• America’s Guide to the World

    October 7, 2011 7:48 am 28 comments
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    Author:

    Abe

    I suspect this Castillian cartography chart was made by some nasty liberals, but in their zeal to make America look bad they actually have an accurate map of what we need to know about the world.

    Today’s world is that of globalism.  America is the apex predator of capitalism, all other nations are our pray.  China is trying to take our throne, the hungry pack of hyenas trying to take down our mighty lion pride of unity and orange sunrise warmths.  But little does China know, the pride of America is God and our economy was destined to rule the world when General George Washington was blessed to conquer the redcoats.

    I digress and the object today is a quick history lesson.  To the left of American proper, we see Manifest Destiny also claims Hawaii on this map.  Hawaii used to belong to island Indians so primative they let a  weakvwoman be their ruler.  We eventually found out the Japanese were doing evil things to these island people and put some troops there, scaring the Japs away.  That frustrated the little yellow stinger bees so much they flew all the way back over here from their island hive and stingeded us on a day of infamy.

    Well, we stung back and they found out America’s stinger packs a nucler punch.  Little vermin.

    Long story short, the Hawaiins were so grateful they begged their queen Lilly Kolani to let America be their ruler and they wanted to be a state.  And so it was.

    While we were helping teach the Hawaains to be real proper people and to not be primitive with their thigh hip juggling and hula ring rituals, the Russians schemed to invade us from the north.  The Russians know the Canadians have no backbone and would not report to us a Russian sneaks attack from the North.  God came to warn us in 1959, to make Alaska a state.  We did and it sent a message to the Russians,who were plotting to sneak over to the then territory and strike us with stolen nuclear technology.

    Did you know over 90% of Canadians live within 250 miles of the Canadian border?  We tried to help Canada join America in 1812, but several Candian Generals betrayed America by giving the British military secrets and helping them burn down the White House.  To this day, Canadians fail to thrive and are a poor country of savage folks, all wanting to be in America.  Too bad we cannot trust them and their natinoal language is French.

    Across the ocean to the East, we see all of our cowering ‘allies’.  The very people we freed from Hitler did not come to Bush’s command every time he ordered.  They did not send enough military and money to America during the War on Terror and even worst, they formed the EU to destabilize the dollar.

    We also see terror countries and the Africas, which is a great place to get zoo animals and go for safari since we cannot use them as free workers anymore. 

    The Australians have been good for…The Crocodile Hunter, who is now dead.  They also give us unique animals to show God’s sense of humor.  Then of course, communists, the greatest threat to America right now.

    So that’s a pretty accurate description of the world.  The poles are cold.  Why get into detail when that is all we really need to know, liberalos?

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    About The Author
    Abe If you don't like what you just read here you can just get out of my country. Now how about that smart-alack. Follow me on twitters. Poke me as your New Friend on Facebook!!

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