• Doctor Who comes from England to Invade American Children’s Minds and Backsides

    September 19, 2011 8:48 pm 373 comments
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  • A new children’s show from the heathen country of England has invaded God’s Country of America. That show is called “Doctor Who”. This show is centered around a time traveling pedophile who uses only his alias “The Doctor” to introduce himself to underage children after breaking into their bedrooms. He travels through space and time to molest small children’s bottom holes and attempts to kill off his female “companions” on every episode. Below are some reason why “Doctor Who” is an Evil, Anti-Christian show used to promote the Homogay Agenda and why we should have this show banned from God’s Country of America.

    Reasons Doctor Who is Evil:

    #1. He is a Hipster.

    Hipster Doctor Who

    Hipsters are evil people living off their parents and floating around aimlessly through life. Doctor Who floats around aimlessly through space and time. He also wears ridiculously tight, ill-fitting suits with bowties just like hipsters.

    #2. He hates Women

    In every episode of this show, “The Doctor” travels around with a female “Companion”, but also in every episode this “Companion” either dies or almost dies and this is always caused by “The Doctor”. If he did not hate Women, he would not continue to pick up random females every single week.

    Here are some photos of these unfortunate “Companions”:

    Billie Piper

    Random Black Girl

    The cast of Stargate SG-1

    All in One

    A Ginger Kid with No Soul

    The dog robot from Battlestar Galatica

    Billie Piper trying to seduce the Gay

    So as you can see, he goes through many different “Companions, as they always seem to die.

    #3. He uses a phallus shaped dildo that glows green and emits a “sonic” vibration to bother children’s sewer holes. He calls this item his “Sonic Screwdriver”, but it is quite obviously a green, glowing STD filled sin stick. He uses it to open children’s “cupboards” and peer into their “Dark Closets” for alien things.

    #4. He travels through Time and Space using something called a “T.A.R.D.I.S.” and that stands for “Transgender Anal Rectal Drug Injection System”. He uses this to drug his “companions” to put them in harms way, just so he can be a “Hero” and save them every single week.

    Here is a photo of the “T.A.R.D.I.S.”(looks suspiciously like a vagina):

    The T.A.R.D.I.S.

    #5. He promotes the Homogay Agenda. He and his life partner Capt. Jack Harness, who supposedly is immortal, fly around through space and time together making mouth sex acts and fighting aliens, only stopping to stick their twiddle rompuses into small boy’s backside sewer holes.

    Capt. Jack Harness and The Doctor making out

    #6. He fights against Angels and makes them Weep by him and his “Companion” using their phallus shaped weapons on them.

    Weeping Angels

    Companion chooses her

    #7. He calls himself a “Time-Lord”. We all know that there is only One Lord of Time and Space, and it is definately not a hipster who flys around using dildos to fight aliens.

    Does this look like a “lord” to you?:

    Not The Lord

    #8. All of the aliens he fights against look like a homogay’s twiddler rompus or backside sally dally. Here are some pictures of those “monsters”:

    Buttplug-like Aliens

    Vagina Monster

    So in conclusion, I have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that “Doctor Who” is a horrible Children’s Show akin to Star Wars and Star Trek, and should be removed from the Television moving picture box immediately. We should replace it with Good, Christian Entertainment like 70’s/80’s era BattleStar Gallactica or Buck Rogers.http://www.bbc.co.uk/doctorwho/dw

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    About The Author
    Bruce Myron Danus Years of Mental Gymnastics, and lots of love from Jesus has made this man realize he was not "Born this Way", but instead chose to be a Homogay until he met God and realized God doesn't make mistakes like a homogay.

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