• Twilight Wedding Gown Now Being Sold as High School Prom Dress

    November 27, 2011 5:15 am 2 comments

    If there were anything that should convince parents to not let daughters go to Winter Prom, it would be this story.  Please take heed and remember that prom is a very dangerous ceremony where your daughter can get pregnant.  High school boys are rife with surging testosterone and dream of new ways to plant their illegal seed in your daughter’s secret place.

    The new Twilight wedding gown dress is one that will have boys lapping their tongues, thinking your daughter is Elvira mistress of the dark.  All this dress makes them thing about is lusty neck bites and getting into the dark secret tunnel of your daughter’s innocence.

    The horrific image you see at right is the dress in question.  Notice the fiery red go go boots attack your eyes, leading up to the knees and then the thighs that are not covered at all by the short cut dress of nylon-lyrca blends.  The cape is triangular, like an vampiric Egyptian pyramid and draws the viewer’s gaze into the chest of the dress wearer.  Note that the chest is already gift wrapped in a big red bow tie by Satan.  What a great Christmas gift for the young horny demon who wants to implant your daughter with his bastard seed.

    I’ve warned all parents about the dangers of prom before.  It is a festival of Satan where at least 83% of all high school pregnancy occurs.  Most prostitutes who come from good families loose their morals because of low self-value incurred at prom.  Once they are violated and dumped by the prom date, who promises he is ‘the one’, they will live a lifetime full of easy leg gaps and drug binges.  It is a sliding scale of misery, death and disease.

    Parents, it is of utmost importance for you to remember that Satan’s two favorite foods are innocence and your daughter’s virginity, so please help him starve this winter by not letting some young horndog drag your daughter to prom and so her holy fields with the fruits of unwed blight.

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