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RedditHere’s a great moral conundrum for you hippie-hipster ethical relativists who read Christwire for a rare glimpse of common sense. I know you people love the environment and show that by riding around town on your fancy expensive bicycles. You think it’s funny to pedal in the wrong direction or on sidewalks, knocking old men like myself into fruit stands. Big city bike messengers are even more aggressive, throwing epithets if a man dares to stretch out his toe three lanes away from their pedal paths. But you kids also hate wars and fighting and think violence is a Republican thing. Thirdly, you’re a bunch of greedy materialists who are very attached to the stuff you’ve bought with your parent’s money. So this one should be especially hard for you types to figure out. Let me state this in advance: you’re all a bunch of hypocrites for your replies.
This video was filmed last week in Manhattan’s gay punk rock neighborhood known as the Eastern Village. It shows a man who was caught stealing a very expensive bicycle with a drill. Quickly street justice erupts and a group of well-fed weirdos gather to give him a classic inner-city beatdown. Being a dangerous urban area, the local police forces could not be bothered to get involved. (See the barely coherent rambling of one of the non-prosecuted participants at the bottom.) The video is violent and full of rage, so adults only please! Plus they repeatedly call him “Bro.”
Watch and ask yourself what you would do:
A) Join the gang of dirty hipsters who are beating down a possibly mentally deficient bicycle thief named Bro?
B) Cheer them on and film the event for profit and attention on YouTube?
C) Ignore the whole thing because you’ve got an expensive brunch and an even more painful hangover to deal with? Darn those Appletinis, Mary!
D) Do your Christian duty and stand up for the downtrodden, the suffering, the hungry and save Bro from any more damage to his shiny helmet?
The original illiterate account from The Massive New York Blog:
Here’s the story. I was having brunch on first ave and first street with a a couple of friends including Alfred. It was a pretty sunny day and a good there was a good amount of pedestrian traffic. Nothing unusual. Alfred went out to make a call and spotted someone looking over his bike. Nothing unusual, he got a hot ass cannondale with hot ass wheels. the guy was average looking, had a helmet and a bag. looked like your average joe casual biker. Suddenly this dude gets on his knees and pulls out a drill. At first Alfred thought he wanted to steal his wheels, until he saw the drill. Is this what it has come out to?! people stealing bike with drills? Anyways as he was getting ready to drill the ulock, Alfred comes in the restaurant and yells,! yooooo someones trying to steal my bike, lets go get him. and let me tell you this ass hole tried stealing the wrong bike. first it was a bike messengers bike and second it was Alfred’s bike and the motherFkr got a temper sometimes. so we roll out to this dude and start pounding him. my first instinct was to get my U lock and bang on him, but my bike was already locked up so, we bumbrushed this dude and started pounding him. Everybody is watching and wondering why this dude is being plumeted, but at that point we don’t give a fuck.we had to make sure this asshole dosen’t do it again. me personal i have had 2 bikes stolen, in like a month apart.fuck that shit.he did’t even look like a bike thief! so while pounding him i reach out to put my phone in my pocket and realized i had a camera on my wait. i pulled it out and captured the second half of the beating!
- Excited
- Fascinated
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Stephenson Billings is an Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children's Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector all in one special, blessed package! Facebook me here or Fanmail me: StephensonBillings@yahoo.com ! 
OOOOOwwww! I hate bike thieves!!!! That guy looks like he’s a pro.He came with his own bike helmet and all. I don’t think it’s cool to beat people up but he really doesn’t look like he got that hurt. I mean, what did he expect if he’s stealing in broad daylight on a busy street? Maybe he’ll think twice about doing it again, maybe not. It definitely doesn’t look like it was his first time doing this.
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i dont know why the police just dont put the whole lot of them in jail. but thats inner city ghettos for you.
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I had my bike stolen in July right from in front of my building. It was on the security cam and I made printouts for the police. Of course, they could give two shits about it. Stuff like that doesn’t fall high on their priority list. I’ll probably spot the guys in my neighborhood and the cops wouldn’t lift a finger. Now I take my bike inside my apartment or use a kryptonite lock if I’m somewhere else. These guys don’t realize they’re messing with people’s livelihoods. I ride my bike to work and without it I’d have to take like three buses and a hour commute time.
And what’s with that kung fu pose? LOL!
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Serves him right. The guy got what he deserved, he shouldn’t have been stealing. It’s up to people to protect their property, and by beating on this guy they’re giving him a message not to do it again.
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That’s so darn classy of you Chris. But unfortunately we all know you ride a schwinn with a big orange pennant so you have nothing to fear, no one would want to steal that. Plus, do you really think you’re strong enough to harm a man in a helmet?
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serves the kid right. If he wanted to get a bike, he should have worked for one and gotten one himself. How can you support a THIEF?
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“Thou shalt not steal!” The Bible is pretty clear on this one! It’s like the old story about the guy who steals some bread to feed his family. But beating a guy is not too nice either.
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he didn’t get enough what he deserved. he should have the crap pulled out of him.
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If everyone believed as you do, our society would descend into anarchy.
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If everyone believed as you do, our society would descend into anarchy.
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LMFAO
okay both ends of this fight were both pathetic
1) The guy stealing the bike was stupid for trying to steal one.
2)The guys beating him up were soo retarded for beating him up ove a bike
pretty funny.
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“I know you people love the environment and show that by riding around town on your fancy expensive bicycles.”
What’s so wrong with not wanting to contribute to global pollution?
“You think it’s funny to pedal in the wrong direction or on sidewalks”
The only reason I ride on the sidewalk is because I am absolutely terrified of riding in the street. It’s simply not safe, and it pisses drivers off.
“knocking old men like myself into fruit stands.”
I don’t believe in hurting old people.
“Thirdly, you’re a bunch of greedy materialists who are very attached to the stuff you’ve bought with your parent’s money.”
What’s with this sudden attack on bike riders? You’re being incredibly judgmental here, Stephenson, and your claims are simply untrue. If anybody is greedy, it’s the people who refuse to ride bikes, walk, or take public transportation to get around. It’s the people who jeopardize the health of the planet simply because they cannot be bothered to get around without their car.
Anyway, I would have tried to break up the fight. Even though the thief was in the wrong for trying to steal a bike, getting gang-beaten is an extreme punishment. The only time I would either let the beating continue or join in on the beating would be if the bike thief was Adam Nelson.
However, I have to wonder what the ChristWire authors would think about this story, considering how they displayed absolutely no ounce of forgiveness for the thief in the Deli article (http://christwire.org/2009/08/deli-thief-caught-chewing-the-evidence-w-mugshot/).
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“The only time I would either let the beating continue or join in on the beating would be if the bike thief was Adam Nelson.”
Quoted for hilarity and shared opinion.
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Claire, you’re one of those sidewalk bike-riding liberals! I am not at all surprised. If you ever knocked me into a fruit stand I would telephone your mother.
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I believe I just said that I would never intentionally harm an elderly person (or any person, regardless of age, unless said person was Adam Nelson).
And I only ride on the sidewalk because I’m afraid to ride in the street. I am very careful when I ride on the sidewalk, and I make sure I slow down to a near halt whenever passing somebody. My mom also doesn’t want me riding in the street, because I’ve never taken a driving class, and therefore don’t know all of the “rules of the road”.
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Whoever said I was elderly? I prefer age-appropriate.
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“Whoever said I was elderly? I prefer age-appropriate.”
You did:
“…knocking old men like myself into fruit stands.”
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Well, I do appreciate that you seem to be the only one who offered to break up the fight, Claire. But why am I greedy for riding around in my Honda Civic? I no longer have the balance for a bicycle and those darn kids on the sidewalk are quite upsetting to me. Same with skateboarders. They’re usually too fast for me to hook them with my cane. (A carry a cane for style, not because I am infirm. Really, it’s a bronze handled walking stick.)
Anyway, I must say I’m surprised that Cambridge doesn’t have bike lanes, they’re all the rage in your liberal cities, particularly New York.
This thief does not look like an amateur, here’s a photo of some of his equipment from the Massive Bike website:
[img]http://www.nycmassive.com/bikethief/IMG_0556.JPG[/img]
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“But why am I greedy for riding around in my Honda Civic?”
Why am I greedy for riding around on a bicycle?
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I do not condone nor condemn this video. To really understand the situation at hand you really have to drop your blind rage at cyclist Mr. Billings.
Not all cyclist are young “hipster” kids spending their parents money on expensive bikes. A lot of cyclist are hard working middle aged, middle class folk, how else do you think we can afford multiple thousand dollar bikes? And do you, Mr. Billings, understand what it feels like to have a 2000-3000 dollar bike stolen?
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a car : 10 000$ and more
a bike around 200$ ( the minimal of course )
expansive bike Try again boy
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You all have not bought a bike in some time, the average commuter bike is at least 500 bucks and a decent one can cost over 1000 easy.
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