In the Bible, it is no secret that gays make God’s belly churn with disgust and hate.
To this day around the world, you can see how gays are upsetting God. He is striking down birds from the sky, burning down California and then flooding them for good measure, all while burying New York in mounds of frosted snow for their laws.
God is so disgusted with homosexuality you can see the he belly wretched bile upon the Eastern Seaboard.
It is funny when liberals try to say God is not punishing states for the most disgusting of sins, when you can just look and see how the states that are most foul to him he hits with the hardest cleaning wrath.
In this scientific diagram, you can see we have all the states labelled with their defiance to God in regard to homosexuality. We have surveyed the per capita practicing of confessed homosexuals and factored in the state’s official stance on dangerous agenda items like gay marriage and sodom legalization.
To extrapolate the complex polling data, we again collaborated with several of our student members at Kansas State University and University of Maryland. Months ago, we were able to calculate the intensity of sin across the United States using quantified complex survey research methods, and found the has a 2.3% deviation with a 96% level of confidence.
As you can see, the most moral states are highlighted in heavenly warmth of sunshine orange. These states bask in the glory of God as they say no those who love to sodomize the bod. Look at the moral states: Texas. Where the Good and Honorable George W. Bush lives. We have Kansas, a true state where Reverend Phelps has inspired the government to hold fast to its anti-feces laws. Molestors also hate the Kentuckys, Virginia and Floridas, where they will face the liberty of a shotgun and then hellwater should they dare dally a child like one out of four homosexuals are known to do, statistically.
What shocks the most here are states like Anal Alabama and Gallivanting Georgia, who are failing to burn gays with a deeper orange fire like all the more proper states. All the centrist anal enabler states on this map will eventually be visited by God’s wrath.
The Bible warns that God’s wrath will spill from the heavens, upon the worst of sinners during the end of days. Here we see the biles of iniquity spill from the sky and leave the weather reporters mystified as to what’s going on. Beware, nation of neo-Sodomites, for the power of God is without limit and his wonders just.
Worst though, we see the gay states, dressed in a mauve deep purple to represent a gay man’s after hours bruises and clothing. We have California, which is no surprise. With Homowood and San Francisco as your two main cities, it is lucky God hasn’t caused a giant volcano explosion to appear there like we saw in Iceland. You can rest assured though that when the wrath of God does appear, it will be spectacular and a summer blockbuster movie finish.
I will be earnestly watching the news with popcorn in hand, cheering the pyrotechnics as these magic fecaldom burns to the ground.
Further East, we see no more surprise as Iowa allows new-age cornhusking. If cowboy movies can now try to make it seem our forefathers on the range stuck their cattle prodders into each other’s dairy ravines, then it is not surprising to find the men of Iowa have corn hulls stuck in their teeth. What a sick state of creamcorn clam chowder homos.
Connecticut and Vermont, your blue blood riches will do you no good in the melting pits of Hell. The only currency down there is pain and suffering, and Satan will fill your flesh wallets with a heaping pile of it every single day and night.
Then we get to the worst state of all Massachusetts. When you go to this liberal breeding ground, you can smell the gentle waft of gay syrup basking sins waffling through the air. It smells of a somewhat distant cow pasture, mixed with 3am cigarettes and booze. It is the smell of a gay man’s breath and the entire state reeks of the liberal’s agenda to destroy America with gay marriage and even worst gay molestdoption.
Thanks to the concerted efforts of our research staff and fellows at K-State who helped crunch the numbers, we will be able to predict the weather patterns and shake our heads in understanding as God nails these homostates down to the wooden boards of justice, where we will watch as fire is poured on them and the juices of their combustible fecal sins will burn miles high, just like we see happen in the lush chaparral regions of Sizzling Southern California.