• God Blesses America With Holy Man Eating Robots (Eatr)

    July 14, 2009 1:11 pm 12 comments

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    Our God has one again showed favor to his U.S. Forces, this time by blessing our military with cutting edge robotic technology.

    As Pastor Gould has warned us many times, the heathen Japanese are working meticulously to create all types of robotic perversions.

    We don’t want to be sneak attacked by giant firebreathing robots on a new Day of Infamy, or have our teen sons and daughters wooed then secretly killed by Japanese femfatale fembots, so we must fight fire with fire! And hear you me, our God has DELIVERED! Glory!

    Look at this new robotic technology that will strike fear into the coldest Asiatic heart!

    Crafted by the hands of God himself, the layout for this technological marvel was given to American company Robotic Technology Inc.  and funded by the Pentagon.

    Terrorists will howl in fear and panic, for as Fox News puts it this godsend shall “be a combination of 19th-century mechanics, 21st-century technology — and a 20th-century horror movie.

    Figure 1.2 – Divine blueprints of American EATR robots show how God designed robot to feast upon the fallen bodies of Satan’s minions.

    I lifted holy hands to praise the Lord when I read about what this thing can do on the battlefield. Robotic Inc. has named this machine the EATR (Energetically Autonomous Tactical Robot) and that name is by no accident. It is by divine design!

    You see, after killing enemy combatants this robot does not let their lowlife corpses go to waste. It will eat them to give itself more energy! That’s right, a robot that runs on the biomass of terror!

    As we find on the EATR’s website, which you may review here:

    “EATR” — “can find, ingest, and extract energy from biomass in the environment (and other organically-based energy sources), as well as use conventional and alternative fuels (such as gasoline, heavy fuel, kerosene, diesel, propane, coal, cooking oil, and solar) when suitable,”

    My legs jump for joy when thinking about how the legs of enemy combatants will wobble in fear when they think about this robot coming over, blowing up their cities and then feasting on the remains! Hah!

    This is definitely one of the pinnacle breakthroughs of the 21st century and I hope we put every weapon known to man on this holy robot, so that we can get to spreading peace, love and freedom to those dirty devilwhore terrorists who need to be shown what’s right.


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    Abe If you don't like what you just read here you can just get out of my country. Now how about that smart-alack. Follow me on twitters. Poke me as your New Friend on Facebook!!

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