Mexican Create Secret “Gringo” Masks To Blend In

Abe
• ChristWire
May 6, 2010 10:28 pm33 comments

Dear friends, I am currently hiding under my blanket in a undisclosed hotel room here in the city. I am not supposed to make outside contact due to my being a duty judge now, but I have discovered that my new cellar robot Droid phone has access to the interconnected world wide web (www). Neat. I can make secret communques and this one is urgent.

It’s the Mexicans. As I talked to a fellow judge today, we both discussed how the Mexican on trial was guilty and then got to talking about the secret illegals who bring all their sick pervert diseases into our country: swine flu, bacteria, dirt language, drugs and so on. Filth!

He informed me that the Mexicans are using a new sort of mask technique to make themselves look like us normal Americans. They call us normal people the “gringoes”, which means “normal” in Mexican.

Please, if you notice a person’s face looks suspicious please ask them to rub it vigorously so as to do their duty in making sure we keep our nation illegal free, as the law says we are to do.

Be warned all true Mexicans should be considered armed and/or dangerous, and they can also ran as fast as a roaches. It is our duty to cleanse America of them or they will spread twice as fast!

I cannot go into details as I have to hide under my covers in case they have my room camera bugged and spied upon like Soviets do and this is taking long to write on my phone pad on these small buttons.

Please review the following image media so as to see an example of the masks these Mexicans are using to trick us and try to walk as one of us Americans. Due to your duty to God and country by upholding the law and aprehending all Mexicans. Thank you.

Sincerely,

- Abe Goodman: Juty Duty at Law

Image Evidence: Secret Masts Being Created by Mexicans

Warning: True Mexicans should be considered armed and or dangerous. A bite from one may result in serious illnesses such as swine flu. Please call your local immigration services or police if you come across a specific herd of Mexicans.

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33 Comments

  • I would not have believed it unless I saw it with my own eyes. How pathetic. These things look fake, any Arizona peace officer will be able to tell the difference. Do they color their hands with white makeup, too? The people behind this could be arrested for aiding and abetting, couldn’t they?

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 5

    • To paraphrase Fight Club:

      The people you are insulting are the people you depend on. We clean your streets, we cook and serve your meals, we fix your cars, we package your groceries, we haul your trash, we connect your calls, we drive your ambulances. We guard you while you sleep.

      We play nice. If we stop playing nice, your pretty little world with its firefighters and emergency services and triple-espresso mocha lattes, it goes up in flames and no-one will hear it happen.

      One good reason. That’s all we need.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 16 Thumb down 2

      • The Other Bob

        To paraphrase this last post:

        Hi. I’m a TERRORIST and need to be exterminated.

        Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0MRmxfLuNto&NR=1

    watch this clip. do it. it’s all i can give as a response.

    oh btw. you are not a judge. you are part of the jury. something you have clearly lied to become part of (asumeing that lie isn’t that you are telling us you actually are part of it) seeing as your personal bias against mexicans would make you unable to be part of a jury.
    also a few more points. secret? how the hell is this secret?
    and why the hell would anyone hold you under observance? i’f you are so scared of being founf out what would you do if we link this article to the local authorities so they can see you posted this bullshit not only whille you were not suposed to but also makeing you compl,etly unqualified to be part of the jury?

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 11 Thumb down 0

  • MikeyBoobs

    “New cellar robot Droid phone” Classic

    So we should go after people with fake faces. Looks out Joan Rivers! and half the women in Los Angeles!

    Oh, Your always covered in bacteria and you have bacteria in your digestive system that helps you digest food. Live bacteria is added to most dairy products. It’s comes from everywhere!

    Finally, I know you’ve heard this a thousand times. But I have to say this again. your a racist ass!

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 5 Thumb down 0

  • “Communques.” “Dirt language.” “Gringoes.” “Means “normal” in Mexican.” “Have my room camera bugged and spied upon.” “Aprehending.” “Abe Goodman: Juty Duty at Law.” “Secret Masts.” “Herd of mexicans.”

    Okay, Abe, here we go.

    Communiques. Basic spelling error.
    Dirty language. Stupid spelling error.
    Gringos. Foreign language error.
    Means “Foreigner” in Spanish. Basic research error.
    Have had my room camera bugged. Complex grammar error.
    Apprehending. Simple spelling error.
    Jury Duty. Letter misplacement error.
    Secret Masks. Another letter misplacement error.
    Group of mexicans. Idiotic collective noun error.

    You had nine paragraphs. You made nine very basic errors. How do you manage this? I’d have to really try to make this many errors in this short a space.

    Plus, you’re clearly a lot dumber than they are if these masks work against you. I pity you, Abe.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 2

  • Derek Van Buren jr.

    Main Stream Media has been exploding with news of caucasion neanderthal interbreeding. Essentially there are no more neanderthals becasue white people interbred with them and dissolved them in the gene pool. I know this sounds dangerous and perhaps should be left to our brave military, but I suggest that we repeat this effective tactic. If strong white men and women step up and take several latin lovers, we should be able to erase any trace of the mischievious chicano invaders within a generation of two.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 1

  • BVobTheChairGuy

    “Warning: True Mexicans should be considered armed and or dangerous. A bite from one may result in serious illnesses such as swine flu. Please call your local immigration services or police if you come across a specific herd of Mexicans.”

    I am now 75% sure this site is satire. The other 15% thinks someone is using Abe’s account in a useless attempt to make him look stupid. I’s ok, whoever you are, he manages that by himself.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 8 Thumb down 0

  • Truely these Mexicllie folk are becoming more clever by the minute. Their ability to adampt to these circumstance has passed the rate of alarming, into the border of very alrming. If their mask-creation technology advances, soon they will be able to develope creams and pigments more closly resembling the skin-tone of a true American. Has the documentary “WHite Chicks” taught us nothing?

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

    • oh dear lord it’s oficial we have new shameful truth on our hands.
      seriously….documentary?

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

      • Merican is a troll, and he’s very bad at it.

        Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

        • and that is basicly shameful truth.

          Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

        • Again with the trolls. Young man, you have an obession. I would speak with a priest. I wish you well on your road to recovery!

          Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

          • An obsession with the truth should not be considered a flaw.

            Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

    • The Wayne’s Brothers are responisible for 2/3rds of the Nations education towards the pigmented races. What cause do they have to decieve?

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1

  • American Science

    Abe is addressing himself as “jury duty at law”. Ladies and Gentlemen, we now have valid proof that this site is completely fake; a parody.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1

  • Swine flu came out of a large AMERICAN OWNED farm in Mexico.
    Your stupidity is quite baffling.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  • Two Words: FUCK YOU

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  • Not an idiot

    lol I am amazed at people who still think that the site isn’t satire…

    This shit is a joke, the whole site is a joke. I think that their funnier articles are actually the ones that make you wonder if it’s a joke.

    This is one of the super obvious ones, and thusly, is not as funny.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  • I understand that Mexicans should get visas and/or become naturalized, and I concur with that. But why hate on them so much? They do a ton of the work that everyone else will not. Spanish is a beautiful language, one of the best in the world, so watch yourself. English is actually somewhat uglier. Speaking of English, it’s obviously not your first language, as you can’t spell or use grammar very well at all.

    Your information is ridiculous and very wrong. Hahahaha. Racist.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1

  • satanfromhell

    wow, fucken trick as masks, for fuckwits,
    I hope the mexicans kill all the fucken christians

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  • Hello Abe. You display signs of paranoid schizophrenia. I suggest that you seek professional help immediately. The symptoms you exhibit could result in harm to you or the ones you love.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  • Pancho Villa

    I want to come clean…

    Soy un mexicano ilegal en America y he usado una “gringo mask” por tres años ya… al principio utilicé una de Ashton Kutcher pero era muy difícil imitar a ese magnífico espécimen. Ahora tengo una “gringo mask” de un average Joe, pero no paro de sentirme culpable ¡why cant I be a true american! I eat in McDonalds every day, I am pro guns, I support your war of terror! I would kill arabs, afghans and iraquis if I had the chance, really!
    So, Im posting this to ask for your help: if a kind christian soul would like to help me be more american and help me raise money for my foundation “Gringo Surgery for the less americans” I would apreciate all donations. Please go to my website http://www.face-amerimplants.org and donate!

    Gracias hermanos americanos!

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

    • Te entiendo hermano Less American!!!
      I have to come clean to, Im wearing the Paris Hilton mask, I’ve been taking Paris’ place for almost 7 years since she died from AIDS.
      Now I feel terrible please help me!!!!!

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  • Please kill yourself!

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  • I caught one. He looked like a normal white teenager, working at the Kmart. That should have been an immediate give-away, as all God-fearing citizens know that the Kmart is where Mexicans buy the ingredients for making methamphetamine in garbage cans. The perpetrator of God’s laws greeted me with an “Hola” in an obvious attempt to create cognitive dissonance within my Holy Spirit-filled mind, but I saw through his ruse….

    Right now, he is bound and gagged, and enjoying a free trip back south of the border in my ’79 Chevy pick-up. One less barbarous invader staining our great nation with his pigmented salubriousness.

    Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0