• Are atheists Actually satanic Androids, and Thus Is There A Need To Destroy Them?

    December 4, 2011 12:00 am 13 comments

    This is the famous atheist physician, Richard Fineman. Look at him. Look at his doughy skin, his beady eyes and his blank face. Look at his finely coiffed hair. Something isn’t right with this image. Mr. Fineman, best known for doing science that involves incredibly complicated math, doesn’t seem fully Human. As we all know, math was created by the devil as propaganda as a method of luring people into atheism by showing that atheists are “smart” because they can play with numbers. What am I suggesting to you? I am suggesting that Mr. Fineman and his type are indeed, non-human and were created by satan with the intent of destroying earth and more importantly, America, through numbers. I’m onto it.

    This is Michele Bachmann. Now look at the startling difference between Ms. Bachmann and Mr. Fineman. Ms. Bachmann has a Passion in her eyes, a Smile on her mouth. I can Feel the Emotion overflowing from Ms. Bachmann’s face. Her Christianity is evidenced by her Emotions, and Mr. Fineman is left with a void, a void caused by his true roboticism. Now Michele is characterized by her Humanity. Her Humanity, with the influx in these cyborgs, is quickly becoming misunderstood. See, the droids have been trying to eradicate her reputation through the words of satan controlling their every action. This is nefarious and we must restore the True Humanity of Conservatism before it is too late.

    I delved into the details of the differences between the automaton Mr. Fineman and the sentient being Ms. Bachmann in my last paragraph. This brings up a principal. This principal is known as the uncanny valley, and details the differences between a Real Human and the golems that have been rapidly invading the earth. See, the uncanny valley tells you whether something is Human versus a Cylon, Dalek or a Vulcan merely disguised as a Human. The uncanny valley was originally invented by computers but as Intelligent Christian Humans we must use it to the Best of our Abilities to Save the world from these satanic robots.

    As you may or may not already know, the liberal agenda has been promoting heavily artificial Humans. Notable examples include Data (pictured) from Star Trek the Next Generation and Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory. These characters are not actual Humans but atheists with odd mannerisms and sentiments. These droids typically exhibit characteristics of the “Mary Sue” namely not receiving repercussions for their sin. Examples include Edward Scissorfingers who notably engaged in premartial sin-docking with an elderly ginger woman and later killed a Good Moral Boy who is also an Athlete; and the Powerpuff Girls who do bad stuff to Well-Meaning Men of Good Character, making them terrorists essentially. This is wrong because these villains are every day turning Our Impressionable Children into sinful atheists with no Moral Filter.

    So yes. We must stop Pinocchio from becoming a real boy, we must exterminate the Daleks and prove that Spock isn’t that fascinating after all, before the world is destroyed by these satanic terrorists. Remember your Christian Duty, Gentlemen, and let’s slay some androids!

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    About The Author
    Christopher Christenson Republican, American, Christian, Man, Carnivore, White, Hero, Genius, Brave. All words that adequately describe Christopher Christenson. At the ripe young age of 28, Christopher has been writing for Christwire for quite a while, when he isn't warding off the North Koreans from attacking or mentoring youth at his church. Because of his young age, he is able to connect with the young people whilst still charming our beloved elderly. Christopher is fascinated by the grotesque trends among youth and will stop at nothing to investigate. You can contact him on his website.

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