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How Do I Go About Making Friends With Black People?
February 9, 2010 by Amber
Filed under Ask Amber, Faith Links, Featured, Values & Lifestyle
Send your advice questions to Amber at askamber@christwire.org
Dear Amber,
I am a 20-year-old college student from Naples, Florida. All my life, my parents provided for me and gave me a upbringing that was moderately luxurious by many standards. I am grateful and appreciative for what they have given me.
One thing I was deprived of, however, is diversity in my upbringing. Growing up, the private schools I attended had very few black people. Long story short, my circle of friends were mostly white and even now at U of F, it’s more of the same. I’d like to expand my circle and my experiences.
I’ve thought about joining the school’s BSU (Black Student Union) but worry that I will not be taken seriously or may offend someone by joining. I guess I’m writing to ask if you have any suggestions on how I can get over my apprehensiveness or how to make friends well with black people?
- Ready for Change in Florida
Dear Ready for Change in Florida,
There is only one thing you can do; be yourself. Realize this, and you’ll find friends of varying backgrounds, beliefs, worldview and even race. Friendship and getting to know people should not be determined by black and white skin, but rather by character, respect and interest in one another.
Instead of worrying about fitting in with black people, in your case, instead simply go to a BSU meeting and be yourself. I trust you’ll find friends. Beware that from your potentially sheltered upbringing, and going to a private school, that some may offer you drugs or to go to their parties.
While it is good to not prejudge, use wisdom. Never go anywhere alone with a young guy you may meet at a BSU meeting, even if it’s “just” a basketball game or “just” a chicken shack, because he may be looking to take advantage of you and do mean things to your body.
-Amber
Dear Amber,
With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, and later this year my wife and I are celebrating our tenth!! wedding anniversary, I thought I should do something very special.
The thing is that this year has been tough financially and we have three little ones. We love each other dearly, but that passionate, romantic spark we had when we were first married seems to be fading and that worries me. I thought doing something really exciting this year would help rekindle that flame, but I’m not sure if I have the means or times to set things up. Help and your insight very much appreciated!?
- Concerned, Loving Husband/Daddy Up North
Dear Concerned,
Congratulations on ten years of marriage and having a beautiful family of three children. To have such in life is the greatest blessing.
Your wife knows your financial situation. She knows the strain three young kids put on your life as well as you do. Don’t feel like you have to make grandiose plans, rather, be in reality and do what your means allow.
Leading up to Valentines, do random things; meet for lunch, make an elegant, romantic dinner at home, dressed in casual evening wear. Eat by candlelight and reflect on the best parts of the last ten years.
On Valentines, get a babysitter and stay a night at a nice, but not too expensive, hotel. It’s the getting away from it all, even if just a different room for a night, that can bring a breath of fresh air.
Most importantly, don’t think you need Valentines day to do these things. Do random, romantic things THROUGH THE YEAR. Do not fall into habit so easily; you’ll be surprised what little things and fun changes can bring into your long, blessed marriage.
-Amber
Dear Amber,
Last week my wife walked into our son’s room and caught him looking at pornography on his computer. When she told me this, I felt as if I had been socked in the stomach.
What made it even worse though is that it was gay pornography. I am not even comfortable addressing this to my son yet and he knows that I know. I just can’t find the words to say and my wife is also frustrated as she wants me to handle this. Any suggestions?
- Dad in Georgia
Dear Dad in Georgia,
The Bible makes it very clear that your son will sear in hell, for all time, if he choose to live a gay lifestyle. The Bible also makes it clear that it is your duty, as the father, to raise your child in the way he should go.
Your son’s choice to explore gay pornography is a trap 4% of teenage young men fall into annually. They do this either due to to past psychological trauma or pressure from other gays, perhaps a bully at school or swayed by the rampant homosexual agenda in modern media.
Whatever the case, as a father you have to take the initiative. You must set your son down and let him know he is sick in the mind and spirit. God did not create his body to lust for other men; his body is created to be a vessel of life and creation, a testament unto his Creator.
In marriage, he is supposed to enjoy creation, just as you did with your wife. He will give rise to offspring, as nature intended.
Deviation from that path is not normal or rational. Let him know this, and if needed, enroll him in sessions with a Christian counselor. If he does not respond to verbal therapy, consult a psychologist as well as depression may be present and he may need strong prescription medications.
Do this quickly, as his brain will continually create new synapses that deceive him into thinking gay relationships are somehow what his body desires. The alternative, again, is your son gets a disease, dies and burns in hell and it is your fault. How would God and your wife judge you for that?
-Amber
Hey Amber!
Spring is just around the corner and I’m worried about my shape! Any suggestions on how to knock off the holiday pounds before shedding the winter garbs and coats?
- Tubby in the UK
Dear Tubby,
Getting off those holiday pounds is a annual tradition for many (of us 
).
To lose weight at any point, barring any medical condition, you should try a natural approach.
Drink plenty of water. Try to do at least 30 minutes of cardio exercise a day. Target muscle groups in areas you may have let become soft over the winter. Keep eating, just do it reasonably.
With getting your heart rate up to a target zone per day, along with balanced eating habits and water, you will find your body will go down to its natural size over time. By summer, you will be ready to dawn your one piece at the pool.
-Amber
If you would like to ask Amber a question or for a word of life-enriching advice, simply email AskAmber@christwire.org.
wow at least 2 out of four is not “stupid or Biased” ( well the first letetr was somehow correct at first ) and the third one is erff … well stupid
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This is THE most hate-filled site i have ever seen in all my existsence. You people are insane! Do you really thing that God approves of your beliefs? God is love!! Who are you to judge? God is the ONLY judge of mankind…and you are blasphemous to think you are anywhere near him! I think that God is ashamed of you spreading your hate in his name. Referring to black people as ‘creatures’??? It saddens my heart to know there are people who won’t come to know God because of this site, and all the hatred within it.
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TEAM AMBER!
Hot debate. What do you think?
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More like Team-ing with stupidity.
OH DOUBLE SNAP.
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“Do this quickly, as his brain will continually create new synapses that deceive him into thinking gay relationships are somehow what his body desires.”
You know nothing about the brain, Amber.
“By summer, you will be ready to dawn your one piece at the pool.”
It’s “don”, Amber, not “dawn”. Idiot.
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your ideas about why some people are gay are still as insane as ever.
i’ll ask again: based on what do you conclude that you have to be turned gay rather than it being something you just are. being homosexual is being attracted to people of the same gender. why would these people be able to decide who they find attractive. i certainly don’t decide which girls i think is hot neither do any of my friends. why would a homosexual be any different?
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I’ve studied medicine for a long time now and can tell you that it is not normal for people to be homosexual.
It is fine for you to be attracted to females; your body is designed just for such things. It is not natural for you to like guys. Think about marrying a guy and letting him do all sorts of weird things to your body. The thought disgusts you and you would not do it. Why? It is not right, natural or normal.
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you are right i’m honestly disgusted by the thought….but homosexuals are not. that alone disproves you theory. they want that because they are in fact attracted to their own gender. again : if you do not decide what girls you find attractive why should gays be any different?
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“It is not right, natural or normal.”
These are 3 separate concepts, actually.
Right is the subjective judgement of something, via a moral code.
Natural is simply what happens in nature.
Normal is what applies to a majority of individuals in a population.
Therefore, being homosexual is not normal, but it is natural. Right or wrong, well, obviously for most christians is wrong. But I just wanted to make my point about it actually being a natural phenomenon.
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OK i am half black so i know your white minds. and i know black. For I am half.
Listen us blacks * as you racists like to call it* do not always sell drugs. I attend a school where there are mostly white hill billies i live on farmland. In fact 5 just got arrested for doing drugs. Any blacks? no. I think you guys are to caught up with us blacks thinking we are the devils when personally God needs to save you’re souls from the pits of hell. Study the bible! does it not say treat one another as you would treat yourself? Study it! You should hypocritical. And Ready for change in Florida , it is very easy to make friends with black people we are all alike. Do not worry(: God Bless you and have a happy Easter!
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Well who sold the drugs to them? 9/10 says it was either Mexis or some other group that sneaked the drugs and forced them to get addicted.
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once again!!! nothing but hate and lies!!! you people should be ashamed of yourselves!!! you ARE racist…keep trying to tell yourself i’m ignorant because i think that way, when actually it’s FACT!!! you people are hate-filled racists that are doing more harm than good…to actually think you are warping young minds with this filth!!! And i will say again…GOD IS LOVE!!! and not bias, conditional, as-long-as-you-are-like-me kind of love…UNCONDITIONAL LOVE..please actually read your scriptures (if you can read because you can’t spell or use proper grammar) I have family that are black…and i love them completely!! I don’t look at them and see the color of their skin, but their souls…I see them as CHILDREN OF GOD as we all are..and I think God would be…no IS..ashamed of the way you are treating his children.
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errrr sorry to tell you but They don,t teach you that in “medicine” I have 2 friend who studied medicine ( one to become a Nurse the other to become well a Nurse but for older people ( caregiver I think )
and actually I read her book for the “normal” nurse and I found Nothing about Homosexualityy it’s true that homosexuality is a Psychological Behaviour ( well everything comes from attraction to another is psychological behaviour )
and we need a SEXOLOGIST for that this person Talks about the “homosexual phenomenon” and trust me the sister of my friend Nurse is a sexologist and she said that Homosexual is Natural and Normal There is Nothing Bad or EVIL about that
and we should worry More about the christian who kill Million of afghan and iraqis oversea or raped millions of vietnamiese girl in viet wars ?
or even In cold war the people who raped russian children ( the people who raped the russian kids and mother were American)
The priest Pedophile who raped Boy even the Believer started to Think about their faith with the Vatican and their priest
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This website is freaking horrible!
I found it by looking up pictures of how bad cigarettes are for your body to show my mom.. and ended up finding a poll on “Is it okay for a Christian men to ‘gently’ beat his wife?” MOST PEOPLE SAID YES! This is not right!!! I am 14 years old and even IIII know better!!
As for THIS article, it’s labeled “How Do I Go About Making Friends With Black People?”
I understand that you may live in another state than I do and things are different, or if you were brought up where your parents don’t like black people, but with how many famous people are black today (example: Barack Obama) you should know that they are really no different from white people. You can be better than everyone around you and make friends with black people just by acting as if they are just like you or your white friends.
As for the things here that I’ve seen about gays here, THIS IS TOTALLY OUT OF LINE! Gays are just like anyone else! What is said about them is terrible because I have MANY gay friends and they mostly are the nicest people on the plannet! I don’t understand why JUST because of their sexual orrientation, you people have to be rude to them.
Do you understand what they go through?
I have one friend who goes on the bus to school EVERY day where people constantly say to him, “Faggot”, “Queer”, “So do you get a boner just by looking at yourself in the mirror”, and so many more TERRIBLE things.
There were a couple rumors about me in 6th and 7th grade about me dating and making out with girls, and no matter where I was there were people from school texting me or talking to me through the computer or even confronting me in person, even when they had never known me or talked to me before, and they would say “So did you really make out with them?” or guys would say, “So do you like boobs? If you do, I can understand why”, and it scarred me probably for life. The one thing I remember was from a year ago when I went to the pool with my best friend and our other friend and we were walking by a crowd from school as they started harassing us and saying things about and whispering even though we were right next to them, and then I remember as we were walking by this guy, Brad Caramusa, he said, “Go make out with Skylar.”
How would you like to live your lives like that day after day? It tears you down and you lose your self-esteem. You’ll have issues for the rest of your lives if people are constantly saying these things to you.
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Be kind to Amber for she is the lovechild of a brother and sister, and deserves our pity. Her Uncle/Daddy beats her daily and her Mother doesn’t love her preferring to spend her time whoring at the casino.
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I find that a great icebreaker when meeting Negroes is to loudly praise one of the outstanding representatives of their race, Al Jolson.Go ahead & try it!Don’t be shy!
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Hate to break the news to you. But there are no “fag bullies” at school, no one is TELLING your son to love men. No one is tricking him. It’s not anyone’s “fault” because there’s nothing to fault. He is gay. He has always been gay. He always will be gay.
The only fear you should have is that your son will be subjected to the hate and disgust that is demonstrated on websites like these. Please be supportive to him, and help him defend his identity.
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This site is a parody and it’s hilarious.
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