Yankee Blight of Hockey Kicked out of Atlanta
First the yankees brought fire and destruction to Atlanta, then they brought theirselves down here, then finally they brought the worst scourge of them all…HOCKEY!!!
For years we have been forced to pretend that we care about French Canadians skating around playing with heir pukes. But no longer! The great majority of Atlantians have rose up and decided to rid their great town of this evil menace!
Fans of the “sport” of hockey may realize that this is not the first time. The Flames left for Calgary in 1980and now The Thrashers are following them to Canada! The company to deliver us of this evil is True North Sports and Entertainment, which announced the deal during a news conference at Winnipeg’s MTS Centre, the 15,015-seat arena where the team will play. The news sparked a raucous celebration in Manitoba’s largest city, which is rejoining the league after losing the Jets to Phoenix in 1996. The deal is worth $170 million, including a $60 million relocation fee that will be split by the rest of the league, a source told ESPN.com.
As an insult to Atlanta, the Thrashers name which was coined by former owner Ted Turner and referred to the state bird of Georgia will not be going north of the border. The new team could also be known as the Jets, though a decision on the name has not been reached.
In Atlanta, there was little reaction, as people who live in 90 degree temperatures do not care about sports played on ice as it is not naturally occurring in god’s creation here, other than a tearful news conference held by co-owner Michael Gearon. He said the group that controls the Thrashers, the NBA’s Atlanta Hawks and operating rights to Philips Arena did all it could to find someone who would help keep the financially ailing team in the city. But no one made a serious offer, as good christians know that hockey does not belong in the SOUTH!
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Susan B. Xenu
Although over 80 years old, she is still a woman of unparalleled intellect and passion. She brings this spiritual fire to every aspect of her life. "Sister Susan" joined our staff in 2011 and has a fiery writing style on a diverse set of topics. A widow she lives in Atlanta, Ga and has been active in her church for over seven decades! You can now add her on Facebook or Twitter. Also read her Personal Blog.
7:52 pm
Good American football, baseball, and basketball are the only sports that belong in the United States.
And fishing.
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7:56 pm
Yes, and the occasional round of Golf.
And Boxing.
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8:06 pm
Let us not forget motorsports especially Nascar and monster trucks
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9:48 pm
There is nothing more American than monster trucks and tractor pulls. When the ice on the rink melts I’m going to ride my big lifted truck with mudder tires all over the place. god bless America.
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12:16 am
It’s in the 90s think of the amount of power it takes to freeze all that water!
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10:51 pm
There is something decidedly effeminate about men on skates. And have you ever seen their slap fights where they try to undress each other on center ice?
Its shocking!
Hockey sur glace is not an American sport and should be forced, at pitchfork, back into that socialist abortion loving country to our North!
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11:36 pm
I’ve always been uneasy about any sport where they chase a urinal cake and molest each other against the boards in front of a peepshow plexiglass.
Is it true that theirs glory holes in the penalty boxes?
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12:18 am
I dont know as I have never been to one of those.
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12:18 am
If they keep the ice maybe they can do Disney on Ice…or even better bible stories on ice!
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12:32 am
Should we invite Claire?
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12:35 am
she would just ruin it, that’s what claire does.
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12:35 am
Since Claire will be in “Christian Housewife Boot Camp” with Sister Susan soon, I believe she would be required to attend.
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12:48 am
I don’t think she will be happy about the “no cats allow” rule.
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12:56 am
I’ve actually had to rent spaces at 4 different kennels for all of her cats while she is in “Training” with Sister Susan. It a huge expense, but I pray it will be worth it in the end.
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1:54 am
Yeah, I guess she has to come along.
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1:02 am
Kennels or crematorium? I think the second will be a better solution.
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1:04 am
I have found the “Best” kennels to remedy my situation, if you get my drift.
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1:55 am
Drop them off behind the Chinese Buffet.
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2:17 am
That is 1 of the “kennels” I found, but they promise it will be a “Experience of love and respect for the felines and will be a tasty experience for all customers”, which I can only say, seems like they love cats and want their “kennel” customers to enjoy their vacation from these “demon animals” and know that their cats are in the hands of trained professionals.
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2:29 pm
I hope you both fall into a wood chipper for those comments. I’ll then come and scoop your remains into jars labeled “Strawberry Jelly” and mail them to your families as free samples from Smuckers.
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2:34 pm
Claire represents a child who has watched too much South Park. She is rambling with violence because she watched the episode where a child fornicated with a horse and then murdered several adults, putting them in chili and feeding them to the neighborhood. Shocking that this qualifies as a children’s cartoon.
Look at the words of Claire. This is the type of violent mind South Park begets in our impressionable youth. Now she is forever scarred.
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2:37 pm
She really needs professional help. Our church and sister churches are all praying that she finds it.
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2:51 pm
1. I’m not a child.
2. Cartman did not fornicate with the pony. His hope was that it would bite off Scott Tenorman’s penis, thus humiliating him in front of the whole town and in front of his favorite band, RadioHead.
3. Cartman himself did not murder Scott Tenorman’s parents. He lured them into the farm where the owner shot them for trespassing. Cartman then stole the bodies, cooked them up into chili, and fed them to Scott. He did not feed them to the town.
4. South Park is not a children’s cartoon. How many times have we been over this? First of all, the show is on Comedy Central, which does not show any children’s entertainment. Second, since its beginning in 1997, not one episode of South Park has been given a rating below TVMA – that means Mature Audiences. It also carries a disclaimer before the beginning of each episode.
5. If somebody makes fun of the killing of cats, I’ll make fun of killing them. Simple.
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3:14 am
Does your mother know the sinful acts you talk about on this website? Does Bruce’s mother? Your a shameful human being Claire. I am not sure that I want you in my home anymore.
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1:03 am
Baseball, football, basketball were all invented in Christ’s home country of the USA. Hockey comes from liberal Candada. They have gay marriage and government health care. Nothing good comes from this.
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1:56 am
Agreed, although I would appreciate cheap medications as it is getting expensive being old.
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2:21 am
My understanding is that the communists in Russia invented hockey and Canada picked up on the sport when an errant puck skidded across the bering strait. The Alaskans, being fine decent American Christ folk weren’t enticed so they let the puck keep sliding until it got to Canada, where it peaked the interest of the socialist leftees that overwhelm that godless land.
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8:04 pm
You’d be wrong there. On several accounts.
1) Hockey was invented in Montreal. More specifically at the Victoria Skating Ring.
2) Even if hockey originated in Russia (which it didn’t) the first recorded version of Ice Hockey was played in 1875. Now, basic knowledge of Russia would tell you that Russia was not Communist until October 1917. Ergo, Hockey could not have been invented by the Communists.
3) Good luck knocking a puck across the Bering Strait. And Alaska. If you manage it, do please let me know.
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3:16 am
typical hockey loving intellectual coming here and spouting science in a reservation of JESUS
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1:43 am
Hockey is one of the hardest sports to play but ignorant red necks cant comprehend that. And mostly all sports have some roots reaching to Europe but you guys think the u.s is the greatest country ever and calling every thing gay makes every one think america is stupid and its all your fault.
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8:47 pm
Who needs hockey, USA should stick to what it knows best, Losing wars, Cashing in clunkers, sleeping with kinfolk and forcing their women to have sex with black men while they videotape.
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