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    51 Christian Friendly Words for Vagina

    November 4, 2011 7:41 pm 73 comments
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    Author:

    Tyson Bowers III
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    We have noticed a lot of vulgar usage of the word “vagina” on our site and social websites and would ask if you could please use one of the following Christian friendly words below instead.

    1. Puff Pillow
    2. Fish Cave
    3. Baby Door
    4. Eve’s Tunnel
    5. Satan’s Doorbell (Clitoral muscle)
    6. Reverse Blowhole
    7. Skin Wand Scarf
    8. Egg Crate
    9. Bullet Wound
    10. Sin Flower
    11. Moist Camel Hump
    12. Harpy Nest
    13. Canker Blossom
    14. Silk Barnacle
    15.  Flap Dragon
    16. Clapper Claw
    17. Birth Cavern
    18. Flesh Wrap
    19. DNA Catcher
    20. Frothy Creek
    21. Satan’s Trap
    22. Sin Muscle
    23. Folded Flesh Leaf
    24. Harpoon Target
    25. Slurpin’ Salmon
    26. Devil’s Fun Slide
    27. Ovary Hallway
    28. Whispering Eye
    29. Secret Fish Forest
    30. Cat in The Hat
    31. Sin Sliver
    32. Devil Sponge
    33. Baby Portal
    34. Warm Potato
    35. Snake Trap
    36. Blood Sewer
    37. Twaddle Dandy
    38. Magic Crepe
    39. Satan’s Rose Bud
    40. Clack-dish
    41. Neighbor of Anus
    42. Pink Jello Box
    43. Rank Weasel
    44. Stripped Monkey
    45. Front Business
    46. Man’s Gift
    47. Wizard Sleeve
    48. The Liquid Slip
    49. Fleshy Fault Line
    50. Pink Velveeta Shell
    51. The Pubic Pub

    Please add your own in the comments below

    Also view:
    51 Christian Friendly Words for vagina
    51 Christian Friendly Words for penis
    51 Christian Friendly Words for sexual intercourse
    51 Christian Friendly Words for Homosexuals
    51 Christian Friendly Words for Anal Sex
    51 Christian Friendly Words for Breasts
    51 Christian Friendly Words for Male Masturbation
    51 Christian Friendly Words for Butthole
    51 Christian Friendly Words for Female Masturbation

    You can also watch Bryan Blake’s “Christian Phrases with Bryan Blake”:

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    About The Author
    "Science is man's poor attempt at understanding God." - Tyson Bowers III Become my Facebooked buddy Founder of CAFA (Christians Against Female Adultery)

    Facebook Conversations

    73 Comments

    • Glaringly Obvious Man
      November 4, 2011
      7:47 pm


      Amazing. Some of these are soooo much more disturbing than the unspoken word itself, but damn it. If it’s for Jesus, I’m in!

      Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 69 Thumb down 8

    • August Weisz August Weisz
      November 4, 2011
      7:54 pm


      Tuna sack is what we use in our family.

      Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 15 Thumb down 29

    • Adam Nelson
      November 4, 2011
      8:35 pm


      Satan’s Vicegrip is one for fat women who try to get you to spit up into them.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 14 Thumb down 9

    • Adam Nelson
      November 4, 2011
      9:14 pm


      Queefing Canyon.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 19 Thumb down 6

    • Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vag
      November 4, 2011
      9:18 pm


      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina
      Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina Vagina

      Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 190 Thumb down 7

    • bob
      November 4, 2011
      9:22 pm


      It just shows how much of a closeted gay you are boners that you can’t say vagina.

      Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 64 Thumb down 3

    • david sugrue
      November 4, 2011
      10:01 pm


      hippo’s yawn

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 15 Thumb down 1

    • Lord Mav
      November 4, 2011
      10:26 pm


      Suck it up ppl your living in modern times now not 2000 years ago.
      i prefer the word PUSSY!!!!

      Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 76 Thumb down 8

      • Albert Toppers Albert Toppers
        November 4, 2011
        11:07 pm


        Moderators – please remove this filth! And ban the perpetrator!

        Well, God Bless You!

        Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 14 Thumb down 107

        • fuck off
          November 5, 2011
          1:36 am


          yeah remove this pedo clown billings from the site

          Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 85 Thumb down 2

        • L.N
          November 5, 2011
          3:21 am


          Clownboy wants to remove the freedom of speech from the people, how shocking.

          Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 55 Thumb down 0

          • Businessman Hank Businessman Hank
            November 5, 2011
            12:39 pm


            Oh, come off it L.N. Everybody knows you’re Claire, and that both of you are actually hardcore Christians.

            Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 16

            • Nellie- BVB Soldier Nellie- BVB Soldier
              November 6, 2011
              10:18 am


              No, I can tell that Claire and L.N are different people.

              Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 12 Thumb down 1

            • Claire
              November 6, 2011
              1:46 pm


              Dude, me and L.N are NOT the same person! I like L.N and I respect him, but we are not the same!

              Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 10 Thumb down 4

        • Kawaii kunt.
          November 10, 2011
          4:32 pm


          I made some super kawaii emotes.

          ( {} ) Standard vagina.

          ({}) Skinny vagina.

          ( {} ) Fat vagina.

          ( {{}} ) Many lipped vagina.

          ( | ) Virgin vagina.

          (=^ {} ^=) Vagina is a cat. Meow.

          ( )*( ) An ass, the gay vagina.

          (づ｡{}｡)づ Vagina wonders if it is kawaii.

          ( {} )ﾉ\( {} ) Vagina highfive.

          (ﾉ {} )ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Vagina blowing kawaii queefs.

          (┛{} )┛彡┻━┻ Vagina flipping a table.

          ( {} )ﾉ やぁ~！Vagina says “Hi~!”

          ♪Happy(ﾉ {} )ﾉ┌iiii┐ヾ( {} ヾ)Birthday♪ Vaginas celebrate a brithday.

          ◢▆▅▄▃崩╰( {} )╯潰▃▄▅▇◣ Earthbending vagina.

          Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 105 Thumb down 1

        • Steph Bones
          November 17, 2011
          5:24 pm


          u mad bro? >:P

          Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 7 Thumb down 1

      • Lord Mav
        November 7, 2011
        3:29 am


        Interesting. alot of things are interesting about the reaction to my first posting.

        Im glad you all are pro freedom of speech.

        Just so you all know, i believe in god, however i do not believe in censorship in any way shape or form. Since censorship is a man made idea that does not come from the lord himself, then i refuse to abide by such rules. He gave us mouths, ears eyes and everything we have so we can use them after all.

        in the end it all comes down to our personal preferences and that is all ok because he also gave us freedom of choice :3

        Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 19 Thumb down 3

    • Militant Negro Militant Negro
      November 4, 2011
      11:17 pm


      Man I met this white girl with the tightest Secret Fish Forest I had ever seen the other day. I took her back to my place and tore that Birth Cavern up! When I was done she wanted me to eat her Rank Weasel. Thats when I kicked that nasty Twaddle Dandy out!

      Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 72 Thumb down 12

    • Jess
      November 5, 2011
      1:23 am


      No disrespect for my theist friends, seriously. I don’t want to agitate anyone over their beliefs.

      That said, I personally believe we shouldn’t be afraid or feel sinful from the use of words, be they words of science or sexuality.

      There is nothing scary or irredeemable about the word vagina.

      Out of respect and admiration for the teachings of Jesus, the devotion and purpose of his children and the sense of all mature humanity I’d like to ask my fellow man to join a conversation more centered on why we create such fetishism out of reality.

      Really, as fathers, mothers, brothers and sisters, I understand the need to shelter children from vulgarity but certainly you can get why this should be left at the kid’s table.

      I speak not from arrogance (I hope) but from camaraderie.

      Let’s bury the hatchet (;)) and not let semantics gum up the works.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 26 Thumb down 2

      • Bruce Myron Danus Bruce Danus
        November 5, 2011
        2:26 am


        “Let’s bury the hatchet (;)) and not let semantics gum up the works.”

        Why do you need to bring up hating Jewish people? Very rude. I dislike you Anti-Semitics.

        Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 19

        • L.N
          November 5, 2011
          3:21 am


          Semantics you fucking moron, not Semitics. Two vastly different things, and you’re one to talk about hating Jewish people.

          Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 28 Thumb down 3

      • Mandy
        November 7, 2011
        5:26 am


        I agree, God has blessed us with a human body yet we are ashamed of it? It is what it is, a vagina is a vagina and a penis is a penis. Using different words like these disassociate children from reality. I see alot of teenage christians getting pregnant and my only conclusion is they have been shelter far too much for far too long.

        Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 18 Thumb down 1

    • the atheist one The atheist one
      November 5, 2011
      8:37 am


      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

      Then you’ve never touched a:
      Puff Pillow
      Fish Cave
      Baby Door
      Eve’s Tunnel
      Satan’s Doorbell (Clitoral muscle)
      Reverse Blowhole
      Skin Wand Scarf
      Egg Crate
      Bullet Wound
      Sin Flower
      Moist Camel Hump
      Harpy Nest
      Canker Blossom
      Silk Barnacle
      Flap Dragon
      Clapper Claw
      Birth Cavern
      Flesh Wrap
      DNA Catcher
      Frothy Creek
      Satan’s Trap
      Sin Muscle
      Folded Flesh Leaf
      Harpoon Target
      Slurpin’ Salmon
      Devil’s Fun Slide
      Ovary Hallway
      Whispering Eye
      Secret Fish Forest
      Cat in The Hat
      Sin Sliver
      Devil Sponge
      Baby Portal
      Warm Potato
      Snake Trap
      Blood Sewer
      Twaddle Dandy
      Magic Crepe
      Satan’s Rose Bud
      Clack-dish
      Neighbor of Anus
      Pink Jello Box
      Rank Weasel
      Stripped Monkey
      Front Business
      Man’s Gift
      Wizard Sleeve
      The Liquid Slip
      Fleshy Fault Line
      Pink Velveeta Shell
      ORRRRRR The Pubic Pub

      Suck on that

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 14 Thumb down 2

    • amarady
      November 5, 2011
      10:19 am


      Is frothy creek a term to refrence a vagina with a yeast infection?

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 15 Thumb down 1

    • Oklahoma
      November 5, 2011
      7:04 pm


      VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA

      since when is the anatomically correct name for something bad? and the slang, PUSSY is admittedly a little crude, but seriously. Men have a PENIS. Women have VAGINA. Men insert PENIS into VAGINA, sometimes a baby pops out. Unfortunately, your dad put his PENIS in your mothers VAGINA and then you were born.

      Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 65 Thumb down 2

    • Flank
      November 5, 2011
      7:28 pm


      Vulva Vandal.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 1

    • the friendly goth
      November 5, 2011
      7:48 pm


      I think I will stick with pussy…and as a girl I think I have the right to call it what I want

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 22 Thumb down 2

    • Millennium
      November 5, 2011
      8:04 pm


      I prefer pussy or vagina its betetr and sound way betetr than stupdiity yous aid

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 4

      • Acid Grin Acid Grin
        November 6, 2011
        7:10 am


        *Better
        *Stupidity
        *You
        *Said

        Please read a book, preferrably the Bible, since that’s where all useful knowledge comes from. And stop using sinful terms for puff pillows.

        Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 6 Thumb down 41

    • Nellie- BVB Soldier Nellie- BVB Soldier
      November 6, 2011
      10:22 am


      How about you grow up and use the correct word, Vagina?

      Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 33 Thumb down 3

    • DamnPhetamineDubstep
      November 6, 2011
      12:22 pm


      I misread 51 as the public pub…

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 21 Thumb down 1

    • Hammi Wallet
      November 6, 2011
      9:39 pm


      Ham wallet

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 8 Thumb down 1

    • Mel
      November 7, 2011
      3:13 pm


      this is incredibly degrading. i’m pretty sure god is against this sort of thing.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 15 Thumb down 4

    • Rawnoceros
      November 7, 2011
      4:41 pm


      Down here in Australia, we call it the Map of Tassie ie. Map of Tasmania (small v-shaped island to our south). Sometimes lewd youth shout things like “show us your map.”

      Moisty is also a term I have heard used.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 10 Thumb down 0

      • knn
        November 12, 2011
        5:31 am


        Amanda palmer has a song called maps of tasmania u should check it out it fit this whole conversation about vaginas

        Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 0

    • valerie
      November 7, 2011
      7:21 pm


      There isn’t a single one of these that doesn’t make me want to vomit.

      The person who compiled this list clearly hates and fears women.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 24 Thumb down 4

    • Freckles
      November 7, 2011
      8:11 pm


      WAT.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 3

    • Janina
      November 7, 2011
      11:10 pm


      This “God” person supposedly created us, no?
      And he/she supposedly created the word Vagina for the woman parts.

      My question is, how the hell would he/she be “ashamed” of said word, that he/she supposedly created for the part.

      That’s just my point of view, though.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 13 Thumb down 0

    • another one
      November 7, 2011
      11:26 pm


      roast beef sandwich.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 4

    • cara
      November 7, 2011
      11:27 pm


      This is embarrassing for all women, Christian or not. Where’s the list of humiliating, degrading, sexist, derogatory substitutes for the word “penis”?

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 21 Thumb down 2

    • Rose
      November 8, 2011
      2:00 am


      Wow, way to keep up the sexism and body-shaming guys! Let’s just keep having XX-persons keep self-loathing because Christian ideals want us to view ladies as either “Madonnas” or “Eves”; good versus evil. If she is not a virgin goddess, then she is obviously a horrible, god-hating whore!

      And this is why we still cannot have nice things in this day and age.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 16 Thumb down 1

    • Kerrie
      November 8, 2011
      2:33 am


      Just what is wrong with vagina anyway?

      These terms are degrading & humilating. I’d be interested to know where the corresponding list of alternative terms for penis is.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 7 Thumb down 0

    • Nova
      November 8, 2011
      4:32 am


      Honestly, why are we living like this?
      “Christian Friendly” words for something
      that is a very key part of why every
      Christian is here on this earth. There
      is nothing sinful about the human body
      except for when some people choose to
      abuse it. (be it lust, or ext.)

      I dont believe in being afraid of words.

      It is called a vagina. And a man has a penis.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 8 Thumb down 0

    • Andy M
      November 10, 2011
      11:10 pm


      beef Curtains

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 3

    • jeffdamal
      November 11, 2011
      12:36 pm


      I prefer the term “wizard sleeves”

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 1

    • wat
      November 15, 2011
      2:40 pm


      these words are much more insulting than cunt

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 7 Thumb down 1

    • jesuslovedwarmpotatoes
      November 17, 2011
      4:22 pm


      The tapping caused Jenny’s clitoris to become swollen forcing the hood of her labia to roll back and Alice fingertip touched the throbbing button and so delicately it had Jenny gasping for breath. Jenny hadn’t felt this way in years and as excitement grew more intense Alice pressure and speed became more demanding, it was hard to say if it was Alice efforts or Jenny’s response that was the cause of effect but when Jenny went into a climax Alice placed her mouth over Jenny’s hot puff pillow and sucked her juices from her.

      Alice then moved around on the bed until she was kneeling at right angles to Jenny’s body, she did that so that she could use her hands and mouth on Jenny’s body like she was playing a musical instrument. The things she did to Jenny’s flesh had her so stimulated she felt like ants were walking all over her flesh, when Alice again placed her head between her legs and kissed her baby portal she whimpered.

      Jenny used her right hand to feel the soft inner thigh of Alice right leg, the hand slowly worked its way up her thigh until her fingertips found the first whisps of pubic hair. They were moist and Jenny could not resist running her fingers through the tangled mat, then she withdrew her hand and brought her fingers under her nose so she could smell the odour of Alice egg crate, “Oh God,” she thought, “am I really doing this? Am I really going to suck this woman’s blood sewer…

      Alice was too lost in Jenny’s bullet wound to even notice what Jenny was doing, even if she had seen her smelling her moist fingers she would not have cared. She sought out the soft folds of the flap dragon with her tongue, relished the taste of the honey Jenny was making for her. Jenny felt the hand return to her own birth cavern and a finger probe between her swollen lips and was only mildly surprised when she felt another finger toying with her anus, she felt her muscles relax and the finger invade her brownhole, the hand fucked both holes at the same time and the thumb would bump into the clitoris and she felt herself approaching a climax.

      She stopped sucking on Jenny long enough to move her body so that she could straddle Jenny’s head and place her flesh wrap right over Jenny’s face. Even an inexperienced woman like Jenny knew what was expected of her. She opened her mouth in an act of acceptance and licked the wet and hairless opening. She felt a chill run through her body as her tongue invaded this dark and private place; she found it thrilling to be having oral sex with a woman she barely knew. Jenny threw herself into the act of cunnilingus on her new lover; she eagerly sucked and swallowed the secretions that flowed from within this woman knowing full well that Alice was doing the same to her.

      After they had both sucked and licked the other to a satisfying climax they cuddled next to each other and discussed the enjoyment they had given one another until they became aware that the rain had stopped.

      Praise or Condemn: Thumb up 12 Thumb down 0

    • abstractreality
      November 18, 2011
      3:36 pm


      This was funny. But I feel that everything on that list is way more vulgar than the word vagina. “Vagina” is a technical term. A medical term. That is how I will teach my children. Not with silly “hoo hahs” and “fuzzies”. There is no need to censor a word that is technical, not vulgar. I am shocked to see this post on a “conservative” Christian website. Aren’t these degrading terms against your morals as Christians? To label a critical piece of the human population full of wonderful and divine creatures “sin”? You should be ashamed of yourself. And by the way… pussy. That is all.

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      • Rebel~BVBArmyBridesmate~SGTC~MCRmy RebelAshRunner
        December 23, 2011
        10:05 pm


        AMEN! I will be teeaching my children that they have Penises and Vaginas, not “ding-dongs” and “donuts”. I mean, God gave us the names for these body parts. By being ashamed, afraid, and horrified by these names, you are basically saying you feel this way about the creator of the term, God, as well. You all should be ashamed if you can’t just say vagina and penis.
        On a final note, vagina and penis. That’s the name. It’s not shameful. Don’t act like it is.

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    • Violet
      November 24, 2011
      4:35 am


      Oh shit, mammal body parts just got vulgar.

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    • Scroty McBoogerballs
      December 3, 2011
      3:08 am


      We use Cum Dumpster in our family.

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    • TheRippersDaughter TheRippersDaughter
      December 26, 2011
      4:23 pm


      Well isn`t this unbecumming. ;)

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