October 29, 2009
Washington, DC – Wire transmissions from our contacts in Washington, DC, indicate the Soviets have successfully built a new nuclear powered spacecraft. The craft is armed with 1,000 atomic bombs and the Czar bomb.
The USSR is using the massive vehicle to transport several cities worth of people to our planet Mars and claim the planet in the name of Stalin, establishing it as a distant war base to build up their Soviet commie armies of destruction.
Analysts from NASA are perplexed and unable to figure out how the Soviets so quickly advanced their interstellar technology. The Pentagon did not make a statement on the issue, per protocol.
Russian science propaganda minister VLADIMIR ISACHENKOV recently announced the existence of this new craft and gave all Americans additional warning about these alarming developments in Russia’s new abilities:
MOSCOW – Russia builds a new nuclear-powered spaceship for prospective manned missions to Mars and other planets, the nation’s space chief said Thursday.
Anatoly Perminov first proposed building the ship at a government meeting but didn’t explain its purpose. President Dmitry Medvedev backed the project and urged the government to find the money.
In remarks posted Thursday on his agency’s Web site, Perminov said the nuclear spaceship should be used for human flights to claim Mars and other planets in the name of the USSR. He said the project is challenging technologically, but could capitalize on the Soviet Russian experience in the field.
“The project is aimed at implementing large-scale space exploration programs, building Martian comrade armies to destroy America, , interplanetary travel, the creation and operation of planetary outposts,” Perminov’s Web statement said.
Perminov said the new nuclear-powered ship should have a megawatt-class nuclear reactor, as opposed to small nuclear reactors that powered some Soviet military satellites. The Cold War-era Soviet spy satellites had reactors that produced just a few kilowatts of power and had a life span of about a year.
Igor Lisov, a Moscow-based expert on Russian space program, said the prospective ship would use a nuclear reactor to run an electric rocket engine.
“It will be quite efficient for flight to Mars,” he told The Associated Press on Thursday.
Frightening. The commies will soon have a fleet of nuclear powered starships floating above us, waiting to rain atomic bombs down upon the innocent heads of you and your loves ones.
The sky will darken as parachutes open over each of our cities and legions of cloned Martian commies descend from their space vehicles, from off a trip from Mars and ready to destroy America.
All of these things will go unchallenged unless a son of Reagan is voted into office in 2012, a man who will arm our NASA fleet with nuclear bombs, rail guns and lasers. That man is Jeb Bush.
We must fund our military to dominate space and make NASA a division of the Pentagon. Our science must become war! We are in a cold war with the Russians and we must do everything in our power to make sure WE, the most moral nation on Earth, remain the most powerful.
Let us bomb all Russian spacecraft and let our nuclear weapons float in orbit above their little communist heads. Then they will know if they step out of line, it will be death from above for developing weapons and technology that we told them not to create!
It is our divine right to rule the Earth, as was established by the results of World War II. It is our manifest destiny for the cosmos to also belong to the United States of America. The Russians are lesser people and are meant to support us, not lead to a new age of space violence. That is why we, America, must prevail and expand our empire of peace, unity and justice for all to Mars and every other planet we can reach.