Juliet Simms (Automatic Loveletter) The Emosexual Movements Chief Fag Hag
Juliet Simms (Automatic Loveletter) The Emosexual Movements Chief Fag Hag
- Chuck D. Finley
Yesterday our beloved sister in christ, Susan B. Xenu wrote an enlightening expose on Andy sixxx Beersack coming out of the sodomy closet with a new boy toy Matt. Countless emosexuals funneled into our holy site, messing up our meager bandwidth, and tagging our comment walls with their obscene messages of hate and cyber bulling, like it were a bridge overpass in a mexican nieghborhood. Many of their hate filled bullying rants involved a woman named Juliet Simms.
Being that none of the christwire staff are godless emos, we had to do some quick Binging and Wikipediaing. After 12 tireless hours of research this is what I have found out about her.
She is a talentless whiny loser like the rest of you emos.
She is from Colorado and a family of musicians. I am sure that it was quite a disapointment to her grand father, aunt, and brother, that she gave up on music and decided to embark on a career of screaming and whining for death faced teen girls. For years she played dive bars and the rare Bat Mitzva party when she was lucky. Finally she got a record deal (probably after sleeping around with countless record execs) but even then the music, if you can call it that, was so bad the record company held off on selling it. She infact had to make illegal copies of her own album and sell. That is pretty pathetic.
Still to this day no one has ever heard of her band Automatic Loveletter. But what she is famous for is being Andy Berbersacks “girlfriend“. Here is a picture of them toghether.
Look at his distant uninterested look…
Now, for comparison sake here is a picture of him with his gay lover Matt Good.
Notice how Briarsack has mounted him from behind to engage in dry gay humping!
So why would a woman put herself in a position to be used by a gay man? Good question. Gays are a virus, a cancer, an abomination. They crave being normal and will use people to look normal. Normal for a man is liking women, not craving another mans rear entry to your waste cannal. Also she is signed on to the record company and is selling no records. Who would buy them? So they have to put her to work doing the only thing she can, pretending to be a gays girlfriend.
But just because she is a talentless ugly girl with no body doesn’t mean she doesn’t have feelings.
Here is one of her songs it is called “HUSH” it is about her being legally required by the record company to pretend to be in a loveless relationship with a man that really craves man meat between his buttock cheeks.
As you can see in that video she doesn’t even look like a woman. She looks more like a young man. She has manly facial features and no breasts. Real men (unlike Biebersack) like big breasts. I know I love my wifes big sweater puppets. I think this is why Biresack likes her so much.
In this song called “Make Up Smeared Eyes” she crys about being in a relationship with Andy(gay)Sexx Bicksack, where he never had interest in her and dumped her for a man. Like any crying emo, her over abundance of eye shadow smears into her ever moist crying eyes.
So that is who Juliet Simms is. Just a girl (I think), working off a record company contract, pretending to be a butt pounding gay man’s night time joy. But clearly NOT.
Thank You
For reading my article. You may also enjoy my following articles:
The My Little Pony Abomination: What Is a Bronie and Why They Make God Cry
Burning Man: A Communist Hippie Sodomy fest or “Rites of Passage”
You can also catch me every Sunday and Wednesday at my Church in Roswell Georgia. God Bless!
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Chuck D. Finley
Brother Chuck is the Minister of The First Tyranical Church of Jesus in Roswell Ga. He is also a proud husband and father.
3:09 am
These Emosexuals are true terrors of the good Godly folk. I stand with my friend and mentor Susan Xenu in her brave battle with these evil doers!
Hot debate. What do you think?
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3:13 am
Damn Chuck D that white girl needs to grow some mammaries!
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4:06 pm
REALLY? You and Christwire are a disgrace to sane people and GOD. Are you really going to attack Juliet because of a web of lies that YOU and SUSAN started? Andy Loves her! Juliet is amazing! More than I can say for you, fucker.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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5:40 am
what lies!
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11:21 am
lets see how many things I can come up with that are lies.
1.) She is from clearwater FL NOT Colorado.
2.)”Hush” is about a relationship that used to be perfect, but turned into something bad and the love died. http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3530822107858634612/ just read the lyrics and you would know that if you had a brain.
3.)The song makeup smeared eyes is a very old Juliet Simms song and was written and recorded long before she even met andy.
Now this isn’t fact but only opinion but I believe Juliet Simms is very beautiful, and talented. She has sold thousands of albums and toured all over the country always having a big turnout at her shows.
She is not being used for anything, and she also isn’t known for being andy biersacks girlfriend, she is known for her talent. I was a fan of hers long before I even heard of Andy so that also proves that point wrong.
So basically, i’ve proved the majority of your points wrong, therefore it will make people believe that the majority of what you are saying are false statements.
You officially, suck.
But thanks for drawing more attention to Juliet Simms!
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8:30 am
She and Andy are cute together, and nothing you say will do anything to their relationship. So STUFU!
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5:41 am
cry emo cry
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5:51 pm
“Hush” and “Make Up Smeared Eyes” are old songs. And i`m almost positive both songs are from before Juliet and Andy even met! Some guys like big boobs, some guys don`t. So what?! It honestly doesn`t matter if a girl has small or big boobs. Some guys like both!
Andy has a tattoo for Juliet above his heart
Andy and Juliet have their names for each other tattooed
Oh, and just because you give someone a piggyback ride, doesn`t mean you are gay.
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10:00 am
If her band has never made any alnums, then why can I walk over to my CD rack and find 4 of their albums and an EP? Juliet and Andy are dating. They are an adorable couple. Here is a picture of one pf his tweets along with the picture that came with it.
“Dragonfly” is what Andy calls Juliet. “Whiterabbit” is what Juliet calls him.
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7:54 pm
who cares?
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10:37 pm
Well, you do because you wrote articles of this band and their orientation. Really? You don’t care about the truth?
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3:04 am
Most “Christians” don’t care about the truth.
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5:42 am
twitting about a firefly in one thing, posting a video describing your love for another man is something different entirely!
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8:46 pm
They were joking! He loves Juliet and it’s sweet that he calls her “dragonfly”. He even has it tattooed on his hand! Fuckin judgmental Christians….
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1:29 pm
In the Emosexual underground ‘Dragonfly’ is code for a beard.
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12:27 am
Obviously you do brcause you left a comment.
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10:35 am
Fuck you Christwire! Firstly get the fucking name right, it’s BIERSACK. Secondly, how dare you call Juliet those names. Load of people know of Automatic Loveletter and the played at Warped Tour for fucks sake.
Those songs were made BEFORE her and Andy were together. You’re taking everything out of context. They have tattoos of each other’s nicknames on their hands, I very much doubt that a ‘fake couple’ would have that done. It’s there forever.
And Juliet isn’t ugly, she’s one of the prettiest female people in music ever, or just ever.
And when can you get it through your small, idiotic, racist brain that Andy isn’t gay, nor will he ever be.
Also, don’t you know that anybody can go on to Wikipedia and edit information and it is very wrong. Majority of Wikipedia is all rumours and even teachers and other people that base work on research say that!
This website can go fuck itself because all of you old bastards need to learn to have some god damn respect! For Christians, you seem like right assholes and are making all Christians look bad.
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7:57 pm
they are both tattooed freaks, what is one more tattoo?
I have to agree with Chuck here she is not attractive. Only a tattooed, over make uped emo could find her attractive.
He said that he is gay. I am more inclined to believe him then some foolish 12 year old that has never met him.
Respect? You use that language and speak of respect for you or anyone else?
Hot debate. What do you think?
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9:25 pm
i have heard him in person say he is not gay… so i think i would believe him over some old lady who is destroying the chance that some people might become christian…
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5:44 am
HE JUST SAID HE WAS GAY IN THE VIDEO YOU IDIOT!
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5:11 pm
Oh really? Link please!
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6:15 pm
The video is in this article
http://christwire.org/2011/11/newsflash-notorious-emosexual-rocker-andy-beersack-now-a-confirmed-homosexual/
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7:20 am
What’s wrong with tattoos…. Nothing at all.
And a) I’m not twelve, and b)I’m not as you so put it ‘Emo’.
I admit I’ve never met them, but to put it straight, you haven’t either. Or at least it seems like you haven’t because you’re making up false accusations about them. You see fan videos and they seem like the nicest of people, and reporters have even said so.
Also, each tattoo has a reason for having it. And I highly doubt that anyone would get a tattoo just because they’re covering up a fake relationship, and trying to make it seem real.
And yes, respect, you are belittling people because of their taste in stuff, and you expect to respect and agree with your opinion. But you’re wrong. Totally wrong.
I don’t see my language as ‘bad’ when I personally feel like I’m using it in the right way. To tell you and the other people that post on Christwire that you’re idiotic and seem to be racist, and dislike people because of their sexuality. Majority of the site’s posts bash people for liking rock music or for being homosexual. You say that if we agree with rock music and rights to gay relationships, that we should go to Hell. But you should go to Hell for being bitchy and ripping on stuff that you don’t know about. You’re never gonna know about rock music unless you actually listen to it. To the lyrics of the songs, the band’s message, and the meaning of their music. And you’re never understand how homosexual people feel when you bash them like you do.
You lot are all about the Lord and you think that you’re doing good, but in the end Karma’s gonna get you and your so called God will smite you!
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8:41 pm
I will see you in hell Susan.
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11:25 am
Juliet is beautiful, along with all her tattoos! I said it once and i’ll say it again, YOU SUCK!
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12:59 pm
Juliet was born Jules, a man with a male genitals.
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4:58 am
Doesnt Bryan Blake have more than one tattoo ? And i thought he was a christian
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10:57 am
Juliet and Andy are not talentless, emo, or anything else you call them. Andy is in NO gay sexual relationship with his BEST FRIEND(in which everyone((or at least YOUNG friends)) acts around. We treat them like family becuae we care about each other)in anyway!
I know you all here on Christwire are far to ignorant and closed-minded to actually understand how everything is now days, and belive just about everyone you don’t like is whore/slut,or gay/lesbian.
No one can make you understand becuase you’re far to stupid.
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12:26 pm
she is not emo, im saying that as not a fan of her or automatic loveletter
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12:58 pm
What tis this Fuckery!?!?!? Juliet is an amazing person and just becuase we commented on how she is dating Andy doesn’t mean you should start talking about her!! Like holy mother fucking shit!! Stop talking about people like they are nothing!! Think about how they would feel if they read this.. The people who judge others for liking something different, looking different, labeling them, just being stuck up snobs and judging for no reason need to get a life and shut up..
I will be a Snakey forever as I know other Juliet Simms and Automati Loveletter fans will be..
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2:59 pm
About her not having boobs, very few skinny chicks have naturally large boobs.
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8:00 pm
you are right she need to eat a good mean or two, then maybe she would look like a woman and not some prepubescent boy
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9:45 pm
Mean of what? What average is she eating?
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5:47 am
what was I writting for once you have a good question. I think I meant to say she needs to eat a sandwich or two.
I think I had an old person moment there!
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8:42 pm
ahw, Susan, are you a bit jealous of Andy? I bet you wish you could be with such a talented beautiful young woman.
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1:00 am
Susan
That Was Hilarious. ” I Think I Had An Old Person Moment There” I mean not the rest but what you said got a few giggles out of me. Lol
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3:34 pm
Dear lame-os of christWire.
Congrats, you did it again.
I actually would like to applaud you for now being the most ignorant and absolutely absurd people of the internet.
Juliet Simms is a gorgeous girl. She has talent that, well I’m afraid to say, you will never have. The same with Andy BIERsack, and Matt Good.
So while you all are writing your complete garbage articles, They are all out doing what they love, and that is making music.
Please go get a life, and stop dissing people, judging them, and labeling them. It only ends up making you look like a total jackass.
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7:09 pm
Their (BVDs) drummer is actually pretty good.
now REPENT!
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8:01 pm
you are a fan of this bvb drummer?
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9:27 pm
Heavens no Sister Susan, he has squandered his God-given talent on salacious emosexual behavior when he should be exalting the almighty by playing in a decent, respectable Christian rock band!
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9:46 pm
The Rev was better.
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10:42 pm
I don’t like to brag, but we won the church talent show 2 years in a row.
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10:44 pm
These emos wish they could be as hip as we were.
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10:51 pm
Yeah, church groups can have some talent, but it’s wasted on the consistently soft music written for praising god. If there were some actual christian hard rock/metal bands, I’d have a much higher opinion of christians.
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10:47 pm
Damn Social Engine software!
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5:49 am
very nice looking young men you were! Now that is a band!
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1:36 pm
So this is that shemale that has sex with that sixx kid?
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5:51 am
please brother use some of Mr. Bowers christian friendly terms for that word!
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6:35 pm
I’m what you would call a “troubled teen,” and even I know that the articles–if you can call them that–you write are hateful and, oftentimes, misinforming. I’m by no means saying all of your articles are this way, but the few I’ve seen are very self-righteous and condemning. I’m having issues with my faith, and I listen to music that would appall you, and I swear, and I do all kinds of un-Christian things. Yet, if the Bible is anything to go by, I know that God still loves me–and he still loves the people you condemn to hell on this site.
Take this verse with a grain of salt:
“If anyone says, ‘I love God,’ yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen.”
1 John 4:20
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6:17 pm
Ok let me be the first to comment with a level head. I am a Christian and please do not let anyone on this sight mislead any of you about what Christians truly believe. We believe that we are to love our enemies and neighbors alike and that GOD is the one who will judge everyone, NOT MAN! Those of you who are telling people they are going to Hell, IT IS NOT YOU WHO WILL JUDGE THOSE IN THE WORLD!!! “What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those INSIDE? GOD will judge those outside. Expel the wicked man from among you.” 1st Corinthians 5:12-13. Stop judging all you who CLAIM to be Christians and step back ad see the plank in you own eye before you see the speck in someone else’s. And Captain Obvious look up the bands “The Devil Wears Prada” “Skillet” “Thousand Foot Krutch” “Decyfer Down” and “Disciple”, their all very good Christian bands (no matter what anyone on this website says) and profess to be Christian.
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3:19 am
Congrats Christwire. You’ve found another target to hit so you have something to do in your pathetic lives. No, I’m not going to curse you out. All though to get my point across, I will use (some) curse words. I’m not religious, am I going to this so called hell? Since I listen to a band that means so much to me (I.e BVB) I’m going to this hell? Since I’m supportive of Andy Biersack’s girlfriend and her music, I’m going to hell. Along with supporting gay rights? Am I correct? I don’t care what you believe in, just don’t shove your beliefs down people’s throats and don’t twist biographies around and make them sound terrible. Ever heard that saying, “don’t believe what you read on the internet, because they’re not always true”? This is a perfect example. If you want to write about an artist/musician, get the facts from them, then fucking write your opinion. It’s not hard. I have to go now, but just to let you know, I’m fine with going to hell, as long as you “perfect”twats won’t be there.
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5:35 am
Ok let me be the first to comment with a level head. I am a Christian and please do not let anyone on this sight mislead any of you about what Christians truly believe. We believe that we are to love our enemies and neighbors alike and that GOD is the one who will judge everyone, NOT MAN! Those of you who are telling people they are going to Hell, IT IS NOT YOU WHO WILL JUDGE THOSE IN THE WORLD!!! “What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those INSIDE? GOD will judge those outside. Expel the wicked man from among you.” 1st Corinthians 5:12-13. Stop judging all you who CLAIM to be Christians and step back ad see the plank in you own eye before you see the speck in someone else’s. And anonymous please dont take you view on Christians from these people, they are NOT true Christians.
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3:58 pm
I don’t judge everyone from one person’s point of view. Thank you though. One of my best friends is Christian and she accepts homosexuals and people who are different. She believes this website is just another sham. I don’t hate Christians and I know not all of them are like these people. I understand people will have their own opinions, and they aren’t going to agree with me. There isn’t a need to go and bash people you don’t agree with on a website and tell them they are going to hell because they aren’t like them. That was all I was saying. I just find this website full of insecure people.
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5:54 am
In case I didn’t say it Brother chuck this is a great and infrmative article! You are a gift to your church.
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8:31 am
truly priceless… again, i find myself hysterically laughing after having read one of your articles. if you are- in fact- an 81 year old woman, you really should start filming yourself read your own articles… i’d pay money to see that! heh-heh
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8:57 am
Sister Susan didn’t write this article Aristotle.
Heaven forbid you get the facts straight before posting a typical hyper emotional, emo-liberal, knee jerk reactionary comment.
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10:35 am
Okay Sister Susan you make me laugh!! your not the cutest old fag, but still! BVB (i know your’e tired of hearing this) but are a decent band. They teach lessons, not christian stuff but lessons. Christwire is nothing but a few people who claim to be “godly” you guys just hate on what makes life beautiful. Goth people add a little fun, gays make awesome friends, and frankly all people are Gods people. You guys write articles and everything about “emosexuals” and not about the beauty in Jesus Christ and why he is great.
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8:42 am
hey susan go burn in fucking hell you saggy titted bitch! BITCH GO BURN IN MOTHERFUCKING HELL WITH YOUR IDIOTIC SON OF A BITCH BASTARD YOU CALL HUSBAND!! HES PROBABLY RAPING LITTLE BOY DOWN THERE RIGHT NOW!!!
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10:08 pm
This is getting too out of hand. Its just plain cruel.
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8:40 pm
Juliet has way more fucking talent than you will ever have. Andy is straight, and if he WAS gay I’d still love him. He gives people like me strength, and as you look up to your “God”, I look to someone who actually exists. Matt is his best friend. Are you saying there is something wrong with being the same gender as your best friend? What the hell is wrong with you. Juliet and Andy are in love. Andy isn’t gay, and Matt is just his friend. Get a fucking life. And by using the word “emo” you are actually going against the bible. It’s a stereotype, and therefore it is judging millions of people who are in no place to be judged by you hypocrites. See you in hell. *Gay Pride*
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4:40 pm
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. God clearly is not perfect, he made you fuck ups. You’re being absolutely cruel to someone with no reason. Juliet is a stunning girl, and you are blind if you can’t see that. And no, I’m not a “homogay”, I can just tell whether a girl is pretty or not. And maybe you should stop being a judgmental asshole, Chuck. You’re really commenting on the size of her breasts? If Andy saw this, he would defend her until the end. And Juliet loves Andy just as much. Andy should beat the shit out of you for this, but he won’t, because even though he loves her, he’s a better person than you guys. And she is the farthest thing from talent-less. She is very talented, and she got a record label for that reason, and that reason only. She’s no slut. And lastly, Matt and Andy are not a couple. They’ve been friends for years and are really close, there’s nothing wrong with that. Best friends act silly sometimes, and joke around about things like that. But they don’t really mean it. If you didn’t have such a thick head you would see that.
You are honestly too stupid for words.
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1:26 am
Dear Christwire, as a christian you embarrass me.
Our religion is about love and you do not exemplify that.
I am a huge fan of Automatic Loveletter, I have met her several times. She has also helped me along with my music career with no gain for her. She is a beautiful soul and is deeply in love with this HETEROSEXUAL man.
I urge you to re-evaluate your beliefs as it seems you know nothing of Christ if you can say such awful hateful things.
I hope you enjoy your sad life, full of hate.
Good luck getting past the gates
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7:00 pm
I love Juliet, but you guys do realize this is all a joke right? They’re making fun of those heavy Christians that think everything is a sin.
this shit is hilarious.
stupid emos getting all butt hurt
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9:36 pm
I’m Ashamed Of Being Human, This Site Being The Reason. I’m Ashamed Of a being A Christian. You Burn Religion Down Into The Ground.
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9:37 pm
Susan, Why Are You On The Computer? Shouldn’t You Be Dead By now? Or Burning In Hell?
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2:02 am
Leave Queen Cobra alone! She is a beautiful lady (so says my Father who goes to Mass every Sunday and countless of other men in my lovely state). Juliet Simms is amazingly talented and her Snakes (me being one) will bite your stupid head off if you say otherwise. As for Andy BIERSACK(learn to spell German names asshat) he is not gay nor is Matt they are best friend, don’t you have a best friend? I do we act stupid and she gives me piggyback rides because we just get bored plus have a best friend is someone to gossip about all the hot guys (girls for some LIKE ANDY AND MATT) with
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8:15 am
if you guys say that Juliet isn’t pretty, i’m pretty sure i never want to know what you would define pretty.
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8:05 am
Does this look Distant and uninterested???
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3:52 am
To susan b. Eyes it probably does , but to everyone else it doesnt .
but then again everyone else doesnt have fucked up old aged vision like her
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1:07 pm
Dear Chuck, you said that you did 12 hours of research so I would love it if you could show your work cited page which I am sure is filled with completely credible sources. Also, next time you write an artical, make sure you spell someone’s name correctly. His name is Andy Biersack. Oh and doesn’t the bible teach you to be accepting of others and not to be judgemental? You sir are the definition of a narcissistic hypocrite.
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11:28 pm
This website is like..I know it’s fake, but it’s an awesome place to go rant at people like you when I’m mad. So I guess I’ll do what I usually do when I post on Christwire. Run through your article and point out mistakes. Because believe me- there’s a lot of them. First of all, let’s set things straight. I’m a Christian. I believe firmly in God, and I obviously know a lot more about Him and the Bible than you do. For example- the Bible clearly states, in Matthew Chapter 7, “Do not judge others, for you too will be judged.” And what are you doing throughout this whole article? Judging others, specifically Juliet Simms, Andy Biersack, what you call to be “emos” and at one point even Mexicans. God will hold you accountable for this. Second thing: you’re constantly talking about Juliet’s body…and how she’s “got no breasts.” You’re married, are you not? You were, after all, mentioning how you love your wife’s “big sweater puppets.” (By the way, I think this comment made me throw up a bit in my mouth..) So since you have a wife, please explain to us why you’re looking at Juliet Simms’ breasts, because I’m sure I’m not the only one curious about this. Face the fact, Mr. Finley. You don’t know God. Please don’t act like you do. Same goes for you, Susan B. Xenu. I’ve read your trash on “emosexuals” before. Left lots of comments too. Please don’t talk about what you don’t know anything about, because it shows exactly what you are- Lost and blindly ignorant. I hope you enjoyed my rant.
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