• Beelzebub Gives Brooklyn Skateboarder His Star of Approval

    April 17, 2011 12:37 am 19 comments
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  • Raised Fist Propaganda, a skateboard company from New York, recently issued Brooklyn based skateboarder, Chris Kent, a board with his name on it. Although skateboards were notorious for shocking graphics in the 1980s, skateboarding has taken a newer, more wholesome approach in recent years due to the shocking number of the sport’s professional athletes turning to Jesus after long prison sentences.

    Chris Kent has apparently not gotten this memo (either that or simply hasn’t spent enough time behind bars). The imagery on his board is so horrifying and blasphemous that this particular Christian would not be the slightest bit surprised if the lord of Hades, Satan himself, personally goes to Mr. Kent’s house and gives him an uncomfortably long hug.
    This description is not for the faint-hearted. Continue reading if you must:

    the image appears like a Renaissance painting of the Madonna and child, only more like the whorish-rock-and-roll-Madonna and not like the Holy-Mother-Madonna. Madonna’s aside, the fact that her chest is prominent and whorish, is not even the worst part… Under a halo, inscribed “IN CHRIS KENT WE TRVST” the child – the infant Christ, in his very mother’s arms, no less, is – deep breath – headless. You read that correctly, “HEADLESS” as in “without a head.”

    To add insult to blasphemous injury, there is an enormous amount of blood streaming from the Holy Mary’s mouth, down onto her ample bosom.
    I feel ill just typing it.

    If you have the stomach for it; if you think you can handle it; go see the blood, headless Christ, and ample bosom for yourself…
    and pray.


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    About The Author
    apollonius_H_christ I live in new york and vow to make this blue state run red with the blood of the non-believers. In my church, my nickname is "the holy hand grenade."

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