• REV IT UP! 5 Holy Roadside Pilgrimage Destinations

    May 24, 2011 11:17 pm 5 comments
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    Vacation time is fast approaching! Christians are looking for the perfect family getaway that will build memories, promote Christian family values and lasting friendships. Here are 5 sightseeing destinations guaranteed to deepen one’s spiritual relationship with Christ and leave even the most radical god hating liberal speechless with wonder and awe.

    While everyone plans to visit the Creation Museum, these are some maybe less well known stops on a fun filled spiritual trip across the Christian nation we call America.

    Cross Garden “You will DIE, HELL IS HOT HOT HOT.” – Pratville, Alabama

    Nestled in Pratville, Alabama is the iconic Cross Garden where cross farmer and prophet William C. Rice was touched by the spirit when God answered his prayers regarding an ulcerated stomach. He listened to God’s message and warned others of the high interest on the wages of sin with his art work until his death in 2004. Located in Pratville, Alabama the Garden is worth a stop and visit.

    Hell is hot hot hot

    Before his death, WC explained his artistic method of bringing God’s message to sinners.

    “I get on one thing like it’s a river. I can’t answer all these questions, I tell people. I try to keep my mind on one thing while I answer the question. Like the ocean, too big. You just ask me the question and I’ll try to answer the question you know ‘cause I ain’t no educated man, I ain’t no smart man, I got my college degree, it’s the greatest degree of all, from God, Jesus and the Holy GIT DOWN, ROCKY! GIT DOWN!” – WC Rice, Artist / Prophet

    Precious Moments Inspiration Park in Carthage, Missouri

    What is more beautiful that a Precious Moments figurine? Not many things. The inspiration park is a true patriotic testament of God’s grace combined with capitalism and the free market of registered trademarks. The people could not be nicer with docents available to guide tourist through the holy message of the murals. While some have made comparisons to the Godless Japanese “anime” you will not find any pornography here – only God directed messages of faith and love.

    Precious Moments

    One Tourist had this to say:

    “The most interesting part of the chapel is that there is one unfinished angel on the ceiling. Apparently, PM creator Sam Butcher was in the middle of painting that angel when he became fatigued and disheartened and briefly considered giving up. Then he had a conversation with God and decided to finish the project after all. He left the angel unfinished to remind him that he almost gave up on the project except by the grace of the Lord… or something like that.”

    It is rumored that Sam Butcher is related to the horror writer Jim Butcher, author of the Dresden Files. Both reside in Missouri.

    Mortal Kombat Jesus – Washington DC

    For parents of children struggling with internet and gaming addiction, a visit to the Washington Basilica may be exactly what the doctor ordered. On the ceiling is the iconic “Mortal Kombat Jesus” which is sure to get youngsters interested in the passion of Christ.

    All your cats

    7 Wonders of God Creatures – Houlton, Maine

    “I have to make it look like junk, because if I put everything nice and neat, people will steal it.” – Jerry Cardone, Visionary / Personal Friend of Jesus

    Jerry in Happier days

    Jerry Cardone is a truly touched artist that inspires and delights visitors, while angering his agnostic neighbors. While the local unsaved gentry have bulldozers and flare guns prepared for the day of rapture, Jerry quietly sends a message of peace and love with displays that catch the eye and melt the heart.

    Art is, what words cannot bear

    From one visitor’s report:

    Jerry is pleased when tourists stop and take pictures of what he’s created. It stretches several hundred yards along US 2, a piled mass of boards, stumps, signs, and artwork, which includes everything from fake palm trees to a giant Indian head with tires for eyes to a portrait of Jesus from memory (Jerry met Jesus, too).

    UPDATE: Houlton, ME: As of May 10, the town of Houlton has exceeded the $25,000 in budgeted funds to clean up the 10 acre art site. According to the Bangor Daily News, the museum was found to be a nuisance and clean up was ordered by the court. The unsaved may have won this round, but the word of the Lord is infinitely more powerful than the government of man. No comments from Mr. Cardone. We hope he can find a new home for his contribution to humanity.

    Biblewalk and Living Bible Museum – Mansfield, Ohio

    Ohio is such a beautiful state. The Biblewalk and Living Bible Museum is a fun filled realistic wax diorama of stories from the Bible that bring the word to life more effectively than reading or watching a DVD. Sometimes called “the Wax Bible”, the kids will remember the money-shot vision of Job, covered in festering sores, as a clear message of God’s love (Job 2:7).

    Job with pox

    Visitors need to plan time to see the museum fully. The four sections are The Old and New Testament, which each take an hour to tour. A great follow up is the Museum of Christian Martyrs and Heart of the Reformation each take a half-hour. It is recommended that visitors stay the night and maybe break up the visit into two trips. Once a visitor enters the exhibit, it is automated throughout. You may not leave until the presentation has completed. The word condensed is powerful and can be overwhelming for some, so plan accordingly.

    It's suppertime!

    From a visitor’s notes:

    The 300+ dummies were purchased cheap from a defunct wax museum, and it’s fun to pick out the repurposed celebrities in the crowd scenes.

    We recognized Clark Gable and Margot Kidder (which probably dates the dummies from the early 1980s) and Elizabeth Taylor was prominent in the tableau of Solomon’s temple. A wet-looking Jonah strutting onto the beach might have been Burt Lancaster in another life.

    As wonderful as this museum is, it is not without detractors. I found this video on you tube of Catholics denouncing the evangelical faith, bragging about their so called Bible education and possibly mimicking homosexual George Michael by refusing to shave.

    Women should perhaps mute the sound this as these two are quite toxic in their musings and may pose a threat to pre-born children.

    I think that so many see these roadside attractions as an excuse to show aggression towards Christians, which is wrong. All evangelicals want is a place to visit and enjoy that doesn’t shove a homosexual or an evolution banana down one’s throat. Those that disagree should simply not attend or be quiet. To make such a fuss over someone’s beliefs is ridiculous.

    I think of Mr. Cardone in the example above. He derived true joy from God’s voice in his head and his junk yard of treasure. It was one humble gift that he could share with the world that no one else could. Yet the Pharisees of the town leaders, most likely jealous of the attention he received, judgmental of his complete faith and the joy he had in Christ, had to bulldoze the whole property. It is gonna cost a lot more than $25,000 to clean up the mess they’ve made. As WC Rice says “HELL IS HOT HOT HOT”.

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    About The Author
    Blanche Beecham "Blanche Beecham lends a soft, learned hand to the fourth estate with incite-full investigations on diverse topics such as Politics, Love, and Lifestyle. Her many years experience as a wife, mother, ladies book club president and financial auditor make her well suited to ferreting out the truth and giving it a sound shake." - Rev. Jackson Lee Whitebelley, Publisher and Editor of "The Incubator" - Follow me on Twitter! @BLANCHEBEECHAM

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