Several weeks ago, beloved exhibitionist and pseudo-singer Katy Perry got married to Russell Brand. They were married in India and as one could figure, there were certain people who raised a stink over the issue.
Does Katy Perry have a lesbian agenda? Who knows. She definitely uses her body to sell music to people who like to stare at breasts. Hence, every time you see her she looks like a twice-drunk Norwegian beer wench who had her costume designed by a horny Hagar the Horrible. Remember when Sunday comics were good?
At any rate, one thing you may not want to remember if you’re a Katy Perry fan is what she looks like without makeup. Russell Brand is a bizarre guy. He doesn’t strike me as the sort of person who is down with ‘stability’ or being loyal. Oh look, evidence!
So if he’s waking up to this every day, and calculating the half-life of Hollywood marriages sits at a whopping 3.5 weeks, we should be seeing some scandal headlines about Brand whipping out with a harem of dancing Spanish eye-charmers any day now.
Hello, hide your kids and hide your wife. And hide your husbands, because that is a rough face we have here. Not even Antoine Dodson could scare away that bed intruder.
I would rather turn over and wake up to Lindsay Lohan’s foul and yeasty hellbeast 60 years from now, then to have to see this and then listen to it sing in the shower.
Okay, that’s harsh, but so is what “artists” like Katy Perry and her ilk of auto-tuned rascals doing to the world of modern music. What girls kissed her again?