• ChristWire Movie Reviews: Thor Will Turn Your Children Gay

    May 6, 2011 7:32 am 38 comments
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  • Much has been ballyhooed lately about the new movie adaptation of the Marvel Comic icon, Thor. Reports have it set to top $60 million at the weekend box office. Well, ten of those dollars belonged to Christwire, as I entered the gallery of sin known as my local AMC movie theater last weekend to bring you the full story behind this thoroughfare.

    I already expected this movie to contain blasphemy. They very idea behind it breaks the commandment stating that there are no other god’s but Jesus. I am an advanced theologian, though, and can withstand attacks like this without wavering in my faith. If you are not, please do not see this movie.

    One thing it will do is turn you homogay. The beginning was nothing but naked, greased-up men sexually arousing each other and harassing the audience with scenes of homo-erotic sex-play. There was even a rainbow bridge, depicted as the entrance to Thor and his buddies secret city of gays, and also their way out into the world. This is no doubt a implant from the homogay community in Hollywood to make your children wonder if they should maybe cross their own ‘rainbow bridge’ and see if they can find the city of gays for themselves, where they will only be raped and sodomized.

    The main character in the film is played by a strapping young Heath Ledger, who also played one of the homogays in “Backend Mountain”, a gay Jewish cowboy movie made a few years ago with intentions to shock the Christian community out of our gourd. It did just that, as no doubt his newest cinamafare will as well.

    The acting was second rate. I have seen better go on during the Christmas plays at my local church. It is no wonder this movie is being panned by critics and audiences alike. I could find no discernible plot between all the gratuitous scenes of blasphemy and homgayness. It seemed like the whole thing was just thrown together at the last minute in an attempt for some big time Hollywood Jew producer to hopefully turn his neighbor’s 10 year old boy who happens to like comic’s into a heathen homogay.

    After careful consideration, I give this movie a 6 out of ten on Satan’s scale of Sin, but it ranks a 9 on the homogay highway to Hell. Don’t let your eyes fall upon this one, lest they may be falling upon naked men later.

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    About The Author
    Alex Keating Alex K. Keating is a presidential hopeful currently seeking the Republican nomination. His likes include Fox News, Ronald Reagen , and exposing Communism. Fan mail can be sent to AlexKKeating@yahoo.com.

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