Zombie Jesus Jokes from Atheists
I hope you all are having a wonderful Resurrection Sunday and good times spent with family and friends. Today’s service at Langley was truly wonderful and it was great to see so many new faces in the congregation, if only for one Sunday out of the year. It tells us that there are plenty more souls to be saved and we must compel them to come back to hear the loving message of Christ, so they may have eternal salvation.
Today I decided to check through the HolyMailbox and wish I could say I was shocked to find that not everyone understands the true meaning of Easter. On a day that’s all about love and grace, there are some whose hearts are attuned to nothing but mischief and disrespect.
Atheists apparently have a joke about “Zombie Jesus”, where they make fun of our Lord and Savior. They make these cartoons comparing him to a walking, talking zombie, which is just plain offensive. Several of them just had to take time out of their day to send us some of these offensive cartoons via email, which usually would be filtered out by our interns had I not checked myself.
I thought I would share some of these with you, so you can see exactly what we’re up against. These people do not want the Holy Word to spread to those who need it most, and will do everything in their power to disrespect our Lord and Savior.
Let’s take a look. There is nothing funny about this and I find it truly hateful.
Warning: Some images contain an amount of gore, offensive words, blasphemy against Christ and violence. Please have children leave the room before reviewing these archived images.
If I were Jesus, in my heart I’d be tempted to personally come down and cast whoever made these lots against me into the Lake of Fire and Brimstone. That’s why everyone on Earth is so lucky and blessed that the Holy Son of God is who he is. Just. Merciful. Holy. Right. And true.
Even as he allowed the Romans and Jewish traitors to crucify him, so we may repent and for the remission of our sins to have eternal life, the Roman and Jewish traitors mocked Jesus. They spat upon him, cast lots, beat him and placed upon his head a crown of thorns.
And as they continued this mockery, as he died for their sins, Jesus looked up to heaven and said:
“Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.”
God, Forgive them; for they know now what they do. Isn’t that wonderful?
And that’s the message I think we need to go to today on Easter. Father, forgive them for they know now what they do.
Not everyone on Earth recognizes the gravity of the spiritual situation we’re dealing with on Earth. As Christians, it is our job to educate those ignorant of the miracle, love and mercy of Christ.
Those who mock do so because either their hearts are already eternally hardened, and God will punish them with an eternal fiery fate, or they just have not been properly given a chance to open their hearts up to Christ.
So even when we come against such blasphemous mocking, we must remember one thing. Ask God to forgive those who would do such things. Ask God to open their hearts and minds, so they may receive his agape love. They know not what they do.
God’s love is eternal, merciful and kind. Peace be with you this Easter, my friends, and remember; love is the key. It is the answer. And God loves everyone, even those who dwell in the midst of sin.
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Jack Gould
Pastor Jack "Jbox" Gould is a local best-selling author, motivational speaker and youth pastor extraordinaire at Langley CC, where his stories about the laid back California life and relations to Jack-in-the-Box bobble heads are all the rage. Email Jack a Question
3:38 pm
This thread has now been claimed in the name of the Overlord.
Your end is near, Christwire. You have been warned.
Praise or Condemn:
21 
0
3:57 pm
TO THE MAKERS OF THE ARTICLE:
Praise or Condemn:
8 
1
4:17 pm
The only true Jesus.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
37 
1
7:22 pm
*kneels to the reptilian holiness*
Praise or Condemn:
18 
0
4:20 pm
GET IN THE VAN.
Praise or Condemn:
12 
0
4:23 pm
You know what this thread truly lacks, dood?
Prinnies.
Praise or Condemn:
7 
0
4:37 pm
WHAT THE HELL.
THE FIRST POST SPECIFICALLY SAID THAT I CLAIMED THIS THREAD AND ALL OF CHRISTWIRE.
SCREW IT. I’M NOT POSTING AS ADAM NELSON ANYMORE.
Praise or Condemn:
7 
0
4:44 pm
[IMG]http://i315.photobucket.com/albums/ll461/StarisBernkastel/UBAOJESUS.png[/IMG]
Enjoy your mindfuck, Chirstfags.
Praise or Condemn:
8 
1
4:53 pm
I CAME.
Praise or Condemn:
6 
0
4:57 pm
… Wait. Did eye miss my (9) get?
Praise or Condemn:
3 
0
5:00 pm
Doesn’t matter. This thread’s about me now.
Praise or Condemn:
3 
0
5:07 pm
Screw you, dood. This thread should be about Prinnies, dood.
Praise or Condemn:
3 
0
5:08 pm
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
Praise or Condemn:
5 
1
5:08 pm
The thread is about Laharl-Sama now…~?
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
5:12 pm
It always has been
WAIT, HOW DID THIS GET HERE. I AM NOT GOOD WITH INTERNET.
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
5:13 pm
Oh, Laharl-Sama~! Hello!
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
5:16 pm
hallo hallo my name is hikari kamiwaklrjflkdjalkf or u may see me as kami (god). because i am. anywhoooo this website is very offending becaus of the way u portray god. u show him as a guy but i am girl. boobage xD. i no im not a guy becuz i have a s**y boyfrend named envy (hes an hoamodlksfjalkdfjaldkfjaf omg)
this article is especially offending because LKFJAIEWRJALKFJALF. so im gonna send my characters (NOT SUES!1!) after u.
envy: whut about me bb D:
me: oh u can 2 darlin
kion: fffffff im gonna keel u guys :icondieplz:
aruko: u baka, kion. this isnt da. there r no plz accounts. isn’t that rite onii-chan?
envy: thats rite. now im gonna rape parsee
parsee: im not tsundere and uke– ahhh *raped*
*sets envy’s face on fire*
envy: im imortel
Praise or Condemn:
8 
0
5:17 pm
This thread is now about me.
Or my bonsai. Take your pick. ;D
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:20 pm
[IMG]http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c270/Shadowofafatalframe/Etna.jpg[/IMG]
Hey bitches! How goes it?
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:21 pm
Errr…I don`t know why I posted this~ 8D;
Isn`t it pretty?
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:29 pm
Awww….that`s sooo mean, Laharl-Sama…;A;
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:30 pm
This thread is now about me.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:31 pm
….Who are you?
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:33 pm
Badass, that’s what.
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
5:35 pm
Badass…?
Laharl-Sama, what`s a “Badass”~? :3
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:35 pm
This is astounding. I feel like the only person on this website who isn’t acting like a 4channer or a Christfag.
By the way, I knew Jesus. Shocking as it may be, he was black.
Praise or Condemn:
9 
0
6:02 pm
Nice obscure movie reference.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
5:48 pm
W-what oAo? There’s nothing on here to eat ;w;
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:52 pm
Looks like some Japonese kids are posting here.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
4
6:02 pm
What on Earth is this? Animes?
Praise or Condemn:
1 
11
1:55 am
You sir are ignorant.
Praise or Condemn:
6 
0
9:23 pm
@who ever asked if this was
“Animes”
Yeah not a word
Praise or Condemn:
4 
0
6:06 pm
Maybe he would come smite us if he was real. But since I’m here typing, I guess he’s not.
Besides, I don’t know what movies YOU’VE watched, but when something comes back from the dead, it’s definitely a zombie. This is just the kind of butthurt I’d expect from Christians.
Praise or Condemn:
9 
1
10:31 am
I was just appalled at the way the “Christians” are saying what they always say. Believe what I do or else. If God was real and created us all in his image then wouldn’t he/ she also have a sense of humor? Also saying that those who mock have a hardened heart and God will punish them with an eternal firey fate? Then turn around and preach about how gracious God is and he forgives all. What a hypocrite.
Praise or Condemn:
4 
0
6:08 pm
Praise or Condemn:
3 
0
6:09 pm
I am Robot, hear me roar
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
7:00 pm
These images are just jokes. I agree that they are disrespectful to Christianity and are in bad taste, but lighten up. The concept of “Zombie Jesus” is actually pretty clever and funny if you ask me.
Praise or Condemn:
6 
0
7:29 pm
Despite all the junk posted in the comments, I was going to write personally to the pastor, but then discarded it when the futility overwhelmed me. He is so blinded by his faith, he so closely identifies with Christianity, he could probably never be asked to engage in critical analysis of his own religion.
Pastor Gould, we don’t respect your religion because it has done nothing to earn it. Centuries of horrible crimes, the hypocrisy, the destruction of indigenous cultures by way of missionaries, and disgusting teachings do not make up for the few random acts of charity here and there.
The truth is, if god were part of this natural world we call reality, then it could be measured, and I would become religious, if deemed necessary by that which we could positively identify as god. Any non believer or Atheist would attest to that. It is not too much to operate explicitly in the domain of logic, reason, and evidence. If god were supernatural, then it cannot, by definition, be known. Any positive clam on your part is thus hypocrisy. I might as well talk to a plumber about truth, as he is just as qualified as you.
You don’t know. You can’t possibly know. And neither can I. But I do know people have and will probably continue to commit atrocities in the name of religion. Even Hitler was a Roman Catholic, and had said in his book, Mein Kampf: “. . . I am convinced that I am acting as the agent of our Creator. By fighting off the Jews, I am doing the Lord’s work.”
I don’t mean this post to be an attack, I mean it to be curt. If you insist to even comment on such matters, I would like to help you do so in as educated manner as possible. You need to understand the motivations behind the people who oppose your religious convictions.
I recommend The God Delusion, by Richard Dawkins. To me the book is rather unremarkable, but to a religious person, it might be considered a hard read, as it questions your every premise. But before you engage in your education, an essay I’ve recommend to everyone I’ve spoken with since I’ve read it is http://www.paulgraham.com/identity.html. Mr. Graham talks about keeping your identity small, so that you can engage in meaningful discussion without being offended. Also, consider that non-Christians may not have the appropriate wordage to communicate with a Christian without being outright offensive. The same goes for you, why do you think there is such junk in the comments section?
Finally, don’t ask your lord to forgive us, we know exactly what we’re doing. Many (though not myself, I can say) were raised Christian. Because of that, if they wanted forgiveness, they either wouldn’t have done it in the first place, or would ask for forgiveness themselves.
Praise or Condemn:
10 
1
7:46 pm
This thread is now about Spongebob
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
9:39 pm
This post assumes Christianity is not asinine.
Praise or Condemn:
5 
0
12:00 am
This is the funniest damn thing I have ever seen.
Hey, you’re the one who believes in a guy who came back from the dead. That’s a zombie by all definitions.
Praise or Condemn:
8 
0
12:18 am
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
1:22 am
I’m loving the Zombie Last Supper. Hadn’t seen that one. Thanks!
Praise or Condemn:
3 
0
4:18 am
I ain’t ‘fraid o’ no ghost!
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
6:36 am
Seriously?
Two-thousand-and-fucking-nine and there are still idiots like you about. Fire-and-brimstone? More like fucking crack-and-pipe, you should lay off the whacky stuff and start seeing sense you damn fool. It’s called science and reasoning. The two can explain quite a bit to the enlightened mind. First though you have to stop being such a dick.
Praise or Condemn:
11 
1
11:04 am
“If I were Jesus, in my heart I’d be tempted to personally come down and cast whoever made these lots against me into the Lake of Fire and Brimstone.”
Amazing how so many religious nut jobs want people to have eternal pain and misery for the most minor offenses. It is ironic how you preach the word of your most divine Zombie savior and yet in reality follow none of his messages and simply spread hate, ignorance and war.
Praise or Condemn:
10 
0
5:54 pm
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
10:08 am
yeah those image are REALLY funny you’re right
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
11:44 am
Good to see The Legion has already left its mark.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
10:44 pm
I just need to ask. If someone tells a joke about say races, something against a certain race, does that mean they are against that race?
If I told a joke about girls being inferior, does that mean It truely believe it?
What if I told a joke about the mass genocide of a population, does that mean I want it to happen?
If I told a joke about Jesus being a zombie, does that mean I believe its true?
You can be a part of something and still joke about it, its not like making a joke about christianity immediatly erases your name in “The Book of Life” by 11th century jews, er. I mean God.
I mean just because your a christian doesn’t mean your God. I mean if you were God you’d be all-knowing, then you could see your paradoxial fallicies.
God Bless
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
12:35 pm
Okay, so let me try to get this straight. People send you emails with pictures, which are truly hilarious in my opinion, and you find them hateful? I’m guessing that you also think that all other religions need to convert to christianity? I’ve seen multiple posters and other assorted things that are funny, and they contain Christianity, Judaism, Atheism, Satanism, all different sorts of religions. Learn to take a joke dude, because its not worth getting worked up over. Btw, yes, I’m christian.
So you can’t try to say I’m atheist and don’t understand your POV.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
3:40 pm
Hey thanks for the zombie jesus pics, I didn’t have them all.
Also, BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS
Praise or Condemn:
5 
0
1:14 pm
(Oh hay, this article’s on Most Delivered. 8D
JUST AS KEIKAKU’D.)
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
4:25 pm
Why does a Christian look at zombie Jesus as offensive while I, as a member of the undead, find it funny. The only offensive thing is grouping a holy man with us. The holy NEVER come back after death.
Praise or Condemn:
4 
0
3:09 am
Like to watch Stargate Atlantis episodes and also Lost. I found your blog on google and read a few of your other posts. I just added you to my Google News Reader. Look forward to reading more from you in the future.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
2
8:50 pm
you know, normally i would scoff and dismiss this site and all it says about democrates, asians, and the 44th president and whatnot, but here, no. here i actually found some good. your a holy man who can’t find any humor in these jokes, but instead of preach hate, you really went back to the only real message of jesus that is worth following: forgive them for they know not what they do. i’m very impressed that you dailed back on the hate since i know just the sight of these things makes you have a unforgiveable-like anger, but you really did the right thing, and you even asked others to follow your example. I thank you.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
3
3:40 am
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
7:51 pm
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
4:57 pm
God loves us all, yet he is the most petty devine being I have ever heard of. If God existed he would be the biggest douchebag in existence. If you don’t do as he says you’ll be tortured forever. Because of something that TWO people did once all of earth is punished forever through hereditary sin. He created some people to be better then other, the Jews, it’s in the Old Testament so it’s part of christianity too. Even if you live obeying the ten commandments but just don’t BELIEVE in God and Jesus you go to hell.
Not to mention all the sick stuff in the old testament, about how to sell your daughter and how slavery is okay if you do it the right way (This does not include treating you slaves nice or anything, just a lot of rules about how to punish them or how much to pay the owner if you hurt another mans slave)
By the way, God has a plan for every life on earth and he knows everything that happens, he is perfect in every way. Yet you pray to him… Why? If he wants someone to die, they die. There is nothing to pray for, it’s already planned out…
Now that lightning and earthquakes can be explained scientifically, there are no more signs of Gods existence.
And what kind of an evil being would create a garden full of wonder, and one more apple tree. Then say “Don’t touch this one” was it to test humans? Why would he do that? And before they ate from the tree of knowledge, Adam and Eve had no way of knowing right from wrong, all they had was the voice of God, and later Satan. So punishing them for eating the apple is like hitting an infant for wanting alcohol.
Satan wanted humans to have as much knowledge as possible, so that they could choose how to lead their own lives. God didn’t want the people to have free will so he threw satan out of heaven…
The more I learn about christianity, the more I think of Hitler and other dictators. Your God is an asshole and he apparently hates us all. Trying to please him is like a black man wanting to join the KKK
Praise or Condemn:
8 
1
9:38 am
Now just popping in here…
if those are from atheists….. it proves they have sense of humor…
I approve this humor
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
5:52 pm
KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS KAWORU DIED FOR YOURS SINS
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
1:52 pm
LOL MORE ZOMBIE JESUS
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
8:23 pm
What do you want? He died and came back from the dead. In case you hadn’t noticed:
zombies = cool
therefore:
zombie Jesus = cool
He’s the most badass zombie of them all. Cut us some slack here. The younger generation of geeks is trying to connect to Christianity the only way it knows how.
Praise or Condemn:
4 
0
2:02 pm
Also, why the assumption that ONLY atheists would make zombie Jesus jokes?
We don’t live in a Fundamentalist culture- in Western media, parody is the sincerest form of flattery. It’s part of our language. Zombie Jesus humor is not created out of hatred or malice. If anything, it’s an homage.
It’s how the youth culture relates to the previous generation. It’s how we mock them- the older generation is the straight-man, and we are tossing out sarcastic one-liners. It’s not a personal thing.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
2:17 am
this site is so horrible everything i read is pure vomit
For The Horde!
and zombie jesus
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
11:29 am
Dear religious zealot.
I have stumbled across this website while google searching “Zombie Jesus” websites and I have to say this was indeed the best one. Not only did you attack the cartoons but you went a step further by actually showing them, thus making me laugh. Can anybody detect the brilliant irony here? So I say to you Mr. Withoutreason you have shown yourself to be an ineffective pedagogy (pedophiles different, but you may be one of those as well) of American Conservativism so why don’t you go back to whatever backwater ministry that you reside in and get off of the internet before you embarass yourself further.
Your not so good friend,
Brandon The Atheist
Praise or Condemn:
3 
0
9:31 pm
@happywulf
I love furrys!!!! my boyfriends a furry! *Highfive*
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
2:04 am
OMG These are freaking HYSTERICAL!!! Ironic I would have to come to a christian website to satisfy my atheist sense of humor!
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
12:23 pm
Honestly, is this real? It’s pretty bad when your arguments are so asinine that it’s hard to tell if it’s just a joke. Thanks for the hilarious pictures though!
Praise or Condemn:
3 
0
8:46 am
This guy can’t be real. This has to be a troll. I refuse to believe that anyone can be such a tight ass and be a super ignorant idiot. Maybe I should not have so much faith in the human race.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
11:38 pm
Well played sir!
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
1:19 am
haha, i’ve totally converted a christian with that ‘cosmic jewish zombie’ quote. They didn’t realize how bullshit and full of crack their parents religion was until they read it.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
2:51 am
first off i would like to say thank you for all the laughs it was great
i am so sick of having Christians ram there beliefs down my throat and continuing to tell me just because i do not believe in there so called god i am going to hell. you can take your moral high horse and shove it for all i am concerned. who are you to judge anyone? if i am not mistaken is that not a “sin” to judge other people in your little book of guidelines way to go your actually going to your own hell for being a retard.
welcome to 2010 were most of us have opened our eyes and found out that we can think for ourselves and what we were told as kids is bullshit.
happy zombie jesus day everyone
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:09 am
Whats with all the video games pictures? Please if your gonna disrespect a religion in the name of “atheist” Don’t make us look like a bunch frickin uneducated children that only lash out at religion for attention. And why are only Christians the only ones that get bothered like this? There are other religions. LMFAO Christians should only be the start………
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
4:55 pm
psst.. Zombie Jesus?? B*tch please. He ain’t got nothing on raptor Jesus. Remember children raptor jesus let extinction take him because in his heart he knew that it was the only way. Oh hail Raptor Jesus!!!
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
1:35 pm
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
1:39 pm
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
7:43 pm
Well it’s a little late but Happy Ostara! That was what Easter originally was, celebration of a Goddess. But I think Zombie Jesus makes the better holiday
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
11:53 pm
Heh. I agree about: Christianity: The belief that some cosmic Jewish Zombie can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force form your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree.
Makes perfect sense.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
3:09 am
Why do so many people refer to Hell as a fiery furnace of pain and torment? The Bible doesn’t describe Hell other than saying that it’s a realm that is wholly separated from God and that the traitor of all traitors rules there. However, I believe that the Poet, Dante, gives us our view on what Hell looks like – or at least to him. I will read the Bible to see if I can find any depictions of hell though; the Qu’ran too. I tried to read the Torah, but I confess, it bored me to tears.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
7:13 am
More fuel to the fire!
http://www.google.co.uk/images?q=god%20called%20motivational%20pictures&rls=com.microsoft:en-us:IE-SearchBox&oe=UTF-8&rlz=1I7ADBR_en&redir_esc=&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=og&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wi
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
1:49 pm
I thought all Christians were zombies. Don’t they eat human flesh and drink blood during their rituals?
I AM THE LORD YOUR GOD!
EAT ME!
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:58 pm
I’ve always figured that Jesus was more vampire than zombie. All that drinking the communion wine stuff. Definitely more vampire than zombie. Mind you add in the ‘eat of my flesh’ stuff and he might be a Gay Vampire.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
2:14 pm
It’s strange. The line: “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do” is almost identical to a line in an eminem song, Evil deeds. The line goes: “Father, please forgive me; for I know not what I do”
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
2:51 pm
ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
4:47 pm
OH WELL I SUCK AT POSTING IMAGES.
Praise or Condemn:
5 
0
5:22 pm
it luks gud but it doesn’t have me, kami-sama, in it
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:26 pm
DO NOT WANT. DO NOT WANT.
DO NOT FUCKING WANT.
Praise or Condemn:
4 
0
5:27 pm
ur tsundere for it. liek parsee
parsee: *too busy being raped to objectlol*
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
5:29 pm
Praise or Condemn:
1 
1
5:31 pm
ANIKI!
lackofimagelolol
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:35 pm
DON’T LISTEN TO HIM
…
bang bang!
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
5:38 pm
**
Yoko
derp derp derp
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:40 pm
A title that belongs SOLELY to me.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:43 pm
B-But what`s a badass…? <:3
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:44 pm
WAIT A SECOND.
YOU’RE NOT LAMINGTON. YOU’RE NOT LAMINGTON AT ALL.
LEAVE. NOW.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:48 pm
LEAVE. NOW.
THERE IS NO WAY THAT YOU’RE LAMINGTON. GFTO, POSER.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:51 pm
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:55 pm
Who are you?
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:56 pm
hi, im kami-sama
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:57 pm
You. Yeah, you.
Leave. Now.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
6:01 pm
Wrong side of the world faggot.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
1
5:57 pm
I’m Yuyuko Saigyouji. Who are you oAo?
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
6:00 pm
Hello, is there any food here~?
I`m hungry.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
5:58 pm
… And this is the part where I say nothing.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
6:00 pm
I’ll just let this motivator explain everything~
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
6:01 pm
M- Mistress Yuyuko! What are you doing in a place like this?
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
6:03 pm
….Do you have any food, then
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
6:05 pm
Oh hi, Youmu… Looking for food, of course
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
6:09 pm
Some from games, some from manga, some from anime, dood.
Oh yeah. By the way, dood, ‘anime’ does not mean ‘porn’.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
9:14 pm
Ah, a presumptive atheist. That’s to say a ‘if I can’t make sense of it with my must wipe feces from my backside with a tissued hand because I’m so high and mighty” atheist, who won’t accept God because it doesn’t fit in his amazingly finite perception of knowledge.
You’re insecure and a dolt.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
3
12:50 am
“Despite all the junk posted in the comments, I was going to write personally to the pastor, but then discarded it when the futility overwhelmed me. He is so blinded by his faith, he so closely identifies with Christianity, he could probably never be asked to engage in critical analysis of his own religion.”
Presumption is integral to ignorance and poor communication, my friend. If you ever have a question, please go ahead and ask.
I know the works of Professor Dawkins quite well, and have made The God Delusion required reading for my students and have highly recommended it to my parishioners as well. One of the things I am highly against is not giving people with an opposing point of view to speak.
Even within this community, you’ll find that people from various lifestyle backgrounds have the opportunity to freely speak their minds — be it in comments or if they want to submit a column — to counter a particular point of view.
My faith is built on that which comes from the teaching of Christ. You do not inspire faith or a heart that’s not fickle by blindside propaganda. You challenge your faith in the face of what many to be considered absolute knowledge in their logic and reason. It’s through these tests that one my harden their mettle, while respectfully engaging in conversation with others.
Jesus took this approach in the Bible and I feel each of his followers should take it as well. One of my colleagues, who also writes occasional news columns for our various broadcast and print media networks, actually met Professor Dawkins during a lecture tour and had scheduled a debate — about evolution being unified with various texts of theology (particularly, our Christian faith) — and Richard unfortunately canceled the debate in the last hour, without good explanation. It was a debate, discussion and question/answer session that I really had my heart set upon, and to date I wonder if having the debate in front of a predominantly large Christian venue had something to do with Professor Dawkins canceling the highly anticipated event.
As one other aside, with my background coupled with my studies in history, I spent a substantive amount of time studying Jewish history and plight through the World War 2 era. Despite Hitler’s superficial claims, there is much reason to believe he did not care much for religion but as we see many politicians do to this day, use it as a ruse for leverage and to build a certain comfortable loyalty among the public. Like many other longstanding institutions in society, religion can surely be abused and I certainly have strong confidence Hitler was among the ranks who used religion in his demented agenda to inflict horror upon others.
Also, as a Christian, it is my duty to ask forgiveness for those I feel may be caught in sin. Others do not have to know that when I’m on a plane, I may pray for the flight. When I see someone sick at the hospital, I may silently pray for them. I do not know the people I pray for many times, but in my faith — almost as casually as someone outside faith may say ‘You’re in my thoughts’ when you’re going through an insufferable plight — I find it comforting and an example of what Christ would do to pray for others. Perhaps my prayers are heard, and perhaps they are not. But I do it out of love and a sense of duty and service == not necessarily thinking myself any better and superior — to my fellow man.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
7
9:42 pm
Oh if insecurity means needing facts and not believing in some make believe force just because it makes me feel better then I am extremely insecure.
You’re a prick. Furthermore you are also the reason why most atheists hate theists.
Praise or Condemn:
4 
1
10:37 pm
“‘if I can’t make sense of it with my must wipe feces from my backside with a tissued hand because I’m so high and mighty” atheist”
Wait…WHAT?
Praise or Condemn:
3 
1
12:41 am
C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Praise or Condemn:
3 
1
9:33 am
Christlike. Good response. I want to accept your God now.
Praise or Condemn:
2 
1
10:00 pm
Looks like I hit a soft spot, or maybe we can just add over-sensitivity to your insecurity. What sets me off is how you atheists are some dim-witted to think that you could even begin to fathom God, or set dictates to who he is. If he doesn’t make sense due to ___ he clearly does not exist.
That’s just the most monumental example of thick-headedness I’ve ever seen. I can appreciate an agnostic, but an atheist who basis his assumption on his very own declaration upon the universe is just pathetic.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
5
10:06 pm
No logical retort available eh? Just name calling? Classic.
Praise or Condemn:
2 
0
9:34 am
You are proof; there is no God.
Praise or Condemn:
2 
1
11:45 am
Matthew 5:22 (New King James Version)
22 But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause[a] shall be in danger of the judgment. And whoever says to his brother, ‘Raca!’ shall be in danger of the council. But whoever says, ‘You fool!’ shall be in danger of hell fire.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
1
6:58 pm
Now, feel free to be offended by this, but aren’t you claiming to have more intimate and encompassing knowledge of this God fellow than the rest of humanity? I mean, you do claim that we Atheists (I’ll go ahead and assume you include Antitheists and Agnostic Christians in this, as they do not share your concrete convictions) cannot begin to fathom this guy, and yet you claim to know enough to make that judgment. I mean, unless you knew all about him, how could you possibly tell us that God is completely beyond our grasp. Now, by your tone and awful command of the English language, one could infer that you are just a rabble-rousing, blind, deist idiot, but that would be unfair. However, I’m not an impartial judge, so fuck you, you mouth-breathing moron. I hope you’re sterile.
Praise or Condemn:
5 
1
3:35 am
tl;dr, not relevant to my interests, etc.
I HOPE YOU ENJOYED YOUR EASTER HIJACK, CHIRSTFAGS.
Praise or Condemn:
2 
1
3:57 am
Hello, good sir. We give you credit that your not a nutjob red faced screamer like many other religious people are. You get a big thumbs up there.
You also gain points for having Dawkins as reading material for your groups.
But then you just fall short, as you still believe in a fantasy man.
Now here’s where it gets gritty. For most non-believers, be it atheists, or agnostics who are just lazy atheists, the grind comes from the outspoken fundies. The problem is not that you believe that a fable told to you as a child is true as fact… The problem is that people use these stories as an excuse and as a shield so they can be bigots, racists, and evil vile nasty scum of a person.
Why do you think the terrorists of the world are doing what they are doing? It’s all in the name of religion. I agree with Bill Mahre on this one. That religion needs to end. Before it becomes the catalyst for a radioactive winter.
I’m a Furry, and I’m gay. The essential FurFag. But that has nothing to do with my stance on make believe vs. reality. It’s just a fyi.
Feel free to contact me directly if you want to discuss things rationally.
Praise or Condemn:
4 
2
3:37 am
Uh, no, it’s still about me.
WAIT, WHAT THE HELL. WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
1
4:29 am
I hear the fires of hell singe all the hair off your body.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
3
4:54 am
Well then too bad that when I die, I’ll just cease to exist for all eternity. Religion is a waste of time and money.
And people like you should be put in jail since the only thing stilling your hand if the wrath of a character in a book of fiction. Otherwise people like you claim that they’d readily go on murdering rampages and orgies of rape and theft. Since they think they get all their morals from fear of their afterlife. It’s never morals to simply be a good person. I hope the original poster sees your posts and realizes what his religion does to people. He’s seeing it first hand.
Here too, at Fundies Say the Darnedest Things: http://www.fstdt.net/QuoteArchives.aspx
Praise or Condemn:
4 
1
11:29 am
agreed!
Praise or Condemn:
1 
1
12:36 pm
Hey. Humans (especially Christfags and extremist Christians) are idiots.
Y’know, Jesus once said “Do unto others as what you would want them to do unto you.”. See where they fail?
The irony is sweet.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
1
11:32 am
Agreed. It’s hard not to laught(And I did) but again it is disrespectful of God.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
3
12:43 pm
Where did they fail?
Whoever thought there was a actual Moral Orel commandment #21.
Praise or Condemn:
2 
1
12:36 am
You’re the faggot. The world has enough racism without assholes like you. Learn to embrace and accept other cultures. For Christians, you sure don’t like peace. Idiots.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
1