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Atheists Continue To Disrespect Easter with Zombie Jesus Jokes, Photographic Sacrilege
April 4, 2010 by Derek Van Buren
Filed under Christian Morality, Faith Links, Values & Lifestyle
A little less than 2,000 years ago today, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ laid down his life on Calvary so that all of our sins may be forgiven.
Christ allowed the Romans and Jews to betray him and spit upon him, even though he was their Lord. He did this so that we may repent of our sins and have the gift of eternal life through him, by following the commands of the Bible and accepting Christ in our hearts. That is the Passion of our Christ.
How sick is it that there are people on Earth who after hearing the beautiful Passion story, they still try to deny Christ and even mock him? These new age heathens still dare to defy Christ, though now he is upon his throne in heaven and awaiting them to follow his love.
Last year we saw the ugly face of atheism when Pastor Jack exposed all the Zombie Jesus Jokes from Atheists he was sent on Resurrection Sunday.
Now today we find the atheists still have no respect. I hope they realize that hell burns hotter than the sun itself, and the day comes when they only wish they could have a Sunday where they went to church for Easter than a nice, ardent day’s park lunch with family afterward.
These images are sick and are archived just so you understand that atheists have no heart and this is the exact type thing that is sending them straight to the deepest recesses of hell. Warning: The following images represent typical atheist depravity and are very offensive. Please order your women/children to exit the room before review.
This sample takes alleged origin in a German atheist magazine. As if the Germans don’t have enough to atone for, considering how they tried to wipe out God’s chosen people and then conspired against God’s nation of America, we see they have a burgeoning antichrist culture among their youth. Many Germans are going to get a taste of hellfire.
Simply immature.
This was another sent to Pastor Gould, attached with a threatening message about “headshotting” Christian zombies. This one was very offensive and to whoever sent it, know that you will be judged with the gays, abortionists and NAZIs for that one.
I found this one to be among the more offensive images I received for review. The grayscale and words are hurtful and are not the product of a heart who appreciates the sacrifice God made, by giving his only Son as sacrifice to us so that we may have eternal life. The love of Christ kept him nailed to the cross, so that you could be forgiven for your sins. It is sad to know that there are people who would deride such a beautiful act of mercy and love from our Savior, Our Lord.
As if this wasn’t enough, some atheists calling themselves callofhell emailed about a video they created this year. They have titled it “Zombie Passion of the Christ” and have done all they could to offend us. There seems to be a tie between the video and these jaded atheist vloggers (i.e., 1 and 2) who made threats against several of our interns and staff last year.
Nothing but disrespect abounds in this film and in the Book of Life, the director of this film will find his name listed for the credits. Hopefully he or she knows that there is an award for directing films like this, and it is called a one way ticket to hell.
In this one we see people have taken the time to dress up on Easter Sunday and disrespect Christianity, then email to gloat about it. It is very offensive and everyone involved with this is childish.
Easter is about love and respect, so why go ruining it with targeting and offending those with different beliefs?
The flurry just continued from this point:
This was another sent from the “headshotting” Christians on Easter person. It is smarmy in its arrogant assertion that tries to equate Christ to the Easter Bunny, contrived as per standing cultural custom for holiday. Christ is the only way to heaven, so whosoever does not accept his gift of eternal life will burn in hell for all time.
There are plenty more in similar vein, but I do believe that is enough for this year’s example of how atheists are relentlessly offensive and belligerent to Christians and more importantly, stand against God. Those who stand against God are allied with Satan, and as we saw when even a host of angels dared team with Satan to defy God, all who stand against God shall be cast into hell.
Be well, friends, and let us take the time to thank God for all he has done for our lives. Let us thank Christ for loving us and sacrificing himself so that we may live eternally in the glorious splendor of our Creator and our Master.
That video is highly disturbing. Can you provide us the email of who sent it so we can at least witness to them and let them know how offensive it is. I’m also emailing YouTube to ask for them to remove it, very offensive.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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what scares me most is that you might be serious.
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i think its fucking hilarious, i hope its true lol, graaahhhh braaiinnsss
fuck jesus
fuck god
fuck america
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Happy Zombie Jesus Day! I hope you enjoy your flesh snacks and blood drinks today.
Just don’t come ‘Ghaa’ing at my door or you’ll get the ‘double tap’.
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Just to clarify, ridiculing Christianity is a tool to help you see what silliness it truly is. You are grown adults talking to an invisible man, based on a book edited by Constantine over 1700 years ago and multiple Catholics over the last millennium; doesn’t that trouble you in the least? The hope of millions of people across the world is that we can live in peace and harmony, without the need for any God. If that idea scares you, it may as well should. It takes a great deal of mental fortitude to leave behind the parent figure of God and become self-reliant; most human beings aren’t ready for this idea. Yet, we hold hope you will visualize it like we do, and awaken to the world anew. Good luck to you all.
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Thanks for the pictures, they were hilarious. Happy Zombie Jesus Day!
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Part of the reason this country of ours is suffering so much today is that children and young people are afraid of hard work, instead they live in these zombie fantasy worlds and dungeons and dragons wearing makeup and black gowns. They think it’s all fun and games but not only are they hurting the economy, but they’re growing up without faith. When all you have around you is these gothic and zombie images, you fall into darkness and soon only find comfort in hate and satanism.
“Since the children have flesh and blood, he too shared in their humanity so that by his death he might destroy him who holds the power of death — that is, the devil — and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.” –Hebrews 2: 14, 15
Hot debate. What do you think?
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I’ve never actually heard someone suggest that contributing to the capitalist economy is the moral thing to do. I mean, what choice do we have? It’s either work or starve. Kind of like “gimme the money or I shoot”, no?
But, yeah, that idea is totally your own invention. There’s nothing in the Bible about contributing to the economy being “moral”. If anything, it’s the opposite, as profiting off of someone else just means that the other person has less money. Isn’t that like the opposite of what the Bible says?
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What? You think those games and cloaks are cheap do you? It’s not like they are nicking all of them you know. It takes work to earn the capital, and some effort to put them on a credit card. Now, let’s talk about the Christian tenet of saving…..
Hot debate. What do you think?
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People seem to miss a major part of the point of these zombie Jesus depictions. From the atheist perspective, Jesus either did not exist or was not divine and did not take part in many of the stories attributed to him. To the atheist, belief in the resurrection is equivalent to belief in the Alice in Wonderland story. It is considered to be ridiculous. “Zombie Jesus” accentuates how ridiculous the atheist perceives the resurrection to be. On the flip side, Christianity generally believes atheists will be eternally punished after death for not accepting Jesus. Atheists do not believe this and may tire of constantly being told that Christians believe atheists are doomed. If Christians are going to find zombie Jesus offensive, they have to accept that atheists may think being preached to about salvation is offensive as well.
If Christians expect others to put up with their potentially offensive witnessing/preaching/evangelism then it is only right that they put up with the “offensive disbelief” of others.
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“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” –Isaiah 41:10.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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“Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. ” –Matthew, 7.
This post is a little quick on the hellfire and eternal damnation. The author should remember that there’s only one final arbiter.
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That is one of the most misunderstood and overused quotes from the Bible. If Christian leaders can’t judge immorality, than who can? Should we just let the pedophiles and criminals do want they want because we’re too politically correct to “judge” them? You are simplistic and have no backbone of faith. it’s people like you who are destroying what’s left of this country with your slippery slope liberalism and uncontrolled sexual urges. This is not the hippie 60s so quit your drugs and work on making this world better– get a job, let a woman make you honest. Contribute to the economy!
Hot debate. What do you think?
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tell that to your Pope and your priest Billings those scumbags just love to have their dick sucked By altar Boy we alls ee it on news ( and since religion is religion we knew it ) in a total of 200 000 children has been raped By priest
the Vatican also contributed in selling weapon to afghanistan iraq and Iran as well so they are the Biggest criminal ever
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I agree, that quote is a bit overused. It does not a command, it is a caution. Please, feel free to judge all you want, but know that in so doing, you will be held to a much higher standard than those you judge.
Disclaimer: This is only an interpretation of what some man wrote in a book about a person that didn’t exist.
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Misunderstood? How exactly is it misunderstood? It says right there, don’t judge other people, so instead of listening to that, you decide to interpret it the way you want to and then proceed to make no less than three judgements on someone you haven’t even MET, and it’s HIGHLY likely most of them are outright false.
So let’s see, you’ve committed the sin of pride (only Christian leaders can judge), greed (get a job and help the economy), lust (get a woman to make you honest) and slander. Ok, slander isn’t a deadly sin, it’s just being an a**.
I don’t know what kind of “church” you go to, but it sounds a lot like the Westboro Baptist church. You protest soldier’s funerals while you’re nitpicking on everyone else’s imaginary faults? Maybe stomp on the flag a little, wipe your ass with it, and praise a little Jesus on the side to make yourself feel better?
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No it is not the 60’s, it is 2010. Good observation:)
Rock over London, Rock on Chicago, Christianity – defying logic since Constantine.
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Christian leaders ARE pedophiles and criminals.
Religion does not make you ethically sound or have a more legitimate faculty for judgement than non-religious.
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Shall I use small words?
No, the leaders of Christianity are not all-knowing omnibenevolent moral geniuses. They’re people, despite their title and are falible as any human. Most of us do NOT need them to tell us what is and isn’t moral.
There is such a thing as moral truth, mate. It’s based on the idea that morals should be founded on intelligent reasoning and prevention of human suffering, not a voice in a storm.
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Hey, don’t forget this gem.
I was a christian for about the first 23 years of my life. It is hard to respect anything that perpetrates such atrocities and is so hateful and xenophobic. IT is also hard to respect something that does not exist.
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I request this image please be removed. Thank you.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Perhaps instead of requesting censorship you should in turn post an image of an atheist standing in a pit of fire.
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Awww, poor douchenozzle iz butthurt?
Get in line ftard…
(rolls eyes)
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Well done.
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Hah! Funny pics! You guys should do such articles more often. XD
btw, greetings from reddit.
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Happy Zombie Jesus Day!
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Jesus has been dead for thousands of years. When you die, you will become compost, and nothing more. GROW UP YOU FUCKING STUPID CHILDREN!
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Well actually, there is no evidence outside the bible that jesus or anyone like him ever really existed. These are myths, plain and simple. Not only do christian morons have to give up having invisible friends, they have to give up the hope that this guy did lived and did die for them. He didn’t. Christians, like the rest of us, are on our own.
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These Christians continue to disrespect our ancient Anglo Saxon godess Eostre with their god and jesus mythologies, I find their attempted assimilation of our spring fertility ritual to be highly offensive. I think it may be because they are afraid of hard work and are simply trying to infect our pure bodily fluids with their prevert religion!!!
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Thank you for such a well thought out and written piece. I needed a good laugh this morning, and your “Please order your women/children to exit the room before review” comment had me on the floor howling in laughter.
The Bible was written, edited, and twisted by man.
If Jesus did exist, he was just a normal guy trying to do good things for people. A socialist, if you will. …and yes, you might want to read up on the definition of socialism and communism.
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Haha love the video. And thanks for the great pics I can share on FB now!
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Haha, thanks for the pictures, these are a gold mine i will continue to use into the future for my zombie jesus purposes.
Also you said over 2000 years ago today, it was over 2000 years ago friday. Learn2Christianity.
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hahahaha, oh man.
You guys know what keeps me going? The churches are losing numbers, drastically. In another 100 years, religion will be the minority.
100 yeas is an estimate, but you get the picture. Religion will slowly lose it’s control over people’s minds, and in turn, the government. This will finally free as all from the mental slavery, oppression, and hate religion brings.
All Praise the FSM!
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ANd Maybe the world will be at peace after the Religion Nutsjob Got vanished in history
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2 Timothy 4:1-5
1 I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom; 2 Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long suffering and doctrine. 3 For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears; 4 And they shall turn away their ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables. 5 But watch thou in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, make full proof of thy ministry.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Well of course it was prophesied. When you make something up so preposterous as christianity, you expect that people will mock it in disbelief. Nobody believes Godzilla is real because it is just too fantastic.
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When you rely on a rule that basically says “If you disagree with me, that proves I’m right” you immediately fail.
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A reasoned pick from the bible, however, I present a theological exercise to you:
When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.
-Stephen Roberts
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This needs to be read, re-read and understood by all believers.
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Happy Zombie Day everybody!!!
ps. if we really wanted to be morally repulsive,
we could have just quoted scripture from the buy bull.
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Here is one I made a few years back… happy Zombie day!
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Okay this is going over the line. I am offended so someone please do something.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Well, many of us are deeply offended by christianity, won’t somebody please do something?
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I am deeply offended by your theft of every religion you come across in order christianize it. Someone please do something.
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Okay…
(sets offended person on fire)
There ya go…you’re happy now, right?
lol
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Wow, this is over the line.
Carry on.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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the disrespect displayed by the religious is far more dangerous than mere poking fun. pretending to always have the upper moral hand simply by claiming your way of thinking is 100% truth based on no observable evidence is simply fraud. YOUR little invisible man club has wiped out entire people, raped and pillaged, and spits venomous hate-speech towards different or poorer people – whom you were instructed to love by the savior you laud ad nauseum! it’s really sickening to anyone who truly tries to step outside the box and observe it for what it is: child abuse and stifling people’s freedom.
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This author is a hypocrite. He bad mouths atheists left and right then whines that we’re mocking his beliefs. What a crock of golden calf manure. At least we’re just making fun of your beliefs we don’t then condemn you to hell, we don’t condemn you to hell because…surprise…there isn’t one.
And I see you still want to treat women as the weaker sex with this line: Please order your women/children to exit the room before review.
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Christians are all misogynists.
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Bawww, Happy Zombie Jew Day.
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Atheist circle-jerk! Yaaaay!
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Well, you did steal the holiday from the Pagans. Took the celebration of the goddess of fertility, Eostre and made it into the celebration of death. So why not make fun of the stolen holiday?
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first off i would like to say thank you for all the laughs it was great
second Please order your women/children to exit the room before review.
i am offend by this i am a woman i can handle reading this all on my very own thank you and kindly piss off if you think i will allow any man to order me away from reading or viewing anything
third
i am so sick of having Christians ram there beliefs down my throat and continuing to tell me just because i do not believe in there so called god i am going to hell. you can take your moral high horse and shove it for all i am concerned. who are you to judge anyone? if i am not mistaken is that not a “sin” to judge other people in your little book of guidelines way to go your actually going to your own hell for being a retard.
welcome to 2010 were most of us have opened our eyes and found out that we can think for ourselves and what we were told as kids is bullshit.
happy zombie jesus day everyone
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Happy Holy Zombie Day!!!
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Easter is about love and respect
Oh, if only that were the case! Easter is about eggs and buying shatty presents for your kids, and dying eggs. It’s the attempt of Christianity to subvert the pagan holiday of life at the spring equinox, which worships new life and reproduction of springtime, thus the eggs and bunnies. (have you ever wondered where Jesus fits with eggs and bunnies?)
Christianity is NOT about love and respect, either. Just ask the poor gay couples who cannot marry the love of their life about the love and respect they feel, or the interracial couples just a generation ago who couldn’t, either.
If you want a rap of love and respect, you should start by loving and respecting people!
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So let me get this straight. Your god is awesome and all because he came down in human form to make a blood sacrifice to himself to appease himself for the sins he allowed for his own creations to do, and this is somehow a respectable idea?
We mock because we understand just how ridiculous of things you believe. It’s not our fault you can’t see past your own ignorance. Maybe ask a few logical questions of your faith before you criticize us for having had half the wit to do so before yourself.
You don’t believe in Zeus, Bishnu, or Saturn. Why? That’s exactly why we don’t believe your’s.
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Is this site for real?
As a grown man in a globally connected world, how can this author really truly believe the pure hate that is coming out of his mouth? (or keyboard, I suppose!)
I think the Westboro Baptists have a pew with this fellow’s name on it.
Celebrate, atheists. Global atheism has doubled since 1990.
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>Global atheism has doubled since 1990.
For those who fail to recognize it, this is called evolution.
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It’s sad to know so many will burn in hell because they refused to open their hearts.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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I did open up my heart to zombie Jesus. But he ate it.
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best comment on here (that i bothered reading)
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He ate my heart and then he ate my brain…
OH NOES I MUST BE A LADY GAGA ZOMBIE!!!
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Open your mouth for me Amber baby. I love ugly women.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Would it make you feel better if Amber was forced to be silent or if she was forced to wear a veil? Seriously, you are way out of line, The Pope. It is completely acceptable to attack Amber’s ideas, but attacking her for being a woman makes you misogynistic.
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At the end of the day, Hell is all Christians have. The only thing that Christians can offer to those who don’t buy into the mythological tale is some sick revenge fantasy that was invented in the Bronze Age. That is because Christians know that they can’t rationally make the case for God or Christ or Muhammad or Buddha or L Ron Hubbard. They have to resort to horror stories.
Consider this the next time you condemn someone to the fires of hell. Once upon a time there was a man. He allowed his crazy cousin to build a torture chamber in the basement of his house. This man had children. The man was afraid that his children would fail to love him. The man said to his children, there is a torture chamber in the basement. If you don’t love me, I will allow my crazy cousin Lucifer to take you to the basement and torture you forever and ever and ever. At any time, the man could have stopped his crazy cousin. At any time, he could have shut down the basement. The man did neither one of these things.
Think about this. Seriously, think about it. Would you ever allow your children to be tortured for ever and ever and ever? There is no crime that they could commit that would warrant such psychotic punishment.
To be certain, you would cry if your children committed a secular crime and had to face a reasonable system of justice. That is not what we are talking about here. We are talking about an insane amount of punishment for no crime at all. There are people who are born, live and die without ever becoming exposed to Christianity. They get to burn forever. Consider all of Jews who died in Nazi Concentration Camps. They, also, get to burn for ever. This is monumentally unfair. And don’t tell me god is mysterious. There is nothing mysterious about being a cruel, sadistic monster.
There is a reason, of course, why you are far more moral and just than the god that you worship. The reason is that the god you worship was made up in the Bronze Age. He is not real. He is a poor work of fiction.
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Christianity is a religion that consigns most of humanity to eternal hellfire and unimaginable suffering and pain. Ultimately, 98% of every human that has every lived will be tortured forever, and 2% will be allowed to live with the God who is torturing the other 98%
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This should not make you sad. It should make you leap for joy knowing that all of us wretched sinners and blasphemers will get what’s coming to us: An eternity of horrid torture for a few years of badmouthing religion….because God loves us.
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What’s all the fuss about? It’s in the Bible after all…
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OMG those are priceless! Thank you so much for the laughs.
And hey if you’re allowed to tell me that jesus died for my sins, I’m allowed to tell you that you’re in fact wrong, jesus never existed.
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I don’t see why so many people, even athiests, have such a beef sometimes about the actual historicity of the man Jesus. They go as far as to mock religion and not hold any theistic faith, but question the historicity of the man and you’ll get shit?
Sorry, going on kind of a rant. But it’s refreshing to hear people say things like this. Jesus almost certainly never existed.
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Filth. Im offended and pray everyone who thinks it’s funny enjoys when they die how they BURN because Christ DIED TODAY FOR YOU MORAN. I guess what they say is true about a dog that bites the masters hand well just know when you are put down you get to have an eternity in hell.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Is this satire? What is a ‘moran’? Surely you don’t mean ‘moron’…?
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Abe how many dead people did you survey?
You know, you’re probably going to be reincarnated as a dog. That is too bad.
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This has to be a joke post. Just look at the avatar picture.
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I shared this with Amber. Now, I will share with you. You Christians sure do love to threaten people with hellfire and damnation.
At the end of the day, Hell is all Christians have. The only thing that Christians can offer to those who don’t buy into the mythological tale is some sick revenge fantasy that was invented in the Bronze Age. That is because Christians know that they can’t rationally make the case for God or Christ or Muhammad or Buddha or L Ron Hubbard. They have to resort to horror stories.
Consider this the next time you condemn someone to the fires of hell. Once upon a time there was a man. He allowed his crazy cousin to build a torture chamber in the basement of his house. This man had children. The man was afraid that his children would fail to love him. The man said to his children, there is a torture chamber in the basement. If you don’t love me, I will allow my crazy cousin Lucifer to take you to the basement and torture you forever and ever and ever. At any time, the man could have stopped his crazy cousin. At any time, he could have shut down the basement. The man did neither one of these things.
Think about this. Seriously, think about it. Would you ever allow your children to be tortured for ever and ever and ever? There is no crime that they could commit that would warrant such psychotic punishment.
To be certain, you would cry if your children committed a secular crime and had to face a reasonable system of justice. That is not what we are talking about here. We are talking about an insane amount of punishment for no crime at all. There are people who are born, live and die without ever becoming exposed to Christianity. They get to burn forever. Consider all of Jews who died in Nazi Concentration Camps. They, also, get to burn for ever. This is monumentally unfair. And don’t tell me god is mysterious. There is nothing mysterious about being a cruel, sadistic monster.
There is a reason, of course, why you are far more moral and just than the god that you worship. The reason is that the god you worship was made up in the Bronze Age. He is not real. He is a poor work of fiction.
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Hahaha. Burn in hell. The classic bullshit empty threat. The only hell there is is the one you live in right now. The hell you created for yourself by damning and condemning so many of your fellow humans. You are the personification of utter ignorance, hate, stupidity, and spite.
There is no hell. There is no heavan. Only this life. And I choose to live it to its fullest with my eyes WIDE OPEN. Now go back to your zombie worship and get out of my sight! Frigen retard…
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“order your women/children to leave”
For they are not strong enough to make a decision
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“God’s nation of America”? See, this is why we think you’re insane. You just made that up. It’s not even in the Bible. You’re just an egomaniacal nationalist.
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I think what Mr. Reagan said is the key to understanding this people.
2 Timothy 4:1-5
1 I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom; 2 Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long suffering and doctrine. 3 For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears; 4 And they shall turn away their ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables. 5 But watch thou in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, make full proof of thy ministry.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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I made this for Zombie Day
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Religion makes me lol. I’m so happy it’s fading away. On the bottom of this site is a section called ‘Moral Alerts’ and below it reads “Currently praying to decide who needs boycotting. Please check back soon.” Hahahaha. What an imagination!
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You call these people “childish,” yet you still hold onto the belief that your imaginary friend is, in fact, real, and created everything?
That’s a pretty childish belief. Once I grew up a little bit, I was able to separate reality from fairy tales. Apparently, you’ve just never grown up.
Happy Zombie Jesus day, everyone.
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“Please order your women”
Order? Your? Sorry, you don’t own them, despite what you may think.
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This one’s mine
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HAHAHAHAHAHA – This is a Cristian site and still slammed with anti-Jesus comments. You religious morons. What is going to happen when YOU die and there are no pearly gates, no St. Peter, etc. Grow up and take responsibility for yourself. There is no safety net. The sooner you realize, the easier your “transition” will be — and hey, if there is a heaven, etc., bonus! But to spend your “awakened” life bound by the rules of a book written by MEN a couple THOUSAND years ago is absolute insanity. Do you understand that this is FLAT EARTH mentality? Gawd you are all so stupid.
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“Buddy Christ” in a zombie walk… Genius!
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Burn! All you sinners will burn!
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Calm down.
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“Please order your women/children to exit the room”
Really? Women can’t handle a few parody images? That’s pretty damn condescending.
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Neither funny nor accurate. Christians who follow Jesus do not believe that Atheists will go to hell and be tormented forever. Its much easier and basic, non-believers will die and that is the end of their existence. Period.
Christians will live eternally with their Savior for believing by faith first. The greatest loss will be their life. Its really a simple choice to make. The choice is live for today or live forever. Easy! If you live a good, Christ-like life who does it hurt? When you die you go to Heaven. The other path is really for someone self centered, foolish and unwilling to see beyond today.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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People like you are the reason the Vatican is in chaos and shambles this week. Stop apologizing for the message of Christ and start teaching it.
II Timothy 2:15: Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightfully dividing the Word of Truth.
Nowhere in there are we instructed to pretend that gays will not burn in hell for having relations with those of the same gender and molesting children. Nowhere in there are we told we have to tell abortionists that it is fine for them to violate God’s creation by aborting developing human beings, lives ordained by God and removed by man’s knowledge of evil.
The scripture tells us not to be ashamed and to rightfully divide the Word of Truth. The Bible tells us to “go out into the highway and and hedges and compel them to come”.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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if Vatican is In chaos is because christian are a Bunch of sexual rapist pedophile Thats all
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“go out into the highway and and hedges and compel them to come”.
Lass near us got a right reputation for doing that!
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“A little less than 2,000 years ago today, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ laid down his life on Calvary so that all of our sins may be forgiven.”
yet this and all other sins are unforgivable… seriously god can’t just say i forgive you all and the punish us. basicly god himself gave us a free pass it’s in the bible and i can do whatever the fuck i please even if god exsist because he himself said he’ll forgive me.
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Probably only valid if we repent like all the other little drones…
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>Please order your women/children to exit the room before review.
Wow.
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Do you have the temperature data to show that hell is hotter than the sun?? Nothing personal, just a lot of people getting caught ‘cooking’ the numbers if you know what I mean.
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Have you actually read your own holy scripture? According to your own mythology, Jesus’ sacrifice was nothing. He sacrificed himself to himself in order to honor a law that he had made. However, it is okay. It was not a real sacrifice. After three days he comes back to life more powerful than ever before. He is like Obi Wan Kenobi.
That is a sacrifice anyone could endure. I would gladly suffer torture and humiliation and death if I knew that it would save the people I love and care about. By the way, I am not talking about some joke sacrifice either in which you get to come back to life after three days.
I’ll even go one better. The salvation would not have to be eternal. If I could just be assured that the people I love and care about live a long and productive life, I would gladly suffer the death that Jesus is alleged to have suffered.
Think about it. The mythical sacrifice was no big deal.
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Thanks for posting all of those great picture jokes. I right-clicked and saved each one to my computer….so now it is easier for me to wish people a Happy Zombie Jesus Day !!!
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Don’t forget….Jesus and God are as real as Santa!
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My favorite bit of blasphemy is the comic where God is endlessly reincarnated into the bodies of Moses, Jesus, Torquemada and Hitler:
http://www.needcomics.com/Locus/page/150/
The comic’s not all about that, but it’s in there. It’s a fun read, too.
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I actually wasn’t aware of this “Zombie Jesus” trend until you brought it to my attention. You’re making mountains out of molehills, and trust me; if anything, it’s hurting your cause.
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I can’t believe you missed this one…
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Why can’t women and children see it? Pretty Sexist, man The real Jesus was a man like any other. And sorry, if you think he was brought back, that’s clearly a zombie!
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Haha! These were great! Thanks for posting, I got a huge laugh! Happy Zombie Jesus day!
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The only actual offense of some of the Zombie Jesus material I’ve seen is that it’s not actually funny (though that German magazine cover is perfect). At any rate, on what basis should religious icons exist outside the scope of our scrutiny, criticisms, and senses of humor? Did you take this amount of offense during the George W. Bush presidency, throughout which he was victim of more mockery than anybody in our culture? I doubt it. And I don’t think Jesus should be talked about any differently; it’s also fair to treat Him as an adult. I personally am not interested in trashing for the sake of trashing, but people have had enough of religious bullying, and pushing back via parody and satire is not only more than justified, but also it’s far more humane than how most religious persons behave when they get angry.
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Serious overreaction. “atheists have no heart”
It’s a little joke. If you don’t like it, don’t watch it.
Atheists are entitled to their own views, as are the followers of every single religion. So just leave this alone. Don’t make a huge deal out of it.
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This article offends me, to think that all atheist are sin loving individuals is just ridiculous…maybe a bit true, but i don’t go around thinking there is no consequence to my actions, unlike the majority of christians who spend their days doing what they please and when the right time comes say “jesus you have found me” (and slowly sucks his brains afterwards). Please go back to the hole you rose from and let us feast on the inter-webs filled with zombies, games, and sexual deviancy.
Happy Be-lated Zombie Jesus Day!
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Reddit much be a left wing company! They pulled our link from their site!
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Jesus was not a zombie. On rising from the dead, he had intellect, a mind, and could converse. These are not the signs of a zombie; he may have been a Revenant or (very unlikely) a Lich, but he wasn’t a zombie. I’m going with Revenant, personally.
I suppose that makes me a splitter from the zombie cult.
So be it.
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Let me get this straight: You christians are upset that atheists are critical, via the satire of cartoons, of your religion. You think it horrible that we (atheists) make fun of your superstitions.
I would respond by saying I don’t think it funny that you (christians) have petitioned the legislature to enact laws in many states, in spite of a direct prohibition of it in the US Constitution, that prohibit atheists from holding elected or appointed office or from serving on juries. Are you afraid of free thought, rational thought?
Are you all as intellectually challenged as you appear to be? — Here’s a graph showing a correlation between adherence to religion vs IQ. It does not look good for your side.
http://images2.fanpop.com/images/photos/3500000/IQ-v-Religion-graph-atheism-3511654-510-289.gif
I do like the collection of anti-religious cartoons, however. Thanks! I added many of them to my collection.
Now, go suck the big one.
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Man, I miss George Carlin
I don’t believe in God more than I believe in Gandalf…they were both fictional characters invented by man
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It’s called freedom of expression, imbecile.
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“A little less than 2,000 years ago today, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ laid down his life on Calvary so that all of our sins may be forgiven.”
The common understanding is that it was about 2010 years ago, actually.
“How sick is it that there are people on Earth who after hearing the beautiful Passion story, they still try to deny Christ and even mock him? These new age heathens still dare to defy Christ, though now he is upon his throne in heaven and awaiting them to follow his love.”
It’s kind of hard to preset hard evidence for something that happened over 2000 years ago, which is why many people are not Christians.
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Liberal dogs.
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Woof Woof!
Too bad I like puppies.
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How about this? This is an actual published comic.
And while we’re on the subject:
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Hahaha
Those are a good laugh. And when I rot in the ground I’ll still chuckle at the thought of this site making a big deal out of an internet gag
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>>>>>>I’ve never actually heard someone suggest that contributing to the capitalist economy is the moral thing to do. I mean, what choice do we have? It’s either work or starve. Kind of like “gimme the money or I shoot”, no?
Not exactly. “Stop or I shoot” means I am taking YOUR money. “Work if you want to get paid” merely means I won’t give you MY money for nothing.
Of course, you can practice what you preach. I, too, want money without having to work for it. When are you sending me some?
Or did you mean it’s only unfair that people don’t give YOU money without you doing anything to earn it, not that it’s unfair for YOU not to give money to others without them doing anything to earn it?
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Remember that Paul rejected and persecuted Christians severely; that is, until he decided to spread Christianity throughout the worlk and throughout the ages. Any of you taking over?
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it has been while since i trolled here last time lets see…
Zombie jeesus… good good
billings ranting about morality etc. yep yep
things havent changed a bit…
FANTASTIC i can still say this
Mr. Billins
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Respect is a TWO way street.
“He who is without sin, cast the first stone”.
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Dear Christians
With all due respect (and you should really think about what I mean when I say that), shut up.
The zombie-Christ jokes will continue until your religion becomes at least marginally less ridiculous. Look to things like Buddhism for inspiration, which are at least vague and abstract enough that no one really knows exactly what they believe. It’s hard to insult a religion when you can’t pin it down. Frankly, I feel like the whole son-of-god, is-he-isn’t-he-dead bit is holding you all back. You should probably just write all of that nonsense out.
Keep all the parts about hell, though; they really attract the unnecessarily terrified to your cause. Leave in the whole instant redemption–>heaven, too. I feel like that appeals to everyone who’s ever murdered a person and wants eternal bliss anyway. Have you ever heard of FSM? Because their heaven has a beer volcano and strippers, and I think adapting some of those ideas might really help.
Sincerely,
A well-intentioned atheist
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ahahaha, hilarious post, thanks for the laugh. Oh you silly Christians.
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What makes you think that threatening other human beings with hell is somehow worthy of respect?
Your “Passion story” not beautiful, it is terrible, ridiculous and inhuman. You find human sacrifice beautiful? You find god demanding that forgiveness can only come from torture beautiful?
Wake up and smell the zombies.
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lol awesome! I’m so hosting a zombie jesus party next year!
thanks for the tip man!
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Man, this has gotta be the best site ever. Its interesting how the site has been overrun with atheists!
Thnx for the laughs guys xD
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I love how it says “ORDER all women and children to leave”. ORDER. Does the word “control” ring a bell? And your hypocrisy is astounding. “Quit offending us or you’ll burn in hell for eternity.”
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I feel left out, my zombie Jesus shirt didn’t make the cut.
http://www.zazzle.com/zombie_jesus_tshirt-235965351572029596
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OK….
I am not an atheist. I am a Druid. You want to talk about taking offense?!?!?! The holiday that the Christians stole from us is called Ostara. It is the celebration of SPRING. Where does the Easter egg, flowers, and Bunnies come when you look at the story of Christ’s resurrection?
Now, to be clear, I respect Christ’s teachings. HIS teachings, not all of the other idiots that came before him or that decided to undo all that Christ was trying to accomplish. Most of Christ’s teachings mirror those of the druids. So that everyone knows, the druids follow a religion that is over 10,000 years old.
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“Please order your WOMEN/children to exit the room before review.”
I am deeply offended by your sexist comment
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In respect to the article’s use of the German newspaper cover: Germans did not try to exterminate Jews, Nazis did.
Oh and PS as a nonpracticing Jew I’ve still experienced hate from Christians, so don’t go saying that Jews are Jesus’ “chosen people” when that is quite a hypocritical statement when it comes to a broad view of Christianity.
In the wise words of Gandhi, “I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.”
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You say that you hope Atheists “realize that hell burns hotter than the sun itself”. What are you suggesting by this? If you’re suggesting we will be manifested in physical bodies in hell (which a lot of Christians would disagree with), then any temperature equal to or greater than the temperature of the Sun would incinerate us essentially instantly – a quick death that many would be okay with. If you’re suggesting we manifest in hell as simply souls, away from God (which many Christians would agree with), then due to a lack of nerve endings, synapses and a brain, we would be unable to feel any physical pain induced by such temperatures.
I fail to see your threat.
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While I’m an unapologetic Atheist, I’ve got to say that–
Wait, what? In your link section:
“I Am Extremely Terrified Of Chinese People”
“The Golden Girls: How One TV Show Turned A Generation Of American Boys Into Homosexuals”
“Is It Ok For My Christian Daughter To Masturbate?”
…I’m just going to go ahead and say you’re a satire site. And if you’re not, I’m really ashamed to live in the same country as you all.
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“Please order your women/children”
really???? you jerk. I’m glad your taking the christian bible seriously. Do you sell your daughters too?
At least my atheist family that is based on humanism, not doing something because we’re afraid of going to hell.
Happy solstice and I hope you keep your pagan traditions alive.
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I am DEEPLY offended, not by these images but by this:
“Please order your women/children to exit the room before review.”
I will NOT be ordered around by a man, you disgusting sexist pig. I can handle a few satirical jokes.
It is no wonder more and more people are leaving Religion every day. Its people like all of you Christians on this site.
I looked around a bit on this site, and I am disgusted.
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http://www.explosm.net/comics/2008/
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Oops, my bad.
there
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i have no problem with the fact that i think religion is a destructive force. you people are foul. wake up and see the real world, we need to work together to make what we have here better. i find you all morally reprehensible.
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Its funny as hell that “good christian people” worship a god who condones killing women and children, rape, hatred towards women, slavery, says you should be a good slave, should worship other gods, should be stoned to death for silly things like working on sunday, and says that its ok to have sex with your brother’s wife just so long as you don’t cum on the floor? its all right here for the little bible thumpers who wanna call me a liar. Deut 25:11-12, Genesis 38:8-10, Deut 21:18-21, Deut 20:10-18, Ex 35:2, Lev 20:13, Isaiah 13:13-16, Exodus 21:20-21, Numbers 31:14-18, 1 Tim 2:11-12, Col 3:22-23, Luke 14:26, Deut 22:13-21, Isaiah 40:8. I can’t see how someone who has actually read the bible for themselves could truly be a christian.
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Great post Derek Van Buren! Thanks for sharing all the pics, they were great!
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Jesus died for my sins, and came back to eat my brains.
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“This one was very offensive and to whoever sent it, know that you will be judged with the gays, abortionists and NAZIs for that one.” Really, now? You group gays and abortionists with NAZIs?? That’s ridiculous. You’re full of hate.
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Wait…I looked at the rest of the site.. it’s satire, I think.
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Those pictures were hillarious! The video was kind of stupid, but I get the point they were trying to get across.
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What have these christians started?
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“Warning: The following images represent typical atheist depravity and are very offensive. Please order your women/children to exit the room before review.”
BAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Us Non-believers are going to Hell, yet you “ORDER” your women and children around???
BAHAHAHA!!! And you wonder why we have no respect for you close minded theists.
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DERPDERPDERPDERP
LOL JESUS IS DEAD.
HE’S GOING TO EAT YOUR MOTHERFUCKING FLESH.
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Can I offer a middle of the road opinion to this ‘discussion’? It’s fine to believe or not believe in Jesus, God, religion or the Easter Bunny. To those who do, Zombie Jesus is probably offensive. To those who don’t, it may be funny, crude, or both. The attacks from the Christians who say people will burn in hell aren’t likely to win any hearts and/or minds. And those people blasting religion as stupid and baseless could probably just “ignore” instead of “attack”. (Zombie Jesus isn’t going to get you!) Live and let live people. Worship your God, or your funny pages. It’s all good. No need for the name calling, threats, damnation and personal attacks. Although it does make this page even more interesting than stories about vagazzling and such.
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I don’t care if he’s zombie or not, I still love him. I want to eat his flesh and drink his blood just as much as he would want to eat and drink mine.
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http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-23103-Denver-Zombie-Examiner~y2010m4d3-Christians-venerate-Zombie-Jesus-on-Easter-Sunday
Here’s a piece, written near Easter, about the zombie Jesus phenomenon. The author is Catholic.
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i just glad that everyones gettting along
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Yes, the above content is sick! I was not raised in the church, nor did I attend as a child or young person. I did begin my journey with Christianity in my mid 20’s and I am so glad I did. Anyway, I am not sure why atheists feel they have to hone in on Christianity and try to tear it apart. Why do they want to stop Christmas, no one tells them they have to believe. If they weren’t convicted, they would just leave things alone, so obviously there is something inside of them that is fighting good (God).
Someone once said to me, just because you don’t believe something, doesn’t mean it isn’t true. So the atheists in this world can believe there is no God all they want, but it doesn’t mean there isn’t one. There is a saying in the secular world and the Christian world which is basically, you reap what you sow or it’s called Karma. They atheists are going to reap what they so, or bad Karma is going to come their way if they fight against their Creator.
When I think of how a baby is formed, I wonder how people can’t figure out that is the making of a creator much greater than we can imagine. You take an egg and a sperm and it forms a human body…how could that happen by a BIG BANG?
Of course this is my opinion and what makes sense to me. I’ve walked both roads and know I have been called to Christianity. I just wish the atheists would leave us alone.
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