• Charlie Sheen Goes Crazy, World of Warcraft to Blame

    March 9, 2011 1:20 am 49 comments

    The world watches the downfall of Charlie Sheen, trying to figure out what has caused the Two and a Half Men star to hit rock bottom. Drugs? Ego? Obama? Multiple Psychoses?

    As the public media circuit wrestles with these questions, there is one telling quote in the series of crazy ramblings by Sheen that brings the source to his crazy to light.

    YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR THIS WARLOCK!”

    For those not in the know, World of Warcraft is a Satanic sorcery game that is made for children. It is the product of a Japanese video game firm named Blizzard and since its launch in 1999, has addicted 20 million people worldwide.

    There have been numerous stories of how this game has caused children to engage in blood orgies and some have gone into death wrenching seizures from playing the game for too long.

    Such tragedy has not put an end to growth of players of this dangerous game and now we see, Charlie Sheen is the newest victim of its cold Satan clutches.

    On the game, there is a breed of Earth demons named Warlocks. As their name suggest, they engage in a constant Lock of War, making them avatars of the false Greek god Ares.

    The game uses subtle brainwashing techniques and primitive graphics to convince those who play as the “Warlocks” that they have mystic powers and ability. This causes them to be delusioned and eventually, to lose touch with reality.

    Warcraft is also renown for its ComicCon swinger festivals, where people come dressed as characters from the game and engage in random games of fornication. These acts are often toasted by the drinking of a Tiger’s Blood cocktail, which is what we’ve seen Sheen drinking all this week.

    Charlie Sheen is acting bizarre because of World of Warcraft. Like 64% of all addicted players, Sheen is experiencing delusional hallucinations and neural loss to the hippocampus of his brain. World of Warcraft is causing Charlie Sheen to lose memory of his true self and become something he is not: a warlock monster.

    Looking over Sheen’s history will likely reveal he bought into the Catalysm Release of Warcraft. As the name implies, the risk of this game is leading people into lives of chaotic cataclysm. The fall of Sheen is a testament to this fact and this is more proof of why parents should remain vigilent in keeping this dangerous game from any child’s grasp.

    Just imagine, your child could be hopped up on Tiger’s blood cocaine and snorting hooker STDs, all while waving a machete from a Malibu rooftop. It can happen, just look at Sheen and let the lesson be learned.

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    About The Author
    Thad Connely The gentleman of choice, Thad Connely brings experience of two familial generations of news coverage and hard biting reports.

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