• Shocking: Man Spiffs Poor Cat in Its Hindparts, Iowa Gay Marriage To Blame

    August 5, 2011 9:33 pm 33 comments

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    Author:

    Adam Nelson


    Barnstool, IowaDevestated cat mews in horror after being the victim of Iowa’s support of gay marriage.

    Terrified beyond all belief, an Iowa community has a reality check into the dangers of gay marriage after a man admitted to spiffing a cat in the hind parts.

    One of the central themes of the Gay Agenda is that it is natural for a man to mate with a man. Gays advocate that it is normal for a woman to perform diving clamdabble upon another woman. The gubernatorial governments of many states are allowing gays to spread these lies and now a cat has painful orifice exits because of it.

    As mentioned time and time again, gays fantasize about pinkened sin holes. They care not the source of the orifice. In the culture of homosexuality, a hole with life is a place to perform a phallic splice. Liberals will argue and say this is not true, but if so, why is the following story of shock and digust coming from a state that allows gay marriage?

    The mugshot of a Council Bluff, Iowa, man stares into your face.

    Frantic residents of Council Bluffs rallied and spilled into chaos after allegatinos that a man threw a cat from a seventh floor apartment, and his pants were pulled down.

    The scene of the accident was chaos. Mothers cried and shielded the eyes of their children, as fathers watched in disbelief, “holding their hands and screaming on their cell phones”, according to one eye witness.

    When officers arrived, they purportedly found a gray cat with grievous injuries and barely sustaining its life on the sidewalk.

    According to police reports, several other witnesses corroborated the story and said they saw a man with no pants on and throwing a cat from the seventh floor of his apartment.

    Martinez is typical Mexican surname and a man identified as Gerardo Martinez answered the door “shirtless with his pants down”, said police officers. They asked the man about hte cat.

    The man allegedly admitted to using meth and then claimed his boyfriend threw the cat from the window. After several more interrogating questions from the officer, the man said he attempted to spiff the cat and then threw it out a window.

    If convicted, the man will face up to five years on various crime counts, none of which include homosexuality. And that is the problem.

    In a society where we do not keep marriage moral, between a man and woman like nature intended, people will naturally start to believe it is okay to twaddle anything else in an open hole. If a man can marry a man, why can a woman not have merry Little Lamb time with her grown sheep in the pasture? What’s to stop Dapper Danny from flinkling his koi in the secret of moonlight?

    The problem with homosexuality and gay marriage is that it is againt nature. The purpose of our reproductive organs is two-fold: one, we have our secret parts to expose to our wives, or women their husbands, to build up a bond of marriage.

    ==> Shock: Gay Marriage Causes Man to Attempt an illegal Sin-docking with Raccoon, Raccoon Bites Off Man’s Twiddle Rompus

    Women are the helpmeet of man and to serve as an incubator for our children. This responsibility is nearly universal among all advanced animals and therefore, God has invoked speciation to let us know right from wrong. It is right for a married man and woman to procreate and without genetic errors, this will occur.

    But no matter how many times to bottom’s up boys ravage each other in the deepest throes of Astrogliding release, they shall never produce a baby from all their sin sloshes of devil’s DNA and petroleum shame. Two Sally Scissors sliding and sighing until their sumptuous bodies all over each other, shivering and clenching until the release of sinful pleasure, shall never find a baby magically growing in their wombs. Lesbians would love to believe they had the power of Oogenesis, but it is not so.

    Friends, homosexality is the brainchild of Satan. His goal is to get us to waste our gift of life on perversion, so the numbers of moral households will rise and homosexual revelry will prevail. Look at the face of the cute kitten, so shocked that we are not protecing the innocent from the behaviors bred by homo-supporting law.

    I would like to see the stats, because I bet in New York there is now a decrease of stray cats, because they are all hiding in dark corners and alleys, trying to avoid the lustful eyes of liberals who are buying into the anti-nature, decency laws that go hand in hand with combatting the Federal Marriage Protection Act.

    Remember, Satan loves a cheerful sinner, so let’s make him sad by protecting all these kittens and standing up for Heterosexual Marriage Legislation in your state.

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    About The Author
    Adam Nelson

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