• Whispering Eye and The Beaver, A Guacamole Recipe for Disaster

    May 6, 2011 2:18 am 2 comments

    Teenagers are spending more than eight hours a week browsing the internet for soft porn, plastic surgery and family planning websites

    As time progresses, so does technology and its access to your precious child.  Does your teen son or daughter have a hip new Android or Apple iPhone?  Can you monitor their every move on these phones, to ensure they are not part of the new Batman sexting or vajazzling Facebook craze that’s hitting high school campuses as this school year winds down?

    These terms may be foreign to you and you are not alone.  If you were to be told “Took a Sip from My Devil Cup”, you make think it is a 70s rock ballad, when in reality, it is a dangerous drinking game being played at college campuses nationwide.

    The world belongs to the 2.0 generation.  The internet is streaming into the personal technology of your children.  And when it used to be the worst thing you had to worry about was your child running up a phone bill or listening to rap on their Sony Walkman, now you have to wonder if they are getting themselves tied into prostitution, drug and gang violence.

    Did you know that over 87% of teens use the web to access pornagraphs.  This is schoking to any good parent.  And of that number, 85% are engaged is libidinous activities that will lead to disease and/or pregnancy.

    While many parents try to block access to the internet, we’re finding that it’s completely impossible to ensure your child does not have an ‘online’ life.  Stats show that 45% of children up to 21-years of age are involved in creating profiles on dangerous sites such as Second Life, where all on the site create a ‘second life’ and engage each others in real mee-ups under false names.

    The most effective way to police children and protect them is stalking.  To effectively stalk your child, you must find ways to infiltrate their ‘online life’ while not revealing your true self.  It is a page right out of the Second Life handbook, employed by 2.6 million convicted criminals who are engaging your children on Myspace, Facebook and Friendster with their secret identities.

    Children as young as 2 or 3 have online identities.  Recent studies show 92% of 2-year-olds have established an online identity for themselves.  Can you imagine, you fall asleep and your precious 2-year-old is being enticed with flashy colors and awkward bird puppets telling them to ‘open the front door’.  Terrifying.

    To fully protect your family, you must remain vigilant.  The vigilance you need to be a good parent in the .com era is mainly understanding the lingo, or the spoken word, of the online world.

    By spying on your children by hacking into their iPhone (demaning your phone provider give you access to their text records or lose your business) and hacking into their Facebook or infiltrating by posing to be a younger sibling with a friend request. 

    Then there is the matter of understanding their language.  Here is a mini-primer that will be developed over time to help you investigate the language of the messages you find on their online profiles and phone messages.

    CHILD INTERNET LEXICON

    The Beaver = Secret Place

    The Whispering Eye = Secret Place

    Tamtam = Rod of Life

    Dobbie = Rod of Life

    LOL = Laughs out Loud

    GNR = Good Night Reefer ( a drug reference)

    Haha = Unholy coital acts (like hoohaa of the 70s)

    Magic Mint = Dangerously Addictive Party Drug Sold at Hedge Shops

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    About The Author
    Charles Atchison Subscribing to a policy of tough resolve and strong work, Charles Atchison is an premier journalist of humble Mississippi beginnings. When not writing, Charles enjoys flyfishing and is a locally reknown Ventude method chiaroscurist.

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