• Why is Suri Cruise is Eating Penis Gummies In this Picture?

    March 16, 2011 4:40 pm 4 comments

    I know the gay agenda is rife in California but there is no excuse for parents to let their children eat of their candy. You all know the stats. 43% of all gays suffer from gay bowel disease and 68% of them have typically easy jobs in nursing and secretary positions, meaning they usually sit straining for on the workplace toilet all day and fantasizing about pink blowholes and how to capture normal people and children in their gooweb of sin.

    You would think this all seems far-fetched and absurd, but then you try to figure out WHY there is a gay penis chew gummy candy!

    Suri Cruise Eating Penis Gummies

    What we have here is Katie Holmes and none other than her adorable daughter Suri Cruise.  You will recognize that last name because it belongs to Tom Cruise, the questionable Y-gene actor.   In the child’s hands, you can see she is holding a gay candy.  It says “Penis Gummies” and this is another after-school special trick of the gay agenda.

    One of the most ancient strategies of Classic Gays is to lure children to a beat up van or car with promises of puppy petting or a box of candy.  Gays will dangle this candy in their arm out the car window and say, “Hey, can you tell me the way to Sesame Street little boy?  Come on over and even if you can’t you can have some of this candy.”

    That is terrifying and why every parent must warn kids stay away from stranger dangers.  The gay arm dangle is a class move, but now you can see the propaganda savvy gays are using subconscious marketing techniques to trick even Hollywood parents into letting their kids be fooled into accepting the homogay agenda as normal.

    Gays are inherintly sneaky and crafty by their very nature, making them twice as dangerous and making it mandatory for us to track the origins of their ever sprawling deeds.

    Initial research into this Penis Gummies agenda reveals an Amazon page the gays have crafted.  For only $6, any person can arm themselves with this candy pouch and put it in their stores.  Think about this, parents.  Does your child use Facebook?  Do you realize that over 6 billion people on Earth have potential access to a computer and therefore can access Facebook and your child.  Odds are, your child will encounter a stranger on Facebook and one of them has an Amazon account.  Will they use this to lure your child?

    Penis Gummies

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    Penis Gummies

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    What’s even more terrifying here, is that it offers ‘discreet shipping’. This means we cannot track down who is ordering these things in mass and selling them at their private stores.

    Looking at this candy, it is clearly designed to make young boys turn gay and to make girls have questionable moral character. Combined, this candy will help create a confused, homosexual friendly society of rotted teeth and even more rotten morals.

    Friends, the gays have an organized agenda. The modern movement started in the mid 1990s, when they put the soft-faced Ellen DeGeneres in the public eye. Ellen admitted she was a gay sinner and the moral majority of America demanded an end to her show and network executives complied.

    But the gays are smart and resourceful, too. They knew the biggest obstacle to having their ultimate agenda of fecal orgies and lesbian fish swaps on every corner for every gender and age was to win the hearts of America, to make the concept of gay a fresh, comfortable topic at the dinner table. They wanted the concept of gay to be a household name so that everyone will smile when Mr. Gay Secretary makes a sassy quip on a corporate office sitcom, or they say “phallus tart dandies” on a sugary drink mix and parents will not think twice about mixing it up and serving it to little Johnny with lunch.

    Like a rippling jungle cat, gays quietly stalk and hunch in the darkest of secret shadows, backs arched as they are in heat and trying to fill their insatiable bloodlust to devour innocence.   Belly grumbling for an innocent, squealing meal, the gays will suddenly strike where we least expect and feast on prey, the prey being our innocent children and unaware men.  Thank goodness the illustrious Tyson Bowers III exposed the Wonder Woman lollipop and the monstrosity you see here, the Wolverine Blow Up Doll with an exposed ‘Twiddle Rompus” for kids to blow him up.

    This Penis Gummies candy is in the same line of shocking gay marketing and you can see it has already taken over the parents of Hollywood.  Now how many suburban moms are going to rush out to buy their sons and daughters the trendy ‘Penis Gummies” so they can be cool and hip?  How many children are going to make some homo happy by playing a round of magic ranger wands and tallywhack twiddle bath time in a park’s restroom this summer?

    This candy is more devious than the gay ice cream truck, because everyone loves gummy bears and gummy worms.  Now we see the gay plan to worm inside everyone’s dirty hole is coming closer to you.  Let’s beware this product and warn all family and friends. 

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    About The Author
    Tiernan Kincaid

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