• God Causes Solar Eclipse Over Godless Asia, Solar Eclipse 2009 in America Soon

    July 22, 2009 8:02 am 5 comments

    Our master and creator of the universe, God, flexed his power over Asia today by blotting out the Sun. There is no task that’s impossible for our Heavenly Father and the annual solar eclipse he causes is a great reminder of this fact.

    Some heathen Indians in Asia have perverted our Christian solar eclipse day with their false religion, stating that the blackening of the morning sky and blotting of the Sun is the product of their eight-legged spider god of false lies.

    They tried to say this was time for them to get a glimpse into the afterlife. In that sense of course, they are right, because if you’re going around trying to say the solar eclipse is being caused by a false god, you’ll be going to the afterlife alright. And it will be awfully warm there, if you get my drift.

    Hell is a place that burns far hotter than the Sun, so when God shows his ability to cause a solar eclipse by moving all of our planets and moons around like a marble, bow down to worship in awe in splendor.

    Our God is a true cosmic force and it brings tears to my eyes to stand in awe and wonder. Glory.

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    Abe If you don't like what you just read here you can just get out of my country. Now how about that smart-alack. Follow me on twitters. Poke me as your New Friend on Facebook!!

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