Mickelson: Golf Is Boring Without Tiger Woods

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Several months ago, golf star Tiger Woods shamed and betrayed America by cheating on his beautiful supermodel wife with dozens of prostitutes and women of the streets.

The swift revelation of Tiger’s behind the scend antics shocked the golf world and estranged most if not all of his endorsement contracts, which totalled in the billions of dollars.

With the PGA tour somewhat distancing themselves from their cash-cow, and Tiger going into hiding, it has made one thing clear: golf is boring without Tiger Woods.

There is a certain cultural flavor people like Tiger Woods and Vijay Singh bring to each and every fairway.

We all saw Vijay Singh once use his devil powers to make a put skip across water like Jesus and then roll backwards to get a hole in one, and then Tiger followed that up with an equally cultish shot where he made a ball magically go through several hundred yards of thick wood without hitting a tree.

My friends, though these things are surely entertaining we must remember that Satan is the ultimate entertainer. He’s invented places like Las Vegas and Hollywood, all to woo you with bright lights and magic shows and then trick your soul straight into hell. Don’t think the antics of the Singhs and Woods of golf are too far behind.