Do Gay Pets Go To Heaven?
“What happens to Rover when he dies, Mommy? Will he go to heaven?” This is a question many a parent has heard from a weeping child. It’s heart wrenching but symbolic of the great affection little ones have for their pets. It also belies an early interest in the nature of Christian faith and many will agree it’s a wonderful thing to have your very own youngsters thinking about death and the afterlife.
Recently however, this dead pets issue has gotten much more complicated with the idea that there are “homosexual” or “gay” animals out there who may or may not be entitled to a place in heaven. Zookeepers have been spreading this controversial idea for some time now and their young visitors soak it up with equal abandon. Comedian Stephen Colbert even went so far as to celebrate this argument on his cable show “The Colbert Report” when he interviewed notorious liberal animal rights activist Jon Mooallem. So what should you say if your child asks you about death, homosexuality and pets?
Homosexuality is a sin in the eyes of our Lord. This is stated so often and so clearly in Christian texts that you should distrust the motivations of anyone who says otherwise. Many studies and thousands of years of human history have proven irrefutably that homosexuality is one of the sickest sins of them all. It is a denial of your responsibility to go forth and multiply and it is the key force behind the destruction of American primacy. The people who engage in these physical acts celebrate sin with their outrageously flamboyant lifestyles and lust for grunge and muscles, innocence and the fresh scent of teenage flesh. The gay man in America wants nothing more than to stuff your face in the musk of his indecency and they will stop at nothing to corrupt our teens, whether it be through the media, video games or children’s toys.
Is There Any Proof That Homosexuality Exists In The Animal Kingdom?
First of all, there is no widely accepted documented proof that homosexuality exists naturally in the animal kingdom. Jon Mooallem’s “Can Animals Be Gay?” article in the New York Times relies on some very biased and select evidence that many scientists and religious leaders would reject out of hand. The great failure in Mooallem’s premise is that he imposes human characteristics on the animal kingdom. It is no surprise that this writer is an avowed vegan animal rights activists whose agenda is closely connected to radical elements of the liberal movement. Furthermore, Mooallem comprehends very little about group psychology and emotions. Animals of the same sex do indeed spend time together. They do like games. They do co-habitate. That is part of being a little furry beast. To claim that two male squirrels that share a cozy nest during a bitter winter night must be having secret erotic homosexual sessions is just absurd.
Take this example: imagine if an alien were to visit the earth and watch a group of hearty football players on the field through his telescope. If this alien watched them jostle in the mud together and then run off to a steamy shower where they playfully gave each other slaps and shared a single bar of minty soap, what would this alien think? What if he saw them jump into their pickup trucks and drive home to a frat house where these able-bodied athletes bunked in close quarters, drinking beers together in their underwear on an old couch late into a warm, Southern night? If you’re not educated in the human experience and have no light of faith guiding you, one might dream that this is a same-sex scenario, but clearly that is erroneous and foolhardy. Being disconnected from reality and having a supercharged libido seems to be the curse of many of these so-called journalists and scientists today. They simply need to stop thinking about sex all the time.
One caveat: a handful of homosexual situations have been observed in the animal kingdom, but only in zoos. This is caused by the same “cabin fever” mentality that you find in prisons and is representative of the type of faithless liberal thinking that poses a genuine danger to American democracy. When you force creatures of the same sex to co-habitate for long periods of time, their natural expressions of heterosexuality burst forth. Animals are instinctively propelled to procreate. With no females in sight, some homosexuality has been known to occur amongst imprisoned animals, just like the Latin sex gangs in a super prison. This does not prove homosexuality is natural for animals nor for Latins. In fact, it proves just the opposite: that the natural inclination of males is to procreate so they may father children, even if there are no women around. In human prisons, this issue is complicated by the fact that the people who are locked away have sinned in the eyes of the Lord and against our laws.
The Gay Moth Controversy
When scientists are tempted to play god with the animal kingdom they are truly violating the commandants of our Lord. It is something that can send shockwaves through the human kingdom as well. In a most disturbing case, British scientists recently turned an entire species of moths into gays by spraying them with a special hormone. This is repulsive, particularly considering the old scientific adage that the flutter of a butterfly can set off a chain of events that can change history. In this case, scientists have made that flutter into an outrageously gay flutter, summoning male mouths into a frenzy of gay activity. In doing so, these scientists (who did not consult any spiritual leaders beforehand) threatened humanity’s future. They have created an unnecessary plague of homosexuality eerily reminiscent of the Plague of Locusts in Exodus. Interestingly enough, the Bible does not identify if the plague of locusts, that agency of divine judgement, is actually a plague of gay locusts.
What About Heterosexual Animals? Do They Go To Heaven?
Whether an animal is “gay” or not, the short answer to this question is no. Some Christian thinkers have tried to argue otherwise, but the Bible is very clear that God created animals to be the servants of humans. They are there to carry things for us and to be cooked as meat when we’re hungry. Some animals violate these rules. They serve no purpose for humanity; rather they distract and harass us. Beasts must serve humans and not the other way around. Some animals do trick their human masters into becoming helpless slaves, commanding fresh food and the central spot on the couch. As I have explored before, the cat is one of the most common offenders against the commandments of God and it is truly a sin for a Christian to own one. Maybe you should ask yourself why you need your cats in heaven beside you in the first place. Do you think you’ll get bored of God after awhile? Heaven is meant to be where we sit at the feet of our Lord and revel in his light and glory for eternity. We are not jumping around, planting gardens and feeding Fluffy. No, we are there to sit still and appreciate God. To ask if we can bring along a pet is akin to asking if you can bring your cat with you on a rollercoaster ride because you might get tired and lonely. It’s simply the absurd neediness of the weak-minded.
A side note on the Colbert/Jon Mooallem interview: It was terribly offensive for me to watch this greasy liberal propaganda machine turn out a new set of lies. These two charlatans rightly deserve each other with their hatred of reason and faith pooled up in balls of sweat on their pancaked faces. Jon Mooallem clearly has experienced the wide berth of depravity in modern America. He is obsessed with beasts and bestial sex and has no shame sharing his animal pornography with the world. This is a dangerous and illicit dilettante who enjoys dressing up and wearing makeup on national television. I am particularly disgusted by Stephen Colbert. His show has become even less compelling than it ever was. He’s a phony who is just phoning it in. He can barely look straight into the camera anymore without laughing at you. He truly hates YOU! He laughs in your face as he cashes your checks for the millions upon millions that he’s stolen from America’s wallets and from the good intentions of our economy. This man wants nothing more than endless and obscene self-gratification and like the worst sort of exhibitionist, it needs to be witnessed by as many people as possible. And there you people are, in the audience! An audience paid to clap and howl at every shift of his grimy grin but even I can tell that THE JOY IS GONE! Colbert’s audience is really just celebrating repetition and monotony these days, craving the slimy comfort of a familiar blanket. Colbert holds up a mirror to the pathetic, under-employed children of America every night and tells them he loves them. These children in turn are desperate for his affection, as they get no love from an economy that does not embrace laziness and drug addiction, from parents who reject radical lifestyle choices and sex perversion, and from a God who does not barter with homosexuality and egomania. You nasty people truly deserve each other.
http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/270727/april-13-2010/jon-mooallem
- Sinful
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- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Stephenson Billings
Stephenson Billings is an Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children's Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector all in one special, blessed package! Facebook me here or Fanmail me: StephensonBillings@yahoo.com !
6:05 pm
is this really relevent? gay pets are you serious? come on billings your a joke your journalism is no more better than my own shit and if your a “highly respected” journalist which companie’s do you work for as a journalist and do you have any real qualifacations as a journalist? As i can see your a “child entertainer” aka your a pedophile so i take you have never worked as a journalist in your entire life and since your doing this as a non profit rant you are sir a blogger.
have a nice day
may a random guy rape you anally and that will no doubt be this guy
http://www.blackheartgoldpants.com/images/admin/chrishansen.jpg
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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5:26 pm
Yuske, everything to do with living a good and charitable life is relevant to me. I care about people with ALL MY HEART! I am full of love. Why is that so wrong?
Hot debate. What do you think?
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6:15 pm
so you love me do you?? i knew it i knew you were gay from the beginning man i love harrasing you whenever i post shit up on this site which has no real news credibility whatsoever makes you even more of a joke but the fact that you want my cock scares me a good fair bit
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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6:18 pm
“i knew it i knew you were gay from the beginning man i love harrasing you whenever i post shit up on this site”
ment to say whenever YOU post shit up on this site apologies for the spelling typo
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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8:45 pm
My love is spiritual. The love of Jesus Christ is spiritual. It transcends the physical. You should really try it, it opens you up and brings peace of mind.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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6:07 am
thanks but no thanks
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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10:52 am
If you truly loved, you wouldn’t go around peeing on other peoples ruggs, and causing trouble, over gay pets no less. Cosentual adult homosexuality causes you no harm, yet you attack it, then you the attacker try to invoke love? Being intrusive and intollerent is not love, creating space for violence to flourish is not love. There is no such thing as sin in reality, but there is karma, your actions have negative impact on society, propped up only by a collection of fairytales, disharmony and hate are the products. Is that love?
So if any of you out there are tired of peeing on other peoples ruggs, and are looking for truth in spiritual loving, there is many paths you could follow, try Buddha or Tao, or even just kick back and abide like a Dude.
Laters
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1:12 pm
I can’t believe this article exists. How stupid. Uber-Christians are scary as hell.
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8:40 pm
People who believe this crap aren’t Christians. They are idiots.
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1:54 pm
Having read your article I think its probably reinforced my long-held suspicion that homosexual behaviour can be detected in all of God’s creations. I used to be a moderate Christian and member of the Free Presbyterian Church (due to my Scottish ethnicity), and practised my faith relatively quietly. However the revelation that my brother was involved in some sort of homo-filth-ring mobilised my faith – I was so angry I set up a small local group to try and tackle the spread of gay establishments in my city. So far we have completed one shutting-down of a bar near my home, using guerilla tactics. This included offering prayer insistently to any men in the vicinity of the bar holding cocktails or any other such beverages which we deemed effeminate and most likely filthy homo rimmer-juice. Most of the time we were treated like lepers, but we fought our way back and eventually we persuaded my brother that he had gone off the rails by hanging out with these people. So, thats the essence of my fag-hunting experience and I hope i will inspire others to follow….DON’T LET FAGS GET YOU DOWN! If you’re going down your local bar, you know, talking to guys like normal guys and about baseball and suchlike thats fine but when you get home and your wife smells a fuckin Cosmopolitan on your breath YOU GOT PROBLEMS, BUDDY! Phew, sorry I got a lot on my mind guys!
Hot debate. What do you think?
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2:27 pm
Long time reader – first time writer here. I was so strongly moved by Mr. Riewoldt’s conviction and faith that I have been compelled to say – Jesus praise you sir! I have been following the serious topic of animal homosexuality for a considerable period of time, and have spent many an evening dwelling on the scourge that is the homosexual beast (human and animal, there is no difference in my opinion).
Dwayne has nailed the faggot right on the head here, militant action is now the only available option to oppose the pestilence sweeping God’s once-beautiful earth. If I have one small reservation with Dwayne’s activities, it would merely be that he has told us nothing of the severe punishment I hope his disgusting brother received. Talking is not enough anymore, we need to PURGE THE FAG IN A BLAZE OF RIGHTEOUS FURY. I MEAN ANYTHING – BE IT TORCH, BURNING CROSS, SCORCHING FIST OF GOD’S WILL. I have recently taking to tactics of inveigle – luring the faggot with a sly beckoning glance, leading him to the bathroom – and proceeding to remove any remnants of his ‘masculinity’ with my cruciform Sabre.
YOU HAVE THE RIGHT IDEA DWAYNE, BUT I IMPLORE YOU TO FURTHER YOUR INTENSITY! GOD SENDS HIS LOVE TO ALL TRUE BELIEVERS
Hot debate. What do you think?
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7:29 pm
wow, this borders on the zealout hateful propaganda of a muslim extremist, well done sir.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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7:23 pm
Wow … to Nigel and anyone else who would say homosexuals need to be purged with fire – you’re sick. Honestly, sick. Do you really think that’s what God wants you to do? Is not murder also considered a sin in the same bible?
Sick, sick, sick.
I think you’re in for a rude awakening when you reach judgement day and are damned for the hatred in your heart.
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5:02 pm
So it’s a sin to own a cat now?? lol. That pretty much condemns half of the population of current church goers, the old widowed blue hairs.
I wish for the author’s sake that this articule was a joke, but sadly I think he is serious.
For me, just reading the titles of other articles on this site is enough to brighten the darkest day. How to spot a masturbator?? really? You mean other than that guy with his hands in his pants wackin it at hooters? Or maybe its anyone who is Chinese, drives a Buick or enjoys horseback riding.
Yeah, I’m glad you’re here to help us out with that one.
Tiger Woods is Cured of Whores? Now we know everything on here is total BS. It’s like opposite land.
The Golden Girls is also a personal fav. I think this site hates old ladies the more I linger.
I also love how the site calls some articles “Blessed This Week!” Blessed, by whom, praytell? You surely don’t mean good ole YAHWEH. I would hope that even he would have better things to do then support your wildly ludicrous propaganda.
What really gets me is that It’s as if the people who run this site don’t realize what a mockery they are making out of their own faith. I guess that’s what makes Christianity it’s own potent brand of lifetime crazy. In the end, I don’t know whether to pity then a little or just keep laughing.
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3:07 pm
You’re full of LOVE? Dude, even your thumbs down system is “condemn”. Disagree not strong enough for you? “Condemn”?
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4:04 pm
You don’t love people – you hate homosexuals – they’re people. More open minded, well adjusted people.
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1:45 pm
You say you’re full of love, yet the only thing you showed in this entire article was hate. Isn’t it true that we are supposed to leave judgement up to God? Because correct me if I’m wrong but you’re judging pretty hard.
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2:53 pm
I am speaking out about the moral decline of this country. I am sharing the teachings of Jesus Christ. Is that what you object to? As for judgement, the Bible asks us to be ready to be judged if we judge others. I am prepared for that. Your argument fails if you expand it to the idea that we should not judge rapists or murderers. Of course society needs to collectively condemn those who cause harm.
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4:03 pm
//I am speaking out about the moral decline of this country.//
No, you just want attention because you hate being ignored.
//I am sharing the teachings of Jesus Christ. Is that what you object to?//
Jesus didn’t say that everything that wasn’t him should burn, so I don’t know what the hell kind of teachings your following.
//As for judgement, the Bible asks us to be ready to be judged if we judge others. I am prepared for that.//
So you WANT to go to Hell, am I right? Not only that, doesn’t your judgment equate to jack shit compared to God’s? Shouldn’t you just shut the fuck up because all you’re doing is hating people for the sake of hating them?
// Your argument fails if you expand it to the idea that we should not judge rapists or murderers. Of course society needs to collectively condemn those who cause harm.//
Sins do not equal crimes asshat. Your bible promotes rape and murder. And if you believe that we should condemn those who cause harm, then we need to lock you up, and put into a damn loony bin so you don’t hurt yourself or anyone else.
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8:47 pm
Pardon me, but Jesus says nothing about homosexuals in the bible. And I’m sure Jesus loves cats, too.
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1:16 am
I never understood the fundamentalist christian desire to hate so much. Did not Jesus say to turn the other cheek, love thy enemy, and forgive them for they know not what they do? Did he say “hate them, loathe them, yell at them, suppress them, lie about them?” Why cannot christians follow the words of Jesus…? Do you not see that every hateful argument you set forth, whether in reply to such or not, only creates more hate? Saying you love people with all your heart… then why does all your other words say the opposite?
If you are wise, listen to this story: A soldier once approached a famous and respected zen monk, and asked him “Where lies the gates to heaven and hell?” The monk looked at him in disgust and said “Who are you, a common man of such foul profession, to ask me these questions, you who are nothing but a…” etc.etc. After some verbal abuse, the soldier could not control himself anymore, and grasped his sword in anger. Then the monk lifted his finger and said “There lies the gate to hell” The soldier understood, and sheathed his sword. “And there, lies the gate to heaven” said the monk.
Although not a christian story, you must surely see that this is well in line with the teachings of Jesus. Do you not see you are the soldier, but without the wisdom to sheathe your sword?
And where did Jesus say it’s wrong to be gay anyways? I suspect that must be old testament stuff… Let me ask you this: Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?
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11:08 pm
Take this example: imagine if an alien were to visit the earth and watch a group of hearty football players on the field through his telescope. If this alien watched them jostle in the mud together and then run off to a steamy shower where they playfully gave each other slaps and shared a single bar of minty soap, what would this alien think? What if he saw them jump into their pickup trucks and drive home to a frat house where these able-bodied athletes bunked in close quarters, drinking beers together in their underwear on an old couch late into a warm, Southern night?
if you wrote this, i think you might be gay buddy. warm southern night? you gotta be kidding me. this has “erotic supression” written all over it.
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12:20 pm
You are an idiot. Are gay pets getting into heaven. Is this really even worth a debate. Sure there are gay animals and homosexuality has been documented in every mammal known on earth. If your God made them why would he make them this way. Surely if we consider the big brain theory these animals would not know any better. Needless to say would it be wrong to consider they were born this way. I think you need to get your head out of your ass and read a book other than THE book which by the way was written by common man who was obsessed with power. Religion was the very first installment of government and that is all it will every be. Nothing but a game of power and control. The Pope was the richest in all the land when he came up with such an idea. He has had you guys tricked for centuries with this modern day pyramid scheme. Paying tithes to a church geesh! Why would God even consider that? He has no means for money. He fricken turned water into wine right. Wish I was smart enough to come up with such a hoax. Evolution is all around us and you seriously need to get with it. I guess he made all the other planets and the different life forms that we have yet to discover as well too huh. Get real! The faster people realize that it is people like you that hold the world down from discovering the true meaning and reason for life the better.
Hundreds of years ago they told everyone that listen to secular non traditional music they were all going to hell. Well I listen to jazz in my car every morning. Guess Ill burn in hell with the rest of them. It is ridiculous for you to hold on to these values. There are over a hundred different religions and sects of religion in this world and just about every one thinks the other is going to go to hell. So if there is no true way to know which religion is the right religion then why bother. Surely every religion does not have its own heaven. I urge you to stop being so ignorant and look out at the world. There is a lot more going on then your silly little belief.
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6:23 pm
Even though I don’t believe in heaven or hell, good animals will go wherever they want to go when they die, just as good people will. And there’s nothing “bad” about homosexuality, so there you go.
“Homosexuality is a sin in the eyes of our Lord.”
So? What relevance does that have to the 21st Century?
“This is stated so often and so clearly in Christian texts that you should distrust the motivations of anyone who says otherwise.”
In other words: don’t trust anyone who’s not a Christian. That’s pretty fucked up, dude.
“Many studies and thousands of years of human history have proven irrefutably that homosexuality is one of the sickest sins of them all.”
What about murder, rape, stealing? You know, things that actually HARM other people?
“It is a denial of your responsibility to go forth and multiply”
As I’ve said before, you don’t seem to be in any sort of hurry to crank out the kids, Billings…you seem to be backing out on your “responsibility”, there…
“Is There Any Proof That Homosexuality Exists In The Animal Kingdom?”
There’s no proof but there’s a heck of a lot of evidence…
“One caveat: a handful of homosexual situations have been observed in the animal kingdom, but only in zoos.”
I’ve observed it many times in the animal shelter I volunteer at, some between intact cats and some between NEUTERED cats. There was no sex involved in any of the cases, but each time the two male cats cuddled up together and bathed one another. It was absolutely adorable and very sweet.
“When scientists are tempted to play god with the animal kingdom they are truly violating the commandants of our Lord.”
How many times do I have to say this? NOT EVERYBODY BELIEVES IN GOD.
“It is something that can send shockwaves through the human kingdom as well.”
There is no “human kingdom”. There are the kingdoms Animalia, Monera, Plantae, Fungi, and Protista. We are in Kingdom Animalia. Learn some biology, goddamn it.
“This is repulsive, particularly considering the old scientific adage that the flutter of a butterfly can set off a chain of events that can change history.”
1. Moths are not butterflies
2. Stop watching so much Jurassic Park. That movie is too intelligent for you.
“In doing so, these scientists (who did not consult any spiritual leaders beforehand) threatened humanity’s future.”
Why should they have consulted spiritual leaders?
“Whether an animal is “gay” or not, the short answer to this question is no.”
Oh get your head out of your ass! Animals deserve eternal glory just as much (or perhaps MORE THAN) people do.
“They are there to carry things for us and to be cooked as meat when we’re hungry.”
Animals are on earth for the same reason as us: they survived natural selection. Now all they need is love, and humans are there to provide it for them
“Maybe you should ask yourself why you need your cats in heaven beside you in the first place.”
Maybe it’s because people LOVE their cats! Ever consider that? Just because you’re an obese, ugly, greasy pedophile who’s never gotten a woman and lives alone doesn’t mean that the rest of humanity doesn’t know how to love.
“Do you think you’ll get bored of God after awhile? Heaven is meant to be where we sit at the feet of our Lord and revel in his light and glory for eternity. We are not jumping around, planting gardens and feeding Fluffy. No, we are there to sit still and appreciate God.”
Yes, that sounds pretty goddamned boring.
“To ask if we can bring along a pet is akin to asking if you can bring your cat with you on a rollercoaster ride because you might get tired and lonely.”
Wow. Horrible analogy, considering how the average rollercoaster lasts only several minutes.
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6:30 pm
wow thats just awesome!
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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3:55 am
“Do you think you’ll get bored of God after awhile? Heaven is meant to be where we sit at the feet of our Lord and revel in his light and glory for eternity. We are not jumping around, planting gardens and feeding Fluffy. No, we are there to sit still and appreciate God.”
Is it just me, or does this bit sound a lot like being god’s slave to you? I ask you, because I love how intelligent your post was, and wish to know your opinion.
**To Billings**
If heaven is supposed to be eternal bliss, why CAN’T we jump around, plant gardens, and enjoy the company of our pets?
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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1:56 pm
BUDDY WISE UP! Stop playing with you pet’s gooch!
Much respect, D. Riewoldt
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4:02 pm
1. Learn some grammar you inbred piece of shit trailer trash.
2. Do yourself a favor and stop trying to hang around these “Billings” types.
I used to be a catholic, I went to Catholic school for the majority of my life, and believed in Catholic ideals. But its because of people like Stephen Billings, who hate blindly and refuse to look at physical evidence of our world, and instead shit out this propaganda onto easily accessible websites, where they can be absorbed into the spongy, developing brains of our youth today, that I have abandoned my faith.
And whatever you wish to say, Billings or your horde of uneducated, heartless, vindictive followers, go ahead. All I know is that God is the final judge, and I will worship the day when you realize, standing at the Pearly gates, that you fucked up your life. And when St. Peter takes his big old rubber stamp of judgment, sticks it into the blood red ink, and stamps a big fat “DENIED ACCESS” on your transfer request to heaven, I would take eternal damnation just to see your face, caked with sweat and grease, as it filled with tears for the piece of shit life you lived. You can spend all of eternity in the basement of the Universe, with the boiler turned on high.
But Billings, have you heard the GOOD NEWS I have for you? I know a guy who had pretty similar views to you in some ways that you can spend eternity with. He hated the gays. In fact, like many of your followers on this website have said you should do, he burned them. In furnaces. Along with anybody else who he hated, like the blacks, the Jews, and probably some cat owners, because we all know that cats are the demon seeds of Satan and have been sent to the planet to corrupt men and women with their horrifying cuteness and their demonicly sunny disposition. His name is Adolf, but we all like to call him Hitler. You know, the one who went down in history as the most evil son of a bitch known to man.
But don’t worry, I’m not comparing you to him. I’m just saying that you two might get along well. I mean, its not like you are Jewish and he’s (probably) not gay, so you guys could hang out in Hell for the rest of eternity, maybe go play some football, jostle in the mud together and then run off to a steamy shower where you playfully give each other slaps and share a single bar of minty soap, jump into your pickup truck and drive home to a frat house where you able-bodied athletes (wow, I can barely keep a straight face at that one), bunk in close quarters, drinking beers together in your underwear on an old couch late into a warm, Southern night.
And once more, don’t worry. If you two lay with each other in a bed, maybe bathe each other, its not wrong. I mean, how can you tell the sex of a jackass anymore? It’s next to impossible with all the fur and your little parts.
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5:34 pm
Claire, I really don’t need to hear your pornographic stories from work and two cats sleeping beside each other does not mean they are homosexuals! How can you tell the sex of a cat anymore? It’s next to impossible with all the fur and their little parts. Anyway, I have to tell you this and it’s about time: you’re getting older Claire so maybe it’s about time you get your life on a moral, decent track. I know it was full to dress all goth and chase kittens around your home and kick old people in Harvard Square, but maybe you should think about buying some normal clothes like at Filenes or something, a nice pantsuit in a neutral color so you can impress a man and hopefully a man with a very good job and then you’ll be back on track to a house with a backyard in the suburbs and a few little Claires running around and you’ll be trading recipes with your neighbor’s wives… Otherwise I’m afraid you’ll end up smoking cigarettes with skateboarders and talking about atheism late into the night at loft parties and performance art shows and liberal fundraisers and gosh knows what else.
And yes, the humans can have a kingdom, why not? Who made you the Princess of Biology? Moths and butterflies and locusts look an awful lot alike so my literary license for that paragraph is still valid. Don’t be a fool.
And Heaven is not boring! It’s eternal bliss! The goodly understand that and would never, ever ask St. Peter if they could bring along their stamp collections and pet cats or whatever. That’s just nonsensical to me.
Heaven is like a lifetime of rollercoaster excitement by the way.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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7:17 pm
“How can you tell the sex of a cat anymore?”
Upon intake into an animal shelter the majority of cats are intact, therefore all you have to do is look for their balls. If a cat’s neutered, all you have to do is find its penis. Yes, they’re incredibly tiny and can’t be seen without a close-up physical examination, but it can eventually be found. The shelter workers, veterinarians, and vet techs are all trained to determine sex. They do so before the animal is sent to the adoption room.
“I really don’t need to hear your pornographic stories from work and two cats sleeping beside each other does not mean they are homosexuals!”
So then if two cats sleeping beside each other doesn’t make them homosexual, then why did you call my stories “pornographic”. And they do more than sleep beside each other. Sure, they don’t have sex, but they sleep ON each other and bathe each other.
“you’re getting older Claire so maybe it’s about time you get your life on a moral, decent track.”
Who are you, my father? Oh, that’s right, you’re a fat, lonely republican who can’t get a date let alone get a woman to sleep with him! And please tell me what’s so immoral and indecent about my life.
“I know it was full to dress all goth”
I’ve never been a fan of goths. Try again.
“and chase kittens around your home”
Sadly, I’ve never had a kitten.
“and kick old people in Harvard Square”
Where do you get off on lying about my life? I don’t kick anybody, let alone old people, although I’d certainly love to kick you. Tell me, why would a kid like me who gives $20 bills to homeless people in Harvard Square go around kicking old people? Why would a CNA, someone who TRAINED IN A NURSING HOME, kick old people?
“but maybe you should think about buying some normal clothes like at Filenes or something, a nice pantsuit in a neutral color”
I wear Karen Scott shirts and non-form-fitting jeans. In case you’re unaware, Karen Scott is considered to be “old people” shirts. That should speak volumes about the way I dress.
“so you can impress a man and hopefully a man with a very good job and then you’ll be back on track to a house with a backyard in the suburbs and a few little Claires running around and you’ll be trading recipes with your neighbor’s wives”
1. I’m a feminist
2. I can’t have children (not that I wanted a bunch of screaming, shitting little brats, anyway)
3. why would I be going to school to be a vet tech if I was just going to settle down in the boring ass suburbs and be a fucking goddamned housewife? I’m really ready to murder you now, so if you value your existence, stay out of my way.
“… Otherwise I’m afraid you’ll end up smoking cigarettes with skateboarders”
This just proves that you don’t know shit about me. I’m 19 years old, a virgin, never touched a cigarette, never touched alcohol, I go home to see my parents every weekend and I practically CRY if I can’t. Oh, and I fucking hate skateboarders.
“and talking about atheism late into the night at loft parties and performance art shows and liberal fundraisers and gosh knows what else.”
I don’t even know what a loft party is, but I stay away from parties of any form.
Stop acting like you know everything about me, because you don’t.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
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4
8:42 pm
You don’t kick old people? What about me? You kick me every day! I feel those heavy doc martens banging down on my decency time I click Christwire! You like one of those girl gang thugs who follows a respectable looking older gentleman into the Walmart parking lot and when no one’s looking you give him a boot to the tush and steal his perishables. I wuldn’t trust you for a second, you heathen harasser. And it sickens me you find your thrills in watching cats co-habitate and whatever else they do.
Clearly, I am not qualified to be your father. I’d need a police badge and a PHD in psychology to handle the likes of you day in and day out. Did you scream and bite as a child? I can just imagine the torture you put people through. Democrats are always like that. It’s like entering a hippie war zone. That’s why I’m a bit unsure about venturing up to Boston. I don’t know what I’ll find there (I’d probably feel like Charlton Heston in Planet of the Apes! Now Charlton, that was a man! For my generation he represented strength and virility and male power over women and he could ride a horse shirtless and dirty and still make you smile. He really made this nation proud. God bless the US of A!
Hot debate. What do you think?
5 
68
9:07 pm
“You don’t kick old people? What about me? You kick me every day!”
You’re the exception, because you’re a total asshole. And oh, how I wish I could kick you for real.
“I feel those heavy doc martens banging down on my decency time I click Christwire!”
What are doc martens?
“You like one of those girl gang thugs who follows a respectable looking older gentleman into the Walmart parking lot and when no one’s looking you give him a boot to the tush and steal his perishables.”
Only on the internet. In real life, I’m a quiet, shy girl who gets along with everybody and who’s often mistaken for a 12 year old. And yuck, I don’t go to Walmart. I’ve been in a Walmart once in my life, and that was in Cairo, GA to buy a pair of shoes for my grandpa’s funeral. And even more yuck is the idea of anybody kicking you in the “tush”. I wouldn’t touch your “tush” with a 39 and a half foot pole.
“And it sickens me you find your thrills in watching cats co-habitate and whatever else they do.”
I volunteer at an animal shelter! Once we’re done cleaning the cages and scrubbing the floors, there’s not much more to do besides play with the cats and watch them be cute. And seeing two male cats cuddled up together is just as adorable as seeing a male and female cat cuddled up together. What sickens me is that YOU find YOUR thrills sucking god’s cock in heaven. I believe you described it as a “rollercoaster”.
“Clearly, I am not qualified to be your father. I’d need a police badge and a PHD in psychology to handle the likes of you day in and day out.”
If you weren’t such an asswipe you’d see a very different side of me.
“Did you scream and bite as a child?”
When I was 2. What two year old doesn’t scream and bite. At least I didn’t eat crayons at age 15 like you did!
“I can just imagine the torture you put people through.”
Yes, I’m such a bad kid. So bad, in fact, that throughout my entire school career I have never been sent to the principal’s office or gotten in trouble with teachers. Don’t talk about people as if you know them, dipshit.
“That’s why I’m a bit unsure about venturing up to Boston.”
Good. Please stay away.
“For my generation he represented strength and virility and male power over women”
Guess what? This is the 21st Century. Men no longer have power over women. If you believe that men should have power over women, go live in Saudi Arabia, because here in America we don’t tolerate sexism. Hopefully you’ll get stoned to death for being too fat.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
60 
3
11:30 pm
Sounds like that guy really turns you on, Billings.
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0
1:45 am
“I care about people with ALL MY HEART! I am full of love.” This is far from evident in your speech. Waitta represent Christians everywhere!
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12:10 pm
Its so strange…if you don;t need sex in heaven, why does it matter if you are gay? Would it even come up? I don’t see how God could possibly care. Your version of heaven makes it seem like everyone turns into a quivering blob of pleasure once they die.
WE sit and just…drool i guess? For eternity? Eternal drooling? How could we get bored of drooling if we are with God? But gays, no gays are not allowed to partake in His holy drool.
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18 
2
1:37 am
“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ.” – Mahatma Gandhi
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21 
1
11:24 am
I may be way off-base here, but: are you a baby, Mr. Billings? Babies are easily frustrated, quickly angered, gullible enough to believe in the most wildly imaginative fantasies, and can’t tell or care when they’re being hypocrites.
Fortunately for you, you’ve found an outlet for your perverse rants and antiquated stereotypes. Most emotionally disturbed people aren’t as lucky.
Turn off the ’50s anti-homosexual propaganda films and take a walk outside. You’ll be surprised by the almost laughable–if not terrifying–inaccuracy of the descriptions you’ve chosen to demean the people you’ve decided to hate.
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6 
1
7:22 pm
“And yes, the humans can have a kingdom, why not?”
Why not? Because the five kingdoms are Animalia, Protista, Fungi, Monera, and Plantae. That’s NOT going to change. Take a basic biology class and hopefully the teacher will nail this into your fat fucking head.
“The goodly understand that and would never, ever ask St. Peter if they could bring along their stamp collections and pet cats or whatever.”
They could ask St. Francis.
“Heaven is like a lifetime of rollercoaster excitement by the way.”
And you know this firsthand? I don’t see what’s so goddamned exciting about bowing down before god, sucking his cock.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
36 
5
11:26 pm
This post makes me laugh so much! xD My 3-year-old brother is smarter than you!
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16 
2
8:43 pm
“Otherwise I’m afraid you’ll end up smoking cigarettes with skateboarders and talking about atheism late into the night at loft parties and performance art shows and liberal fundraisers and gosh knows what else.”
Ooh, that sounds like fun! Can I come?
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10 
0
3:41 pm
“And yes, the humans can have a kingdom, why not? Who made you the Princess of Biology? Moths and butterflies and locusts look an awful lot alike so my literary license for that paragraph is still valid. Don’t be a fool.”
Man, if we used your approach to biology the world would be a strange, strange place indeed. Each and every living organism would have its own kingdom, I would be crowned the Queen of Chemistry, swarms of locusts would be replaced by swarms of butterflies devouring our crops, and we would all be fools for not adhering to your beliefs.
To be completely honest, the only fool here is you, mate.
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8:04 pm
“They simply need to stop thinking about sex all the time.”
You first.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
53 
2
9:31 pm
“Homosexuality is a sin in the eyes of our Lord. This is stated so often and so clearly in Christian texts-” Yeah, about 3 times very vaguely. There are HUNDREDS of admonishments aimed towards heterosexuals i hope you know.. “-that you should distrust the motivations of anyone who says otherwise.” …and then you say that everyone should act like a 3-year old and plug there ears and go ‘lalalalala im not listening” whenever someone like me comes along? mature.
“Many studies and thousands of years of human history have proven irrefutably that homosexuality is one of the sickest sins of them all.” I’m pretty sure gods made very clear that not ‘loving thy neighbor as yourself’ is one of the sickest. Further, your link goes to a blog… You may as well have linked RIGHT TO the WBC’s site.
“…of your responsibility to go forth and multiply…” Worlds crowded enough already, dontcha think? ADOPT, keep kids from starving and dying in the street.
“The gay man in America wants nothing more than to stuff your face in the musk of his indecency-” WOAH WOAH. I wouldnt go within 50 MILES of most of the guys on earth like that, especially not a paranoid bald-headed old man like you. You’re essentially saying all straight guys want nothing more than to stuff womens faces in the musk of their indecency.. Way to shoot yourself in the foot. We have the same hormones, they’re just targeted toward different genders.
“-and they will stop at nothing to corrupt our teens, whether it be through the media, video games or children’s toys.” …Sorry, we dont corrupt buddy. is that also your logic for why gays shouldnt adopt? ‘Gays will only raise gay kids, i mean, OBVIOUSLY straight couples only raise straight kids’. nope, sorry, dont work that way.
I worked out several paragraphs worth of debate out of one topic on this whole “article” ..not worth my effort to keep going, so im gonna go post somewhere else now. ciao.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
33 
5
5:37 pm
Daniel, if you want to try homosexuality out and risk dooming your soul to eternal damnation then go ahead. But why would you want to do such a thing? Is a few weird sex acts and some fluffy interior decorating really worth Satan’s wrath? I don’t believe so. I would never risk something like that, not even for all the frills and muscles in the world. You really should think about your future, your eternity. And the teachings of the Bible are so explicit on the gay issue. Have you even asked your pastor about this? He’ll tell you very simply that it’s a terrible lifestyle and honestly, how can you defend sodomy of all things?
Hot debate. What do you think?
4 
45
7:24 pm
Hey Billings, isn’t your lack of progeny a violation of god’s word? Doesn’t that mean that you’re going to hell?
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
28 
3
8:34 pm
Hey it’s not my fault the right woman hasn’t come along.
Hot debate. What do you think?
2 
31
9:10 pm
“Hey it’s not my fault the right woman hasn’t come along.”
Yes it is your fault. You’re ugly and fat. Put the burgers down and maybe you’ll slim down. Your failure to modify your eating habits, thus your failure to attract a mate, is your own fault, and god will judge you for it.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
28 
2
9:15 pm
It’s funny that you say that. Today I went to the supermarket and they had a buy one get one free for tubs of chocolate ice cream so now I have two large tubs of chocolate ice cream in my fridge and all this food talk, well all’s I can say is that there will be one tub in that fridge come morning! “Laughing out Loud”!
Hot debate. What do you think?
6 
29
1:38 pm
The right woman apparently would have a penis. It’s clear by the reverence expressed for Chuck Heston, the value comparison of damnation vs. big muscles, and the weird stereotypical description of gay life (obviously distancing language) that Billings has not coped with own homosexual urges.
It is possible that he’s just lame and straight? Sure. But he has clear unsublimated homosexual feelings that he has not faced. Most men have these feelings; I’m a straight guy, for example, but any homosexual thoughts that have arisen have been dealt with frankly and openly, and I don’t have (much) anxiety about them. Having been raised in a homophobic milieu, it can be tough to get around these thoughts, but Billings is clearly not a 0 or 1 on the Kinsey scale whose issues arise strictly from his social mores. There is a deeper drive at work here. Remember Ted Haggard? Or any other closeted Christian fundamentalist and/or Republican?
Sir, deal with your true emotions. Don’t hide behind God or liberals or any other socio-political construct, because we’re simply too smart for that. Rail if you will against liberal intellectuals, but it won’t cure your cravings. They are not a thing to be cured.
Oh, and Bonobos have been observed in the wild engaging in homosexual play. Guess that blows your argument (pun intended).
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19 
2
10:08 pm
I’m not going to take the time to attack you personally, but in all sincerity and honesty, if Christ were to see what you wrote, he would give you a serious talking. Your message of hate and bigotry counters everything Christ preached. Your hateful heart and misunderstanding of his and G-d’s messages are frightening at best. And check your facts. The Bible never says what you claimed it does. Many religious scholars and leaders agree that the Bible is severely misinterpreted and misquoted (often by religious extremest such as yourself). If you wish to blog about such issues, you have every right to, but find the truth in the world, in the words of Christ and above all in the word of the Lord. You’re hate can only beget more hate.
Oh and last note, pedophilia and homosexuality are in NO WAY synonyms. Most homosexuals are appalled by pedophilia just the same as heterosexuals, to suggest that only pedophiles are homosexual or that homosexuals are pedophiles is not only COMPLETELY wrong, but you are also inadvertently saying that young women who suffered sexual abuses brought on my men do not exist. As a woman, I can say with 100% certainty, pedophilia is a human problem not a gay one. Please, again, get your research done.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
54 
2
5:39 pm
Oh RH! I do believe you have your own kind of faith, and me mine. How can we reconcile this? I will go back and study my Bible for inspiration but I think you have to be realistic. God is judging us each and every moment of the day. We really can’t mess up!
Hot debate. What do you think?
5 
35
8:19 am
I’m sorry, but ‘we really can’t afford to mess up’?
Isn’t Christianity set apart from all other world religions because it centers on what God has already DONE for US (sending Jesus to die for our sins), as opposed to what we must DO in order to gain His favor? You really can’t refute that.
As for your incredibly ignorant, misguided and, frankly, terrifying comments regarding both gay people and my poor cat, maybe you should remember that you are in no position to judge. Isn’t that God’s job?
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11 
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11:22 am
“God is judging us each and every moment of the day. We really can’t mess up!”
If this is true, you are in a world of trouble. Repent your evil anti-Christian ways. Stop using God’s word as a weapon.
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1:10 am
http://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh126/trenalisa/funny/laughingcat.gif
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3:40 am
This is a call out to everyone with a gay pet, or even a “couple”.
I have taken in 3 mutts that were thrown to the street because of this type of thinking, and am sick of it. What can we do that will show these people that there are “gay animals” in the world?. Is there nothing that will show them that these animals do seek sexual relationships with the same gender in the wild?
I believe they simply refuse it can happen in the wild, because if they accepted it with animals, they would have to accept a tiny possibility that it could happen with humans, too.
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21 
5
5:40 pm
I don’t find your anecdote believable.
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24
3:38 am
I’m not surprised. I’m betting that a pair of male dogs could be doing it right in front of you, and you’d blame the evil “satan” for it, instead of their nature.
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16 
7
11:24 am
He’d be too busy watching to worry about condemning.
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3:49 am
I also want to ask the “fans” of these people something:
Do you believe everything that the people who wrote the bible believed?
Do you believe that spitting on a wound cures it?
Do you believe that sea monsters are a legitimate threat?
If you actually do believe these things, you can stop reading, you aren’t worth debating with.
If you don’t believe those things, why do you insist on enforcing bronze age beliefs during the space age?
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24 
4
9:11 pm
I call poe. No self righteous Christian would use a profile pic that ugly. And gay pets are you serious?!
Praise or Condemn:
10 
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9:18 pm
I think it’s an important issue if you’re a pet owner. I’m a journalist, this is what I do, write articles. Everyone’s talking about gay pets these days so this work is an extension of a piece I did a few months back on felines:
http://christwire.org/2009/10/the-dark-underside-of-americas-obsession-with-cat-ownership/
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9 
10
7:20 pm
Mr. Billings,
First off, a REAL journalist goes out and researches the topic that they have decided to write about so that they have ALL THE FACTS and can CITE them accordingly to prove what they say is the truth and not just stuff they feel like making up because that’s how they think and believe. A TRUE Journalist would accept Citings made by their readers and INVESTIGATE them to see if what that reader Cited is Fact or made up too.
YOU SIR are NOT a REAL Journalist; in fact; Your not a real WRITER in all honesty. All you are is a Blogger for a web site that allows you to spout your foul beliefs and ideas to the populous and then sit back and enjoy the fighting that ensues. You FEED off the discord that you cause like a bottom feeder or even better yet; like a psychic Vampire.
Animals in the wild have a hierarchy that they follow. There is the Alpha who is the dominant ruler of their group and keeps everyone in check and control. Wolves are a classic example of this having an Alpha male and female who are the bonded/mated pair of the group, below the Alpha pair is the Beta and below the Beta is the Omega. Each has a Specific Roll to follow in the pack all designed to maintain harmony and peace for the pack as a whole.
Here is a Link that explains each one’s task in the pack..(Note I DO my RESEARCH before I write anything!) http://www.livingwithwolves.org/Gallery_Hierarchy.html Make Note that if you SCROLL down you will find Links in YELLOW that will take you to information about the Alpha, Beta and Omega of the Pack as well as other information about wolves in general.
Now, WOLVES are not the ONLY animals who form Hierarchies in their groups. All animals who live in packs/groups create with in their pack/group said hierarchy by establishing the Alpha, Beta and Omega’s of their group/pack. They do this through Mounting/Pinning down those who are weaker than them and holding them down till the other bares it’s throat or belly as a sign of SUBMISSION to the dominant animal. Once Submission has been established the dominant will allow the submissive to get up. This Domination by one another to many illiterate humans (Or homophobic humans) appears to be a sexual or even homosexual act. Thus the thinking…”Gay” pets/animals comes into play.
VERY FEW ANIMALS live alone in the wild, they form groups/packs etc to live together as a means for survival and protection. In the winters they curl up together in groups almost “spooning” their bodies around one another to share body heat. Mothers with young will quite literally wrap their bodies around their young to keep them warm and safe and in turn litter mates will cuddle together for the same reasons! Cats, Dogs, Rabbits, Goats, Sheep, Pigs, Horses, Wolves, Birds; Elephants etc; they ALL do this and biologists and scientists have been studying animal behavior for centuries proving this too!
So Don’t SIT THERE and Tell People that ANIMALS are GAY just because they curl up together or mount one another of the same sex etc. That’s like calling a MOTHER a Pedophile because she and your child of the same sex share a bed together and the reasons being could be anything from the child being very ill and the mother who’s natural instinct is PROTECT,LOVE and NURTURE her child through SICKNESS and HEALTH too; to the child having a nightmare and running to mommy’s bed for protection and comfort. It could be because they are on vacation and stayed at a hotel that had one room left that had a double bed in it and no roll away beds available. There are any number of reasons that I could list and the SAME would go for a FATHER too!
OH and I’m not interested in your reply to what I’ve said so don’t even bother replying because I will NEVER be back on this site again.
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6 
0
9:22 pm
You had me for awhile, but the gay pet thing …thats good satire.
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9:27 pm
I really don’t have to pay attention to fools like you. All you people want is to undermine and reject me, but what you dont appreciate is that the rest of America isn’t some New York City type of liberal haven. We are people with jobs and kids in school, mortgages and yes, we live with our traditions of face, passed down through generations. If you want to squirrel away and laugh at us so be. But we’ll be laughing at you at some point when you realize that we are the backbone of this country, we are the heartland of the agricultural economy, the steel workers, the factory workers, the people that fuel this nation. Whatever things you waste your days hating about American traditions, well for us that just makes us stronger. And oh yes, we vote.
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25
2:49 pm
saying he doesn’t pay attention to ‘fools’ like us. Yet, he has been defending his irrational stance to us…. how many times, now? He contradicts himself. How typical.
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11 
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2:55 pm
TBH, my friend sent me this link and I thought it was satire. This is such a ridiculous topic! I saw another one on Shrek McFlurry being gay or something? Like, common, people. Are you SERIOUS? REALLY!? Y’all have to relax and stop posting these inane blogs about Shrek semen and pets being gay which is a ‘sin’. My god, I can’t believe people are taking that badly misinterpreted book that simple farmers wrote 2,000 years ago, seriously. It’s the message that’s important. Honestly. Common, now. Time to wake up.
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9:25 pm
“It’s funny that you say that. Today I went to the supermarket and they had a buy one get one free for tubs of chocolate ice cream so now I have two large tubs of chocolate ice cream in my fridge and all this food talk, well all’s I can say is that there will be one tub in that fridge come morning! “Laughing out Loud”!”
You sound awfully proud of your gluttony. Gluttony is a sin, is it not?
You’re actually going against god in two ways: the reason why you haven’t produced children (having kids, according to you, is god’s will) is because you’re fat. You’re fat because you’re a pig. Gluttony is going against the word of god.
Congratulations, fatass.
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23 
1
9:33 pm
Don’t get so emotional, it’s only chocolate ice cream. You should try it once in a while!
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5 
18
9:40 pm
Oh, I see, so when you disobey god, you can just laugh it off. But when others disobey god, you call them sinners and other vile names. How typical.
And I don’t consume what I don’t require unless it’s a special occasion.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
27 
2
9:48 pm
Claire, you fail at trying to be a religious person. Eating ice cream is no sin in the eyes of the Lord. Gluttony is wanton excess, surrounding yourself with gold and uneaten meats, the indulgent parties of ancient Rome, the sexual perversion of Hollywood, etc. I had a little bowl or two, a tiny treat before bed time. You should enjoy life and God’s gifts a little more instead of being so angry at the world, so angry at the smile of your elders, a pretty flower on the street, the glory of His sunlight. You’re too young to hate America.
Ice cream makes me feel alive.
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3 
19
10:22 pm
“Claire, you fail at trying to be a religious person.”
You think I’m trying to be a religious person? HAH! I’m trying to expose your hypocrisy! I don’t give a dying moose’s last shit about religion!
“Gluttony is wanton excess, surrounding yourself with gold and uneaten meats, the indulgent parties of ancient Rome, the sexual perversion of Hollywood, etc.”
Gluttony: noun: “Habitual greed or excess in eating”. You, Stephenson Billings, eat in excess. You laughed at your consumption of two cheesburgers for dinner one night, yet that was gluttony. No person requires two cheeseburgers as nourishment, thus you eat in excess, THUS you are a glutton. You also joked that you bought two tubs of chocolate ice cream, but that there may only be one left over by morning. That’s not funny, that’s disgusting, and I wouldn’t put it past you to consume an entire container of chocolate ice cream in one night.
“You should enjoy life and God’s gifts a little more instead of being so angry at the world, so angry at the smile of your elders, a pretty flower on the street, the glory of His sunlight.”
God has nothing to do with ice cream; ice cream is a gift from the cows, not from god. And I can enjoy life just fine without indulging on fattening sweets and consuming more calories than my metabolism requires. I’d rather be in shape and have a good BMI than experience a few minutes of taste bud pleasure and regret it for the rest of the night. Oh, and I’m not angry at all, that’s just your arrogance making assumptions about who I am.
Fatass.
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22 
1
11:41 pm
Claire, many good Christians have a little girth. It’s the drug addicts and the perverts who always look a little too skinny to me. And all those models too, like Brad Pitt looks. WHat about them? Don’t throw your gluttony claim on me. That ice cream was delicious.
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5 
19
7:25 pm
“What? know you not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which you have of God, and you are not your own?”
Eating in excess is gluttony and violates the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you. You say its the drug addicts and models that are too skinny, but food is just as much a drug to an obese person as crack is to a crackhead. Giving in to the flesh is the same weather you masturbate, fornicate, excessively masticate
and on and on and on.
All people are sinners as defined in the Bible.. you or no one else on earth has any right to judge anyone else, that is left to God.
If this website is not a joke (which I think it must be … can’t imagine there are people that actually think the way you do) then you should all do us a favor and stop posting your ridiculous articles and responses to emails.
BTW – who the fuck cares if animals gay or not go to heaven. I only care if they taste good.
LOL ha ha ha ha
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13 
4
11:18 pm
backbone of the country you mean The church the church didnt bring anything to Any country in age
we vote … church are exempt of taxe and you are In politic if it,s was of me you will paid tax if you want to be in Politic affairs otherwise stay out of politics affairs
as for factory worker (technology ) most of them are atheist most of them are the Backbone of the country
Oh and By the way we don’t have all pastor a lot of crhistian has Priest
Praise or Condemn:
14 
1
12:08 am
“Claire, many good Christians have a little girth.”
Well, they’re selfish and greedy for eating more than they require.
“It’s the drug addicts and the perverts who always look a little too skinny to me. And all those models too, like Brad Pitt looks. WHat about them?”
Well, they’re not writing hypocrisy-laden articles about sinners, now, are they?
“Don’t throw your gluttony claim on me.”
Why not? You’re a glutton according to the definition. You’ve gone against god, looks like you’re going to hell.
“That ice cream was delicious.”
I really, REALLY don’t need to know what passes through your liver lips and into your mouth.
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1:01 am
stephanson your a fool, my goddess has a message for you lol
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5
7:47 pm
This site has to be the Onion News Network of Christian sites.
for those of you that don’t know the onion
http://theonion.com
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8
9:08 pm
Shame on you.
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8
11:40 pm
Are you kidding me?
Quote from this site regarding the Vajazzling trend:
“We cannot fully fault college girls for being a victim of their feeble, near-sighted minds. It is innate to the XX gene-set.”
LeAnne,
Maybe your feeble, near-sighted mind can’t see past your XX gene-set. I’m sure one of the writers on this site would tell you to go back to the kitchen where you belong. I, however, am not of that mind set, I think that you can empower yourself and you should see past the ridiculousness of most of these articles.
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5:53 pm
Maybe the “original sin” was that Adam wasn’t gay! Haha!
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0
3:19 pm
This article was so fascinating. I appreciate the fluxuation between things that feel relatively logical and the outlandish attacks, insults, and fear strategies. I’m currently teaching my students about fallacies, and I think I might use this article as an example.
What I found most compelling about this article was the extreme homoerotic diction used to reference gay men, their bodies, their sexualities, and their supposed culture/lifestyle. The author took his time to portray these people with lush, lustful, and sexual imagery. I notice that the author did not devote the same, or any attention, to queer women. Consequently, I assume that his obsession lies more within the realm of gay males and male sexuality. At many points in the article, the text read a bit like pornography.
This leads me to wonder about the author.
Simultaneously, the author uses many violent and hateful words that severely conflict with his suggestion that he is all about love.
Thanks for writing.
Well-loved. Like or Dislike:
32 
1
3:50 pm
you want homoerotic, you gotta read thisone:
http://christwire.org/2009/09/is-video-gaming-a-threat-to-americas-high-school-jock-culture/
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5:23 pm
Dear Professor, please feel free to use my articles as teaching aids. I’m sure your students will learn a lot.
All my love,
Stephenson
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9:59 am
billings you do realise he wants to teach them how not to argue useing you as an example?
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2
3:31 pm
please tell me you don’t teach people. you really are not able to recognize satire on the internet? idiot.
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11:42 am
First of all, Homosexuality is seen in Zoos due to the fact that these animals are being observed around the clock. It doesn’t prove that captivity leads to homosexuality. Even Jane Goodall who has watched gorillas in their natural habitat has seen homosexuality behavior. Untill you spend half your life observing a species first hand like she has in their natural habitat, you have nothing to back that theory up. Further more, in the zoos there are always males and females interacting with eachother (usually in perfect 50/50 ratio), and just like that, comparing zoo animals to same sex prisons completely collapses.
And God hates cats? Are you serious? No, ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? Just because they don’t take the trash out for us doesn’t mean they’re sinners.
Finally, you should stop and think about that fact that the human population is going to be touching base with 8 billion very soon. Then consider how the number of children dying from starvation is increasing, how the poverty level increases daily all over the world because of lack of population control and tell me how not having MORE children a sin?
God is love my friend, and if I choose to love a man, that’s GOD working in our hearts.
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4:42 pm
Ken, thanks for trying to respond to my article. However, I suggest that attempt to read it again. You clearly have missed so many of my obvious points. There is no standard 50/50 ratio of male to female animals in zoos. In fact, most gorillas are segretated by sex because males are known to particularly violent in captivity, so in general you thesis has no merit.
As for cats, did you know that none of the 12 apostles ever owned a cat? Nor did Jesus? There is ample evidence that “Cats are not for Christians”. I suggest you do some further reading before you bash all Christians with your hate.
Secondly, I am not a proponent of population control. This is something that the Chinese and the homosexuals seem to be conspiring for but this planet has ample resources if we just work hard and let our systems of trade and capitalism has their rightful way. Murdering children and families because you liberals want more resources for your nature preserves and Owl habitats is simply ridiculous. We are far from overwhelming the earth with humanity. In fact, I believe humanity is a beautiful thing! Sad you don’t agree…
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15
5:43 pm
They didn’t also have a dog, and you said dogs are good, not evil. So, you proved the oposite.
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5:54 pm
Julie, please don’t be silly. Your rhetoric is absurd. Dogs have a genuine history as service animals, helping humans in numerous ways from warding off predators of farm animals, to helping the blind walk.
Honestly, you should read this article which you’ll find truly helpful:
http://christwire.org/2009/10/the-dark-underside-of-americas-obsession-with-cat-ownership/
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9:44 pm
I agree that dogs can do some ”services” for humans, but sometimes they can be mean. Anyway, I don’t care. It’s just you freaking out so much just because you don’t accept your allergy for the cats, so you accuse Satan and all this stuff. And poor you that they pissed on your favorite sweather !! They are intelligents, they know you are an idiot.
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7:04 pm
Hey Dickweed (sorry, didn’t mean to get you excited) you’ve obviously never been out in the country or on a farm, and judging by what Claire says, you don’t get much exercise either. To say that cats aren’t service animals or don’t serve humans is absurd. Without cats the rodents would overrun the place, and without the rodents the cats wouldn’t eat. So basically they help us, and they help themselves at the same time.
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6:57 pm
Did any of the apostles or Jesus own dogs?
And yes, dogs have long been service animals, but your reasoning for why cats weren’t for Christians was that neither Jesus nor the apostles had cats, which has nothing to do with services provided.
And cats can be service animals, as well.
That being said, the worth of an animal should not be measured by how it serves humankind. With the exception of seeing-eye dogs and dogs that assist the disabled in other ways, we no longer require dogs to do work for us, so we can focus on loving them and caring for them. Whether you have a cat or a dog, a gerbil or a turtle, all that matters is that your pet is comfortable, happy, healthy, and that you love him/her.
There are studies that show that if elderly people, particularly widows/widowers, have a small furry companion to care for, their own quality of life improves. A fluffy little kitten can bring so much joy to an elderly person that the person now has more will to continue living, if only for the sake of that precious little creature. For many elderly people, if their little kitten or puppy is happy, they’re happy.
According to Christians, God created all creatures. That means that he created cats. Why do you show so much disdain for a creature of God, Billings?
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7:03 pm
Cats have always hated me, probably because of my faith. They scratch me, pee on my clothes and make me terribly allergic. Do you honestly think that’s right or fair? No, these creatures have had it out for me since my youth. When I see your photos, I think of a throat full of dander, my eyes blurring red, the awfulness that follows. Did I ever tell you the story about the cat pee in my bedroom that I could not locate? The smell drove me nearly insane! And those little kitties seemed to love it. That was a terrible stage in my life, my friend.
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22
8:09 pm
“Cats have always hated me, probably because of my faith.”
Not too paranoid, are we?
“They scratch me, pee on my clothes and make me terribly allergic.”
1. A cat will only deliberately scratch you if you piss it off. Since you most likely had a prejudice against them before you even lived with them, chances are you pissed them off.
2. Did the owner of the cats put enough litter in their boxes and scoop out the poop and pee every day? Cats (despite what lies have been fed to you) are very clean, VERY fastidious creatures who will find the most comfortable spot to urinate if there’s something wrong with their litter. There are also medical and psychological problems associated with improper urination. And, of course, they may have just not liked you. I highly doubt that they could sense that you’re a Christian, but they clearly detected some animosity towards them.
3. It’s not their fault if you’re allergic to them. Get some goddamned Claritin or Zyrtec and stop being such a pussy (no pun intended).
“Do you honestly think that’s right or fair?”
It’s not fair to the cats to be forced to live with a slob who doesn’t know how to put his freakin shirts away and who has no compassion for small animals.
“No, these creatures have had it out for me since my youth.”
That’s because you’ve had a bias against them your entire life! You’re a total dick, it doesn’t take Einstein to figure that out.
“When I see your photos, I think of a throat full of dander, my eyes blurring red, the awfulness that follows.”
Why should the poor cats suffer your hatred just because you were too goddamned lazy to haul your fat ass off the couch and buy some fucking Zyrtec?
“Did I ever tell you the story about the cat pee in my bedroom that I could not locate?”
Yes, you did, and I rolled my eyes.
“That was a terrible stage in my life, my friend.”
I’m not your friend. I don’t make friends with sexist, racist, homophobic dickwads who write articles condemning the animals that I adore.
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8:51 pm
They peed on my favorite sweater! How sick is that????
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21
7:02 pm
“did you know that none of the 12 apostles ever owned a cat? Nor did Jesus?”
So you know for FACT that none of the apostles nor Jesus ever had a cat. Even when they were a child.
You are really nuts. Certifiable. Not as a “investigative reporter”.. but as a mental patient.
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0
9:26 pm
GET…OVER…IT.
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3
11:41 am
Following Billings’ logic on cats, he should be eaten by a toilet.
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3
7:27 pm
HAHAHHAHAA LMAO LMAO
LMAO THE PART ON STRAIGHT PETS!!!
LMAO CATS
LMAO
the homoerotic bits about football players are nice too LMAO
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16 
2
12:46 am
Hang on.. is this parody or not? There’s no way this is for real.. but the people in the comments are taking this seriously..
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2:35 am
I know its lol as right?? The internet was made for this sort of activity. Love it. Watch the humans RAGE!
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9:52 am
I have 2 parts to this. the crap on being gay when you said the gay american wants nothing more than to corrupt our youth and blah blah blah. well i know alot of gays and i am gay and i have kids. i dont know anyone thats trying to recruite kids. you dont wake up one day and say your feeling gay today. idiots. your own kids are feeling that being with the opposite sex is wrong, and your heads are so in the bible that you often push them to suicide because they know you will never accept it. shame on you all. and that part about spotting a masterbater. i got a crazy lil verse for you jugde not and you shall not be jugded. you all often forget that God was talking about the human race, he wasnt leaving you all out. your crazy to think that. your a man, just like we are no where near God. but along the way you have forgotten that. why dont you post something about love instead filling peoples heads with this garbage. this whole website is a joke. God was all about love, your message is all about how to spot people that arent worthy of your attention. god got his hands dirty and talked to everyone. what makes you so good that you cant. you didnt die on a cross, you made a website where you can saftly talk shit about everyone.
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13 
1
1:28 pm
wait.. is this serious? I thought it was a parody! please tell me it’s a parody.. please? it seems like it can’t be real, but then I’ve had gay pets.. many. My aunts bred a lot of animals when i was a kid/teen- rabbits especially (and dogs) seemed the most likely to be gay- and i don’t mean bisexual.. i mean out and out gay.. male rabbits refusing to mate with any female he was paired with but going at any other male rabbit. One scientist was doing research on gay rams (studying their brains postmortem) If this is a parody then it’s a bad one- in that you should be able to tell a parody from actual propaganda. There’s a certain point at which a parody becomes so good that it’s indistinguishable from content the writer actually believes in which case it’s no longer helping their cause.
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7:07 pm
if I had a gay wolf, I’d take it to church and make the fucker eat the priest
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5
11:53 pm
You have got to be fucking kidding me.
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4:30 pm
Your article is an insult to my intelligence! Despite what you want to think. The world is not flat and the universe does not rotate around you and your interpretation of the Bible. The world is a planet that rotates around a sun that rotates around in the Milky Way galaxy. You really need to take the holyer than thou blinders off. There is a unquestionable amount of of evidence that there are homosexual animals out in the wild.
I know, I am the spawn of hell for saying that humans are animals and we are no better in gods eyes than any of his other wonderful creations.
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12:39 am
Stephenson tends to write really long winded articles. And by long winded I mean completely based in the realm of reality because this man is a man of the world.
A man of his word.
A man of…
The internet.
Believe everything you read, folks. God forbid you think.
tl;dr
Gay Animals
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13 
1
10:53 pm
No. They don’t. Because heaven doesn’t exist. That is at least what I believe. Pets, and all other living things, go to Summerland when they die, and afterwards are reincarnated into any kind of living creature, including humans. There is nothing wrong with homosexuality. Homosexual people are born that way, so it is completely natural. Besides, not all people can be categorized into a neat little box, pinning them “straight” or “gay”. Even bisexuality has many shades.
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10:46 am
I love you, Stephenson Billings. You are vastly entertaining. I am amazed at your stunning ability to undermine the same values you (seem to) believe so strongly in.
Teach me.
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4
9:41 am
LOLOLOLOLOL
another funny article. are you some sort of comedian?
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2
9:04 am
Cool Story, Bro.
Get a brain, get a life, and start thinking for yourself. Groupthink isn’t cool.
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3
9:20 pm
You know that part about an alien observing the homo-eroticism of those football players was actually quite intriguing.
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6 
2
6:06 am
Aw bless, christians… I used to have an imaginary friend too.
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1
7:11 am
If there’s an afterlife I can say with utter confidence that in the good place some of those kind sentient being are gay or animals, I’d bet my life on it
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9:01 pm
Wow, I’ve been a born and raised Christian for a while now, but seriously? Paranoia to go as far as to say gay people are evil and cats are too? The bible says God and Jesus hate hypocrites more then those who are homosexual. Before you cast the first stone at anyone, take a look at yourself. At some point you’ve been a hypocrite, it’s nearly impossible to avoid, so in this manner of thinking, God hates all of us right now a lot more then gays. Cats are evil … so is anyone who doesn’t serve the lord, take someone who’s never heard of him evil? Especially because they don’t serve you? This is the same thinking that led white to believe their superiority over blacks, which is wholly ironic because Jesus was of quite dark skin himself, living in Israel and Hebrew, out in the hot sun. Which we should really get the skin tone right so as not to offend the lord, seriously, he wasn’t white. FYI not everyone in the world who doesn’t grovel at the lords feet or at yours is evil. And just because someone says their Christian doesn’t mean they’re a good person. Need I remind anyone of the millions of dollars Oral Robertson stole? It’s no wonder religious people get a bad name, some take advantage of their love in the lord and translate it to love of money and that god wants everyone rich, which isn’t technically possible based on how money works, because we need poor to create rich. That is a sin to deprive others of basic needs while we enjoy our lives and they starve on the streets. Those are the issues we should focus on, but no, instead we claim cats are evil and gays want to violate and desanctify everyone.
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7:47 pm
I would love to see you face Reverend Falwell or Reverend Robertson with this type of arrogant, liberal lefty attitude. You wouldn’t last a minute. Don’t you understand where the Christian Patriotic movement in this country is heading? Are you saying all those people are wrong and somehow you are right? Homosexuality is an incredible danger today, just ask all the people at Focus on the Family, American Family Council, National Organization for Marriage, Americans for Truth About Homosexuality, etc., etc. Are you calling all of us together liars? For shame…
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2 
7
11:34 am
I forgot there were no pro gay orginizations or you know…parades or something.
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7 
1
5:18 am
Mmm, Aluysion saying ‘Before you cast the first stone at anyone, take a look at yourself’, and suggesting Christians should focus on tolerance and helping the needy rather than preaching hate and division is clearly an ungodly ‘arrogant lefty liberal attitude’. Oh wait, that makes Jesus an arrogant lefty liberal too… What a shame he’s not around now, or you ‘Christian Patriots’ could be the first to kick him out. Perhaps God could send a plague of gay locusts after him?
There is nothing ‘Christian’ or indeed ‘patriotic’ about preaching hate, division, and victimising a minority group. Excellent logic:
‘are you saying all the people in organizations that hate gays are wrong that homosexuality is an incredible danger and you are right? Are you calling all of us together liars? For shame’.
(Replace ‘gays’ with ‘Jews’ and we’ve been transported to Nazi Germany!) Are you calling EVERYONE ELSE who believes in tolerance and turning the other cheek, and all organisations that support equal treatment regardless of race, gender or sexual orientation together liars? Well then…. for shame! The most ‘incredible danger’ to society is people who, like you, bully, dehumanise and hate. You have corrupted the Christian message, for which it is you that should be entirely ashamed – just to enlighten you, it was about love, tolerance and charity. (And, er, not hating cats)
Kindly don’t object to ‘being called liars’ and then call people ‘arrogant’ and ‘dishonest’ yourself for having different opinions to your own. It’s embarrassingly hypocritical for you.
Oh, and briefly on topic: homosexuality in the animal kingdom (in natural habitats) is incredibly well documented. This article is deliberately misleading.
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8 
2
5:32 am
Becca, I agree that the people who disagree with allowing Christians freedom of expression are indeed practicing hate. There is a concerted effort by liberals and atheists to suppress the religious freedom of Christians in this country today (and across the world). Just try preaching Leviticus in the inner city.
Your insincere attempt to label Christian texts as “hate” and “division” are strangely out of touch with the times. I refer you again to what every other leader in Christianity is saying today and I would you love it if you found a single quote where they specifically refute my beliefs on homosexuality and pets. I would even accept a Jesse Jackson quote.
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10:04 am
“Becca, I agree that the people who disagree with allowing Christians freedom of expression are indeed practicing hate.”
And yet, you’re not practicing hate by disagreeing with allowing homosexuals freedom of expression?
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7:13 pm
No one is disallowing Christian freedom of expression. Your problem is that you demand people listen (and believe) your expression.
I have just as much freedom to express my opinion that organized religion is the root of all evil as you do to claim that cats are evil.
Don’t stomp on my rights and I won’t stomp on yours. Mind your own business and I’ll mind mine. Live and let live.
Wouldn’t the world be a much better place if you could stop spewing the hate from your soul?
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11:48 pm
This is sick. How do you people believe this crap. Some old dude 2000 years ago writing some words in a book! To express hate so easily to good people you have never met. If God is as allmighty as you say he is, if he had half a brain he would be pointing his finger at all of you laughing. Laughing at how utterly stuped it is to believe in something that has no bases exept for some old book.
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8 
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4:02 pm
This article is so inaccurate.
“there is no widely accepted documented proof that homosexuality exists naturally in the animal kingdom.”
In fact, there have been several documented instances of homosexual species other than humans. Get your facts straight before you waste time typing this bullshit.
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7:44 pm
I addressed this issue specifically in the article but somehow you failed to read that part. Why don’t you try again? It’s the part that reads:
“…a handful of homosexual situations have been observed in the animal kingdom, but only in zoos. This is caused by the same “cabin fever” mentality that you find in prisons and is representative of the type of faithless liberal thinking that poses a genuine danger to American democracy.
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5:45 pm
Once agian, you fail. If you researched the topic you would realize that there have been many published studies on this subject in which homosexual behaviors were reported observed in close to 1,500 species, some on which in their natural habitat.
“Bagemihl’s research shows that homosexual behavior, not necessarily sex, has been observed in close to 1500 species, ranging from primates to gut worms, and is well documented for 500 of them.”
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2
5:22 am
Stop being so obnoxious. I have answered your question and proven you wrong so just accept the facts and move on. I have no interest in reading your childish essays just because you’re not mature enough to accept that animals do not have a place in the Kingdom of Heaven. Face facts my friend.
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5:55 am
it really takes balls to have proof shoved in your face and still say “i proved you wrong” billings. it also takes tremendous amounts of stupidity.
you have provided no proof what so ever. on the contrary we have provided proof that you are inarguably wrong. you say animals can’t have homosexual tendencies. we have proof of over 1500 spieces haveing it. you can’t argue against that number you simply can’t… as for if they go to heaven… you are right but then very fewof us go to fantasy land anyway. and that’s not the argument anyway.
you have proven nothing but how arogant you are. you have provided no facts but when you do i’ll be more than willing to listen.
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6:03 am
Do you know friend that Jesus loves You! Welcoming him into heart is the key to your redemption and your salvation. Please keep all that in mind and be good to yourself. I know you are a good person deep inside despite everything.
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6:07 am
i am a good person yes i’m perfectly aware of that. jesus can love me how ever much he like i’m still not gonna change my openion and i still think you are an idiot. btw great way to show you know you are wrong by simply changeing the subject. top notch bet nobody noticed you did that dumbass.
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2
7:15 pm
“I have answered your question and proven you”
Really? Because it sure looks like he proved you wrong.
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6:46 pm
This doesn’t even merit a detailed reply. These people are either nuts or playing a really funny joke.
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11:07 am
Having an article named exactly the same as an episode of south park? LOL! just shows how serious this can be taken. It does comfort me to know now that this is just liberal satire! i really thought you were genuine degenerates for a while! Its so obvious now i see it! no way people would be just as stupid as you pretend to be! Lol how stupid i must have been to think anybody genuinelly thought like this!
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7:42 pm
There is no tv episode entitled, “Do Gay Pets Go To Heaven.” That is an out and out lie and for you to accuse me of plagiarism is pathetic and frankly immature. If you had bothered to read my article, it was written as a response to writer Jon Mooallem’s appearance on Stephen Colbert’s show where he tried to promote this gay animal agenda. Please try and do some basic comprehension before you lie and spread slander. Your dishonesty and professionalism is not even worth my time. Good night.
Can Animals Be Gay? by Jon Mooallem
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/04/magazine/04animals-t.html
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7:34 pm
You’re right, that’s true. They do, however, have an episode called, “Do Handicapped People Go Heaven?” Sounds like a subject for this site – like they say in the episode, “How can handicapped people go to Heaven if they can’t ask Jesus to Save them” and…yeah. I’d imagine zealots like this would say, “That’s true, they can’t get in, then.” BOLLOCKS.
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7:41 am
This article has more gay overtones to it than an episode of He-Man.
“If this alien watched them jostle in the mud together and then run off to a steamy shower where they playfully gave each other slaps and shared a single bar of minty soap, what would this alien think? What if he saw them jump into their pickup trucks and drive home to a frat house where these able-bodied athletes bunked in close quarters, drinking beers together in their underwear on an old couch late into a warm, Southern night?”
Is that a scene from your next homoerotic novel? Because it sounds awesome.
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3:04 pm
Soooo….. I should eat my cat?
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11:29 am
This is an article? Pardon me, but what “many studies have shown” that homosexuality is evil? And 1000s of years of human history has not proven homosexuality wrong. It happens all over the world? Certain cultures make it mandatory? Now, citing these examples doesn’t prove it is right or natural to engage in homosexual activity. It takes more then just saying things for something to be true. You need EVIDENCE. And more than one piece.
I may be lying to you about my evidence. The author might be as well. Ask yourself what evidence was provided. None? She linked no scientific articles and ignored counter evidence. She might be right (i disagree) but there is no logical connection from what he/she said to the veracity of his/her beliefs.
Also, research what other things are banned according to the bible and see if you can live with all of those bans. Do you really believe there are light-abominations? If you follow all of god’s commandments then kudos. But if you cherry pick, then you are both a scientific and a religious failure.
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2:13 am
“many will agree it’s a wonderful thing to have your very own youngsters thinking about death and the afterlife.” I lol’d
the rest was just downright bullshit and offensive. I can’t believe people still think this way. if I could just take a moment and be offensive myself, if god really does just go around damning gay people to hell, HE’S A BASTARD.
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4:56 am
“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” —Corinthians 13:7-8.
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7:18 pm
““Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” —Corinthians 13:7-8.”
Yet here you are spewing hate. Not very Christian of you, is it?
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8:24 pm
Homosexuality is a sin in the eyes of our Lord. This is stated so often and so clearly in Christian texts that you should distrust the motivations of anyone who says otherwise
This excerpt from your article got me to thinking. Can you reference me to the verses in the BIBLE, the only true Christian text that is taken as fact, where it states that Homosexuality is evil?
Because, having researched this myself, there is one 1. And it is non a canonical verse, it is from the letters, the part of the bible that is not taken as fact, but rather as an opinion of a good Christian.
I just feel that I have to clarify your blatant lies, and informally complain about your faith. You call yourself a Christian, yet most of your articles are simply a way for you to vent your small-minded hate towards other groups.
Christianity teaches acceptance, and understanding. It also teaches the “turn-the-other-cheek” philosophy.
Yet clearly, you do not follow these teachings, and instead use religion as a weapon to deal out your hatred towards groups that you dislike. Much like religion has been used for centuries to do. I awaint your response, yet I expect it to be nothing more than hate-filled drivel, or else a vague message about how you love everything, so this is why you feel you have to vent your hatred online. I want valid reasons for why you are such an evil person, claiming to be doing the work of God, and using that claim to spread your narrow-mindedness, zealous, and unlearned opinion as a message of hate for others.
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5:02 am
Hi, if you are being earnest and are simply young the most obvious verse in the Bible is:
“If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with a woman, both of them have committed a detestable act; they shall surely be put to death. Their bloodguiltness is upon them” –Levitivus 20:13.
This and many other verses are easily found on the internet or through your pastor. If, instead, you are tying to engage me in some sort of mental trickery, I have no interest. Facetious games are pointless, are you just trying to harass me to justify your own actions? People of faith have long agreed on the sin of homosexuality, despite what all the revisionists have tried to say. I am sorry but in the end your question only shows a lack of respect and immaturity. Please seek the guidance of your adults if you truly have trouble with your sexual identity. I do pray for everyone, even people like you.
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1:02 am
Other funny verses from Leviticus:
Lev. 25:44 “‘Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buy slaves.”
Lev. 15:19 ” ‘When a woman has her regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening.”
Lev. 19:27 “‘Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard.”
Lev. 11:6-8 “7 And the pig, though it has a split hoof completely divided, does not chew the cud; it is unclean for you. You must not eat their meat or touch their carcasses; they are unclean for you.
It’s all about interpretation.
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11:40 am
Finally!!!! owning a cat is a sin… THANK GOD see you later Flurry…
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4:31 am
I love it when the word ‘liberal’ is used in a negative way. It just shows how ignorant the author is.
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12:05 pm
I lost 10 IQ points just by clicking on the “christwire” URL, then another 15 by the time I got done reading the article. The reason I dislike christians and christianity is that you morons have sacrificed your ability to reason. When you base reasoning ability on mythology the result is a society with immoral laws. I find christian logic to be nothing less than immoral. Please sterilize yourselves or become highway statistics. Thank you.
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3:42 am
You’ve got to be kidding. Mr. Billings your writings permeate lust and sexual repression. But aside that I find it really funny that you are making money from a google ad for gay dating.
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4:00 am
I am not responsible for the ads running on my journalism. And I dont see any gay ads, must be something with your computer and your web surfing history?
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7:19 pm
Ads are based on topics posted, so if you post a lot of articles with the word “gay” you’ll get gay ads – PRO gay, btw. Ironic.
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10:49 am
You have contextual ads on your site that serve ads based on the content of your page so the fact you’re making ad revenue for ads promoting homosexuality on a homophobic blog post is hilariously ironic.
You’re thinking of re-targeted ads that display ads to users based on their cookies. So, even more hilarious is that users to your blog post will likely be served pro-gay advertising elsewhere because your site talks about homosexuality.
Thanks for supporting gay-rights through advertising!
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2:04 am
My cat is an adorable little fluffball of sin and I love her so much. Come here, my little fluffykins! Who’s an abomination in the eyes of the Lord for some poorly explained, moronic reason? You are! You are!
I’d write more but I am cuddling my cat.
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10:31 am
To answer this question. No. After all, heaven can’t exist. It’s a theoretical plane that was created by our ancestors, in a time where magic mushrooms were very popular.
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7:15 pm
I wanted to point out something completely different – you say, “[Stephen Colbert] is just a phony who is phoning it in…” Um. Yes. It’s a fake news show, making fun of Bill O’ Riley, just as the Daily Show makes fun of liberal news programs. Of course it’s extreme and ridiculus – it’s done for comedy, not to be taken seriously on any level.
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3:44 am
After reading all the comments back and forth, I can’t believe how hateful you are Billings. It truly makes me sick.
Its sad that you are wasting your entire life on something that “could-be”.
You are so busy telling people what they are “doing wrong”, I bet you don’t have time to enjoy the little things in life.
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9:26 pm
I hate this site sooo much. You post crap with out facts or real proff of anything when you die and theres nothing, that will be all the revenge i need. THERE IS NO GOD, GODS, of any kind!!!
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3:56 pm
I would bet dollars to dimes that the author is a closeted homosexual.
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4:04 pm
Sorry but I am 100% heterosexual.
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4:08 pm
That’s an insult to homosexuals.
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2:02 pm
Hahahaha…America is truly falling apart. What a complete waste of everyones’ time but what a great way to waste mine over a coffee.
Some truly magnificent minds came out of the US. Billings…you are not one. What next? Do tight trousers get you burnt in hell? Can I eat phallic vegetables and still get through those pearly gates?
Buffoon.
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4:16 pm
Look, I’m not a hateful person or anything—I believe we should all live and let live. But lately, I’ve been having a real problem with these homosexuals. You see, just about wherever I go these days, one of them approaches me and starts sucking my cock.
Take last Sunday, for instance, when I casually struck up a conversation with this guy in the health-club locker room. Nothing fruity, just a couple of fellas talking about their workout routines while enjoying a nice hot shower. The guy looked like a real man’s man, too—big biceps, meaty thighs, thick neck. He didn’t seem the least bit gay. At least not until he started sucking my cock, that is.
Where does this queer get the nerve to suck my cock? Did I look gay to him? Was I wearing a pink feather boa without realizing it? I don’t recall the phrase, “Suck my cock” entering the conversation, and I don’t have a sign around my neck that reads, “Please, You Homosexuals, Suck My Cock.”
I’ve got nothing against homosexuals. Let them be free to do their gay thing in peace, I say. But when they start sucking my cock, I’ve got a real problem.
Then there was the time I was hiking through the woods and came across a rugged-looking, blond-haired man in his early 30s. He seemed straight enough to me while we were bathing in that mountain stream, but, before you know it, he’s sucking my cock!
What is it with these homos? Can’t they control their sexual urges? Aren’t there enough gay cocks out there for them to suck on without them having to target normal people like me?
Believe me, I have no interest in getting my cock sucked by some queer. But try telling that to the guy at the beach club. Or the one at the video store. Or the one who catered my wedding. Or any of the countless other homos who’ve come on to me recently. All of them sucked my cock, and there was nothing I could do to stop them.
I tell you, when a homosexual is sucking your cock, a lot of strange thoughts go through your head: How the hell did this happen? Where did this fairy ever get the idea that I was gay? And where did he get those fantastic boots?
It screws with your head at other times, too. Every time a man passes me on the street, I’m afraid he’s going to grab me and drag me off to some bathroom to suck my cock. I’ve even started to visualize these repulsive cock-sucking episodes during the healthy, heterosexual marital relations I enjoy with my wife—even some that haven’t actually happened, like the sweaty, post-game locker-room tryst with Vancouver Canucks forward Mark Messier that I can’t seem to stop thinking about.
Things could be worse, I suppose. It could be women trying to suck my cock, which would be adultery and would make me feel tremendously guilty. As it is, I’m just angry and sickened. But, believe me, that’s enough. I don’t know what makes these homosexuals mistake me for a guy who wants his cock sucked, and, frankly, I don’t want to know. I just wish there were some way to get them to stop.
I’ve tried all sorts of things, but it’s all been to no avail. A few months back, I started wearing an intimidating-looking black leather thong with menacing metal studs in the hopes that it would frighten those faggots off, but it didn’t work. In fact, it only seemed to encourage them. Then, I really started getting rough, slapping them around whenever they were sucking my cock, but that failed, too. Even pulling out of their mouths just before ejaculation and shooting sperm all over their face, chest, and hair seemed to have no effect. What do I have to do to get the message across to these swishes?
I swear, if these homosexuals don’t take a hint and quit sucking my cock all the time, I’m going to have to resort to drastic measures—like maybe pinning them down to the cement floor of the loading dock with my powerful forearms and working my cock all the way up their butt so they understand loud and clear just how much I disapprove of their unwelcome advances. I mean, you can’t get much more direct than that.
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9:25 pm
Yes, I know what the Onion is. Your cut & paste satire not only fails as comedy, but it violates copyright laws. You should think twice before repeating such childishness.
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7:26 pm
It was the better than anything you’ve written on this site.
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8:24 pm
I LOVE THIS SITE! This is truly the funniest nonsense I have ever read!
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9:59 pm
oh, and p.s.
HEAVEN DOES NOT EXIST, YOU MORON.
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8:40 am
For you to write the above “Do gay pets go to heaven” and many other wonderful topics like “Why Rabbits Rape Cats”, you must have a screw loose. I hope a restraining order has been issued to you- to stay away from kids.
Thoughts like those tend to indicate that you are most likely to be a paedophile.
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9:43 am
I have a serious concern about my wife and my future place in heaven that I wanted to ask in this safe forum. My wife and I have been happily married for the last 14 years (praise the lord) and have a beautiful son and daughter. We kept our sexual relationship very simple and left the erotic (“sinful) nature of human sexuality out of the bedroom so that it would not offend the lord. However, recently my wife has become interested in “animal play” – the idea that we should wear costumes in the evening as we make love, those of the “furry beasts” you speak of. I consulted my minister as to whether this was an abomination in the eyes of god, and he, after much introspection, said that as long as my wife and I were portraying the same species of animal, such behavior would not be too bad of a sin.
My wife and I portray deers as we make love (she’s brought in a small potted fern to represent the forest), but only a week ago I realized my wife’s costume has ANTLERS! That’s right, my harmless religious experiment now may have doomed my family because I only realized too late that we were portraying GAY DEER!
Then an even more horrifying event happened later that week, when my wife told me that she is PREGNANT! Without getting into to many details about our lovemaking schedule, I will just say there is a good chance that the conception occurred on one of our “deer nights.”
I am terrified over the future of my family’s souls. I have this horrible conviction that my wife is going to give birth to a human with the mindset of a gay deer, or worse, some kind of half deer half human hybrid. I’m appealing to anyone on the forum to offer me whatever advice they can find within themselves – are there any incantations I can perform over my pregnant wife to turn the unborn child’s soul back towards the lord? Is there perhaps another animal I could dress as while my wife and I make love that would counteract the deer? What animal is the opposite of a deer? An eel? A jellyfish?
Needless to say I have sawed the antlers off my wife’s deer costume and for now we’ve returned to making love as two normal heterosexual deer, but I fear the damage is done and I may be too late. I’d be eternally grateful for any advice or support I receive.
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7:30 pm
Is this a joke? Are you serious? I mean, really? Just because a “human” once wrote the he had dominion over animals, does not mean it is so. God di NOT write the bible. It was written by humans. Even if you believe that God guilded their hand, who had the final say? Humans. Animals live a life without greed, judgement, selfishness, egos. Perhaps they are what God intended. If humans were meant to “eat” animals, why is their flesh so hard to digest?
BTW, you have some very disgusting, perverted ideas, I really suggest you get some help. Do you really sit around and think about this stuff? Dude, that’s not right!! Really, get some therapy. You have some serious issues with sex.
If we are put here to “go forth and multiply” does that mean I’m going to hell for not having children? Anyone can get pregnant. The real trick is NOT getting pregnant!!
I used to have 2 FEMALE cats, both spayed (for you, the uneducated, that means they no longer have sexual desire) who would hump each other all day long. They had a male companion, neutered, but they preferred each other. So, yes, there are gay animals.
Finally, exactly who in the hell do you think you are?? You are not the one who decides who or what gets into heaven. That is up to God and God alone. I don’t care what the “human” written word says, or how YOU interperate it. YOU do not decide!!
Again, you really need some help for the seriously perverted way that you think.
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9:30 pm
The Holy Spirit wrote the Bible, that is why we called it the “Holy Bible” since its source is divine. Yes, various men did put their quills to paper but they were recording what God said to them. Indeed, in Hebrews we read:
“God, who at many times and in many ways spoke in the past to the fathers through the prophets, has in these last days spoken to us through (the) son, whom he has appointed heir of all things, through whom also he made the worlds, who being the reflection of the glory and the exact image of his substance, and upholding all things by the power of his word, when he had effected a cleansing of sins, sat down at the right hand of the majesty on high.” –Hebrews 1:1-3.
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9:04 pm
I’m afraid your narrow mind has missed my point. The point I was trying to make is that “man” had the final say in the editing process. What would happen today if these so called prophets stated that God “spoke” to them? They would be locked up in an instisution! For all we know, these guys were a bunch of mentally challanged people who heard voices. The FACT is, YOU don’t know. You don’t decide who gets into heaven and and who doesn’t. By doing so, you are trying to give your self the power of God. That is a sin. Being self-righteous is a sin. If you want to be a “true man of God” you really need to humble yourself and learn to love as Jesus did. Jesus did not not scoff at other peoples way of life.
If there are none of Gods beautiful creatures in heaven, I’m don’t think I would want to go there! They are the only beings on earth capable of unconditional love. I have not been “enslaved” by my cats, I am a mother to them. Just like any child, I take care of there needs. They light up my life in more ways than I could count. I pity you for not allowing yourself to feel that kind of affection.
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10:31 pm
Here’s some science for yas:
Count how many times the word “gay” is used in this article, and then multiply that number by 5.
That’s how many times the author of this article has had to repress a gay fantasy in the last 24 hours.
Then count the times the word “homosexual” is used and multiply that number by 2.
That’s how many times the author has had gay sex in their life.
Now go to the home page of this website and count how many times the words “gay” and “homosexual” appear anywhere on the home page and add that number together. (btw: you can shortcut the count by using the “find” function on your browser)
Then multiple that number by 1.
And finally, that’s how many members of this organization and the administration of this website are closeted gay people.
It’s simple math and so very obvious.
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12:24 am
It’s common knowledge that Locusts are just Grasshoppers turned homo.
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1:49 am
If using Jesus as a means to put everyone and everything down in life makes you feel like you’re being a good Christian, then I truly feel sorry for you. You have offended hundreds if not thousands of people by the messages of hate that you deliver. Cats are sinful. Women acting on their own accord is sinful. Homosexuality is sinful. Even treating your pets with love and care is sinful. I haven’t heard you speak of what isn’t sinful. What are some good things in life for you? What are some things you love? Do you have a wife that you love? If you truly loved with all of your heart, you would enjoy the Earth and the people around you and their differences. If all you’re doing is waiting for your afterlife by hating people for things that a book says, then I truly deeply feel sorry for you.
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9:32 pm
Emmy, I will humbly repeat the response I have given many times to the liberals of our faith: I am simply working in the long tradition of our other great Christian leaders today. I am dedicated to my faith and only want to help save souls. Sometimes you have to be frank with people and those who know me appreciate my forthrightness with it comes to Truth.
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9:43 pm
//Emmy, I will humbly repeat the response I have given many times to the liberals of our faith: I am simply working in the long tradition of our other great Christian leaders today. I am dedicated to my faith and only want to help save souls. Sometimes you have to be frank with people and those who know me appreciate my forthrightness with it comes to Truth.//
And you assume that liberals aren’t Christians why?
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5:13 am
Final line of the article
“You nasty people truly deserve each other.”
wow, I feel the Christian love, what a loving man.
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7:54 am
The point of your inane article is…that no animals, gay or straight, go to Heaven. Thanks for clearing that up, Steve-o. Great job!
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8:38 am
Well. It was almost too early in the morning when I read this. I vacillated between rage and the comfort of knowing that Mr. Billings is a man who is clearly fantasizing about underage boys while alternately spewing vitriol to cover “the musk of his indecency.”
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8:59 am
Are you people for fucking real???????
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10:44 am
Oh you people and your myths. How cute. Take out references to Christianity in this article and I’d have a hard time determining if this was a Harry Potter blog or not given the basis of your judgements on other human beings being based on a book that talks about people getting turned into blocks of salt and sentient snakes making people eat apples.
I’m cool with the idea there’s an afterlife but to make people feel shame because you believe in a work of fiction makes me certain half of our society is stuck in the year 1500.
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4:44 pm
Ok, this guy’s rants are now totally viral; I’ve got friends from every walk of life posting on Facebook and laughing at him — gay, straight, old, young. At this point I’m starting to think Stephenson Billings is just shining you people on for the sake of publicity. I think the moment he went truly overboard was when he started calling cats sinful. Can this possibly be serious??? I’m having serious doubts. I think Stephenson Billings is actually Stephen Colbert or something. I know some fairly hard-core Christians — I went to a very observant Christian high school — and Mr. Billings is beyond-the-beyond. I officially call BS on S.B.
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9:34 pm
If I can save just one soul, I will be content. If you believe in something truly wondrous and beautiful, why not try to promote it with all your might?
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9:42 pm
You do realize that according to Leviticus, you’re technically sending these people to Hell, right? You have to have perfect eye-sight, not touch pig-skin (i.e. Football), can’t wear multiple fabrics at once (something everyone is bound to have done), and he advocates slavery, as well as rape with little consequence. Not only that, you’ve failed to live up to the standards of going to Heaven by not having a family and producing children. Yet you claim we need the Old Testament as well as the New in order to get the whole Bible.
Ain’t it funny how actual Christians had the common sense to NOT follow the Old Testament and follow the New Testament instead? But according to you, these people aren’t Christians.
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7:30 pm
You’ve made a good point.. How could Stephenson have been a football player when he couldn’t touch pigskin?
Maybe he was on the cheer squad. Or maybe water/towel/jockstrap boy.
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6:05 pm
Do you think you’ll get bored of God after awhile? Heaven is meant to be where we sit at the feet of our Lord and revel in his light and glory for eternity.
WHAT THE- I DON’T WANT PEOPLE NEAR MY FEET
AND I LOVE ANIMALS, BY THE WAY…AND JERSEY SHORE.
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4:37 am
I can’t believe so many people thinkt his website is serious and post these passionate messages. lol. Idiots who can’t get a parody.
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5:14 pm
Is this a real website? Because this is just hilarious.
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7:35 pm
The idea that a single omnipotent intelligence created the universe and everything in it is one thing…the idea that this same intelligence set out making his plans known to us through wandering tribesmen is, yet another..but the idea that some 2000 years after some guy who claimed to be the son of this intelligence has passed, that this small puddle of bacterial effluent might be considered journalism..well this is patently absurd.
You sir, are either mentally ill, or are an ‘agent provocateur’ bent on discrediting the message of Christianity. In either case, you do no service to anyone who is considering the aforementioned precepts.
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10:54 am
33% of the world’s population is Christian.
85% of Americans are Christian.
Clearly, you are the one out of touch with the mainstream.
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2:13 pm
It has been said a stopped clock is correct two times per day.
Clock 2
Stephenson Billings 0
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8:44 am
HAHAHA! Holy shit! Is this stuff serious? HAHA! Because these morons know about as much about heaven and god and any athiest, which is to say NOTHING.
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9:48 pm
HAHAHAHA OMG, BEING OUT THE WHOLE doesnt mean you are right or wrong…PUFF RETARD! You should never change the way you are, in the end people need persons like you to compare themselves and see that they are not pretty fucked up as you are, you give us hope..really…
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7:45 pm
Me again. Billings, if you are trying to embarrass intelligent, well-educated Christians, you are doing a great job!
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8:29 pm
Sir, I just have to ask if you are actually aware of the fact that homosexuality is not caused by being American. I couldn’t even finish your article b/c that is just insulting. The fact of the matter is that homosexuality is all over the world, not just in our country. As you pointed out there were supposedly “thousands of years” of research. The only thing any person is guilty of in America is fighting for the right to be free. And b/c we are still a baby country it’s going to continue being a large fight.
Do unto others as you would have done unto you.
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10:57 am
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10:19 pm
It’s interesting that you can sit there and point out the causes and take the point away from my previous statement. I don’t actually care what the causes are. I simply stated that it’s world wide, not simply nation wide. There are actual problems in the American society that has no bearing on someone’s sexual orientation. Those problems, not the one you stated, are more likely to destroy the country.
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6:23 am
Your website makes its money through Google Adsense ads that are all for gay products! At first I thought it was a serious article but after noticing this I realize you must be joking considering you don’t mind supporting your self by selling third party gay products.
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10:58 am
I’m a journalist, not some techie. I don’t have control over these things. Truth is, I honestly object to the tenor of some ads but I see far more ads for positive Christian messages and conservative polls and news sources than the occasional gay thing.
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9:08 am
remember sir, the Bible WAS NOT written by Jesus or God, It was written by men with their own views and opinions. So what you’re saying is if god created us in his likeness as the bible says, god is gay???????
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12:29 pm
Hi, you might find this information helpful:
Who Wrote the Bible – A Letter from God
http://www.allabouttruth.org/who-wrote-the-bible.htm
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2:06 pm
Wow obviously you got no love from your parents whatsoever and are now trying to make up for that by spreading hatred and ignorance.
So you say you’re Christian which means that you follow the beliefs of Jesus Christ. Now correct me if I’m wrong but Jesus’ teachings were all about love and tolerance; not about condemning people, judging them and preaching hatred. So who the hell are you to judge others? Your statements about homosexuals clearly show that you’ve never even talked to a homosexual person. Otherwise you’d know that they are just as caring and intelligent and funny as any heterosexual person out there.
The last time people were walking around, praising the same crap you do was back during WWII. Now we all know that, should there be heaven and hell, Hitler and his Nazi pals certainly burn in the latter. And so will you. Have a nice day.
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3:34 pm
I have to sit still in Heaven? I thought I’d at least get a harp.
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5:04 pm
So, Mr. Billings, do you eat pork? How about shellfish? How about getting your hair cut?
Do you engage in any of those other hundreds of “abominations” laid out in the bible?
Yes, I suspected as much. You just want to cherry-pick which sins you think are bad, or deflect attention from your own urges by condemming them in others.
Get over your cheap self, Mary. You’re going to this mythical “hell” place along with the rest of us. And Rover, too.
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6:21 pm
WTF? Wow, I’m glad my Christian faith doesn’t waste time on such stupid topics as this. I actually think I just lost about 20 IQ points reading this story. Now I know why Christians are under attack, because of stupid stuff like this. Get focused on what matters, being saved and really, worrying about yourself.
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6:48 am
I can’t believe you people are discussing homosexual pets! Mr. Billings says that it is a hot topic right now. Where and by whom? I haven’t heard anyone I know talking about this. Instead I have heard people talking about the sorry state of healthcare and the economy and how to fix it, how to fight coruption, how to budget for increased food prices and the higher cost of living or how to ensure their children are happy, healthy, well adjusted and contributing citizens. Why are you wasting time thinking and talking about useless ideas that will not help the human race improve itself? God gave us a more developed brain than other animals for problem solving, not for pondering useless issues like “homosexual pets”. Our problem solving brain is what has made us the most successful animal on the planet as it has helped us to increase agriculture, develop heated dwelings and many technological advances which help our lives. Please let us engage in more useful discourse.
My other point has to do with the quality of Mr. Billings article. As a Master of Science I have to say that if I compare your article to that of any major journal or periodical I must say that it is the least logical, least researched and least supported article I have ever read. If you would try to put together more convincing articles by stating coherent ideas in each paragraph followed by well documented facts and statistics to support your ideas you would more successfully convince people that 1) you are knowledgeable on the subject, 2) your main aim is to convince people of your ideas rather than to stir anger and hate, and that 3)all conservative Christians are not ignorant.
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10:12 am
I discussed at length the New York Times cover story, the Colbert Report interview and the author making the rounds discussing this story. And you claim no one is talking about this? Did you even bother to read this article before making such a foolish comment? I guess not.
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10:53 am
Go forth and multiply.
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5:49 pm
You sir are a hateful fucking psycho without a clue.
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8:04 pm
Does nobody get that this is satire?
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2:16 am
” It was terribly offensive for me to watch this greasy liberal propaganda machine turn out a new set of lies. These two charlatans rightly deserve each other with their hatred of reason and faith pooled up in balls of sweat on their pancaked faces.”– this is what is known as an attack on the writers of an article as opposed to his, her, or their actual points.
Do you know what this kind of statement says about the person that makes it?
That he or she is biased against the cited article. And a document that is clearly biased loses quite a bit of credibility in the eyes of the reader.
Try to look for facts as opposed to ways to insult other writers next time you actually would like to make a convincing argument.
Also, I’m a chick and I like chicks. It’s the way I am. I am not attracted to men, but I am to females. I’m sure some animals feel the same way. We aren’t evil or disgusting, we’re just too cool for the opposite sex. 8{D
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10:15 am
“The land is mine and you are but aliens and my tenants. Throughout the country that you hold as a possession, you must provide for the redemption of the land.” –Lev. 25:23-24.
“Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” –Genesis 1:26.
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4:37 am
Am I alone in taking some satisfaction in knowing that Billings will never, ever realize the homoerotic fantasies he so publicly and dearly and covetously nurtures? Old, fat, balding, stupid, evasive, antisocial, untalented, envious, obsessed (with unclean male musk, apparently), did I leave anything out? Like that isn’t enough? Yak.
As much as this site has given me some much needed belly laughs lately I do come away from it feeling a bit dirty and sad… kind of like coming home from an encounter with… hmmm… what’s that phrase…
…oh yeah. A fucking ATTENTION WHORE.
You really are a stupid fuck, Billings. You aren’t qualified to “save” anyone. You can’t fucking write. You can’t address your latent homosexuality. You can’t even deal with cats. If heaven’s so fucking real and so fucking great then please just fucking die and go there already, for fuck’s sake. The notion of a heaven populated by creepy repressed ugly gay fucks like you just pushes agnostics towards atheism.
I have discovered, however that your rants are a fantastic source of band names- I mean…
“Plague of Gay Locusts”? I am soooo gonna rock that shit!
But you’re still a stupid, irrelevant (would be) fucker.
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10:16 am
You have a sick mind.
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5:47 pm
FUCK YOU GUYS!!!!! THATS WHATS WRONG WITH CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIANS!!!! ALWAYS DECIDING WHO GETS TO GO TO HEAVEN…WELL ITS NOT YOU ITS GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And btw nice example about the aliens and football players, maybe you should question your sexuality if you do all those things fag
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10:29 pm
So all animals can’t go to heaven, so what’s your point? Why bring up the fact that gay animals don’t go to heaven?
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11:23 am
Damn, is this what passes for news these days? You talk about the sins of the lazy, but you are writing about gay animals going to heaven… seems like someone is wasting their time to me.
Ultimately, closed minded freaks like this under any religion should not be able to reproduce. Luckily for everyone this guy is definitely a gay, pedophile… well not so lucky for the kids, keep them locked up around this guy
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12:14 pm
You are so obviously lashing out against your latent homosexuality. You talk about “group psychology”? Let’s talk about projected emotions through subtext:
“them jostle in the mud together and then run off to a steamy shower where they playfully gave each other slaps and shared a single bar of minty soap, what would this alien think? What if he saw them jump into their pickup trucks and drive home to a frat house where these able-bodied athletes bunked in close quarters, drinking beers together in their underwear on an old couch late into a warm, Southern night?”
The sheer homo-eroticism in this paragraph is enough to know you’re a deeply sad, angry, closeted homosexual who is too filled with rage and intolerance to accept himself, so you decides to hate everyone else who has the freedom to be what you can never be. I do feel very sorry for you. But I don’t hate you. I love you and I pity you. God does not hate you for who you are, sir, nor does he hate you for how much judgment you possess. Stop throwing stones, you judgmental, angry, sad excuse for a Christian. And please stop giving true, Christ-loving, love-filled, non-judgmental, open-hearted Christians like me a bad name.
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6:27 pm
Actually, no one is paid to watch the Colbert Report, but you can get free tickets to his show.
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10:34 am
Ok, so everyone’s noticed that the author is clearly a homosexual, right? Let’s look at the following paragraph, especially the words in CAPS:
“imagine if an alien were to visit the earth and watch a group of HEARTY football players on the field through his telescope. If this alien watched them JOSTLE in the mud together and then run off to a STEAMY shower where they PLAYFULLY gave each other slaps and shared a single bar of MINTY soap, what would this alien think? What if he saw them jump into their pickup trucks and drive home to a frat house where these ABLE-BODIED athletes bunked in close quarters, drinking beers together in their UNDERWEAR on an old couch late into a warm, Southern night?”
Ha! This guy is either a genius and this is all a joke, or this is the most repressed gay person ever.
Or maybe not. Maybe the best way to illustrate your point really is to imagine a hypothetical scene about using a telescope to spy on……….HEARTY football players JOSTLING about in the mud and sharing a STEAMY shower on a……..warm, Southern night.
This stuff is great. Keep it coming.
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11:05 am
“If this alien watched them jostle in the mud together and then run off to a steamy shower where they playfully gave each other slaps and shared a single bar of minty soap, what would this alien think? What if he saw them jump into their pickup trucks and drive home to a frat house where these able-bodied athletes bunked in close quarters, drinking beers together in their underwear on an old couch late into a warm, Southern night?”
Whew! Stephenson! You’ve outdone yourself. I’m guessing there was some singlehanded typing going on. Sounds like the storyline of a vintage William Higgins film. Or is the the true story of your own homosexual awakening? Tell us, did the rest of the team pass you around like the dirty boy you were?
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1:47 am
this shit is fucking hilarious! mr. billings you are either psychotic, or a genius. either way, you’re hysterical. keep up the utter nonsense!
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1:07 pm
I own ducks, and love them in a very pet way, I find it disturbing to think that people would get upset over something that was their fault to begin with. I have one duck that is not gay or if he is he does not want the partner that he has. I watch everyday as as he is relentlessly chased and copulated by another male duck.
Who is to say that the one being copulated is doing it freely or being bullied into it.
The question is more so I believe is what will happen to us, knowing full well Nationally governed experiments; in a hope to quell the Vietcong during the 1960s by using Agent Orange (deceptively simple name) a batch of chemicals mixed with some DDT to change the hormonal balance in men in the quest to halt reproductive activity. Is the real answer as to why so many ducks display this behavior. Once the ground water was infected what chance did other animals have? More so what chance did man have? Was any thought as to what the cause and effect might be to our own soldiers? Has anyone ever wondered why the government took so long to add “Agent-Orange” to the medical condition covered by the VET? And even longer to add it to the list of other countries; the DMZ of South Korea, the airports that it was handled in on its journey to the war zones?
The long lasting effect that affects people in this country, we currently buy fish grown in Vietnam and feed it to our own people. Then we have the nerve to question someones, or somethings sexual preference.
There is a lot more here then just why is my male duck being screwed by another male duck. When the males should be acting more normal by gang raping the few female ducks I have, and going after the adolescent females. Another side effect of the government experiments, the 5 to 1 ratio of male to female ducks. In the end a rush to judgment by those who have not researched the whole picture. And rely only on what they hear. Remember it is easy to start something but it can take quite a while to unravel the knots that have been in place so long, and tightened by those who never took the time to see the whole picture. Sometimes it is better to just move ahead rather than persecute gods creatures. For God knows who is to blame and no amount of lying will save you from Gods wrath.
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4:58 am
I really don’t understand how you can call yourself Christian and someone who upholds Christian values. What you are is a sick, frightened little man who has absolutely no respect for the choices of individuals- choosing to be gay or straight has no effect on the individual goodness of a person and if you respected life on earth as GOD made it you would realize this. It’s people like you who make me ashamed to be a Christian. You are no better than any other extremist on this planet today. I hope God judges you accordingly.
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1:33 pm
This site proves that liberals are as dumb, if not dumber, than the fundamentalist right. Are you people serious? You actually think this website is serious? It’s clearly a parody of the Christian right, and the New York Times did an article on it. But it should be so obvious that this isn’t serious.
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2:21 pm
Wow. Wow. Wow. This article consists of the insane rantings no better than that of a HATE GROUP.
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3:16 pm
Lol highly uninformed article. No proof that there are homosexual animals? There’s pretty disputable, clear and evident proof that wild, exclusively homosexual rams exist and are in fact not uncommon. The fact that this article doesn’t even try to dispute the evidence of gay animals, and speaks as if it’s all been imagined and no one has actually caught them having sex in the wild (of which their is of course loads of evidence), is embarrassing.
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9:16 pm
If god controls everything and is almighty, then wouldn’t he be the cause of everything that happened. Including being gay?
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8:34 pm
The author is a moron! This is laughable…it’s being circulated around the web as an example of iodiocy. It’s sad that many stupid people who can’t think for themselves believe this moronic crap.
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4:07 am
IF “God” made these animals, why would he not completely love them in every way? Are you saying that animals, who Christians choose to eat because God put them on this earth for them to eat, are able to make the conscious decision to be gay? Doesn’t that fact in its self go against everything that “Christians” are suppose to believe. God does not make mistakes and would never want you to hate anyone. So what are you filled with so much hate?
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3:03 pm
wow this is pathetic. Great of a “Christian” to spew around so much fucking hate. You sure are a stupid peice of shit with nothing on your mind but hate. Does this even matter to anyone? I’m no christian but I feel bad for the bad name you’re giving everyone who is. I think you need to just shut the fuck up.
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11:09 am
Is this real?
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2:56 pm
Thanks for linking to my blog. Lots of people have discovered my SUPER GAY blog because of it. Yay!!!!
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1:29 pm
greasy? that is the best adjective you could think of to describe the evil liberal machine? greasy? GREASY? but really, greasy?
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3:57 pm
Please visit & help : loveanimalsromania.webs
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1:36 pm
Hi
well im surprised…i have never …never read an article that is so RETARD, STUPID, IGNORANT, FAKE and GAY in my life.
Your are dangerous to our society, misleading people with false statements hidden behind moral speeches… you are the real sinner here with a lack of common sense, confusing Bible words about love and humanity.
But i have to be honest with you, after i finished reading this crap i LAUGH a lot thinking it will be funny following your articles with a entertainment purpose…After failing the objective to protect human values at least you can be a professional comedian….congratulations!
Keep it up with the excellent work, BITCH
P.D : What kind of church allows this LOSER to preach God words?
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2:24 pm
It seems that you are too immature to appreciate this article.
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9:29 pm
Hi!
I thank God because I am immature to appreciate this article, that means that you really understand its messages…interesting… what do you think about it? I will GLAD to read o_O
But I think it will be RETARD to defend this irrelevant and stupid issue… but thats the sign of you maturity? Come on, lets debate ….
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8:48 pm
I’ve read a lot of badly written, questionably referenced articles, but I have to congratulate the author of this. This is the single worse piece of tripe I’ve ever read. Right down to the reference to “Latins.”
Please do not believe a word written by this wacko.
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8:48 pm
I’ve read a lot of badly written, questionably referenced articles, but I have to congratulate the author of this. This is the single worst piece of tripe I’ve ever read. Right down to the reference to “Latins.”
Please do not believe a word written by this wacko.
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1:39 am
hahahaha!!! do gays pets go to heaven? are these ppl for real? did someone really sit down at a computer and think this article was thought provoking enough to write about? kudos to you, sir. next, I would like you to pen a lengthly story on the dangers of turning gay from eating a burger made from a gay cow.
i’m glad technology is making christianity irrelevant.
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3:24 pm
Gay Pets?
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9:23 pm
This was really fucking stupid. Seriously?
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3:48 pm
I love that, when reading this, there’s an add for a gay couples retreat
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1:55 am
I think the most entertaining part of this whole article is the fact that you’re taking Stephen Colbert seriously. He’s not a news anchor. He’s a comedian. That’s why he’s on Comedy Central.
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1:53 am
Nowhere in the Bible does it specifically say that animals won’t be in heaven. To be quite honest, heaven is described as a perfect paradise, and my perfect paradise will have animals in it, thanks. Even if what you’re saying is true, it’s not our right yours, or mine, to say what’s in the afterlife. Because we don’t know. Unless of course you’ve been in heaven before?
Also, for someone who claims to be a Christian, I am appalled at your last paragraph of this. No true Christian would publicly state they hate someone in such a gross manner as you just did. I hope you’re proud of yourself. Because I’m not proud of you at all, this time.
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7:50 am
Man oh man… You have such a twisted sense of God and the bible…. God is love!!!! Those are the 3 key words!!!! Youre probably one of those people who still believe a womans place is in the kitchen. Well according to the bible woman arent allowed to get married once they devorced their husbands except if its to the same guy… but how many woman get married to their second maybe third husband every saturday, and no one sais thats an abomination… all i can do is laugh. Im gay and God loves me! and I love my lazy cat!!!! STOP JUDGING DUDE!!! FOR ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE!!!! AND YOU ARENT GOD!
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