• New Zealand Unleashes Gay Penguins

    October 20, 2011 9:35 pm 7 comments

    New Zealand is a terrible place, land of Harry Potter and JKK Rowling’s Lord of the Rings vampire movies. It was founded by criminals and now serves as Australia’s version of Gitmo. New Zealand has wisely kept gay marriage illegal; however it unfortunately does allow surgical gender reassignment victims to marry.

    Now in an effort to spread the choice of homosexuality to impressionable youngsters, the New Zealand gays have unleashed a new and dangerous weapon.

    So Skeinz, a knitting shop in Napier, New Zealand, put out a call for knitters to make little sweaters for penguins. Knitters around the world responded. They even have instructions on how to make your own gay penguin sweater.

    Penguin Jumper in 8ply – Must be 100% Wool Yarn
    1 pair 3.25mm , 1 pair of 3.75mm needles , 1 set of 3.25mm dpn’s or circular
    Cast on 36 stitches using 3.25 needles.K1, P1 to end of row. Repeat this row 7 times. Change to 3.75mm needles and K2, P2 rib. Work 4 rows increasing at each end of every row. (44 sts)
    Continue until work measures 15 cms.
    Decrease 1 st at each end of every row until 28 sts remain.
    Decrease 1 st. in middle of next row (27 sts.)
    Leave on needle.
    Make second side the same.
    Transfer the 54 sts from both pieces to 3 of the set of 4 3.25mm needles.(18 sts on each.) and work a round neck in K1 P1 rib for 10 rows.
    Cast off.
    Stitch up sides to decreasing to 27sts (opening for flipper). Add elastic to the top and bottom to prevent the penguins getting out of them. Top: 15cm of elastic; bottom 17 cm (knots allowed). Flat elastic OK.

    New Zealand Is situated dangerously close to China. It will be a vital link in the future as our military seeks to punish the Chinese for their sins.


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    About The Author
    Senator August Weisz Retired Hydroelectric Engineer. Now spend my time helping others who won’t help themselves. http://christwire.org/august-weisz-biography MA

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