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YoutubeApple Unveils Emotional Phones (eMO Phone)
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RedditIn the 60s, we had hippies. During the 70s, jive turkey street punks and disco queen addicts. During Reagan’s 80s the moral majority took route in America’s high schools, but the punk rockers took hold once again in the late 80s through early 90s. Now in Obama’s dire days of the aughts, we have a new, dangerous high school trend. Emos.
Emos are children who believe they are the legacy of Vlad Tepes. These children believe they are little Twilight vampires and have a fetish for fake teeth and blood letting ceremonies, learned from ‘Vampirism for Dummies’ books they buy at their cult stores like Twilight and Borders. What’s scarier is that 58% of people who have seen JRK Tolkien’s Twilight series more than once have a 4/5 chance of becoming addicted to the taste of human blood.
This phenomena has scared many parents and yet, this dark, macabre culture of tight pants and unisexually applied makeups are being exploited by corporate executives. The latest offense to children comes from Apple who is releasing an ‘eMO phone’ to help these vile rabies spreaders talk to each other in emosexual methods.
The phone helps them ‘imitate hand holding, kissing’ so even when you ground them to their rooms, they can bypass your parental authority and play hanky panky with the same mascara faced gender! This phones are from the communist apple company and you know that the two Steves are Soviet Trotsky loving radicals.
Look at this video and ban the product from your home, parents.
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If you don't like what you just read here you can just get out of my country. Now how about that smart-alack.
Follow me on twitters. Poke me as your New Friend on Facebook!! 
This article is full of lies and stupidity
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This is full of facts, scripture, and research.
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Uh yea BTW, I’m part German, so yea, do I freak ppl out? Um no! I’m I horny 98%of the time?………………. Ok so u got me there.
Am I a vampire emo boy? No I’m a emo chick that wants to be vampire.
Point proven I win!
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“This is full of facts, scripture, and research.”
Please site one piece of scripture in this article.
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“JRK Tolkien’s Twilight series”
1. its JRR Toklien, and he’s been dead for years.
2. Its Stephanie Mayar who wrote to books, and shes a Mormon.
and the EMO “cult” has been going on before Obama became president.
also this has never been in development or even thought of. so guess what “This is full of facts, scripture, and research.” is compleatly fcking wrong.
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sorry miss-spelled Tolkien
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still an eMO Phone would be so badass!!!!!!! u don’t know how horny this made me
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you are the biggest pervert on this website.
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awwww thank u its so hard for people to notice my work now a days! XD
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Do you have a career? You should consider a career in nursing. Have you ever considered going into the healthcare profession?
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Adam, stop trying to get Alison into bed with you.
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I thought she mentioned she has an interest in healthcare. I’m always more than happy to help aspiring medical professionals achieve their goals. If Alison needs help in getting through nursing school and landing a great job, I would be honored as a good man and Christian to help. Let me know, Alison. I’m always here to help.
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Adam, you only care about tappin’ the ass of a hot chick. It’s not the first, nor will this be the last, time that you’ve hit on a woman here, in the hopes of ‘getting them a job in the medical field’, just so you can fuck’em in bed and then leave them high and dry. They’re nothing but trophies to you.
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i know adam the first game i make will be where you guys took over the world and the main character is fighting against you.oh wait thats not realistic at all you guys would purge everything you don’t like
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I TAKE THAT AS A CHALLENGE! Should I start posting hentai again?
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oh lol
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This app will never appear in my home. Good thing my children are not allowed to have electronic devices.
Plus the Germans just don’t seem to realize how creepy they really are. How are they going to freak us out next?
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This coming from a creepy guy. How ironic.
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Emosexuals are vile disgusting human beings. But the one thing that most of them have going for them is that they are not actual vampires. Although some are not too far away from it.
This is disturbing technology. How long will it be before they have phones that can give mouth sex acts?
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There’s an app for that. It’s call BITCH RECOGNIZE!
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This has nothing to do with Emo or Scene kids.
A better title would have been something along the lines of
Emotional Phones: The latest technology is actually quite disturbing
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THIS IS BOGUS!!! God doesn’t exist
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I would just like to say that not all emo people are into Twilight (in fact, I do not like and cringe when it is mentioned) and not all are into blood and such. Emo people are just those people who believe that they are misunderstood by society and try to individualize themselves. Vampirism is not at all related to emo. It is more closely tied to Goth. Being emo myself, I am horrified at the thought of being compared to the Twilight fans (which was written by Stephanie Meyers). Despite the fact that I am emo, I am a Christian and have been raised by a good Christian family. The whole make-up thing is actually optional. What does emosexual even mean? This term does not compute.
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Simply want to say your article is as surprising. The clarity in your publish is just cool and that i could assume you’re an expert in this subject. Well along with your permission let me to snatch your RSS feed to stay up to date with approaching post. Thanks a million and please carry on the rewarding work.
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