A new website called Death Clock , is boasting to be able to tell you your exact date of death by entering in some basic personal information. I find this to be a site for pure entertainment, as it only asks you your date of birth, sex, BMI and if you are a smoker and magically it will calculate your final day of life. The site does boast its magically abilities right on the homepage:
Welcome to the Death Clock(TM), the Internet’s friendly reminder that life is slipping away… second by second. Like the hourglass of the Net, the Death Clock will remind you just how short life is.
It also gives you a heads up about the dangers of being an overweight fat slob:
The Lethal Danger of Being Fat
Excess weight has a dramatic impact on one’s health. The BMI (body mass index) is a way to measure your disease risk based on your height to weight ratio. People with a BMI of 25 to 29 are considered overweight and those with a BMI of 30 or more are considered obese.
Now, I have a big issue with this, as these four questions are obviously not enough to even calculate a ballpark date for one’s death. We all know there are many more factors in determining one’s date with the Grim Reaper, so I made a list below in hopes that Death Clock will add them to their list of questions.
- Sexual Preference (minus 20 years if gay)
- Race (Minus 10 years if dark skinned. The darker you are, the more time it takes off)
- Marital Status (Divorced or “Its Complicated” gets 5 years removed)
- Religion (Anything besides a religion that follows Jesus, minus Mormons, get 20 years taken off)
- Political Affiliation (Minus 15 years if any left leaning party and add 8 years if any right leaning party selection.)