Brilliant prophet Harold Camping has revised the rapture to take place on October 21st, 2011.
As we saw on May 21st, God was not in the mood to throw a rapture tantrum and instead gave a yawn and took away Macho Man Randy Savage, a great source of joy and entertainment for America. Other than that, the day had no clear marking of wrath.
But Harold Camping called his secretary at Faith Radio to send out a memo that God has rescheduled the rapture to October 21st. God’s holy secretary Gabriel passed this information along and should be sending as a VIP.
Camping understood that millions of us were upset because on May 21st, we were supposed to be shuttled up to heaven in a glorious train and then have a great breakfast of pastries, bacon and ice, cold milk with Jesus as we laughed and talked, then looked down to hell and leftovers suffering on Earth to mock all those burning, suffering and enduring the pent up wrath of Satan.
But, we’re still here. Obama is still president. Immorals and atheists and the gays are still skipping and galivanting all around. No wrath!
It was all a miscommunication between God and Camping and we’ll see the wrath on the 21st of October.