• Scandalous! My Little Pony wants to turn your Men into women!

    October 28, 2011 11:01 am 313 comments

    My Little Pony is a hideous monster that wants to transform your Sons into transsexual “women”. My Little Pony is a television show about rainbow horses. These horses are rainbow because that is the color of the homogay agenda. Four of the main horses are transsexual Males and the big communist totalitarian white stallion has to deal with accepting her transsexual Male “sister”.

    Twilight Sprinkle is the leader of the transsexuals and their two fangirls. Twilight is mean and rude and obnoxious and atheist and introverted and is my least favorite character. Twilight is purple because that is the color of feminine Men and he is a feminine Man who things he is a woman. Twilight is named Twilight because he has bad taste in books, and his surname is Sprinkle because he sprinkles his evil transsexuality throughout the land. Twilight Sprinkle is the Frank-n-Furter of My Little Pony.

    Spike is Twilight’s homosexual lover.

    Apple Jack is My Little Pony’s tribute to Brokeback Mountain. Apple Jack is a cowboy transsexual who farms apples and is a salesman. Apple Jack has many Brothers and sisters who are also apple farmers and salesmen, but Apple Jack is the only transsexual. But his Family is a Good tight-knit Christian farm Family, with the only flaw being that they accept Apple Jack’s transsexuality. Apple Jack would be a respectable, True American if he were not a transsexual, but we can’t always get what we want.

    Pinkie Pi is one of two real women horses. Pinkie Pi is one of my favorite horses because she understands her true sexual identity. Pinkie Pi is pink and bakes cupcakes, representing that she understands her place in life. Pinkie Pi would be my favorite except that she is too loud, and a women should be seen and not heard.

    Rainbow Dash is very scary. He is a very athletic Male horse who thinks he is a woman, except that he is very Masculine. He is called Rainbow Dash because when he sodomizes you he ejects the rainbow homogay agenda with each breath, pressuring you to join his illegitemate lifestyle. He is one of the most frightening horses because of his physical power and evil psychologically traumatizing hypnotism. Rainbow Dash is a predator.

    Rarity is the only transsexual horse who could remotely seem like a woman. He is a very effeminate horse and acts like a traditional woman, except for his Male identity. He has a low, lisping, effeminate voice that frankly scares me to death. Rarity wears lots of makeup and he is a drag queen.
    Rarity is like the homogay character Kurt on the sodomizing show GLEE. Beware.

    Fluttershy is my favorite horse. She is actually a woman and is very traditionally feminine. She is quiet and submissive and does not act like a Man. Fluttershy is the perfect woman and I would want to marry her. Fluttershy is Jesus in disguise.

    Stop your children from watching this show! It is sinful and the creators are PURE EVIL. I suggest watching the only wholesome children’s show on television nowadays: VEGGIE TALES!!!

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    About The Author
    Christopher Christenson Republican, American, Christian, Man, Carnivore, White, Hero, Genius, Brave. All words that adequately describe Christopher Christenson. At the ripe young age of 28, Christopher has been writing for Christwire for quite a while, when he isn't warding off the North Koreans from attacking or mentoring youth at his church. Because of his young age, he is able to connect with the young people whilst still charming our beloved elderly. Christopher is fascinated by the grotesque trends among youth and will stop at nothing to investigate. You can contact him on his website.

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