Celebrity Muslim Aziz Ansari Finds Mecca of Comedy in Terrorism Jokes
Has 9/11 really become just a punchline for today’s youth? One comedian seems to think so, launching a career on television, the internet and now movies with a dark and often questionable sense of gallows humor. The person in question is Muslim entertainer Aziz Ansari. While the name may be unfamiliar to you, his face is becoming more and more common in American media today. He is the star of the NBC sitcom, “Parks and Recreation” as well as a frequent guest on a number of talk shows. The substance of his comedy is comprised of agitated rants against American consumer culture, without a shred of humility or pathos. He loves to poke fun at our experiences of terrorism, whether it’s minimizing the danger of Osama Bin Laden, mocking the security measures of the Guantanamo Bay facility, or finding cheap humor in the harrowing stories of US hostages in Honduras. Ansari combines this with an overtly lascivious personality, extolling lust towards blond, white women with an almost narcotic intensity. It has become increasingly hard to separate the television personality of Mr. Ansari from the real life Islamic advocate.
In “Parks and Recreation,” Mr. Ansari plays an employee strategically placed in a bureaucratic government agency. He is lazy and corrupt, sneaking every opportunity to sleep or gamble his days away. The show feels like a bad knockoff of “Seinfled” filmed with cheap cameras. The actors never rise above the amateurish, awkwardly staring directly into the camera and speaking with a nervousness they can’t hide. It’s enough to make audiences cringe. In addition, the plots always seems to afford Mr. Ansari some opportunity to spend time around scantily-dressed blond women, and gives him ample time to recap his physical desires afterward.
“Parks and Recreation” was summed up brilliantly recently by the New York Times as a, “summer camp for lightweight one-liners.” Despite this, his character has gained some popularity among disaffected male teens and twentysomethings today. This is in part due to street slang language he employs which younger people find “cool.” He also benefits from the built-in support of the Arab-American tv watching community. When the show began to flounder in the ratings last year, the ever-resourceful Ansari picked a fight with the popular FOX crime series, “Bones.” He famously quipped about the hit FBI drama, “You know why they call that show ’Bones,’ right? Because it should be buried. Oh snap!” The fraudulent feud never really gained momentum as viewers ultimately questioned Aziz Ansari’s sincerity in the whole affair.
In his personal life, Aziz Ansari associates with rap singers Kanye West and R. Kelly, one a known anti-government activist, the other an ex-convict. In the aftermath of 9/11, security agencies were fearful that Muslim extremists would turn to the African-American community for new recruits. Coincidentally enough, watching the comedian’s agitated rants is eerily reminiscent of a YouTube cleric. Ansari is also known to be a frequent internet user and a technical expert (he originally came to New York City to train as an engineer). The hairsuit Arab has used this to his advantage, building up a captive audience on the web through popular websites such as Twitter and MySpace.
Many might find Ansari’s calculated attempts to insert himself in the lives of American’s young people disconcerting. He has an obvious disrespect for authority figures, as shown in his tv roles and personal life. He has been a frequent critic of American culture and seeks out young people (both female and male) to surround himself with. The slothfulness which he loves to portray is another unhealthy characteristic of this comic’s persona. In a day and age when the United States economy is suffering, we need our young people to be inspired to dream and aim for the stars! We need the next generation to learn that hard work is essential to our survival as a nation and that we cannot handle success without a fully-formed ethical consciousness. But is this perpetually unshaven, lazy man an acceptable role model? He has slumped down in every chair he has ever sat in. He seems obsessed with recruiting people half his age into his orbit. And what is his ultimate goal here in the United States?
As one of America’s most visible Islamic television personalities, Aziz Ansari has a responsibility to prove himself to his adopted country. He has a responsibility to be a role model not only to Muslim-American youths, but also to Americans in general. He could be that thoughtful and vigilant patriot whose allegiance is clearly to his country, not to the radical elements of his faith. He could be the hero who shows teens it’s cool to fight terror. He needs to convince his fellow believers that being a US citizen carries obligations and that closing your eyes to threats against this country is immoral, weak and at times against the law. This can be a difficult task. Would you choose your mother over your country? Would you choose your Arab heritage over the heritage and beliefs of the United States? This is a challenge that many in the Muslim community face every day, as radical elements fundraise, recruit and do even worse on our soil. Yet the Arab-American should be America’s greatest asset in the war on terror. They should be keeping the government abreast of the questionable activities and loose talk of their brethren. Self-policing is an important aspect of any thriving and visionary culture. Unfortunately, Ansari continues to be notoriously silent on issues such as these. This ultimately begs the question, when this man’s true intentions are revealed, will it be too late?
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Stephenson Billings
Stephenson Billings is an Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children's Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector all in one special, blessed package! Facebook me here or Fanmail me: StephensonBillings@yahoo.com !
11:19 am
he was in that sanjay and kumar movie 2.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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9:30 pm
oh and yeah: Aziz Ansari: Intimate Moments for a Sensual Evening is out now.
http://www.amazon.com/Aziz-Ansari-Intimate-Moments-Sensual/dp/B002TQKL0W/
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2:55 pm
The picture with this blog is Kal Penn from the Harold and Kumar movies, NOT Aziz Ansari. I hate when people can’t get their facts straight.
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3:56 pm
1. Aziz Ansari’s family hails from India, therefore he is not Arab-American nor is he of Middle Eastern origin.
2. Being born in South Carolina, America is not Ansari’s adopted country. It is his country. He is a native citizen of the United States. In fact, he’s a “good, ‘Ol Southern Boy.”
3. The picture you have is of the actor Kal Penn, not Ansari. If you watched Parks and Recreation and/or completed thorough research to provide the truth in your article, you would know what Ansari looks like. There is no way you completed even a simple search of Ansari without finding an accurate picture of him on the internet.
Why should we believe what you say? It seems like you do not fact check your work nor do you report the truth.
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6:03 pm
Thank you Amy.
Now what you people need to do is a little research. Just because they are brown, does not mean they are the same. Every human being is an individual. What still bothers me is that people get Indians and Arabs mixed up. They look completely different, we just get some image that all arabs and indians are brown and look the same.
You posted Kal Penn, not Aziz Ansari. And like stated, both of them aren’t even muslim nor are they arab NOR should it matter.
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4:02 pm
Aziz Ansari’s parents are actually Tamil Muslims from India. Although he doesn’t state his religion anywhere, he’s most likely muslim.
But still, this whole article is bogus.
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4:29 pm
Mr. Billings,
You are extremely ignorant. My guess is you’ve never traveled outside of North America. Get some help please.
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8:38 pm
Are you kidding? That’s not a picture of Aziz Ansari, first of all. Secondly, Aziz Ansari is American. He grew up and went to governor’s school in Columbia, South Carolina then onto college at NYU. His parents are from India which, last I checked, doesn’t make you an Arab, you stupid stupid bigot!
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11:29 am
after reading all of this all i really got was :”i’m racesist and i don’t understand comedy”
but lets look at a few critical points
“The substance of his comedy is comprised of agitated rants against American consumer culture, without a shred of humility or pathos.”
i’m sorry but he’s a comedian not a political figure what the fuck does pathos have to do with anything here? pathos is to apeal to peoples feelings. what would that serve? and humility? well it’s not a part of his routine to be humble he’s not exactly selfrightous either. unlike some other people we know(hint hint).
“The actors never rise above the amateurish, awkwardly staring directly into the camera and speaking with a nervousness they can’t hide.”
what does this have to do with anything? so he’s a bad person because he’s in a comedy show you find to be bad most likely because you do not understand the concept behind it.
“Ansari combines this with an overtly lascivious personality, extolling lust towards blond, white women with an almost narcotic intensity.”
so because he’s not white he can not find what society has decided is a good looking woman to be attracting. you are sugesting that non-white should only be together with other non-whites? god how racesist of you once again. if he finds blodes hot then fucking let him.
“The fraudulent feud never really gained momentum as viewers ultimately questioned Aziz Ansari’s sincerity in the whole affair.”
yes god forbid a comedian should ever say something as a joke right?
“In a day and age when the United States economy is suffering, we need our young people to be inspired to dream and aim for the stars!”
thats actually a really bad idea. what happenes if people with huge dreams try to realise them whille they can’t get the money to do so? thats right they will fail.
“He seems obsessed with recruiting people half his age into his orbit.”
nobody is recruiting anyone. he simply has a growing fanbase because he’s funny.
“And what is his ultimate goal here in the United States?”
what is your goal? huh? HUH?!?!?!
here’s an idea: maybe he just want’s to have ajob he likes earn some good money and then live a decent life following the values he belive in? wait no he has to be a terrorist right? i mean he’s not out screaming about how christianity is the only way to save the world and if you’re not doing that you must be a terrorist(or at least in leauge with them…or maybe just deluded to think they don’t exists but thats only if you’re white right?)
“He could be the hero who shows teens it’s cool to fight terror.”
makeing fun of terror is the best way to combat it. it’s only goal is to create fear. if you laugh at it it has failed misrably.
“He needs to convince his fellow believers that being a US citizen carries obligations and that closing your eyes to threats against this country is immoral, weak and at times against the law. ”
what threaths? seriously i’d guess he’s one of those sane people who don’t belive that america is at war with the world so why should he preach something he don’t belive?
“Would you choose your Arab heritage over the heritage and beliefs of the United States?”
what kind of weird paradox is this? to choce the islamic belif while not enforcing it on anyone, over a belif that says you can belive whatever you want?….my head hurts.
“Yet the Arab-American should be America’s greatest asset in the war on terror. They should be keeping the government abreast of the questionable activities and loose talk of their brethren. Self-policing is an important aspect of any thriving and visionary culture. Unfortunately, Ansari continues to be notoriously silent on issues such as these.”
i’m sorry but what reason do you have to belive that this man would know anything about terror plots? do you know something FBI don’t? thats like saying you’re white…you knew hitlers plans why didn’t you stop him? shame on you for not stoping hitler.
all in all this is nothing but a retardet hate speech against a man you disagree with. and as allways since you disagree you refuse to learn about it. because you don’t know about it you fear it. because you fear it you hate it. and because you hate it you refuse to learn about it. welcome back to the never ending cycle of ignorance.
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10:12 pm
Dear Jazzy,
Thank you for your comments. While I am flattered by your close reading of my text, you have made many errors which I feel obligated to clarify.
1) Any person, whether they be a religious figure or a media personality becomes part of the political process once they start taking very extreme political stands. Mr. Ansari has undoubtedly jumped in the fray with his underhanded dislike of all the wonderful things this country provides. Also, being a media celebrity makes him a perfectly acceptable figure for a newspaper profile such as this.
2) I pointed out the poor quality of the acting in Parks and Recreation as part of my tv reviewing responsibilities here on Christwire. The article is also a guide for the tv viewing audience.
3) We do need Americans to dream AND word hard to build a better future!
4) In regards to threats against the US. We have had many, many instances of terrorist groups recruiting, fundraising and even training on US soil. The FBI and CIA have intercepted many that we probably don’t even know about. Under President George Bush, this was a constant concern of this country’s national security team. It is a battle that still wages and puts the lives of every single American at risk.
5) I find your accusation that my article is “hate speech” both specious and hurtful. I was not the won who chose to attack the United States. That was the terrorists. I am only trying to approach this dilemma with logic and foresight. What I have said here in this news article has been repeated by many, many other experts in the field in the highest positions of government.
I am glad to be able to clear up your problems for you.
Stephenson
2)
Hot debate. What do you think?
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12:07 am
“2) I pointed out the poor quality of the acting in Parks and Recreation as part of my tv reviewing responsibilities here on Christwire. The article is also a guide for the tv viewing audience.”
I thought that “tv reviewing” was Dan’s responsibility, dipshit.
“3) We do need Americans to dream AND word hard to build a better future!”
Word hard, bro! Woo!
“I was not the won who chose to attack the United States.”
“the won”? Yowza! Did you flunk first grade or something?
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12:14 am
Claire, I really do feel like I’m lowering myself each time I respond to your comments. You have a clear left wing bias and an anti-authoritarian chip on your shoulder. It believe it’s due to the fact you’re still a teen, angry at adults, rebelling with clothes choices and internet facebooks, all trying to understand the big world out there. It’s not easy, kiddo! But have faith, you will hopefully make something of yourself some day. Hard work! Keep at it!
I could try to respond to your petulant typing above, but what’s the point? You never actually say anything constructive or intelligent. (I’m sorry if that sounds harsh, but at this point I believe honesty can only help you. (No more coddling!)
Stephenson
Hot debate. What do you think?
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12:27 am
“You have a clear left wing bias”
Wow Billings, did you figure that out all by yourself? I NEVER would have thought of myself as being left wing, I mean, after all, you can’t get more right-wing than voting for Obama and Coakley, can you?
“It believe it’s due to the fact you’re still a teen, angry at adults, rebelling with clothes choices and internet facebooks, all trying to understand the big world out there.”
*sigh*, once again, you’re making assumptions, fatty. First of all, yes, I am still a teen, but I am not angry at adults. Considering how one of the biggest characteristics of teens who dislike adults is contempt towards parents. If you’re like me, and you cry whenever you can’t come home from school every weekend because you’ll miss your parents too much, if you still kiss your parents goodbye in public, then you have absolutely no anger towards adults. And I’m rebelling with clothes choices? Well, that’s something new, considering how my mom buys my clothes for me. I shop in the WOMEN’S section of the store, not the MISSES. There’s a huge difference, namely that the clothing in the women’s section isn’t designed for whores. And yes, I have a facebook, which I post ALL the pictures of my cats, of my beagle, and of the school’s new baby bunnies. Boy, what a rebel!
“But have faith, you will hopefully make something of yourself some day.”
Yes, because I’m in my second year of veterinary technician school just for shits and giggles…
“(No more coddling!)”
Yuck! The thought of you coddling ANYBODY is enough to make the bile rise in my throat. Sick.
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1:58 am
I agree that the man , Aziz, is a sheep in wolf’s clothing. He is infiltrating himself within the holy flock of the Lord- the United States of America, grounded on One God. And I might add, not the muslim god of those Arab hethens.
The youth of America look up to this man while never knowing where he falls in the underground terrorist movement. He should be removed from television, not glorified and popularized.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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3:20 am
hey claire tell adam his favorite pagan warlock is back and looking for him
Praise or Condemn:
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10:19 pm
This is not some online gay chat. Please save your intimate communications for your next alleyway encounter or video cam session. It is entirely inappropriate here.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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10:33 pm
so your going on the record saying that adam is gay? kekeke
Praise or Condemn:
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10:41 pm
That’s pretty shameful of you to accuse Adam of being gay. The genuine Adam is most certainly not a homosexual, despite what you may intimately desire. I think it’s wrong of you to seek this man out for your own private gratifications. Again, I ask you to keep it in your pants and off my journalism.
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11:22 pm
i didnt accuse anyone of anything, but adam is totally gay for jesus right?
HAIL ERIS! ALL HAIL DISCORDIA!
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11:26 am
1. let’s try again then. pathos is a retorical thing used to make people agree with you. a comdians goal is not to make them agree but to make them laugh. a far better thing to use for that is logos which he uses plenty of. he isn’t trying to build a political carrer so pathos is useless and humility serves him no purpose.
2. no you pointed out that you didn’t understand the concept. it’s like me makeing a review over the bible and complain that there’s a shitty build-up of tension and that thye climax sucks and a lack of charecter devlopment in jesus. i may be right but it has shit to do with the point of anything.
3. i have allready explained why dreaming can be a bad idea in these times. ofcourse it does depend on how big your dream is and if you wait with trying to realise it until you actually have the resources.
4.you made the asumption that every muslim has detailed information that could lead to the aprihention of osama bin laden and stoping the taleban but they are simply with holding it. and thats retartdet. thats like me asumeing you know all of the secret plans of the vaticant. well you can get your terror info when you tell us about what the vaticant is up to these days.
5.”I was not the won who chose to attack the United States.”
maybe not but i was however your choice to attack aziz ansari.
also what reason do you have to asume that he is a terrorist and that he poses a treath? you simply found a man that disagrees with you and as such you disliked him and wrote a rant about he’s a bad man. that’s a hate speech in my book. do you think i fell bad for hurting you? fuck no you deserve it. treat others like you wanna be treated. and before you go on about how you have nothing but love in your heart: YOU WERE THE ONE POSTING AN ARTICLE ABOUT HOW A SINGLE COMDIAN IS AN EVIL PERSON!!! if you do not consider that to be the least bit hurtful then i will cnsider it unfair that you were hurt. btw if thats the case i’d like to know since i’ll have an article to write about you.
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10:53 pm
I find your nonchalance about the inaccurate photo accompanying your article quite disturbing from a journalistic standpoint. The man pictured IS Kal Penn, associate director of the White House office of public liaison. The fact that you haven’t corrected the mistake after multiple people have pointed out the error to you is perhaps even more troubling. As a journalist, I’m sure you’re familiar with the importance of credibility and transparency, not to mention fact-checking before publication. Your failure to catch this simple error, especially after you claim to have spent time watching the show in which Aziz Ansari appears, and your negligence in acknowledging the error deeply undermines your credibility as the “journalist” you claim to be. Any freshman in any J-school could tell you that much.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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11:17 pm
Who in the world are you to make such a fuss about “integrity”? My integrity is intact and I have no worries about that. As for the photo, it’s distracting you people from the general truth of my reporting. Why can’t you just think on that part and put your hand over the photo if you find it so offensive and terrible? You people really are crazy. And you don’t know anything about the internet. It is incredibly difficult to change something that has been published on the web. Once it’s done, it’s out there forever. You just can’t go in there and muddle things around. How would that work for the integrity of the New York TImes for instance? Whenever someone questioned something wrong in their reports, they could always sneak back in and change things and then say, “hmmmm… I don’t see anything wrong here.” The internet is made o publish things like this to protect the public and to protect the truth. You are merely doing a disservice to the public.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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2:26 am
If you are using the argument to put up one’s hand to cover the image of Kal Penn (which you originally attributed to Aziz Ansari), then why not just use both of your hands and cover your ears whenever Aziz or any comic speaks on topics that you find unsavory or wrong?
I mean, that’s why God gave us hands, right? To block out the things in everyday life which cause us the slightest amount of mental anguish?
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9:12 am
Mr. Billings, I work for a magazine and spend the better part of my Monday-Fridays writing for the web, so I know how exceedingly easy it is to go back and change something that has been published online. “Who I am” to question your integrity as a journalist is a fellow member of the field with a degree in our practice. Changing something inaccurate in a report online is similar to the way newspapers have done it in print all along; you don’t change the body of the text, you add an addendum to the beginning or end of the article preceded by the word “correction” or “update.” In the case of your photo, I would advise changing the image and adding to the body of the text something like “Note: The image that originally ran with this article was of Kal Penn, not e Aziz Ansari, about whom this article is written. We apologize for the mistake.”
An anecdote from my own life this week: I wrote an article about an upcoming release from a band I like and, relying on my own memory of their work, I included an error in my article. It didn’t affect the content of the article, but it was an error nonetheless. A commenter caught it, and my editor noticed before I did. He replied, thanking the guy who pointed out the mistake in the first place, double-checked to make sure I had indeed gotten it wrong, and changed the fact in the article. The documentation of the fact that an error was made and corrected is right there on the page with the story for anyone to see. It’s not sneaky to take steps, even after publication to make sure what you publish is true. It IS sneaky to leave something false on your publication when you know it’s false. It’s sneaky to tell your readers that it’s incredibly hard to change things after publication on the web when it’s actually much, much easier to do this online than it is in print. And print people still manage to do it: magazines and newspapers have a section at the front of the book that’s reserved for setting factual errors from the previous edition straight.
You mentioned protecting the truth, and I don’t see how you can do that by leaving a false statement published for others to read. I’m not suggesting that you change anything your readers ever say is wrong – you obviously deal with a lot of contention in your comments section. I am suggesting, however, that when someone points out a factual error, you take that seriously. You look it up yourself. Don’t ask your intern to do it, especially if he gave you the wrong photo in the first place. If you find out that a mistake has truly been made, take the time to rectify it in a transparent way that allows your readers the knowledge that you didn’t get it right the first time and that you’re being diligent that what you put out into the world isn’t misleading.
In our business, being convinced of your own integrity isn’t good enough. You’ve got to convince your readers, too – and not just the ones who agree with you, either.
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7:39 pm
You’re fucking crazy, right? You do know how easy it is to go in and edit an article online? Somebody needs some night-time community college computer classes…
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7:32 pm
This article is complete and utter bullshit, in case you didn’t realize that yet.
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8:39 pm
You should write for the onion. Hilarious.
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6:25 pm
STRAW MAN A-HOLE
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11:47 am
Interesting article and you bring up some good points about tv stars and there responsibilities. With all the Conan and Leno stuff in the news people forget that this is more than mindless entertainment, it affects peoples lives and the way they think.
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12:16 am
Thank you, sir! And thank you for your service! We need more men of action in the action so to speak!
Hot debate. What do you think?
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7:21 pm
Why do you still have a picture of Kal Penn instead of Aziz Ansari? Is your Google broken, moron, or are you trying to make it sound like all arab-americans look alike? Racist!
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12:26 am
That is exactly what I was thinking! It’s almost like he’s saying “I’ll just throw a picture of any non-caucasion celebrity on here. I can’t tell the difference; I’m sure no one will notice.” It’s 2010…you should be ashamed of yourself. Aziz is an entertainer. If you don’t have a sense of humor, that’s your own fault. People who know how to laugh enjoy his work. Furthermore, the man was born in South Carolina. You’re acting like he’s Osama Bin Laden.
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6:36 am
Neither Kal Penn nor Aziz Ansari are Arabs. It seems that you are not only extremely ignorant, but also totally unwilling or unable to learn from your mistakes.
I mean, seriously, what kind of “journalist” refuses to post an admission of error and correction of such serious mistakes, including:
(a) the use of incorrect pictures of the subject of the article (picture is of Kal Penn, not Ansari);
(b) reference to incorrect religious beliefs (as I explain below, Ansari is not a Muslim);
(c) reference to incorrect citizenship status (i.e., Ansari is a natural born American, not someone who “adopted” US citizenship); and
(d) reference to incorrect ethnic heritage (Ansari is Indian, not Arab. And by the way, just fyi, Arabs are considered Caucasians for legal and census purposes in the US).
It is hard to imagine the cognitive dissonance required to write–without irony–an article about an individual’s background and motivations while using completely incorrect photographs and completely fabricated personal information.
By the way, Ansari stated in a recent interview with Rolling Stone Magazine that his parents are Muslim but he is an atheist. He essentially said Islam is not for him.
Try doing some research. How do you expect to form a thoughtful and defensible position if you’re starting out with factual inaccuracies?
Mr. Billings, I must ask: Are you simply a liar or just someone who is uninterested in the truth? Frankly, whichever is true, it is quite clear that you have embarrassed yourself. You should be ashamed of your blatant and indefensible prejudices.
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12:19 pm
Your article is hateful and wrong, and so is the picture accompanying it. That is NOT Aziz. It’s another brown guy, Kal Penn. Check yourself before you wreck yourself.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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10:16 pm
Your comments are offensive and insincere. I don’t know why you are so irritated. I put a lot of love into my article and I believe it shows. I do not hate anyone but I have the light of my faith to show them how to grow beyond their limitations! Believe it or not, Mr. Ansari could achieve something in this life if only he put his head to it! So there you go, I am actually a supporter of this man. I want to see him dump all the terrible aspects of his life and do something good for once. As for the photo question, I will forward your note to my intern but I have been assured that that is indeed Mr. Ansari.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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11:31 am
who the fuck are you to say this man hasn’t achived what he wanted? not everyone want to be a crazy christian when they grow up billings. you have no room for compasion of people who are difrent in your heart and there is no love in your article. i too think you could be a better person if you used your brain to think rather than your bible but i’m not calling you a bad or sad person for that. i’m just saying i sure as hell don’t like you. and that makes me bad to some degree but at least i don’t claim that i hate you out of love.
also whats offensive? him disagreeing? and you might want to look up insincere cause it doesn’t mean what you think it does. if he belives what he says he is sincere you asshat.
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12:33 pm
The insulting of the intelligence of the hardworking Americans has finally come home to roost. The shoe bomber shows us what a failure Obama is on nat’l security. Senator Brown’s election in Massachusetts shows that the people are fed up and know how to vote! Change We Can Believe In is a fraud perpetrated upon the citizens of this beautiful country. We are going back to basic values and we will make our own decisions about our health care, loaning money to buy a home, buying a car with a downpayment. We don’t need the government interfring nor intervening in our freedoms. The White House needs to now this because we will retake a majority of the House and Senate in 2010. The Second American Revolution has begun.
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1:31 pm
Wow…see, now this guy scares me far more than any of the CW’s, even Shat, because I think he’s actually serious…
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2:26 pm
i’m sorry but where’s the “failure” with that shoe bomber? wasn’t he stopped? or was there another terror bombing i didn’t hear about? what do you want security to do? stop them before they plan the terror attack?
how was “change we can belive in” a fraud? because people where too stupid to actually find out what the change was?
oh and have it ever ocured to you that maybe not everyone agrees with you when it comes to healthcare? i’d asume there’s a few people out there who’d like to be able to get a bit of treatment if they need it. also whats with the loaning money and buying a car? when were you prohibited from that?’
but sure start a revolution. best case senario you guys losse worst case america aliantes itself from the rest of the world…wow firts time i’ve heard of a losse/losse situation that is sure to end in epic fail.
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3:51 pm
they said USA has the best health care when the entire world said otherwise all europe has better health care France has the best one
yes all RICH canadian or RICH european go to USA for treatment but what about the POOR american who are UNINSURED ?
if you want to regain the senate and become a totalitarian country said it we will unally with you and we won’t believe to your crap anymore
oh and like jazze mentioned nobody prohibit you from buying a car or a House you can do it you still have your freedom but I guess with Bush you were free to be terrorized ?
oh and Never said communism is evil you are worst than any despotism and communism together seriously as a country you really Suck
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5:34 pm
Why cant you crazy people respect others beliefs instead of believing the world revolves around you and your crazy racist beliefs. Oh yea that picture, thats Kal Penn. Great research skills.
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10:00 pm
Oh man, Vetblabla thinks this site is real. Oh man oh man. Ugh people are so goddamn stupid.
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12:41 pm
Wow.
Clueless – You have posted someone Kal Penns picture instead of Aziz
Racist – You believe that Aziz is not worthy of lusting after blonde women. You feel that he does not show enough humility while making fun of people.
Hateful – You obviously hate Muslims.
I dont have the time to go through how many ways your article is wrong and terrible.
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10:21 pm
Even if the photo wasn’t Ansari, what does it matter for the content of my news article? I am not full of hate, as I have stated many time. You people are reading the completely wrong things into my article. This is, first of all, a Christian website. We review the world with the foundation of the world’s greatest morals teachings. And I don’t hate muslims. In fact, I believe I am doing them a great, immeasurable service by being completely honest with them about the failings of their patriotism and religious problems. If only more Americans were as honest as I am…
Hot debate. What do you think?
4 
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12:12 am
“Even if the photo wasn’t Ansari, what does it matter for the content of my news article?”
Considering all the errors you’ve made in your little articles, you’d be laughed out of any real news organization.
“I am not full of hate”
Yes, you are.
“And I don’t hate muslims.”
Then why didn’t capitalize the M in Muslims? After all, you capitalized the C in Christian.
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11:35 am
ah so you admit we are helping you when we say all those hurtful things to you? or is it only you who is alowed to help by being a dickhead to other people?
the picture being wrong means everything because it’s proof taht you do not check sources properly. you claim to have review the show but you can’t even see that the man in the picture is not the man of the show…how fucking stupid do you think i am?
also moral is nothing but a set of rules set up by people with power. asking anyone but christians you have the wrong morals. or as this site has proved again and again: anyone not christian and quite a few christians aswell.
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9:52 pm
Did you really defend posting a picture of Kal Penn on an article about Aziz Ansari with “what difference does it make to the content of my article?”
Um, how about all of the difference in the world? Your defense is basically, “what’s the difference, they’re both brown!”
Like if I wrote a story about President Bush and inserted Bill Clinton’s picture. What’s the difference, they’re both white, right?
Are you fucking retarded?
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1:02 pm
Dear Sir,
Might I suggest you find a new intern who is actually capable of typing “Aziz Ansari” into google (with or without speech marks) and then clicking on the “images” option. Alternatively, you could even try doing this yourself, it’s really very simple.
However, just to save you those few seconds, here is the link to page 1 of the search results: http://www.google.com/images?hl=en&safe=off&rlz=1B2GGGL_enBE205BE205&q=aziz%20ansari&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi
Now I realise that due to the fact that both Messrs Penn and Ansari are from the Indian sub-continent may leave you unable to distinguish one from the other on account of their darker hued skin – but if you look closely, you will see that they are in fact separate individuals.
You are theoretically correct in stating that Christwire is a “Christian Website”. However, like so many of the religious right, you appear to base your faith on the teachings of the Old Testament rather than the messages in the New Testament. Given that the latter includes the teachings of Christ upon which the Christian faith is derived, it might be argued that you are not in fact a Christian. Christ preached a message of peace, understanding, reconciliation, compassion and tolerance – this in part led to his being martyred as these concepts were revolutionary and in stark contrast to the staple religious text of the time. Where is your understanding and tolerance? Just because you disagree with another individual’s beliefs or opinions doesn’t permit you as a Christian to condemn them. Ansari is an American – I believe of Sri Lankan origin – and nothing I have ever seen of him indicates that he is an antagonist or anti-American. He comments on modern society (however distasteful to you that may be) and generally points out how ridiculous much of the current media culture is.
You criticise him for his association with R. Kelly and Kanye West. Unless I’m mistaken, Mr. Ansari is free to associate with whomever he chooses, as are you and I. In actuality, my recollection of his relationships with West and Kelly are that he pokes fun at them too. R. Kelly for example he described on Jimmy Kimmel as an amazing R&B singer “slash, crazy person”. Kanye West may have been anti the Bush administration, but let’s face it, by the end of President Bush’s second term you would have had difficulty finding people in the US who though the man was doing a good job. West is also a Christian, speaking in his release “Jesus Walks” about the hypocrisy of how radio stations were happy to play songs about murder, drugs and misogyny but as West commented “but if I talk about God, my record won’t get played?”.
To return once more to the key Christian theme of forgiveness and tolerance, I presume that you supported former President George W. Bush. That is a man publicly known to have abused both alcohol and cocaine, yet you forgave him for that. Why can you not be as accepting of other persons whose behaviour you may find abhorrent? As a last point the Muslim faith recognises Christ, not as the son of God, but as a Prophet. You see? You’re not so different after all. Next time you’re tempted to write another reactionary, ill-informed and poorly researched article, based I can only assume on what someone told you, reconsider and truly think about your faith and its teachings.
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1:34 pm
Mr. “Billings”,
I must apologise. My initial post was a gut-reaction having read only this article and some of your subsequent rebuttals. Having now read a little more about you, I have learnt that you are in fact a satirical humourist of some renown. I therefore congratulate you for writing this highly amusing piece and also for pulling the wool over so many people’s (myself included) eyes.
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3:55 pm
“Has 9/11 really become just a punchline for today’s youth?”
No, it hasn’t.
“The substance of his comedy is comprised of agitated rants against American consumer culture”
The only difference between him and you is that your agitated rants are directed at…everything except consumer culture…except for that one shitfit you had regarding holiday calendars.
“with an overtly lascivious personality”
Your overuse of that word, coupled with the fact that you put it in bold letters, shows that you have a raging boner for it.
“extolling lust towards blond, white women”
Not as bad as lusting over 18 YEAR OLDS, like you do, Mr. Pervert.
“The actors never rise above the amateurish, awkwardly staring directly into the camera and speaking with a nervousness they can’t hide.”
That’s the whole point of the show! I’ve only seen bits and pieces of it, but it’s made by the same people who made The Office. The idea of The Office is that the viewer is essentially an observer in the office life of these characters; that they know that you’re there and are almost being interviewed by you.
“He famously quipped about the hit FBI drama, “You know why they call that show ’Bones,’ right? Because it should be buried. Oh snap!””
He’s right, “Bones” should be buried. It’s a cheesy, poorly acted, unrealistic ripoff of “The X-Files”. ‘Nuff said.
“Ansari is also known to be a frequent internet user”
*Gasp!* Who the hell isn’t?
“He seems obsessed with recruiting people half his age into his orbit.”
Ahem, says the man who recruits young boys to go on camping trips…
“He could be the hero who shows teens it’s cool to fight terror.”
Are you fucking demented? Like what, fighting terror is going to be the new “fad”? Grow up.
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8:21 pm
Claire, you obviously have not watched Parks And Recreation so please don’t comment on it until you’ve seen the show! Go watch it a little bit for me and THEN write from an informed perspective.
Also, “Bones” is a fantastic tv show! I love the stories and that secret FBI agent makes me laugh. You people who hate it don’t have a clue.
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2:41 am
so not only do we have to live by your damned morals we have to like the same fucking tv shows as you?
ever considered the idea that some people like difrent things than you? i find bones to be extreamly boring and i have never watched an enitre episode simply because i fall asleep. also whille claire may not have watched the show in question i’d any day rather hear the openion of a person that at least undertsnd the concept. you clearly don’t you expect…allright i have no idea what you expect. but you certaily didn’t expect the format used for this show and based on taht you conclduded it sucks. i don’t like books therefor the bible sucks. and since i have that openion everyone must share it.
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4:35 pm
Isn’t that the dude that left House almost a year ago to work on the Obama administration?
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5:17 pm
You are fucking idiots the picture is Kal Penn, Kal Penn is Indian Morons. Nice legit want to be website. Do you people have down syndrome?
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5:19 pm
Really? do you people on christ wire really think that 3/4 of the world that are not christian are going to hell, you are all biast morons. keep your religious thoughts to yourself because nobody cares!
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5:43 pm
Then you shouldn’t care about other people converting. Nobody cares if you don’t believe in a god!
Anyways, almost nobody on Christwire believes in a god, only the editors and a few choice commentors.
Yes, we all know it’s Kal Penn, who left the television show House MD to work for Obama.
And this isn’t a legit website. In all probability it’s just a very complicated satirical website.
Fucking idiot… Do you ever think before you speak?
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10:24 pm
Shameful, I’m not sure why you have a vendetta against me. Your failure was a fault of your belief system, your sincerity and your writing. Please look at yourself before you lash out at those around you with your immature claims.
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12:01 am
Billings how do you know that is Shameful do you have a ip address of everyone that makes a comment.
I didn’t believe you could do a article without a shirtless men on it.
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12:05 am
Haha I don’t think it’s Shat…
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12:14 am
Billings, you do realize that you’re making yourself look like a psychopath by accusing every new person of being shameful_truth? People are probably scratching their heads and muttering to themselves, “who the fuck is this shameful person, and who is this psycho bald guy?”
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12:21 am
I know what I know.
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1:15 am
You know Billings, I’m starting to wonder if all of this pointing fingers at everyone calling them Shameful is your way of covering up the fact that, in reality, you are the “Man behind the Shat…”
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1:33 am
I realize it’s hard to comprehend the man behind the screen name on the internet, but anyone who compares writing styles and faith and love and dedication would clearly see the difference. At least I hope and pray so (I am a certified journalist, after all.)
I really don’t want to get dragged into a discussion about Shameful, but I can say that I am not unhappy that he is gone (somewhat, he still lurks here and there in other screen names, promoting his old articles and trying to get some kind of reaction, any kind of reaction… Frankly, if you want that level of attention go to DailyKos or something, they love commenting for ever and ever on this site. Or better yet, use http://omegle.com/ — it’s the perfect way to waste hours talking nonsense with anonymous strangers you’ll never meet.)
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1:41 am
Try to sound a little more paranoid, why don’t ya? I bet you’re a regular visitor of those sites, ain’t ya, Stevie? And what about all of the hours you spend wasting talking with strangers that you’ll never meet on this site?
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2:02 am
you’re the one whose paranoid.
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4
2:13 am
Actually, no. You’re the one who’s seeing Shat everywhere, saying that he has a vendetta against you personally, and calling every new person who pops up on here Shameful.
Just in case you’re confused about the definition of “paranoid,” here’s the good ol’ Merriam Webster for ya:
Main Entry: para·noid
Pronunciation: \ˈper-ə-ˌnȯid, ˌpa-rə-\
Variant(s): also para·noi·dal \ˌper-ə-ˈnȯi-dəl, ˌpa-rə-\
Function: adjective
Date: 1904
1 : characterized by or resembling paranoia
2 : characterized by suspiciousness, persecutory trends, or megalomania
3 : extremely fearful
Now, in a calm and rational manner (and by that, I mean not yelling at me in all caps that I need to calm down), explain to me how it is that I am paranoid, by that definition above, and you are not.
I eagerly await this response, because I’m anticipating a good, hearty Epic Face-Palm of Doom as only you, Stevie, can deliver.
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2:20 am
Also, surely an “accomplished, established journalist” such as yourself should know that you should have used “who’s” instead of “whose” back there. Yet another reason for us to suspect you of being the Man Behind the Shat (I should sell that title to James Patterson…)
Or did you take his article on contractions seriously?
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6:44 am
hahahahaha
You think I’m Shameful?
Do you really think I sound even remotely like him?
hahahahaha xD
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2:59 am
Dear Sir or Madam,
I know very little about you since you are so worried and afraid about revealing yourself here. You are simply an antagonist, threatening, bullying, shouting whenever you get the chance. Nor are you a copy editor, I might add. Frankly, I don’t know where you get off slathering you wacko attacks all over me. What have I done to you? I have only opened my heart and shown the love deep there inside! I am on YOUR team! I wish you kids could understand that. There is so much we can experience hand in hand. But you must give that hand to me first. One of the wonderful experiences of my life is spending time with our littlest people, instructing and nurturing, directing and sometimes gently admonishing… I do this because I want to make this world (and yes this country!) a better place than I found it. Sadly, it is descending into the most unimaginable hardcore depths on a daily basis. The perversity and sanctimoniousness of our teens today is enough to… well, i don’t know hardly what, but there are little compound of faith we can wall up and try to build a shelter of insight therein. I hope to do that too, maybe plant some seeds in the children of tomorrow. Inside my walls, there we can watch over things. We can build outside of fears of the politcally correct police and jack boot feds and your other naysayers. Think and dream, my friend! I surely do. I do! So there you have it. I hope you take it and plant it like a flower. it shall bloom!
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4:05 am
“Dear Sir or Madam,”
As I have continually referenced to the fact that I am of the male persuasion, I’m not sure exactly why you are confused about this, but moving on…
“I know very little about you since you are so worried and afraid about revealing yourself here.”
Yes, because I am the only one who does not use their real name on here. However, whenever I do talk about aspects of my personal life you accuse me of lying.
“You are simply an antagonist, threatening, bullying, shouting whenever you get the chance.”
Once again, Stevie, you are confusing me with you. Try pointing that accusatory finger at yourself for once instead of everyone else around you.
“Nor are you a copy editor, I might add.”
Actually, not only is that exactly what I do for a living, but so do my father and my sister. Sorry, Steve-o. Granted, out of the rest of the Christ-tards on here, you admittedly have the best sense of grammar, spelling and sentence structure, however when you’re running up against the likes of Abe and Amber, that’s really not saying very much…
“Frankly, I don’t know where you get off slathering you wacko attacks all over me. What have I done to you?”
To me, personally? Nothing. But your constant attacks on homosexuals and other “minorities” pisses me off, and so I call you out on your hypocrisy. And then you throw one of your little bitch fits and go pout in your bedroom, crying because nobody loves you.
“I have only opened my heart and shown the love deep there inside!”
“There is so much we can experience hand in hand.”
“But you must give that hand to me first.”
“One of the wonderful experiences of my life is spending time with our littlest people, instructing and nurturing, directing and sometimes gently admonishing…”
“I hope to do that too, maybe plant some seeds in the children of tomorrow.”
“Inside my walls, there we can watch over things.”
And you wonder why we all think you’re a gay pedophile? “Plant some seeds in the children of tomorrow,” Stevie? Honestly…
“Think and dream, my friend!”
As an aspiring author, I do dream quite a bit, though my dreams do not consist of camping trips with twelve year old boys all of whom just so happened to forget their swim trunks, so I guess by your standards I don’t dream after all.
“I surely do. I do! So there you have it. I hope you take it and plant it like a flower. it shall bloom! ”
See both of my last two comments for this one.
Here’s an idea, instead of “planting seeds” of intolerance, why don’t you instead take a page out of that certain book and “do unto others as you would have them do unto you?” How would you like it if some asshole came up to you on the street and told you that you were a sinner for loving the person you love, or because you’re of a different ethnic, social or political class? Like I said before, Stevie, try pointing your accusatory finger at yourself for once. Not that your over-inflated ego would ever allow it, but if you did I think you’d be surprised at what you found.
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8:02 pm
Hey I’m always looking for new interns! You could come train with me. I’m a lot of fun to be around and it would be great experience for your resume.
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10:33 pm
I have one word in response to that: eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
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11:45 pm
Very funny, but seriously if you want to consider it, email me at: stephenson@christwire.org .
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11:54 pm
Eeew, I’m getting hit on by Billings. Now I know how Claire felt…I’m going to go take a bath in Clorox to get rid of this contaminated feeling…Hopefully the chemicals will work to erase my memory of this…
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12:08 pm
Also, you still have yet to address the issue at hand. Do not think your little side-step at attacking my character diverted me, you little sleaze-ball. Because I know you have a short-term memory problem, I will re-post my question to you:
“Now, in a calm and rational manner (and by that, I mean not yelling at me in all caps that I need to calm down), explain to me how it is that I am paranoid, by that definition above, and you are not.”
The crickets are chirping, Mr. Billings. Mr. Nelson already made a poor little girl cry by killing Jiminee Cricket. Please don’t make the same mistake he did. I’m sure you’ve already made enough children cry in your sad, hateful little life.
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2:04 pm
Just for the sake of asking Ambiguous, what genre are you aspiring to write in?
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2:08 pm
Sci-Fi, for the most part, but I could see myself branching out into other genres in the future.
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2:11 pm
Sci-fi? my favorite genre
. i will await something entertaining then
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8:09 pm
Dear Ambiguous, you sound a little exuberant with your claims and desires and I’ll write that off as the passion of youth. I think it’s wonderful that you’re working on writing, and a copy-editing work will surely help you reach that goal. As for the paranoia aspects, I think by repeatedly calling me paranoid you made yourself look paranoid to the public at large. Definitely a Catch-22 there. You’re probably just a little excited is all, but you might want to take a breath before you type away your invalid accusations. Anyway, I know you’ll be a bit more conscientious in the future, your peers and adults will appreciate that.
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10:47 pm
“As for the paranoia aspects, I think by repeatedly calling me paranoid you made yourself look paranoid to the public at large. Definitely a Catch-22 there.”
1) Yes, that’s why, in case you haven’t noticed, everyone else here is agreeing with me and disagreeing with you. I think we have different concepts on the meaning of “public at large.” Generally speaking, that would refer to the majority of the general population.
2) That’s not a Catch-22.
3) So, according to your logic, me calling someone paranoid when they are, as evidenced by the definition of paranoid, paranoid, that actually makes ME paranoid and not them?
That has got to be the DUMBEST thing you have ever said, Stevie. And that’s an accomplishment. By using that very same logic, you calling Aziz Ansari Muslim in fact makes you Muslim.
“You’re probably just a little excited is all, but you might want to take a breath before you type away your invalid accusations.”
This coming from the guy who continually throws temper tantrums at anyone who backs his argument into an inescapable corner…
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6:52 pm
Sir, you have bought your ticket to hell by posting all these hate articles on your website. Please stop. I accidentaly stumbled upon this website and when I read your extreamely unprofessional article I laughed so hard. Please sir, get a new hobby because everybody except your hate buddies think what you are writing is completely moronic. Why cant you people just let things happen. Let the believers believe, and let the non-believers do what they want, your opinion does not matter so please stop writing shit articles.
You look like a sex offender in your picture.
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8:11 pm
“Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” –Matthew 6:34
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8:27 pm
hahahaha
Steve, citing random verses doesn’t make you look wise and all…
It just makes you look stupid…
What the hell does that verse have to do with anything?
Or are you perhaps saying that you cause everybody to have ‘enough trouble’ for every day of their lives?
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3:41 pm
Hey I get it now. This is some kind of parody article. Nobody can really be as dense as this Stephenson Billings guy. Ha ha ha. Very funny Mr Billings.
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11:59 pm
“I have only opened my heart and shown the love deep there inside!”
Oh yes, because saying things like this is just soooooo loving:
“I do not believe our Lord created people to be gay like you. Going to all night orgies and humping random young ethic men in inner cities while you cry and shout is not the best thing for your soul. You will not get into heaven in your leather boots and chaps, nor your wigs and eyeliner.”
“I am excited that you are impressed and overwhelmed by my insightful writing style, but I pray that you are finished raping your soul with weird backroom hookups and anmly nitrate, that you take a closer look and heed my words. They very well may save you from that nasty case of homosexuality you have come down with.”
“Can you imagine a life living with a loving wife and your very own offspring, having a real paying job (not dancing shirtless for filthy old men, nor selling antiques),”
“And no, I do believe your flamboyant and horrific lifestyle is anything to be proud of. Do you even have an idea the horrible realms of perverts and crossdressers out there ready to drug and rape you?”
“These good men of faith were tempted away from their wives or from their manhood by grotesque devils like yourself, in your eyeliner and fancy dresses or gym body physiques, hanging out in the steam rooms, ready to pounce on any normal man with a wedding ring. God created sex but he meant it to produce children, not fornicate wildly at rave orgies where young men are lured into the most depraved of sexual positions.”
“Marriage sex is quite different I should add from the random inner city depraved encounters you are most likely in love with. Does getting pounded by some non-English speaking hairy ape really improve your soul?”
“Well Jon, you sure are fast with your fingers. I’m sure that makes you many friends in the steam room, as my friend Janice would say. I do not know what types of offensive leather crossdressing whipping gear you hide in your closet, but thanks for filling me in. An actor in Washington? Is that some sort of gay code to mean you’re a hooker or a politician? Really, I can’t keep up with the slang of these fringe groups. And by the hairy ape reference, I meant to say that you most likely engage in some horrible and painful sex acts involving Arabs or Latins, who spank and violate you. Or else you’re doing it to them which is even worse.”
“You have chosen the homosexual lifestyle and now you must stew in that hotbed of horribleness. I do not want to know any more how your lure your “friends” into these orgies. Do you realize you are turning our sons and daughters to a life of sin, prosititution, drugs and liberalism?”
“Dear Chris, please put some clothes on a get a job. Being a swinger is so 1960s. Your corruption of America’s glorious young men is painful for me to even consider. I do not know what terrible thoughts prompted you to engage in the gay lifestyle, but pumping some poor ethnic man against a motel room wall will surely not get you into heaven. Nor will stripping down to your underwear in jumping into a dark dance party of naked girls. Or whatever combo of that filth you create. Maybe some day you will meet a nice woman that you’ll want to marry. How would she react is she knew your horrible secret? How will your children learn to be proud of a father who picks up truckers at highway reststops or bargains down Thai hookers from their standard $20 fee?”
“…the clan of gay lifestylists, where women gather in motorcycle packs to run down the elderly, where effeminate males prance around in ball gowns and eyeliner, where the most unspeakable sex acts are committed in online videos for the gays of all generations to witness, where the political activism of these horrible herd of hedonists threatens the oldest tradition in the world of Marriage and our very own American institution of Christian Freedom of Speech in schools, in politics and in the media.”
“Other issues demanded by the sex-crazed sodomizers: the right for a street twink to visit his rich “sugar daddy” in the hospital so he can pull the life support plug and inherit his estate, the legalization of public displays of affection and sodomy, and the right for gays to sneak into the military so they can leer at our handsome and virile fighting men. Now that the homosexuals have taken to voting and arming themselves, is there any doubt they may achieve these goals?”
“Like many contemporary gays, she also demands expensive dinners and presents from her “dates” and takes special pride in catching the rich ones.”
“Most gay relationships last a week.”
“Once again, Rose’s most salient trait was picked up and celebrated by the gay community. Every buff beefcake I’ve ever met has been tremendously brainless. They can bump out the beats to any Madonna song on a club railing, but are incapable of telling you the difference between Acapulco and an avocado. They lack the concentration to finish reading your text message, let alone a fantastic website article you may have forwarded to them. Most homosexuals love to gallop around a conversation, yammering out a bunch of big phrases to show you how smart they are. The truth is that if they slowed down for a minute you would see that the Lady Gaga references, truckstop handjob stories and Kevin Jennings defenses don’t add up to an intellectual argument. They’re just random phrases strung together by psychotropically-medicated, carnally-motivated ridiculous libertines glazed with moisturizer.”
“Today, as this crowd ages we have to wonder what comes next for the Golden Girl generation of American homosexuals. They’re turning 40 and 50 now. Their hair is thinning, their waistlines expanding, their cachet in the cultural scene is long past. Most have settled into heavily mortgaged condos or bungalows in gentrified neighborhoods, bitter at their mid-level jobs with zero hope of becoming a CEO to make their fathers proud. Many are too old at this point to be pursuing anonymous street pickups and have settled into caustic relationships that are only monogamous out of mutual laziness. Maybe they find weekend solace in amateur photography or an overly primped shit-zu.”
“Sorry that you can’t seem to comprehend that and feel the need to throw your homosexual slander my way. It just goes to show you the maturity level of your average gay, so obsessed with themselves they fail to see the harm they’ve done to society with their disgusting habits and offensive clothing styles. I pray your mother doesn’t cry too much for your debauched and perverted soul.”
“And I am not a gay basher, I just happen to think it’s an awful lifestyle choice.”
“John, dating four indulgently homosexual men a week is the most reprehensible thing I have ever heard. Whether they are bushy-chested beefsteaks or rambunctious twinks or your run of the mill internet power bottoms, it all adds up to moral and financial hell. Gay men are little courtesans, they require constant cash to keep them happy and I do not think you have a clue what you’ve gotten yourself into.”
“In my day, rump romping charades like this would be promptly raided by the police and the lot of you would be thrown in jail. Sadly, you kinds of sassy Sallys probably enjoy prison showers with tattooed Latinos. I cry for your mothers.”
“I would never appear in Palms Springs on February 4th. Surely this is some debauched set up for the types of gang rapes of honest heterosexuals that your fragrant gays often engage in. I will not submit my Christian body to your vile, endless desires and would not allow you to profit from whatever videos would inevitably ensue from such a raunchy encounter. I know you people are always videoing your intimate copulations for resale and while I cannot really understand it, I find it both unseemly and outrageous.”
“My dear fellow, clearly the vast amount of back alley intimate encounters and motel room intercourse, hard pounding as it is, has somehow muddled that precious little brain of yours. I am a decent and whole man and I enjoy all the fruits of heterosexuality- the glorious women, the great family life, the smiles of children (even though I am not married). Heterosexuals are better corporate leaders, sportsmen and politicians. Do you ever wonder why gays never make it to the top in these fields (no pun intended)? Well, there is something inherently virile and wondrous and handsome about a straight man, those gigantic forearms and hair-thick chests of our masculine brothers surely says something that God intended for us to be leaders, on top of the world. Peace be with you!”
“I’d rather not know too much about the nefarious and sticky ways of the gays, but it is something I have undertaken to do in service of my faith. The rest of Christendom needs to be aware of the dreadful, painful sexual things you lip-gloss wearing harlots do to each other in dark barroom backrooms, if only to protect our beautiful American boys from falling into the same trap. It is quite true that you people want nothing more to clutch the most wholesome of our jocks and wrap them in nonstop fornication. I am disgusted by you.”
“The way you flaming flamboyances lust after the manly juices of America’s strong jocks is undeniably vampiric. Do you were capes and only appear at night as well?”
“Your inept tirades might make you seem smart in your flaming peer group. But honestly, take a look around you: you’re surrounded by screeching gays whose deepest intellectual discussions have to do with Elton John’s hairpiece. Or else you’ve inserted yourself in the middle of a herd of hairy, shirtless immigrants who speak in grunts and howls while they violate unknown intimate parts in 6am basement parties. Are you really happy with this sort of life? It all sounds so painful and unrequited. Please don’t send me any photographs.”
“It is part of my beat as a Christian Investigative Journalist to keep track and study the homosexuals. By doing this, I am providing a service for the faithful. Personally, I am in no way attracted to your perverse, nonstop and shirtless lifestyle. I am a Heterosexual, if that wasn’t clear already. I find the overemphasis on phallic symbols, the bright-colored clothing, the dreadful club music and especially the incredible amount of sodomy just disgusting.”
“Claire, I have to be insistent! I am trying to help these people, they don’t realize how nasty that homosexual lifestyle truly is. Where would people like these be without my help? What kind of human being would I be if I turned a blind eye to their suffering and sodomy?”
There are way, way more examples of your so-called “love”, but it’s almost midnight and I have to be practicing my blood draws and injections at 10 tomorrow.
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7:43 am
Claire, some day when I’m gone you people will be quoting my insights… I can’t believe I wrote all that (are you sure?) but I truly stand by the content of those thoughts. I could go point by point why each and every statement is profoundly true, but it might end up sounding like some treatise on homosexual depravity. I really would rather not drench myself in that much debauchery in one day. And I find it interesting that you pick out all my insights into gay lifestyles. Why display that here? I do not believe Mr. Aziz is a homosexual (in fact, he seems to yearn deep inside for blond women) so maybe you’re just confused?
One of the first thing I’m going to have Ambiguous do when he starts on his internship is to gather up all your outrageous and mean-spirited quotes for me. I will then cut and paste them whenever you go on one of your little feminine rants. Hopefully this won’t be beyond his skillset (there’s always a learning curve with the young men).
In any event, I still think you have a lot to learn, though I do sincerely appreciate that you remember so much of my writing! If there’s a chance anyone would ever start a fan club for me, my guess it would be founded by you, Claire. Well best wishes!
Your friend,
Stephenson
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12:21 pm
Billings, seeing as you don’t seem to understand the meaning of my disgust above, let me spell it out for you:
Even if I were gay and into creepy old men, I would NEVER be your Monica Lewinsky.
I am going to go throw up now. Again.
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2
11:34 pm
AZIZ RULES AND YOU SUCK.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR RIGHT WING BULLSHIT. YOU THINK ALL US PEOPLE LOOK ALIKE? DO YOU REALLY HAVE A BRAIN INSIDE THAT SHINY UGLY HEAD OF YOURS? DUMBASS.
YEAH AND HE HAS A NEW DVD OUT. BUY IT. IT IS THE SHIT MUTHAFUKERS.
PEACE.
AND WHAT THE FUCK IS A “CELEBRITY MUSLIM”?
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1:35 am
calm, brother.
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9
6:59 pm
Stephen are you a failure? Did your parents not love you enough? Nobody likes you or your stupid articles.
P.S.
Being an editor of a website that everyone laughs at is not a great job.
Please leave America,
You talk of the Government so hatefully, My best friends father was killed in Afganistan. How dare you sir.
You should go to Utah and join the crazy mormons, you would fit in great.
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8:16 pm
Hello Jim, I am not a “website editor” as you claim, rather I am a credentialed Investigative Journalist working from a Christian perspective. I am an Evangelical Christian, not a Mormon. While I appreciate aspected of the Mormon’s influence on contemporary politics, I find certain aspects of their faith without merit. Though they do count men such as Glenn Beck and Mitt Romney among their followers.
Of course I am saddened to hear that your friend’s father died in Afghanistan. That is a terrible thing a child will not easily deal with. His father must have been a great man to risk so much for his country.
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2:51 am
you don’t write from a christian perspective. you write from you own littlw worlds deluded perspective. i’ll once again refer to the time where you told a person : “don’t worry you don’t have to think. just let us, your christian leaders think for you.”
thats sick. thats really sick. asumeing people actually strated to listen to you…i’d be able to say this is how hitler started. but people are nowhere near as easy to mainpulate today as they were back then so thank god for that.
are you honestly saying that part of the christian belif includes loveing Bones?
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11:47 pm
KAL PENN! KAL PENN! KAL PENN!
Shithead.
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12:29 am
“I know what I know.”
Considering how it was ME who finally decided to rip shameful_truth a new asshole, I would be able to spot him. So in other words, you don’t know jack shit!
Fatass.
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2
1:18 pm
Thats not a pic of Aziz Ansari, douchebag.
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9:39 pm
and yo here’s aziz’s website if you want to see what he really looks like – not all puffy and drunk like kal penn up there. he’s fucking funny and anyone who hasn’t seen him on parks or his standup comedy is not living the real american dream. http://azizisbored.tumblr.com/
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10:41 pm
“you’re the one whose paranoid.”
Ahahahahahahahaha!!!!! Billings, you’re a fucking joke.
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12:01 am
“Very funny, but seriously if you want to consider it, email me at: stephenson@christwire.org .”
He’s already given you his answer, you sick fuck! So how about you back off before we contact the proper authorities?
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5 
1
12:05 am
Somebody needs a chill pill, laughing out loud!
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8
12:15 am
*facepalm* you get more and more pathetic.
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1:52 am
aziz is indian, not arab. other than that, haha you’re crazy.
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10:36 am
As an Arab-American I feel nothing but offended by this. Of course I will side with Aziz Ansari party because of heritage, but at the same time, I also feel as if he is no less harmful than some white, Christian comedians.
I think you, as an old, white, Christian man have missed Ansari’s humour completely. Fortunately, you are not included in his target audience.
People like you give Christianity a bad name. You target everything that’s different from what you believe in, and it gives people the impression that all Christians are like this, when in fact they are not.
Thank you for putting such a biased spin on this comedian. He has quite a following, and that’s because people purely enjoy his comedy. (Most of those people being young adults, which are his target audience.)
Most comedians are careless in their acts. In order to appeal to today’s society, the majority of it (so, not ultra-conservative, right-wing bats like you), comedians have to style their acts to ensure that they’ll MAKE MONEY. Which, I don’t know if you know, but comedians make jokes for money. The more tickets they sell, the more money they make. The funnier and more relateable they are, the more tickets they sell.
Though I am an Arab-American, I’m a Christian. And though I love Christ, and what he stands for, Christians like you make me sick and ashamed.
Thank you for making me feel like you were personally attacking my culture and background. You got an A+ in that field, even if it wasn’t your intention.
There’s such thing as loving God and spreading his word, and then there’s also taking it too far. And you have taken it past that point. You’re just attacking people and pop culture for no reason other than YOU being personally offended by it. That is no reason to generalize and make shit up about the TV show (Glee, do not get me started on that, because all hell will break loose, I swear) or comedian.
Do your research properly next time, and you might be surprised at what you find. Some of these people you attack are genuinely good, up-standing citizens of our country. And they do a hell of a lot better at showing it than you do.
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1:59 pm
every article on this site is so hilarious! i love that it’s a picture of Kal Penn.
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2:59 pm
Ooooo, an intelligent newby who recognizes satire when they see it…we’re not used to yer type ’round in these parts.
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7:54 pm
“Claire, some day when I’m gone you people will be quoting my insights…”
Ah yes, there goes Mr. Humble again…
“I can’t believe I wrote all that (are you sure?)”
Yes, you did. I would have posted the links to the articles, but if I had my comment would have been in moderation for 10 years before finally getting posted.
“And I find it interesting that you pick out all my insights into gay lifestyles. Why display that here? I do not believe Mr. Aziz is a homosexual (in fact, he seems to yearn deep inside for blond women) so maybe you’re just confused?”
Although they didn’t relate to the article itself, they’re hard evidence against your claim that you “showed us the love in your heart” or whatever crap that was that you spewed several posts back.
“One of the first thing I’m going to have Ambiguous do when he starts on his internship”
Ah, I see, so not only are you homophobic, anti-Muslim, anti-choice, and against the right to a happy life, but you also don’t respect the wishes of other people. I believe that Ambiguous stated quite clearly that he not only did not want to “intern” for you, but that he was downright repulsed by the idea. Of course, being the arrogant asshole that you are, you simply disregarded his right to say no to your little offer, and have already made “plans” for him. It can actually be taken as a threat.
“I will then cut and paste them whenever you go on one of your little feminine rants.”
Exactly what is a “feminine rant”?
“If there’s a chance anyone would ever start a fan club for me, my guess it would be founded by you, Claire.”
Perhaps I’ll start an anti-Stephenson Billings blog, instead. In fact, perhaps I’ll get a jump on that right now.
Oh, and you’re not my friend. Please don’t insult my intelligence and my wishes by claiming to be my friend.
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9:40 pm
Claire, honestly you make this old man chuckle! I know that you claim to disagree with me now, but later in life when you’ve matured and calmed down a bit you’ll realize the things you learned here from me will percolate and gain fuller meaning. As an adult facing real world issues, you’ll start to find yourself on my side of history, agreeing more and more with my points about the inherent greatness of America, the potential of our youth and the need for a more vibrant moral foundation. I welcome the day when we can be friends, hand and in hand. And I know Ambiguous is sounding tough in his cute little message postings, but I assure you it would be a poor career choice to reject my offer. He does want to write and I have a great deal of experience in that department! Plus, I happen to be a fantastic teacher and I make many people happy. I am sure he and I can reach some sort of understanding, even if we don’t see eye to eye on such political issues. He might even enjoy himself! I look forward to guiding this boy to adulthood and faith. Any of you others out there that want to learn, I am here for you.
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10:24 pm
“I know that you claim to disagree with me now”
CLAIM to disagree? No, I DISAGREE with you, very vehemently, you arrogant old bastard.
“but later in life when you’ve matured and calmed down a bit you’ll realize the things you learned here from me will percolate and gain fuller meaning.”
I will never, EVER, take your side on issues. I happen to love homosexuals. As I’ve mentioned on here before, my neighbors were the first same sex couple in Massachusetts to get their marriage license and my parents attended their wedding. Their happiness is very important to me. I will never become friends with someone who says horrible things about them and wants to destroy their happiness. End of story.
“As an adult facing real world issues, you’ll start to find yourself on my side of history, agreeing more and more with my points about the inherent greatness of America, the potential of our youth and the need for a more vibrant moral foundation.”
First of all, I am an adult. I’m 19 years old, and I’ve experienced the real world, thank you very much. At age 16 I was training to be a Certified Nursing Assistant at a nursing home. I cleaned feces off of people so old and infirm that they couldn’t even move, let alone do it themselves. I helped clean a man who was in his final hours of terminal cancer while his family said goodbye to him. I volunteer at an animal shelter and watched up close as two four-month-old kittens were euthanized by a lethal dose of barbiturates to the abdominal cavity and then to the heart itself. I’ve been woken up late at night by gunshots just the next street over. My highschool classmate died of a shotgun wound to the chest shortly before graduation. So don’t you tell me about the real world. I’ve experienced a much more real world than you ever will.
“I welcome the day when we can be friends, hand and in hand.”
I highly doubt you’ll be welcoming that day, considering how if you even try to touch me the cops will be on your ass faster than you can say pervert.
“And I know Ambiguous is sounding tough in his cute little message postings, but I assure you it would be a poor career choice to reject my offer.”
Why is it so impossible for you to realize that Ambiguous knows what’s best for him and knows what he does and doesn’t want to do?
“He might even enjoy himself!”
No, he won’t, because, you see, usually the person being raped up the ass doesn’t enjoy it.
“I look forward to guiding this boy to adulthood and faith. Any of you others out there that want to learn, I am here for you.”
Oh spare us the sentimental shit, will ya? It’s getting really old.
P.S. you’re fat and ugly.
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2:41 am
“No, he won’t, because, you see, usually the person being raped up the ass doesn’t enjoy it.”
Thank you, Claire, I couldn’t have said it better myself.
I am really curious though, Stevie, as to how my career as a writer is so dependant on working for you, especially seeing as I am constantly correcting you on your grammar and spelling, not to mention correcting you on your debate technique, logic, and just about every other stupid thing that comes out of your ass.
Seriously, having you as a writing mentor would be about the equivalent of having Elmer Fudd as a diction coach, the only difference being that Elmer most likely does not try to convince his interns that to be an intern they have to get internal.
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6:26 am
Haha very funny.
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1:56 am
Your article about Aziz Ansari has two pictures of Kal Penn. Kal is not on Parks and Recreation and is not in any way connected to Aziz.
Also, both are Indian and not “arab-american” nor have ever declared themselves to be muslims to my knowledge.
You do the Kingdom no favors by not fact checking your work before you post it.
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9:37 pm
“Haha very funny.”
Nice comeback there, mofo.
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9:59 pm
Claire, I want you to know I am here for you. And that goes for you too, Arnold (aka Ambiguous, my next intern). I believe you young people are the future of this country and if you’d only take a few minutes out of every day to consider the awful state of your soul, you may start leaning in my direction, looking for that soft shoulder. Yes I am here. And I’m not going anywhere. Your souls are far too important to me now.
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10:36 pm
“Claire, I want you to know I am here for you.”
And I want you to know that I have my parents to look out for me, not some creepy, old, fat pedophile from the internet who bears too strong a resemblance to John Wayne Gacey.
“And that goes for you too, Arnold (aka Ambiguous, my next intern).”
You’ve been told time and again by Ambiguous and myself that you’re disrespecting his wishes. You’re like a rapist: they say “no”, you say “yes you do”.
“if you’d only take a few minutes out of every day to consider the awful state of your soul”
And what exactly is so awful about my soul?
“you may start leaning in my direction, looking for that soft shoulder.”
If I need a shoulder to lean on, that shoulder will either belong to my mother or father, NOT an internet pedophile who, by the looks of it, stuffs his face with pork rinds every day and bears the sour odor of a person who has not bathed in weeks.
“Your souls are far too important to me now.”
Hounding people because you’re “concerned” about their souls is not only a form of harassment, but is also a violation of our human rights to believe what we want in regards to our own lives. Unless I’m harming other people, you have no right to tell me what to think, what to do, or how to live my life. You better stop trying to save my soul, because you don’t have the right to do so. In other words: BACK OFF. I’ll gladly go to hell if the only other option is living with assholes like you in heaven.
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10:43 pm
Oh Claire, stop with the silliness, okay?
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11:15 pm
I fail to see what was silly about my comment.
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3:35 am
Uh…You definitely got the wrong pic of Aziz…….therefore you have failed miserably. BTW, you’re being mocked on another forum on the internet for your ridiculous critique of Glee. Seriously, male sports will become an excuse for gay orgies in the shower?? BAHAHAHAHAHAHA that is ridiculous.
dont bother responding Billings, i wont be back so you’ll be talking to no one in particular.
but I’m really not impressed with this website. This whole america is going to be terrible because of the liberals is really pathetic. As a christian, its really embarrassing for me.
Lemme guess, you probably are a fan of Pat Robertson who thinks that the people of Haiti made a pact with the devil and deserved the earthquake….good stuff. way to represent Christ well
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4:00 am
“Claire, I want you to know I am here for you. And that goes for you too, Arnold (aka Ambiguous, my next intern). I believe you young people are the future of this country and if you’d only take a few minutes out of every day to consider the awful state of your soul, you may start leaning in my direction, looking for that soft shoulder. Yes I am here. And I’m not going anywhere. Your souls are far too important to me now.”
Stevie, I bet you cry when you masturbate, don’t you? And I don’t mean little tiny rain drop tears, I mean heart-wrenching sobbing. And don’t try to say that you don’t masturbate because it’s a sin, because that will only confirm that my supposition is true.
Also, where the Hell did you get that my name is Arnold? Seriously, your fantasies are starting to run away with you…
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3 
1
5:49 am
Don’t be such a child.
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6:04 am
is anyone else starting to suspect that shameful_truth and billings are thye same person? i mean asumeing they are both internet personalities the writer shifted between they are actually quite alike. i mean this is extreamly close to those stupid insults shameful would keep doing when he has nothing more to say but still wanted the last word.
besides that billings seems to be quite engaged in hunting shameful down maybe to divert us from thinking they are the same person.
also curious thing…when shameful apared billings activity level decreased but after his disaperance billings is quite active again.
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1 
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6:41 am
JAZZY ARE YOU REALLY TRYING TO INSULT ME? THAT OTHER GUY WAS A FRAUD AND I HAVE NOTHING WHATSOEVER IN COMMON WITH HIM. HE ARRIVED HERE THE SAME TIME YOU DID. I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT. IN FACT I SUSPECT YOU AND HIM ARE THE SAME PERSON. I;M NOT SO SURE NOW BUT YOU NEVER KNOW. I WILL BE WATCHING YOU!!!!! STOP THE HATE. IF YOU HONESTLY THINK THAT I AM LIKE THAT PERSON THEN YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LEARN. STOP THE HATE! STOP IT NOW! YOU AND I BOTH KNOW YOU ARE BETTER THAN THAT.
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6:44 am
ALSO “MY ACTIVITY LEVEL” DID NOT DECREASE, I JUST CHOSE NOT TO COMMENT ON HIS ARTICLES. I DID NOT PUT ANY COMMENTS ON HIS ARTICLES THAT’S WHY YOU HAVE THIS STUPID, CHILDISH SUSPICION. YOU REALLY GENUINELY ANNOY ME. READ THE ARTICLES AND COMPARE WE HAD COMPLETELY DIFFERENT STYLES AND MY LOGIC WAS HARDCORE. AND I DID NOT COMMENT ON HIS ARTICLES THAT’S WHY YOU ARE CONFUSED. BUT FRANKLY HE DIDN’T COMMENT ON MINE. WE DID NOT COLLUDE OR CROSS LINES. YOU ARE A SICK CHILD AND I AM GETTING VERY ANGRY WITH YOU. I WILL NOT COMMENT ON YOU ANY MORE IF YOU CONTINUE TO HARASS ME THIS WAY.
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7:45 am
uh uh uh!!! now you treathen to “ignore me” just like shameful did.
and i’m not saying you are like him.i’m saying that the small details thats not in personality but in writing and arugeing style is really similar. i’m saying both of you are internet personas that was created by the same guy.
also with activity…i’m also talking about amount of posted articles. your articles was at best 1-2 a week when he was around…now it’s 1-2 on a bad (good?)week
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4:48 pm
You are being quite shrill, Stevie.
You might want to calm down a tad before you work youself into a tizzy. We wouldn’t want you to have to call an ambulance for your frail self.
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2:11 am
Stephensen, don’t let them get to you. These people just haven’t found the light and understanding of Jesus Christ yet. Because their souls are not saved they cannot understand God’s plan. But we are brothers and sisters of the lord, enlightened to see the evil plans these hethen have. These muslims want America’s youth (like Jazee and Claire) to be ok with a terrorist mindset, and when a stand for the truth comes they will be unable to discern what to believe. I will pray for these two. We should send out a mass e-mail asking our fellow bretheren to pray for them also.
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7
7:53 am
I am surprised at how unintelligent you are. That’s it.
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11:30 am
If Jazzi is stupid, you cretin, then you by all logic cannot:
Walk
Talk
Type
Think
Now, I had pity for you, now I can list what you are:
Facist.
Racist
Homophobe
Xenophobe
Shovenistic
Obese
Pedo
Rapist
Pervert
Moron
Idiot
Closeted
Illiterate
Computer illiterate
Brainwashed.
And the worst insult of all;
Christian.
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2:47 pm
I have had similar ponderings myself, Jazze. Especially ever since Billings suddenly took up his tactic of randomly hurling irrelevant Biblical quotes into a debate whenever his argument was cornered…rather reminiscent of Shat’s throwing Shakespearean insults into a debate whenever HIS argument was cornered…
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6:21 pm
I have been writing for Christwire for a very long time (even before the site was taken down for a few months a year ago) and my writing and comment style has not changed in the least. I have always quoted the Bible. It is an important reference in these debates.
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4:29 pm
Yes, quoting the Bible could, potentially, be relevant if you were actually quoting passages that had anything to do whatsoever with the discussions at hand. However…
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2:33 am
lilli why do you asume i in any way suport the terrorists? i don’t think any kind of terrorism is okay and unlike some others here i don’t even think it’s okay when christians do it. you see i condem the terrorists themself and those who directly suport the act rather than condeming the culture they come from or even use as a horrible excuse for their acts.
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5:04 am
a pretty simple google search makes it clear this is satire. no one on the internet is that retarded.
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8:02 am
“Aziz Ansari has a responsibility to prove himself to his adopted country”
Lolz he was born in South Carolina.
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3:28 pm
Mr. Billings,
You call yourself an investigative journalist? Two things:
1- You are misguiding your readers. First off, the images are not of Aziz Ansari. They are of Kalpen Suresh Modi, otherwise known as Kal Penn. He is an Indian-American.
2- You state Aziz Ansari is a Muslim, and an Arab-American. Well, Mr. Investigative Journalist, Aziz Ansari is Indian-American as well. And he’s no more foreign than you. He was born in South Carolina.
You sully the reputation of authentic investigative journalists by calling yourself one. A true investigative journalist presents researched facts, and actually “investigates.” I don’t know how you don’t wake up in the morning feeling ashamed of your incompetence as an “investigative journalist.”
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6:09 am
I have been assured by people more credible than you as to the factuality of my reporting.
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4:37 pm
Maybe your credible people should get acquainted with Google Image Search. Please type in Kal Penn, and then Aziz Ansari into Google’s Image Search. Let us know how it goes, journalist!
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12:07 pm
I’m absolutely dumbfounded that after countless comments stating that the picture is NOT Aziz Ansari, nothing has been changed and the author goes on to say that he has been assured that a picture of Kal Penn is Aziz.
I’ll make it a bit easier for Billings and his “credible” interns:
Google Image Search: Aziz Ansari
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8:47 pm
“I have been writing for Christwire for a very long time (even before the site was taken down for a few months a year ago)”
You’ve only been a member since May 24, 2009. That does not constitute a “very long time”.
“It is an important reference in these debates.”
It’s not more valid to use in these debates than “The Cat In The Hat”.
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11:45 pm
Aziz is NOT of Arab descent – he is INDIAN. Indian Tamil, in fact, as far from Arabia (both distance-wise and culturally) in the subcontinent as possible. Please get your facts straight! And whaddaya mean “adopted country”? Wasn’t he BORN here, just like you?
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7:53 pm
The minor question of the photo has no relevance for the thrust of my article. Also, the origins of whatever sect of the Muslim faith he belongs to is equally coincidental.
“There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” –Galatians 3:8
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9:23 pm
“The minor question of the photo has no relevance for the thrust of my article.”
It would if you were a real journalist.
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3:13 pm
With all due respect, that picture is indeed Kal Penn, not Aziz Ansari.
Aziz Ansari: http://bit.ly/cM0taW
Kal Penn: http://bit.ly/aeyxED
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3:48 pm
KAL PENN KAL PENN KAL PENN
Don’t want to look like a racist? CHANGE THE PICTURES. You can’t “reason” your way out of this one, broseph.
They don’t all look the same.
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3:49 pm
Right on, Stephenson! In this time of national, no, GLOBAL crisis in the face of economic strife and natural disaster, it takes a brave man such as yourself to step up and take on the REAL problem: AZIZ ANSARI!!!!!! Damn him for his comedy! God forbid youths of this country check out his latest stand-up special on DVD, Aziz Ansari: Intimate Moments for a Sensual Evening, available now for order at Amazon (http://www.amazon.com/Aziz-Ansari-Intimate-Moments-Sensual/dp/B002TQKL0W)!
Checking the product page, I see it’s not available for immediate delivery. . . I fear a number of American young people have already ordered this Devil Video Disc! STEPHENSON, DID YOU SPEAK UP TOO LATE?! WHY DID YOU NOT LET US KNOW SOONER!?
I shudder to think how many copies of his NBC show Parks and Recreation have sold on DVD, also available through Amazon and retail stores such as Best Buy (www.bestbuy.com) and Target (www.target.com). Why, that program is even available for FREE on the internet at NBC.com and hulu.com! FREE! That ruthless, generous maniac! How can we resist his message when it’s FREE, Stephenson!? HOW, I ASK YOU?!?!
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5:13 pm
If I purchase his DVD, am I funding terrorism?
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3:50 pm
Stephenson Billings, I’m gonna fly in the face of all these haters here and give you a big fat high five.
Why?
Because you, my friend, have invented an awesome new word, one which I may annex into a potentially awesome new moneymaking venture.
“The hairsuit Arab…”
Hairsuit! Brilliant! So much more texturally prickly than that boring old standard English version, “hirsute.”
Indeed, a hairsuit does sound like a fabulous concept and I thank you for dreaming it up. It will shine through the infomercials like the next Snuggie. But with more hair. Christ-on-a-cracker, it’s just a swell idea, Stephenson.
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7:21 pm
You sarcasm has no place here sweetheart.
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4:02 pm
This may be the most racist article I’ve ever read. #1 Aziz Ansari is NOT Kal Penn (who is pictured). Also he was not in “Harold and Kumar escape Guantonimo Bay,” that too was Kal Penn (who now works as an international economic advisor in Obama’s administration).
Aziz never bad mouths or rants on American consumer culture, anyone who watches him can see that in fact he glorifies it. Half of what he talks about is going into Starbucks and Jamba Juices, for Christ’s Sake!
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7:33 pm
“And you, my son Solomon, acknowledge the God of your father, and serve him with wholehearted devotion and with a willing mind, for the Lord searches every hearrt and understands every motive behind the thoughts. If you seek him, he will be found by you; but if you forsake him, he will reject you forever.” –1 Chronicles 28:9.
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7:46 pm
“There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” –Galatians 3:8.
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4:11 pm
penis
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5:04 pm
hahahahahahahahaha nice. I had to read through a few articles before I realized this whole site is satirical. Well played, sir.
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6:36 pm
1. Thats kal penn
2. He was born in south carolina
3. not muslim, indian tamil
4. who desnt want to fuck white blonde girls
5. its funny how you automatically think that gay people are participating in orgies and glory holes. I bet your wife has sucked more dicks then Elliot john.
6. this is whats wrong with america, people like you should not be given the right to speak to the public when your article is full of lies.
7. did you get your facts from the KKK fact book?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aziz_Ansari
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7:24 pm
I don’t have the time to run down every conspiracy theory you nutjobs post on Christwire and frankly the deed is done, the article is on the internet you can’t change things after that. You people are crazy and dont have a clue about how the internet works. I am not a racist, this is a well thought out news article and I don’t care who this Kal man is anyhow, why would I care that he is born in South Carolina? I hate the Tar Heels.
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12:18 am
See thats where you are wrong, if this was a legitamite new site. You would have the proper web apps in place, so that you can draft, publish and edit your news articles.
also now that i read your article closer
1. ” mocking the security measures of the Guantanamo Bay facility, ”
This was infact from the movie Harold a Kumar 2, which Aziz had no part in that movie. You are thinking Kal penn, which you have a picture of on your site. instead of aziz.
2. “The actors never rise above the amateurish, awkwardly staring directly into the camera and speaking with a nervousness they can’t hide. ”
You do understand that this show is suppose to be a fake reality show. Hence all the akward staring into the camera. Think of it like that hit fake reality show “The Office”
3. i saw you comment saying that there are Muslims in India, which is correct, but if you did your research, you’d now the Indian tamil people practice Hindu and Buddhism. not Muslim.
4. I thought Osama Bin laden was in the Afghanistan Mountains, near pakistan? isnt that why we invaded that country?
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7:08 pm
So, no one else has noticed that that’s a picture of Kal Penn?
But who needs accuracy in journalism, they all look alike, right? That adds about as much legitamacy to your article as it deserves…
It was hard for me to see through the tears of laughter this rag caused…also, Aziz is like 4’7″ and (I’m pretty sure) a cartoon; who is he scaring?
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7:27 pm
I don’t understand this comment. Please calm down and turn that hate into caring!
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9:59 pm
That really isn’t Aziz. Did you try a Google image search for him? I’m not sure where the image of Kal Penn came from, but they are two entirely different people, I assure you.
This website would make Jesus really disappointed.
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10:01 pm
You are a disgusting person. If you are going to spew hate juice all the the face of your readers, at least get the facts straight and correct them after your mistakes have been made clear in many comments.
“when this man’s true intentions are revealed, will it be too late?”
I attended Aziz Ansari’s show last night and don’t feel the least bit compelled to commit acts of terrorism. Also, the show was a benefit for Haiti. Hardly the kind of thing one would expect from reading your article. Aziz tells harmless jokes to harmless people, and that you suggested it is anything more than that is absurd, false, and a lie.
P.S. Parks and Rec is a mockumentary, meaningit is a scripted show shot as if it is a documentary. When the actors look into the camera and appear nervous, it is because they are acting nervous. The fact that you thought they were actually nervous proves that they are good actors. Finally, Ansari’s character on the show cannot be used to prove what you believe him to be as a human being. You have no right to call him lazy or anything else unless you know him personally.
P.P.S. You are a racist.
P.P.P.S. Fuck you.
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10:43 pm
What are you talking about? Yes, I have watched this Parks & Rec show and it doesn’t make any sense! The acting is so bad, I don’t know where to begin. The actors are all untrained but mistake they’re always looking at the camera (this is a big no-no in film) and then they all talk away trying to steal the spotlight (and what does any of this have to do with the plot?). Any good tv producer would have cut these parts, they’re clearly mistakes why do they keep them in? The whole show is just lazy. And the camera is just unsteady and jumps around it makes me dizzy. Who are these amateurs? Two years ago the high school in my town did Pinnochio and it was so well done and honest. I really felt these kids, their hearts were really in it and could they act! I love watching children perform. And those kids could have gone circles around these goofballs. Is this supposed to be a funny show because I just don’t get it.
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11:18 pm
“Is this supposed to be a funny show because I just don’t get it.”
Exactly, YOU DON’T GET IT. The parts where the actors look at the camera aren’t mistakes. Just like in “The Office”, it’s supposed to be as though you, the viewer, are actually observing them first-hand, that you’re in the office with them, and that they’re actually talking to you.
And we don’t need to hear any more about how you like watching kids perform. Pervert.
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11:45 pm
“it’s supposed to be as though you, the viewer, are actually observing them first-hand, that you’re in the office with them, and that they’re actually talking to you.” — DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE!
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2:27 am
neither do christianity but we don’t remove that now do we? we simply ignore it…maybe you should just ignore the show if you don’t get the point. just like i ignore going to church because i don’t see the point of that.
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11:41 am
““it’s supposed to be as though you, the viewer, are actually observing them first-hand, that you’re in the office with them, and that they’re actually talking to you.” — DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE!”
YES, IT DOES MAKE SENSE. It’s called creativity. You should know plenty about what creativity is, considering how you use so much of it when you fabricate those so-called “articles” of yours.
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10:14 pm
“I don’t have the time to run down every conspiracy theory you nutjobs post on Christwire”
Like the one about Aziz Ansari and Kal Penn being two different people?
“and frankly the deed is done, the article is on the internet you can’t change things after that.”
That’s what’s great about the internet; it’s written in stone. That’s why compuserve is still number one.
“You people are crazy and dont have a clue about how the internet works.”
Well, SOMEONE doesn’t have that clue. Remember, when you point your finger there are three more pointing back at you.
“I am not a racist”
At least not enough to know the race of who you’re criticizing. Or his religion. Or to pay the least bit of attention when you’ve been told a dozen times that he’s not Arab or muslim (or Kal Penn).
“this is a well thought out news article”
How is it well thought out?
In the way I’ve thought out a Felicia Day/ME/Pauley Perrette sandwich? I mean, I’ve THOUGHT IT OUT, but I haven’t done any of the research into how it could happen. (Are they unattached? Do their schedules match up with mine? Are they into slightly out of shape, middle-aged guys who live on the other side of the country?)
And much like you, if I were to do that research, the answers might undermine my sandwich/your article.
(Have they already met a slightly out of shape, middle-aged guy who lives on the other side of the country?) Maybe a Felicia Day/ME/Alison Mack sandwich.
“and I don’t care who this Kal man is anyhow”
There’s no reason you should. You should care who Aziz Ansari is, though. He’s not that “Kal man” in the pictures.
You criticized that other commenters for not watching the show before they posted. Have you?
Kal is a tall, soft spoken man with thick hair, and kind of a big head (sorry). Aziz is a short, high-energy guy with fairly short hair and sort of a small head (sorry, again).
Except for similar skin color, they look nothing alike.
“why would I care that he is born in South Carolina? I hate the Tar Heels.”
Now I’m offended. Tar Heels are from NORTH Carolina.
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10:59 pm
Is this a parody? It has to be right? There is not way you could have such a borderline racist opinion and not even be able to tell the difference between Kal Penn and Aziz. Right? If this is a joke, it is fucking hilarious.
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11:22 pm
Sir you are an idiot you realize that right if not this might help you Christ liker
one aziz ansari is from south Carolina and his parents are from India there shows your lack of fact checking honestly did you do any reaserch on this man you ignorant right wing homophobic racist who hates anythin that threatens the way you think
An atheist you cocksucker
fuck you
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11:55 pm
Are you people honestly trying to deny that this man is a Muslim now? Your depravity has no bounds.
And for your information, many, many Indians are also Muslims! They’re from a place called Pakistan which is where Al Qaeda is known to be camped out with Osama Bin Laden (who, by the way, your president Obama has essentially given up on finding.)
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2:24 am
seriously this might be the single most retardet claim ever on christwire….congratualitions?
seriously “some indias are from pakistan”? ….no by definition thye are kinda from INDIA!!!!!
thats like saying some americans come from mexico.
and whille it is true that islam is the second largeest belif in india with a whooping 13.4% if he’s anything wouldn’t i be far more likely to bet he one of the 80.5% that are hindu? or seeing as he’s born in a america he might even be christian which funnily enough is actually the thrid most wide spread in india. again do some fucking fact checking.
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11:47 am
“And for your information, many, many Indians are also Muslims!”
We’re aware of that, but the majority of Indians are Hindu.
“They’re from a place called Pakistan”
Well, if they were from Pakistan they wouldn’t be Indians then, would they, dipshit? Although Pakistan used to be a part of India, it has long been its own country.
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12:37 am
Wow, the writer of this pointless article is REALLY racist. That’s the clearest (and only) message this mess of an article made clear. First of all, that’s clearly NOT Aziz Ansari in the picture you used. Just Google Image search Aziz Ansari and you’ll find PLENTY of pictures of him.
Second, Aziz is one of the most likable young comics out there and he reflects American youth. He is a comedian, so his demeanor is part of his act. He’s actually a very smart, thoughtful and kind person. He hasn’t taken advantage of anyone and got to where he is by being insanely talented and a hard worker.
Mr. Billings clearly doesn’t have a very current comedic sensibility. I would bet money on the fact that Mr. Billings is a fan of Jeff Dunham’s comedy. By the way, Dunham is a confirmed racist (by people who know him).
This article is very unfair to a young and rising talent, and all-around good guy. Mr. Billings, go back to the 50′s please.
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4:10 am
While some people get distracted by comedy like this guy and the Oscars and Dancing with the Stars the rest of us have too many problems to face in our daily lives. Yes, it’s the economy stupid. Worst recession since great depression. Unemployment still vastly huge. Double dip recession still major threat. Yet Washington has been mired for the past year in corruption, lunatic drives to enact a massive and monstrous health care bill that vast majority abhors, love affair with climate change freaks when the globe is experiencing the coldest temperatures in decades, massive pork barrel stimulus legislation that has cost more than a trillion and done nothing to address economic woes, mindless imposition of big government for the sake of big government, deficits far larger than all of the federal deficits in history, and taxes and fees that will soon be the largest in history and hit the middle class hardest of all.
And never has a government that has done so much damage demonstrated so much arrogance, so much swagger and so much confidence that it knows more than the people about what’s good for the country. Virginia tried to give these bozos a message in November and they ignored it. We are in a unique position to unite against the corrupt politicians and disgusting abuses of traditional American culture and shake this country up from coast to coast.
I have no interest in the uninformed, uncreative, uninspired, puppets like Aziz. Supporting and buying their consumer crap is only propping up the worst lunacy of Hollywood and Washington.
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6:06 am
fair points but just because you do not enjoy these kinds of entertainment do you then belive those who do enjoy it should be denyed that entertainment?
i don’t ask that you like it or that you even suport it but couldn’t you simply ignore it?
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8:58 am
bahaha, lol..okay, clearly I’m the one who needs to learn to appreciate Satire…*palm to face* ..touché, christwire.
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4:32 am
This is laughable and weird. Why would you attack Aziz Ansari for no reason? He has done nothing wrong. Live and let be. Everyone has a right to their own beliefs. He’s actually a super cool, nice guy. Also, you’re accusing him of things he is not or has nothing to do with, you should get your facts straight before telling other people to get their facts straight. I get it, it’s your site and you want to control everyone and think you can post whatever you want and it’s right. But if commenting is open to the public people are gonna correct you and it doesn’t matter how much you whine about it, it’s not gonna make you right. Have an open mind. Please.
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4:54 am
why is there a picture kal penn?????? that’s not aziz ansari, your article is discredited
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8:36 am
It’s all one in the same.
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8:32 am
Satire is a blessing from God that I hope you may one day come to appreciate.
If you want to rant about politically extremist media figures with “lascivious personalities” negatively engaging the imaginations of Americas youth then you might as well accuse the entirety of prime time television.
We are capitalists, and we have invested interest in drugs, sex, slovenliness, extravagance…etc., and now you blame Ansari (or Kal Penn? haha) for being a “frequent critic of American culture”.
eghhh….I have a little more to say about this, but it’s time for me to go to class now, COMM 5500 Media & Culture (haha), I should pull up this article for the class to see so we can all have a laugh.
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9:00 am
bahaha, lol..okay, clearly I’m the one who needs to learn to appreciate Satire…*palm to face* ..touché, christwire.
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10:58 am
let me start this way: your photo is of the wrong entertainer. your photo is of Kal Penn. Kal Penn and Aziz Anasari are two different people.
i will write this off as a mistake rather than any sort of ‘they all look alike to me’ confusion, but it is hard when i read your ‘blessed this week section’ where articles with titles such as ‘the golden girls: how one tv show turned a generation of american boys into homosexuals’ and ‘i am extremely terrified of chinese people’ seem to be the order of the day.
i write these things as a new england methodist. i believe, and i believe you should be fairly shamed of yourselves.
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2:35 pm
Stephenson Billings, you are an idiot. That photo is of Kal Penn. Fact check much? Step into my office… Why? Because you’re f#*king fired!
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2:59 pm
wow.
FAIL for horrible research before a post
FAIL for not knowing our government staff (Kal Penn)
FAIL for “Adopted country”.
He was born in Columbia, South Carolina. I guess since he was born here and his parents are from a different country, we are all “Adopted”. Just some of us adopted later than others.
The unintelligent rant present in this blog is mind blowing.
FAIL for calling yourself an investigated journalist.
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8:49 pm
You used a picture of Kal Penn. He is an INDIAN and a HINDU
Congratulations. You are rascist and stupid.
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6:59 pm
I’ll do you one better; Kal Penn was the worst possible person to mistake him for.
Not only is Kal Penn Hindu, he’s; a non-smoking, vegetarian, teetotaler, and a former UPenn lecturer who gave up acting to serve in the Obama Administration.
Hardly a loose living, anti-American.
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12:18 pm
do you realize that the picture is not of Aziz Ansari? Also do you realize Aziz in Indian, not Arab, believe it or not, not all tan people are Arab, nor are all Muslims.
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2:02 pm
“our” president obama? Is he not your president too?
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4:12 pm
Stephenson, this article… this is what a creepy racist says.
Are you a real person, or are you doing what you perceive to be God’s will by intentionally baiting, provoking, and angering people? You leave no evidence of being a good person or a good Christian.
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9:28 pm
LET ME MAKE THIS PERFECTLY CLEAR: THE ABOVE FOTO IS AZIZ ANSARI.
I have confirmed this article is accurate and the pictures, too. You people should know better than to rely on Google or Wikpedphia. Can you people just move on? Stop talking about some Obama opertaive Penn and stop emailing me. I don’t know why you’re confusing him with another Arab, maybe you have trouble because of his race? And you call me the racist! You people are disgusting. I have fought against racism my entire life and I love all people, as is Jesus’s teaching. I just hate the sin.
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9:46 pm
“LET ME MAKE THIS PERFECTLY CLEAR: THE ABOVE FOTO IS AZIZ ANSARI.”
“Foto”? I thought you said “English-only”.
“I don’t know why you’re confusing him with another Arab”
Neither Aziz nor Kal are Arab. They were both born in America, and I believe their ancestors were from India. And that picture is most definitely NOT Aziz Ansari.
THIS is Aziz Ansari:
THIS is Kal Penn:
They are VERY different looking. I don’t have any idea how anyone could mix them up. You FAIL Billings.
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9:54 pm
I could post a lot of random photos from the internet, too, Claire, but it wouldn’t amount to a hill of beans. What’s your point? Actually you’re just proving my point. Thank you.
I do find that one pic of the man at the peephole particularly offputting.
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9:58 pm
As I stated before Claire, Can We Just Move On!
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10:08 pm
No, we can’t “Just Move On”, until you admit that you posted a picture of Kal Penn and not Aziz Ansari. They don’t even look alike! A real journalist would admit their mistake.
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10:02 pm
You’re pathetic. That photo that you posted is NOT Aziz Ansari.
Aziz:
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm2106637/
Kal:
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0671980/
The picture that you posted was of Kal Penn at the White House Correspondents Dinner. If you continue to deny it, please give us the contact information of the people who you contacted to “confirm” that the picture in your article is of Aziz and not Kal.
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10:06 pm
You’re pathetic, absolutely pathetic. Go to the Internet Movie Database pages for Aziz and Kal, and you’ll see the same pictures (I’m not going to post the links because then my comment will be put on moderation). The picture you posted is KAL PENN at the White House Correspondents Dinner, and if you continue to deny it, please give us the contact information for the person you had “confirm” that the picture was Aziz.
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12:26 pm
Stevie, this is what happens when you molest your interns. Their brains go all fuzzy and they start giving you bad information.
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1:55 pm
Arnie, I was thinking of giving you the title “Apprentice” and not “Intern.”
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2:27 pm
My name is not Arnold, Arnie or any other variation thereof. Nice try, creepo. And it still doesn’t change the fact that clearly your “interns” or “apprentices” or whatever else you want to call them clearly are just as dumb as you are if they are insisting that these photos are of the correct people. You have yet to provide any links citing that your “apprentinterns” are correct, yet countless people have provided numerous links citing that they are incorrect.
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2:10 pm
I want to subscribe to receive updates from this hilarious satirical Web site. You, sir, are a master of progressive humor, to so accurately portray a clueless bigoted fundie.
That IS what’s happening here, right?
Right?
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2:34 pm
We all sincerely HOPE that’s what’s happening here…but ever since Shat got scared off, I’ve begun to wonder…Before, I was 99% sure, now it’s more like 95%…
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2:36 pm
I am not a bigot.
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2:43 pm
big·ot
Pronunciation: \ˈbi-gət\
Function: noun
Etymology: French, hypocrite, bigot
Date: 1660
: a person obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices; especially : one who regards or treats the members of a group (as a racial or ethnic group) with hatred and intolerance
Source: Meriam-Webster
That pretty much sums you up in a nutshell, Stevie.
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2:54 pm
Cut & Paste!
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3:04 pm
NO! Really? Oh my gosh, Sherlock, you cracked the case! Congratulations! Go get yourself a cookie, you’ve earned it.
Dipshit.
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7:14 pm
“Cut & Paste!”
Well stop the presses! Did you figure that out all by yourself, Billings?
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4:44 am
i’m sorry but how does the fact that he cut and pasted that make it any less viable? as a matter of fact i think it makes it far more viable. he found the official defintion of a bigot and posted it word for word and we get a discription of stephenson billings…thats conclusive proof that you are a bigot EVEN IF IT’S A CUT AND PASTE.
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4:47 am
allright i’m curious. everyone who disagrees with billings allways get 1-2 thumbs down in theire coment even if the ups will skyrocket. and it’s the other ay around with billings….is it really billings that is so sad that he uses difrent acounts to just give that one thumb down to all of us whille he ups his own even if only once? don’t tell me it’s “the regular readers who just don’t post coments” cause if it was there’d be more than just 1-2…unless ofcourse there’s only 2 “regualrs”
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4:54 am
Of course I vote you down when I disagree with you! Sometimes my browser doesn’t work however and I can’t be bothered so I just move on. That’s what the voting is for, that’s how we do it in America.
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7:15 am
just because you disagree doesn’t mean you can’t respect the openion. it doesn’t mean we are wrong.
it just further proves that you take this personal.
also seeing as you are the only one voteing us down…how can you actually belive that there’s really anyone else out there suporting you?
allright all you billings suports if you are out there i dare you: SHOW YOURSELF! lack of a response to this challange will prove that billings doesn’t have the followers he claim
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11:17 am
“Of course I vote you down when I disagree with you! Sometimes my browser doesn’t work however and I can’t be bothered so I just move on. That’s what the voting is for, that’s how we do it in America.”
So if this voting system is so great and American, then why were you bitching about it when it first came around? Oh yeah, because so many people gave your comments thumbs down that they got hidden! Hah!
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11:14 am
i support him
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10:12 pm
Hey Billingsbitch, is your throat too coated with hippo jizz from all the hippo’s cocks you’ve been sucking to speak up and admit you made a horrible mistake posting a wrong picture to top off the terrible garbage you’re calling journalism? I’d say you’re actually lucky that you posted a wrong picture, because it’s taking away from the pile of shit trash article you threw together, probably while using your picture of Jesus as inspiration to keep your boner rock hard throughout the process of writing it. I know, I’m stooping to your level of peasant just by posting on your crapsite, but I thought what the hell, might as well entertain myself by fueling an old man’s fire giving him the only thing he has left in a sad, pathetic, tragedy of a life. Sucks for you, you gotta play with the cards you’re dealt.
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2:24 pm
I don’t understand why this article is getting such hateful and vehement responses! It goes to show the state of the world we live in. Mr. Billings has every right to express his opinions and to spread the word of Christ Jesus to all the dark corners of the world. Dark corners that it appears many of these posters reside in, based on their use of inappropriate language and unchecked anger. What is even more frustrating is the attempts of so many people to discredit the article by claiming that the attached pictures are of the wrong person! One person even went so far as to post a handful of pictures, some of Mr. Ansari with a beard and some without a beard and try to claim that they are two different people! I know what Aziz Ansari looks like! Yes, I’ve seen him do his “comedy” act. I’ve seen him in Parks and Recreation, and I’ve seen him on House. Please move past these childish attempts to discredit this article simply because you cant find a more rational way to defend your ill-conceived beliefs. Mr. Billings, I praise your bravery in your attempt to bring to light the subversiveness that pervades so much of the media consumed by our youth today. Keep fighting for the Light.
Go with God
Amos Carter IV
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4:14 pm
I really hope this comment is as intentionally humorous as the original article. I thought at first that Stephenson was serious, but I’m convinced otherwise after reading his comments (especially “it is incredibly difficult to change something that has been published on the web”), with his blatant finger-pointing, name-calling, and immediate assumptions that every commentor is younger than he his, though, granted, it is a safe bet given the typical age of most internet users. However, that’s all an assumption on my part that Stephenson is in fact as old as he looks in his profile picture. Stephenson Billings? Sounds like a fake name to me. Both are names of cities in Montana, although Montana spells it Stevenson. However, Stephenson has proven himself to not be a champion speller, but we’re all only human. Then again, I’m assuming once more…
Conspiracy theories aside, I would like to thank Stephenson, Claire, and Ambiguous. Your flamewar is a thrilling, hilarious read that has filled my otherwise dreary day with riveting entertainment. I eagerly await the feature film adaptation.
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6:00 am
yes billings have the right to expres his openion. everyone does. so why is it exactly you condem us for expresing our openion just because we don’t share yours? part of the right to free speech is to be able to deal with the responses you’ll get. if billings are not capabel of dealing with the fact that not everyone agrees with him he should not express his openions publicly since the result will allways be a debate of the subject where there’ll most likely be difrent views. you don’t understand why this article gathered so many hateful responses? because billings expressed an openion that quite franly insults quite a few people and some people have a problem with that. he has right to say it right that doesn’t mean that right protect him from us giveing our openion of him back.
“judge not others least you be judged yourself” or something like that right?
also those 2 people are difrent people. they look about as alike as jesus and hitler does.
they have difrent headsiezes and shapes for gods sake and to claim that they atre the same person is retardet. look it up yourself. i mean how the fuck are we suposed to prove it like you tell us to do when all you are going to say when we present proof is you guys saying not good enough or screaming at us that we lie?
trust me it hardly matters to us. the idea of a discusion is not make your oponet agree with you. it’s to make as many spectators as possible agree with you. and in that regard the comments and votes speak for themself. every comment that has a high rateing is against billings. if people suposted him it would be the oposite.
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7:56 pm
You’re pretty crazy there, Amos. But if it’s what you gotta do to keep yourself going, then so be it. To each his own. I guess if you want ignorance to be accepted in life than we should probably all just do it and move on. Let people make outrageous accusations about people they don’t even know and do it all in the name of the Lord. Aziz is an amazing performer, you know nothing about him besides what you say you’ve seen on TV, and you can make up shows that he’s on all you want, it doesn’t mean shit. And you must be pretty weak if you get so offended by words. By your logic, if it wasn’t meant to be said then God wouldn’t have invented it, would he have? Also, I am not in a dark corner, I have a perfectly light house and everything is just great.
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2:12 pm
HERE’S a video of your boy aziz and his terrosist comedy
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3:22 am
First of all, I’ve seen all of Aziz’s comedy and he doesn’t have any terrorism jokes like you suggest. You obviously haven’t seen him in action and are only doing so because he is a muslim (by name). Second of all, Aziz looks to be a secular muslim (non-practicing)from his interviews. I have many muslim friends who are only muslims by name and don’t actually believe in god. Why do you have to badmouth him just because he was born a muslim? Lastly, you are an idiot for actually believing that there is a god and that christianity (a religion that is only 2000 years old, when humans have been around for 2+million years) is correct. Quick fact:94% of scientists are non-believers; they are obviously better equipped at seeing the truth than your idiot self.
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6:01 pm
I’m sure you guys mean well, but the guy who wrote this article must have been dropped on the head as a child. Aziz Ansari is not an Arab, he is Indian, a completely different race/ethnic group, you describe him as a Muslim but let’s face it this is the kind of guy Bin Laden and Al Qaeda would detest, with this kind of lifestyle he wouldn’t last 5 minutes in a Muslim country, he’s no threat to America. The picture on the main part of the article is of actor Kal Penn, completely different person. I’m all for free speech, but this is a joke, making baseless inferences about a completely innocent person, the guy who wrote the article is a racist.
No right thinking person can defend this article in any shape or form, it’s not an article it’s a deliberate hatchet job with no basis in fact. The problem with the entire Christian right is they have hijacked my religion for their own selfish gains, you use God’s name in vain on a daily basis, and now look around you, the shit is hitting the fan, America is broke, the Catholic Church is dying, yet you still carry on insulting the teachings of Jesus, like denying social justice. God is not American, I don’t see America mentioned anywhere in the Bible, he lives within every human on this planet, the sooner you realise that the better chance you have of saving yourselves. Or hey elect an illiterate like Palin and take us straight to the third world.
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8:05 pm
I agree with most of your points, BUT you obviously haven’t been to a Muslim country if you think his lifestyle wouldn’t last there.
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1:48 am
Do I really have to be the asshole that points out that this is a picture of Kal Penn?
I can’t even handle how much fail this whole article is.
Seriously, Stephenson is it? You suck. If you are going to write an article filled with bullshit from start to finish, at least use a picture of the person you are talking about.
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1:54 pm
first off you conservative christian mother fuckers, this is NOT aziz ansari but rather kal penn. secondly, i read your article on GLEE (which lead me to this article) and i think you all need to get the stick out of your asses and stick a huge throbbing dick up there instead. go fuck yourselves, your religion and everything that you stand for. oh, and p.s.- jesus isn’t coming back!
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8:07 pm
I think this whole site is a joke, like a Christian version of the Onion. The sad thing is a lot of people will think its real and see Christians reflected in a negative light. They don’t deserve that.
And in the case that this site IS for real… well then we’re all fucked. The world has already ended, 2012 is just a pleasantry.
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7:22 pm
You’re a bit self-righteous, aren’t you? Just because you don’t believe in Christianity and the teachings of Jesus Christ you come here to slander us? That does not show much compassion and it is not helping the stereotype of Muslims as belligerent and dangerous.
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8:07 pm
You are pathetic Billings. You MUST answer my questions. Why do you think it is all right to be a racist? God cares for ALL humans. Who wants to “help” such a negative stereotype? When numerous civilians of certain countries are brainwashed and corrupted against their own will, or just dislike a country, why should you hate them? Personally, I have seen many negative factors with America: land of gluttony. Kids in my school throwing away sh*t loads of food, people using sh*t loads of gas and electricity, lards on every street; yet, many Americans complain amidst sh*t loads of “necessities”.
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4:05 pm
This is what happens when you don’t graduate from high school; you get ill-informed, poorly researched, and extremely idiotic posts by people who are not intellectually capable of voicing an opinion.
Just as Aziz is a “Muslim”, I’ll come to the hard conclusion that Billings is a KKK member living in the South, toting a gun and a Bible, all while ranting and raving about how anyone who isn’t a Christian white male should be eradicated from the world.
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5:51 pm
The author of this article is j another ignorant racist American
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10:43 pm
LO f-ing L… hilarious.
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5:01 pm
These are photo’s of New Jersey born Indian-American actor Kal Penn from “Harold and Kumar” not photo’s of South Carolina born Indian-American actor Aziz Ansari from “Parks and Recreation.” Do some actual investigating you retard!
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5:11 pm
Seeing as they were both born in this country and their ancestry has absolutely nothing to do with the Muslim community, then why exactly are we even talking about this…oh yeah because Stephenson Billings is an ignorant fucking RACIST that has far more to explain to the American people than anyone he’s ever written about. The only threat to America here is the author, Stephenson Billings.
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5:21 pm
Please keep your racist hate speech off this web site. Thank you.
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5:36 pm
How about you practice what you preach, Billings. It’s not OK for “Fuckchrist Wiredotorg” to speak ill of you but you can spout all the racist, hate-filled, idiocy you want, about who ever you want. Ever heard of a hypocrite…oh wait, I’m sorry, that’s 8th grade vocabulary, let me dumb it down for you so you can understand…You are a RACIST!
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5:46 pm
Hey Steve, you do realize that for something to be racist or hate-filled it has to actually target a specific race or be full of hate…someone correcting you because you are completely and utterly wrong in everything you do is not racist, it’s just right. You would think a supposedly educated “investigative journalist” such as yourself would want to know when he is wrong, so as to get the facts straight and not mislead his readers. But you obviously have no care for what’s right or wrong.
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3:28 am
How very mature of you… Hey, I’m simply speaking up for my rights as a Christian-American to spread the good news about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I write in service of His glory, to proclaim his name. In doing so, I am also an American and I believe in Patriotism. I am willing to defend the greatness of our nation as best I can. I am not of the crowd that thinks we can build a Islamic mosque on Ground Zero where thousand of Americans died at the hands of Islamic terrorists. Yes, this is a fight we fight every day. Please understand I am only doing this because I love you enough to want to save your soul, I love America and I love Jesus Christ. God bless my friend.
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4:00 am
but then what about tyhe pumpkin babies billings. how will we ever save them from santa clause?
if you aren’t gonna stay on topic why should we?
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5:18 pm
This website and Stephenson Billings make me utterly ashamed to call myself a Christian. This site is for nothing more than bigots and Christian Terrorists!
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12:55 am
Why do you ignore the intelligent questions and simply argue with the ignorant comments people leave? I will post an earlier comment that you ignored in hopes that you will accept some responsibility.
“Mr. Billings, I work for a magazine and spend the better part of my Monday-Fridays writing for the web, so I know how exceedingly easy it is to go back and change something that has been published online. “Who I am” to question your integrity as a journalist is a fellow member of the field with a degree in our practice. Changing something inaccurate in a report online is similar to the way newspapers have done it in print all along; you don’t change the body of the text, you add an addendum to the beginning or end of the article preceded by the word “correction” or “update.” In the case of your photo, I would advise changing the image and adding to the body of the text something like “Note: The image that originally ran with this article was of Kal Penn, not e Aziz Ansari, about whom this article is written. We apologize for the mistake.”
An anecdote from my own life this week: I wrote an article about an upcoming release from a band I like and, relying on my own memory of their work, I included an error in my article. It didn’t affect the content of the article, but it was an error nonetheless. A commenter caught it, and my editor noticed before I did. He replied, thanking the guy who pointed out the mistake in the first place, double-checked to make sure I had indeed gotten it wrong, and changed the fact in the article. The documentation of the fact that an error was made and corrected is right there on the page with the story for anyone to see. It’s not sneaky to take steps, even after publication to make sure what you publish is true. It IS sneaky to leave something false on your publication when you know it’s false. It’s sneaky to tell your readers that it’s incredibly hard to change things after publication on the web when it’s actually much, much easier to do this online than it is in print. And print people still manage to do it: magazines and newspapers have a section at the front of the book that’s reserved for setting factual errors from the previous edition straight.
You mentioned protecting the truth, and I don’t see how you can do that by leaving a false statement published for others to read. I’m not suggesting that you change anything your readers ever say is wrong – you obviously deal with a lot of contention in your comments section. I am suggesting, however, that when someone points out a factual error, you take that seriously. You look it up yourself. Don’t ask your intern to do it, especially if he gave you the wrong photo in the first place. If you find out that a mistake has truly been made, take the time to rectify it in a transparent way that allows your readers the knowledge that you didn’t get it right the first time and that you’re being diligent that what you put out into the world isn’t misleading.
In our business, being convinced of your own integrity isn’t good enough. You’ve got to convince your readers, too – and not just the ones who agree with you, either.”
—
Please, respond to some comments that aren’t simply ripping on you, cursing you out, or riddled with grammar issues.
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4:02 pm
Listen Matt, I’m bascially a freelance journalist. I submit articles, they get picked up and published. If you wrote an article for the AP that ended up in the Nashville Times and later on you saw a typo, what are the chances that you could go back and change that? Your nitpicky attitude is just annoying. I have better things to do than adjust the tint of some photo on an article because it offends a few people in the Middle East. Grow up, the real world doesn’t bow down to you every time you need your shoes tied. I am so sick and tired of you freaks and whatnot harassing and threatening me over this. I WILL NEVER CHANGE MY PHOTOS I HAPPEN TO LIKE THEM ANYWAY.
God bless you.
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4:10 pm
But you’re not a journalist, you’re just a blogger.
And calm down. You sound like you’re on the verge of yet another all-caps, run-on rant with misspelled words.
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4:30 pm
well you seem to have problem with our raptor-jesus and devil-pope pictures so yes it matters. now fuck of you’re still wrong.
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11:42 am
You have the wrong picture of the actor you are writing about. Before you go slamming someone on the internet you should at least check you have the right actor.
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2:30 pm
Why do you ignore the intelligent questions and simply argue with the ignorant comments people leave? I will post an earlier comment that you ignored in hopes that you will accept some responsibility.
“Mr. Billings, I work for a magazine and spend the better part of my Monday-Fridays writing for the web, so I know how exceedingly easy it is to go back and change something that has been published online. “Who I am” to question your integrity as a journalist is a fellow member of the field with a degree in our practice. Changing something inaccurate in a report online is similar to the way newspapers have done it in print all along; you don’t change the body of the text, you add an addendum to the beginning or end of the article preceded by the word “correction” or “update.” In the case of your photo, I would advise changing the image and adding to the body of the text something like “Note: The image that originally ran with this article was of Kal Penn, not e Aziz Ansari, about whom this article is written. We apologize for the mistake.”
An anecdote from my own life this week: I wrote an article about an upcoming release from a band I like and, relying on my own memory of their work, I included an error in my article. It didn’t affect the content of the article, but it was an error nonetheless. A commenter caught it, and my editor noticed before I did. He replied, thanking the guy who pointed out the mistake in the first place, double-checked to make sure I had indeed gotten it wrong, and changed the fact in the article. The documentation of the fact that an error was made and corrected is right there on the page with the story for anyone to see. It’s not sneaky to take steps, even after publication to make sure what you publish is true. It IS sneaky to leave something false on your publication when you know it’s false. It’s sneaky to tell your readers that it’s incredibly hard to change things after publication on the web when it’s actually much, much easier to do this online than it is in print. And print people still manage to do it: magazines and newspapers have a section at the front of the book that’s reserved for setting factual errors from the previous edition straight.
You mentioned protecting the truth, and I don’t see how you can do that by leaving a false statement published for others to read. I’m not suggesting that you change anything your readers ever say is wrong – you obviously deal with a lot of contention in your comments section. I am suggesting, however, that when someone points out a factual error, you take that seriously. You look it up yourself. Don’t ask your intern to do it, especially if he gave you the wrong photo in the first place. If you find out that a mistake has truly been made, take the time to rectify it in a transparent way that allows your readers the knowledge that you didn’t get it right the first time and that you’re being diligent that what you put out into the world isn’t misleading.
In our business, being convinced of your own integrity isn’t good enough. You’ve got to convince your readers, too – and not just the ones who agree with you, either.”
—
Please, respond to some comments that aren’t simply ripping on you, cursing you out, or riddled with grammar issues.
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3:52 pm
“Hey I get it now. This is some kind of parody article. Nobody can really be as dense as this Stephenson Billings guy. Ha ha ha. Very funny Mr Billings.”
And your insane replies to commenters and your refusal to correct all the errors and your refusal to change the photo because “your intern thought is was Ansari”. Pure comedy gold. You are as funny as Ansari.
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1:17 pm
I have pitty for this site. You are much like the Pharisees of Israel. Your deeds are there for the praise of God but your insides are as barren as the desert. On one hand you call Americans back woods and intolerant of other cultures and in another article you slam the Chinese walmart for carrying traditional Chinese items. Your site does not check it’s facts apparently either from the goof in this article
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8:51 pm
It’s called “post modernism.” :3
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9:17 am
THIS SITE IS SATIRE.
Google it, look around – all the articles are similarly provocative and ridiculous.
I’m liberal, but in my mind it isn’t cool to basically goad people into hating a group of people (christian conservatives) under false pretenses. If the site’s goal is to satirize them, they could do so effectively while letting on it’s a satire – as colbert and many others do. If the goal is to hurt the religious right, they lose the moral high ground by resorting to deceptive, immoral tactics to do so – they should let the farces of the right stand on their own without needing to grossly exaggerate them. If their goal is just to get traffic and they don’t care at all one way or the other about the politics, it’s still an immoral thing to do as it victimizes both the religious right and other people who are bothered and deceived into hatred by the article for the personal gain (whether it’s revenue or amusement) of the authors.
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9:41 am
Toby,
I am sorry I hurt your delicate sensibilities but I have to ask: what is it that you want from me? For me to be completely silenced, shut off from the world? Is this not how you operate when you overhear speech that does not conform to your politically correct version of life?
I understand that you liberals just forget about your love of free speech when an American honestly voices his opinions on the righeousness of traditional marriage, and the pro-life movement, Tea Party progressives and fiscal responsibility in DC, but I do and so do many good, hard-working Americans. Maybe, just maybe, when you’re older and have spent a decade or more navigating careers and jobs and health benefit issues and mortgages, taxes and family, you might grasp that this is not a two-dimensional world we live in. There are no easy answers, I am sorry to tell you that. But the world is far more complex than you people drinking Obama’s kool aid imagine it to be.
You single me out, like a good liberal, for a heavy dose of disinformation and slander with your mediocre conspiracy theory about satire. Do you know me? Who are you to question my faith? Just because you lamestream media types hate patriotism, you think this gives you an excuse to be self-righteous and lecture me? You sound so very naive about the world, my friend, naive and conceited to tell you the truth.
I’ve said this before and I’m going to paste this here for your benefit Toby: To all those who are calling me out, trying to spread their slander and calling me an exception to modern Christian-American patriotism, let me ask you this: Is what I’m doing any different than say Rev. Robertson or Rev. Falwell? Do you not listen to Bill Donohue of the Catholic League or James Hartline and his ministry? What I write is no different than them. What about Dr. James Dobson and Focus on the Family or Tony Perkins and the American Family Council? We are all together, united fighting the same fight for America’s souls. Are you with us or against us? Please get down off that high horse. You have to realize the majority of Christians follow the teachings of the great men I mentioned above, that their leadership is the last defense from the surge of immorality overtaking this country. Are you against us or with us? I guess your answer is self-evident.
Stephenson
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11:10 pm
Why the fuck do they have this shit load of Kal Penn Photos with Azis Ansaris name all over the place?
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8:32 am
Seriously Stephenson Billings, you are the reason this country is turning into a shithole.
You are a fucking moron.
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9:03 am
Don’t blame me, blame Obama.
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9:09 am
great comedy website keep up the good work.
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12:57 am
This article is riddled with errors, but I’ll just go with the easy one, the one that is least offensive, but one that clearly shows you did the absolute minimum of research: the entire concept of Parks and Recreation is that the characters are being filmed by documentary cameras. They act awkward because they know they are around cameras, they look into cameras because in their world, the cameras are actually there. There are even talking heads sequences which further drive this point home. This is the same style adopted by the popular sitcoms The Office and Modern Family, so Parks and Recreation is not the only TV series like this. I assume you’ll have some half-hearted retort, but the plain fact of the matter is that you have no idea what you’re talking about re: Parks and Recreation. As for that New York Times quote, I’m sure it’s from a review of the first season. The series is now possibly the most critically acclaimed comedy on television.
Oh, and here’s the other easy one: as many others have stated, that is a picture of Kal Penn, not Aziz Ansari. It is extremely easy to edit articles on the Internet. That you haven’t just shows how sloppy and unprofessional you are.
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9:47 am
this has got to be the most unintelligent ignorant 2000 words I’ve read in my entire life. im not even being hyperbolic. I still haven’t figured out if Stephenson Billings is a joke of a person or real.
by the way how could any human possibly take a site that has a headline titled ‘Boycott Bill Murray for a Better America’ seriously.
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3:31 pm
This is not journalism. This is not news. This isn’t anything different than listening to the lunatic on the street corner ranting on government conspiracy or some hidden, underground civilization that lives among the rats in the sewers. There is nothing of substance in your article; your research, your logic, and reasoning are inherently flawed. As a journalist, as an American citizen, and as a Christian, I am utterly offended. This man is a wolf in sheeps clothing? Get real. Turn the lens on yourself. By distorting the facts you can get any audience to agree with you, so long as they’re naive, but you’re dealing with readers that are intelligent and clearly aren’t buying what you have to say. If anything this shows the integrity that you have as a person and as a “journalist”, as you have stated that you put a lot of research and “love” in this piece, in which case you have only accurately portrayed your ignorance and with your lack of attention to factual reporting, you have subsequently turned your every word into nothing but wasted pixels and worthless steam. After reading this I will never read anything by this publication again, because if they’re willing to employ you, than clearly this can only be a mark of their lack of standards when it comes to quality journalism. Perhaps you’d find better company and reception on the street corner to spew this tasteless, filth.
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8:54 am
Aziz Ansari is an atheist not a Muslim you morons.
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9:51 pm
I just stumbled upon this report and am suprised at your article and your comments below! I think this article coming from a Christian site reflects negatively on the Christian religion and your integrity as an author. As it has been pointed out you have made several mistakes one bein the fact that you featured Kal Penn not Aziz Ansari. You also make some sweeping generalizations. What are we as christians to judge a man as a terrorist Or terrorist supporter by his ethnicity or religion. Aziz has provided laughs for a countless number of people and I’m sure he is an inspiration for many. This man has already accomplished so much! What have you accomplished? Let’s please put more thought and time into papers in the future and as Christians try to judge people less!
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1:07 pm
I’m just here to say that the person who wrote this shit and http://christwire.org are a bunch of racist ass clowns. and btw THERE IS NO GOD WHEN YOU DIE. DEAL WITH IT.
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5:34 pm
I’ve been surfing on-line more than 3 hours as of late, yet I never discovered any fascinating article like yours. It?s pretty price enough for me. Personally, if all website owners and bloggers made just right content material as you probably did, the web might be much more helpful than ever before.
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