Atheist Evolutionists and Creationist critics are borrowing some strategies from the homo gay community in the continuing war against Christians by using beards. These Godless monkey’s uncles are trying to win arguments and break free of their well-earned stereotype of hapless hairier-than-a-goat “Darwin” appearance with debate distracting hipster facial fashions.
“But Jesus had a beard! Why would Atheists ever wear a beard?”
Atheists are punctuating their evolution arguments with asymmetrical facial hair shaved and sometimes stripe-dyed to resemble the tail of a monkey wrapping around the face and under the nose.
When seeing this for the first time, the mind is sent reeling with how this facial hair got so monkey-fied. Did they cover their face in gum paste or sticky juices while a hair shedding monkey sat on their shoulder? It can throw a serious debate or discussion off kilter and that is what the Atheist Evolutionists want to happen.
But What Can I Do to Defeat this Intimidating Menace?
Be on the lookout for the Monkey Tail beard and look at as many examples as you can so you can desensitize yourself to this distracting debate method.
Duct Tape that Sucker. Many of these monkey wearing bearded hobos are heavy drinkers. While passed out under the influence, one can easily use stealth and speed to one’s advantage. Duct tape has a 1001 uses, this is number 639. Remember to pray first.
Call your local chamber of commerce and education boards to support an adopted acceptable beard policy for employment. Just as it is not acceptable for a man to wear a dress, it should not be acceptable for a man to look like he’s got a monkey on his face.
Use social shame. “What is wrong with your face?” said in a crowded area can shock the goat cheese back into some of these youngsters. After all they are simply following what they see as the cool crowd.
Who knows what these crazy Atheists with their Evolution pandering are thinking! One thing’s for sure, they rejecting the visually pleasant, symmetrical beards like Jesus and Moses wore.
Just take a look at these examples, Mom must be so proud – NOT!