• Texas Stadium Implosion Represents God’s Frustration with Dallas Cowboys

    April 11, 2010 2:54 pm 1 comment
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  • The Dallas Cowboy’s used to be the greatest football team on Earth. They were blessed with the fourth-greatest quarterback of all time, Troy Aikman. Aikman’s arm always found a way to make the football catch a divine drift as it landed into the hands of an awaiting receiver. This is because Aikman was favored by God and the Christians down in Texas, who know how to proper judge and punish a criminals if you get my drift.

    They even had a running back named Emmet Smith, a believe his nickname was “Chocolate Lightning”. That young man could run like the wind and Dallas prospered! Super Bowls and they were called America’s team. They said Texas Stadium had a whole in its dome so God could ‘smile down upon his Dallas Cowboys’.

    Then, disaster. They let go their coach Jimmy Johnson go and then the athletes slowly let Satan take over. Many of them did drugs. “Neon Deon” Sanders started getting to flashy and interested in being a ‘jive turkey’ and dancing like a hoodlum on the field. This brought a sour taste to God’s mouth and the prayers of Cowboys fans started to fall on deaf ears.

    No more did they get miracle field goals or their prayers answered for a magnificent Hail Mary. Instead, they started getting beat by lowly teams such as the Browns and Bengals. What shame.

    Now today we see the Cowboys have finally symbolically confessed they are no longer God’s team and they are ashamed. They have caused their Texas Stadium Implosion and only took care of the inevitable. It was only a matter of team until God perhaps snapped his fingers or sneezed on this former place of glory, now the hallowed grounds of Satan. It is better to be put out but what a sad way to go. At least we still have memories.

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    Abe If you don't like what you just read here you can just get out of my country. Now how about that smart-alack. Follow me on twitters. Poke me as your New Friend on Facebook!!

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