring joy to their cold hearts more than burning you and your children dead.

    In the last century Asia murdered our grandfathers during a sneak attack at Pearl Harbor and now they will send these robots over to firebomb you and your precious children in your sleep.

    Now some liberals will try to fool you and say the Chinese would never do such things, the thought of burning a human is preposterous. To that I say tell that to the cute little puppy that’s being BBQ’d and eaten alive at your local Mongolian BBQ.

    He’d try to bark a response but his little grilled mouth is too busy swimming in the soy sauce laden bellies of the very people who support making these robots.

    Anyone who has no problems eating puppies will not have making sure you and your loved ones are seared well done by their weapons of mass destruction.

    This finding has put so much fear into my heart that I will not sleep well and you are naturally scared too. Let us look at more of the leaked video so we can become more panicked and have greater incentive to implore our political leaders return the laws of McCarthyism and sign Executive Orders against anyone who may be trying to aide the Chinese build these new WMDs.

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