ChristWire Helps Create Remove Justin Bieber from Internet Technology
We have teamed up with God to power F.A.T. labs to introduce a new way to remove Justin Bieber from the internet.
As you know, Justin Bieber is a new threat to young boys and girls worldwide. Hollywood producers are using Bieber’s effeminate voice and seemingly innocent looks to peddle off lesbian pride shirts at Hot Topic, help rappers like Ludacris sell albums and even have sexual thoughts and experiences at a young age.
These producers are using this technique to also recruit boys, who think if they cut their hair like Justin Bieber and sing in prepubescent falsetto, they can also get record deals and woo girls to do unnatural things with their bodies. We see they will go as far as to make a child go “viral” and hired to Interscope Records after just one recording, just to make it really seem like this can happen to anyone.
Enough is enough. Our techies have worked diligently to find a way to hurt Bieber’s marketing and access to children, and the way most kids get their information and music today is through the internet.
We have worked with the American Family Association to pray for F.A.T labs and independent groups to be able to bring you the following technology. It will require that you install the Mozilla Firefox browser as your computer’s main engine, which you can do at Mozilla.
Next, visit our favorite page here and download the Shave Bieber add-on for Firefox. This technology will literally make gone any Bieber reference from appearing on your computer! All Bieber MP3 and videos will become broken and obscured!
This technology will spread and make it so parents can block Justin Bieber from any computer and his popularity will fall, and he will be left sitting alone and sullen at lunch like a loser. No one will want to be his friend because they will have forgotten all about him.
This is just more proof that by the power of prayer, we can enable others to help do Christ’s work in making the world a more pure place.
Here is a video of how this technology fully works.
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Bren Langford
Born and raised in SoCal, Bren Langford is currently a student, lifeguard and lifestyle editor for ChristWire Campus Weekly.
“As you know, Justin Bieber is a new threat to young boys and girls worldwide. Hollywood producers are using Bieber’s effeminate voice and seemingly innocent looks to peddle off lesbian pride shirts at Hot Topic, help rappers like Ludacris sell albums and even have sexual thoughts and experiences at a young age.”
How is he a threat?
Citing your own articles doesn’t exactly prove your point.
“Enough is enough. Our techies have worked diligently to find a way to hurt Bieber’s marketing and access to children, and the way most kids get their information and music today is through the internet.”
What techies? You just hired a group to make an addon for Firefox, which they did probably because they thought it would be funny.
The internet does not block Bieber from accessing Facebook, or any other site, which means it doesn’t censor access to children.
But it is a good prank thing. And you probably shouldn’t have called the video Justin Bieber Shaving. I think you just disappointed a lot of fangirls there, and made a few pedophiles sad.
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wait is the christian trying to do like china did 6 month ago with facebook ( now they unblocked it ) oor wikipedia do you try to CENSOR internet as well what about your “freedom of speech and press” oh My did I got you down you are worst than the chinese and it’s a reality
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It works!!! Prepare for the troll face, Christwire imbeciles!
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Now, it is gone. Oh, Christwire! I hope you are not interfering with my freedom of expression…
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I think you snd Dan Nordgren are in love with Justin Bieber. Personally I think he’s over rated.
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This is so fucked up!
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Agreed. Tyson and all the other “authors” are probably just AI programs, run by complicated algorithyms.
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This is really awesome. I shared it on my Facebook and forwarded to people a few years older with kids, so hopefully it will start making it through their circle of friends. I am also starting an email to send out so people can forward it to others on Outlook while at work.
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Read: I spammed everyone’s facebook pages with shit they don’t care about because I’m Adam Nelson!
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What’s sad is, I think I know you. Wow.
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I don’t actually know anyone named Clark.
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So you’ve teamed up with fatties to remove Justin Bieber from the internet.
Sounds sexy.
This will especially work for the millions of firefox users who actually don’t have a clue what an addon is and actually are not actively looking for one, even if they wanted his references gone.
This is like trying to stop a flood with a paper cup. Sure, you’ll catch water, but you’re not going to stop anything.
tl;dr
INTERNETS TECHNOLOGY? THAT IS BLACK MAJIK VOODOOZ
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I agree with the cup/ flood comparison. His attempts are the least valid, and using such simple techniques will not interfere with Bieber’s popularity, at all. Only a severely fraudulent and false piece of information would do the job; however, it would have to reach all fields of the media. His attempts are pathetic and he is wasting time… For some reason; though, it is not surprising.
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The best part is that even if it reached all the media… All the media ever… Most people have no problem with Justin Bieber, as the kid is seriously just another fad. He’ll fall into the same “Hey do you remember that guy… What was his name?” as Hanson, *Nsync, Backstreet Boys. Ohhh, every few years throngs of fifteen year old girls just seem to cling to whatever generic pop sensation that flies out of the hands of some very fortunate record company.
Also, if they remove him from the internet, what on earth will they talk about here? Bieber is their bread and butter. Bread and Bieber.
Or whatever.
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well I know How to use add on but why should I have add on I didnt even Know about Him until you started making article about Him and surely a lot ofm people didn’t know about Him either
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I find it hard to believe that the people of Christwire could manage to develop anything more complicated than a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
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While I am glad to see you excitedly discussing my work, please redact portions of your article that claim you worked with myself and or the Free Art & Technology Lab on this project. This information is incorrect and misleading. Praise be damned, and save yourself from hell 2.0 by correcting your article.
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Also, OMFGWTFBBQHELL.
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Thank you for this technology and I am one of those who joined the prayer committee for us to find a way to stop Justin Bieber from fornicating our children so again just really thank you and may you have great blessings for this service because Bieber really scares me and also I worry for my daughters as they and their friends listen to his music.
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“J Turner”, why does Adam Nelson’s page link to your comment?
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You really want to Know ???
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isnt it priests that fornicate with children
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standar christian : ” how dare you infreindge on our freedome of speech” *5 minutes later* “CENSOR THAT SHIT!”
gotta love it right?
btw sexual thoughts at that age is normal. it’s kinda what the hormones you get pumped full of at that age does.
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at least chinese are not hypocrite about “pseudo freedom of speech” they know there is thing that need censoring
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Poem a Christwire
One visit to Christwire,
And I see all the satire.
Many authors who are not smart,
Their racist and prejudice behavior shows they have not one heart.
Many posts against mastubation,
And many rants about how they hate the leader of our nation.
Abe could be Adam Nelson’s bitch,
While Amber is a dumb witch.
I don’t know why they hate all gays,
Clearly some of these people need to get laid.
I’ll always hate this site,
For I believe all humans have certain unalienable rights.
Fin
This poem may be simple, but it clearly represents Christwire, with precision.
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There once was a website called christwire,
That specialized in idiots for hire,
They condemn Jews and blacks,
And launch personal attacks,
And they hope you all burn in a fire.
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Or alternatively
There once was a website called Christwire,
Steeped rich in the worst kind of satire.
They’re trolling the ‘net,
One thing you can bet,
Call them out and they’ll deem you a liar.
Damn this poetry crap is fun. I might have to make all my comments lyrics from now on.
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Whoops, I mean limericks. Spell check, 4:17am, etc etc
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wow Nice poem and so true you should send it to a newspaper or somewhere to be published
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Even though I think this site is completely whack, I hope to heaven that this app is forreal. I’m gonna go download it right now.
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Bierber is a pervert. Good riddance.
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Who is this ‘Bierber’?
Did you mean ‘Bieber’, perhaps? Or ‘Billings’?
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justin beiber is a cutie. but i am too old for him <—- 20 year old girl
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Bieberz by Handles
Take a werd from yer Handles,
Walk a mile in my sandles,
De werld is a twisted place,
Gettin tired of Bieberz face.
I’m a man who gots no fear,
I’ll make my werdz plain an clear,
Limelite godhood isn’t swell,
You’ll trade heaven in fer hell.
All dose Bieberz fans R n00bs,
Dey don’t evin got no boobs,
Dey mite not evin sho it,
But dey can all go blo it.
De’ve got nothin to swagga,
Got no bootie to shagga,
De’ve got a skrach dey can’t itch,
Can’t wait to shaddup deir bitch.
His “art” is far from flawless,
Like his fans can’t go brawless,
Teenie-bopper gutter-snipez,
Buy into de Bieber-hypez.
Deir lozin all deir sensez,
Chokin on small uffencez,
Deir fightin fer him looks odd,
If hez sucha demigod.
Up an away – here we go,
Dis Justin Bieberz doe-doe,
Want to get him off dose screenz,
An mess me up dose preteenz.
Dey still ain’t got no boobies,
Dose liddle Bieberz n00bies,
I’m not lookin fer no thanx,
Justa knockin up dose skanx.
A Bieberz revolushun,
No-Bieber constitushun,
A no-tallent apartheid,
Itz a Bieberz Biebercide.
Shootin down aspirashunz,
Media constipashunz,
Itz anuff to give me gas,
All his fans can kiss my ass!
-To my bruthas in hip-hop:
“Run wit it – have fun wit it” ~ Handles
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I am 39 years old, and yes, that is probably ancient to some of you. However, it is true that with age comes wisdom.
History has a perverted way of repeating itself… over and over again. I remember the insanity of the Cabbage Patch Doll craze that saw elderly grandmothers being violently knocked down to the floor and people being trampled in toy stores all across North America in the mad rush to get that butt-ugly doll. I remember something similar happening regarding the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I remember the unreasoning hysteria over Elvis, Michael Jackson, The Beatles, Madonna and Milli-Vanilli. In every case, there wasn’t any objectivity from the media let alone any responsible handling of the subjects. Only a load of media hype and tripe. That is, until Justin Bieber came along.
What sets Justin Bieber apart from the aforementioned fads is the nature of this fad. It is by far more political, intrusive and aggressive in its nature. Wherever you go on television, radio, the Internet or the printed media – he’s there. No folks, this isn’t a simple case of reporting the news let alone acknowledging someone’s talent. This has become an issue of the powers governing the media going so far as to TELL people what they are to like. I believe this is a social experiment of sorts being conducted on the most vulnerable members of our society: targeting our youth and even pitting them against their parents. It is an application of brainwashing in its most sinister and devastating form. It needs to be resisted and stopped, otherwise who’s to say where it will take us next?
Perhaps the Anti-christ?
Don’t laugh! This breed of social brainwashing worked for every politician and dictator in recorded history. Think of the Caesar worship of Rome, the Emperor worship of China and Japan, Hitler, Stalin, Lennon, the Kennedys, the Clintons. Getting people to mindlessly fawn over a pint-sized celebrity may seem like nothing to us adults, other than totally laughable. However, it programs our children to act in an unthinking manner that will have life-long consequences affecting them unconsciously in adulthood. If you teach a child from an early enough age to unquestioningly believe that 2 + 2 = 5, they will grow up believing it regardless of whether people insist they are wrong. I am not suggesting that Justin Bieber is a dictator. What I am asserting is that the media has successfully made an astounding number of people believe that Justin Bieber is beyond reproach and that anyone who doesn’t like him are “haters” who deserve death threats. This is powerful as it can, and will be used in the future to shape and manipulate the politics of a grown-up Bieber fan base who will neither realize, nor recognize what has been done to them psychologically.
The Shaved Bieber Add-on is far more valuable than you might realize. You are empowering every concerned parent to take back the control of their computers from external intruders. I encourage you to go beyond browsers and include add-ons for Internet Security software (Symantec-Nortons, PC Tools, AVG, Spy-Bot Search and Destroy, etc.) since they can be pass-word protected to prevent any attempts to bypass restrictions.
I applaud you, and wish you the very best! Thank you for Shaved Bieber!
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Do you know how many people have been labeled as an antichrist?
I won’t even bother listing them but there have been many.
My point being that all those people have turned out not to
be the anti-christ. Why? because there is no christ and there
is definetly no anti-christ.
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i personaly would like to sue him. me nd a friend of mine were on chatroulette and we came across him. i am not a fan. I was only being nice to him and then my friend tryed to talk but he kept wanteing to see me and said i have nice breasts and told me that if i show them to him he would send us free tickets. i refused and told him that that was wronge and i was engaged. he still did not care and asked me again and told me i was loesing my cance. I refused again and he nexted us. he is a perve and i would like to go to court for it sady the only proof i have is a picture of my laptop and my webcam showing my face and his and the conversaton automaticly deleted. he thinks that just because he his famouse he can do or get girls to do as hes asks them to do does NOT give him the right to violate other ppl.
if there is a way to do soomthing about this that WILL handle him sombody please tell me and reply. I am a human being and so are many other girls. This is not right
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I laughed at this at first…then I realized you were serious.
Now I’m sad.
I was raised Catholic. Normally I’d be quoting my “judge not lest ye be judged” at you for this article, but it seems a bit pointless. The important thing that most Christians of your extreme leanings seem to disregard is the fact that the Bible is a symbol. It is not a literal text that we should be following word for word. If it were, you, as a literal follower, would be advocating a battery of unsavory things that our generation has claimed immoral or obsolete, such as keeping slaves or not eating shellfish. Some of these were common sense rules for a period of time, but that was a thousand years ago. Today things aren’t as black and white. We have refrigeration, birth control, and medicine. We have strict morals against the slavery of humans, we have laws allowing women rights, and, of course, murder and rape are highly punishable crimes. The fact that the Bible even mildly condones these things makes it impossible for you, the man of faith, to turn a blind eye and claim the Bible is a infallible text. Humans are fallible, thus the Bible is fallible, as the Bible was written by men, not God.
Your claim that Justin Bieber will cause young people to “have sexual thoughts and experiences at a young age” is patently ridiculous. The average age of the onset of puberty today is about 10.6 years and dropping, due to a variety of factors. Obviously, this is cause for concern, and I personally this should be an object of interest as opposed to meaningless pop stars who will inevitably fade out. When your son or daughter reaches puberty, they will have sexual thoughts, not because they are unclean, but because the human body has reached an age at which they are able to reproduce. It’s disgusting to me that anyone would shame a young person for having sexual thoughts, which are entirely normal and expected. Additionally, what has statistically been proven to help abstinence is the parents’ involvement and education of normal sexuality, an education that should include a talk about safe sex, potential dangers, and normal behavior. If the teenager has an open environment where they feel safe to discuss their emerging sexuality, this will effectively delay sex for several years. A pop star has nothing to do with whether or not your child will have sex at 15, or at 30.
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