Peace, Long Lines Mark chrisTwire Opening Day Book Sales
Last week, the long-awaited chrisTwire handbook went on sale worldwide. In what was no coincidence last week also was peaceful one a week of celebration in many lands.
The book is a special project From Pastor Jack Gould and Deacon Bowers; it also includes an exclusive forward from Investigative Journalist Stephenson Billings and a dedication that brings tears to the hardest of souls.
We have gathered some of the pictures sent to us from fellowship members worldwide who monitored the event.
Remember, the book is now available at fine retailers everywhere and online. It’s also available as an eBook.
..
.MA
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Author: Senator August Weisz
Retired Hydroelectric Engineer. Now spend my time helping others who won’t help themselves.
http://christwire.org/august-weisz-biography
MA
11:22 pm
Yeah, good job pulling photos off the internet and saying bullshit stuff about them. You’re so cool!
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11:29 pm
No, the book is real. You can bing it yourself http://www.bing.com/shopping?q=christwire+handbook&form=MSNH14&qs=n&sk=
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11:31 pm
I can see you can’t read that well. I said the photos are fake, not the book.
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1:08 am
Photos look real to me. Cracker.
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12:21 pm
Photos may be real but have nothing to do with the site or book. Which is what I think Pebrocks meant.
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11:35 pm
You didn’t post up a photo of the book itself dumbass. Get off the weed, it’s clouding your ability to judge.
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11:38 pm
I had the kids camp out last night to be sure that we got our copy before they all ran out. They were tired, but you should have seen the glow on their faces when they brought this book home from the mall!
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11:40 pm
The only reason anyone would buy this book would be to laugh, because what it says is fucking retarded. Check out people’s thoughts on it on websites such as Amazon. Everyone says it’s funny. Only reason there would be a “glow” on the kids’ faces would be to laugh at it.
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1:10 am
That glow is the glow that only cracker @ss white people have.
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2:17 pm
I put the bible in the humor section when I was at the store. Why would anyone buy such a hateful book? And Pedrocks, of course it’s funny, It’s fake, and so is this site!
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1:52 pm
that’s because you are jealous. I bought the bible and let me tell you, worth the read. there was a guy who got everything stripped from him to prove his loyalty to the man in the sky. I forgot if he got anything back.
the point is that I read it until the end. not bad, it went with a corny “end of the world” ending.
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2:00 pm
Read the bible. Horrible book, no character development, long, boring, H2G2 was better if you’re looking for absurdist humor…
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2:25 pm
H2G2 is awesome. Lost track of the number of times I’ve read the first 5. Not sure how I feel about ever reading the latest one not by Douglas Adams. It is not going to be the same.
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6:09 pm
Actually, a lot of people on amazon say that it’s better than the onion. So yes, they are likely laughing their nonexistent asses off at it.
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11:40 pm
I hope security at those Barny Nobles watch those beersackists emo-punks and keep them from moving the book from the Religion and Inspiration section to the humor section.
They’ll stop at nothing to derail the national surge to the light of Jesus.
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11:41 pm
They belong in the humor section. That’s the only thing the book does: causes laughter.
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12:26 pm
It does cause humour but that’s not the only thing it causes. It causes hate for the people it is mocking. Intentionally or unintentionally the site and the book mock bigoted homophobic xenophobic racist so-called Christians and it does it well.
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6:10 pm
Eh.. I thought it was kind of bland. Candide is much better.
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11:46 pm
I received this email from one “Newt Leroy” that was simply superb. Here’s an excerpt of the best part:
******************
It’s become fashionable among the liberal elite to downplay, deride, even deny America’s greatness. The political correctness police insist that ChristWire is “hated” around the world for being too big, too powerful, too rich, too successful, too loud, too intrusive. And besides, it’s not nice to brag.
Humility is a luxury you cannot afford.
Far too many choose to remain ignorant of the remarkable principles of the fellowship. They feast on chicken pot pie and oreos instead of knowledge which gives sustenance. Faith, Family and Freedom are the three legged supports of the ChristWire fellowship milking stool. From the mighty bovine teats of poverty, oppression, boredom and strong opposition to gaudy homosexual behaviors, true faith and patriotism spewed forth to quench the thirst of the hungering maw. The ChristWire Handbook is instructive guidance on how to properly tug that teat, exceptionally.
Beware, for here lies the truth.
****************
I thought it was inspiring.
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12:45 am
wats inspiring about it its just a piece of crap that spreads lies and basically brain washes ppl in2 thinking every1′s wrong and u assholes r right
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1:12 am
Whats up baby, how old you is?
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1:16 am
14
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1:30 am
You need to check out the Habbo site or something for young teens.
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7:21 pm
We try to go on Habbo, but the pool there is closed!
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2:03 pm
You deleted my comment, fuck all of you.
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3:28 pm
Lol your 14? im 17.
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6:18 pm
I always knew you were a pedophile. You and that clown.
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9:01 pm
You are a SLANDERER!
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3:14 pm
No clownboy you are indeed a pedophile Like billings
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11:46 pm
This is inspiring and humbling to know that we have converted another sinner over to the superior ways of Christwire.
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12:42 am
I’m so glad that this essential guide is experiencing this amount of success! With the guidance of Christwire, all of the world’s problems can be solved!
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1:13 am
dam man, you white.I mean everyone on here is white, butt DAM you white!
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4:33 am
all the world problem being solved extermination of christian Like you that would solve it but we can’t do that can we ?
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12:36 pm
There would still be bigots. But that might be a start to solving the world’s problems. Can’t go about exterminating people though, we’d be no better than the bigoted people on the world we were exterminating.
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7:00 pm
maybe put them on a deserted island with palm tree and coconut
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10:44 am
That could work.
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11:48 pm
If I translated your French correctly, you are insinuating that some kind of Christian genocide would bring about an age of Utopia.
You are sick and you need Jesus.
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2:17 pm
You are sick, and need medication.
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3:16 pm
No I said we could not make a Genocide of christian even if it’s giving you back the emdecine you did to a lot of people in history
but putting you on a desert island with palm tree and coconut where you can’t do any harm to anyone
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2:06 pm
did someone say violence?
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12:33 pm
No book or website has ever or will ever solve the problems of this world. Even books that are meant to act as a guide to leading a decent life. The morals within often become twisted due to a group’s interpretation of the contents and can lead to hate, fear and/or oppress another person due to their nationality, race, gender, sexuality and/or views.
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9:02 pm
You LIE! The Christwire Handbook has the power to HELP the most and depraved and wicked to a decent life!
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10:46 am
You LIE! The Christwire handbook has no such power. The only “powers” it has is to spread hate and mock bigoted views.
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2:18 pm
I’m sure if I introduced it to my lighter it would also have the power to keep me warm for a little while.
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3:22 pm
Tom you raise a good point. Can’t believe I overlooked that power.
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3:29 pm
I tried doing just that, and I think I killed a demon. Probably best NOT to light it on fire, or even be near it’s presence.
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2:17 pm
Let’s have a bookburning!
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3:17 pm
yeah it’s cold in Canada now we can warm ourself
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1:06 am
During my weekly mission work of serving the working poor popcorn on public transportation this week, I began reading the Holy Handbook loudly on the bus. When my ride had completed and I was exiting the bus, the riders on the bus all started clapping and cheering. The book is that powerful and amazing!!!
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1:54 am
their clapping and cheering cuz u left
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2:01 am
I do not think so. The people on my weekly bus ride mission love and respect me, and they really like the free popcorn I give out.
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2:08 am
crack
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3:00 am
Just because you are a Black, just not mean you are required to do the crack. You should quit before you develop health problems like Ebola.
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3:34 pm
Just because you are Christian does not mean that you are required to do the cat shit. You should stop before you cause someone to commit suicide. Did you know that you are a hateful, racist homophobe? No? Then you are already hopelessly high off cat shit.
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12:50 pm
Throwing popcorn at the poor does not count as handing out food.
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1:35 pm
Insulting the soldiers of God does not count as serving justice!
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3:38 pm
Think of it this way: if someone wanted to be Christian, wouldn’t they have converted themselves? Missionaries are annoying and bothersome. They think that bringing children will prevent people from telling them off. How naïve. Some people have too much faith in humanity. And God for that matter…
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12:41 pm
I’d clap too if someone reading that sort of rubbish got off the bus.
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1:07 pm
I wouldn’t. I’d have thrown him off while the bus was moving long before he had the chance to leave the vehicle of his own accord.
Then I’d have got some applause. LOL!
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1:20 pm
You’d probably get more than just applause. You’d make a lot of friends on that bus for throwing him off. Especially if the bus was say moving along a busy road.
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2:01 pm
I suggest the both of you renounce hate as a lifestyle and buy a copy of this book.
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2:15 pm
Well what is it renounce hate or buy the christwire book? Can’t do both, what with the book itself filled with hate-filled articles.
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6:53 pm
You want me to spend my hard earned money on that book of lies? That’s about as likely as Elvis coming to my birthday party.
I’d rather eat the money.
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12:45 pm
Also giving people popcorn on a bus doesn’t count as mission work. You are just giving out popcorn to people who actually are travelling from one place to the next. No one is being helped in anyway.
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1:29 pm
Yes it does. It is his fellowship assignment. He also earns moral points which allow him to use larger research grants for his research articles.
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7:03 pm
moral point to a research granbts research article … man are you high or what ?
anyway You surley have barley any Moral point ( or moral for the matter ) because yoru article suck and are not well researched
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9:05 pm
WOW! That is an amazing testimony of this book’s power, Brother Bruce. If it can move a city bus to Christ, just think what it can do for the world entire! I’m shaking with glee just thinking about it. Pack your bags – Jesus is coming soon! GLORY!
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12:07 am
What a beautiful testimonial brother Danus!
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12:17 pm
Last week was a celebration as it was the end of 2011. You schedule a book release at the end of the year then any celebration probably is and should be taken as pure coincidence. As for the pictures they are nothing to do with your book. Google image search has been great for disproving this site on many occasions
Picture one
A queue for a Thomas Pink shirt give-away ny.racked . com/archives/2009/10/22/lineblogging_thomas_pink_shirt_giveaway_causes_chaos_at_rock_center . php
Picture 2
iPad 2 Queue
bits.blogs.nytimes . com/2011/03/22/with-high-demand-ipad-2-goes-on-sale-in-25-countries/
Picture 3
Not even a queue. Didn’t need google image search to work that out. It is an overcrowded Chinese train station
email-junk
. com/pictures/china-train-station . html
Picture 4
A line of people waiting to vote in Sierra Leone
www . usaid . gov/locations/sub-saharan_africa/countries/sierraleone/
Picture 5
A bit difficult to find this one. But all other posts are dated in 2009 so doubtful that the queue is for the christwire book. Unless they have a time machine travelled to the future to take a photo of a queue.
www . prrockandroll . com/2009/07/what-is-this-line-for . html
Picture 6
Voters in Kashmir
www . thewip . net/contributors/2009/01/democracy_prevails_in_kashmir . html
Picture 7
A queue to see volunteer doctors and dentists in San Ramón
blog.travelpod . com/travel-blog-entries/gypsylifestyle/1/1283002225/tpod . html
Well done on pulling photos of the internet. Most, it turned out, were at least a year old. People queue all the time probably be better off next time finding these queues themselves and taking your own photographs. Easier to claim they are because of something relating to this site that way as they will not be online elsewhere.
(to check the links just remove any spaces, spaces added in an attempt to get around the moderation that this site has if you post multiple links.)
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12:59 pm
Very clever changing the file dates. We see what you did there.
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1:11 pm
Very clever trying to discredit your opposition with lies. We see what you did there.
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3:10 pm
The only one here trying to create opposition is you. We are a welcoming fellowship that embraces differing opinions and lively discussion of topical interest. You seem to be a Jesus Basher.
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3:15 pm
Embraces differing opinions?
Dumb bimbo, as soon as one of us stats our opinion. You and your cult immediately jump us and criticize the hell out of us
You deserve every possible hurtful word because you guys criticize everyone’s lifestystyles at every turn
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1:16 pm
With great ease you’d find out that the sites listed are genuine and actual articles. None have anything to do with me. I have no hacking skills so wouldn’t know where to begin to change the date it said that the photo’s were posted.
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1:44 pm
Have you even read the book yet? You will probaby say “it dosent exist” too.
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1:51 pm
Nope I’d say the book exists there is proof of that
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3:28 pm
Bitch, why are you on the internet and not cooking or cleaning? Your work is never done.
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1:30 pm
Liberal lies. Those links dont even work.
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1:41 pm
They work if you remove the spaces between the fullstops. I said to follow them DELETE the spaces. The spaces were added to avoid waiting hours whilst the comment was moderated.
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1:43 pm
Fullstop? This isn’t the navy.
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1:46 pm
Or this “.”
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1:44 pm
If you can’t be bothered to remove the spaces here are the links:
1. give-away ny.racked.com/archives/2009/10/22/lineblogging_thomas_pink_shirt_giveaway_causes_chaos_at_rock_center.php
(Works big surprise)
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1:54 pm
ny.racked.com/archives/2009/10/22/lineblogging_thomas_pink_shirt_giveaway_causes_chaos_at_rock_center.php Full link not shown first time. Let’s try again
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1:49 pm
bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/03/22/with-high-demand-ipad-2-goes-on-sale-in-25-countries/ Works
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1:52 pm
email-junk.com/pictures/china-train-station.html works
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1:56 pm
And the rest work. As long as the spaces are removed either side of the “.” before the com, php and html.
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1:52 pm
I’m ashamed I haven’t bought a copy already.
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2:43 pm
You should have been ashamed long before that.
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2:50 pm
Claire, I’ve noticed that you’re a spectacularly militant poster on this website. Your posts, filled with a vitriolic animosity that has not and cannot be bested, are simply everywhere. How long have you been wasting your time attacking the poor proponents of the Word? Why do you continue?
I advise you to desist and to put that ferocious ardor to better use, such as spreading the news about this book! I think that’s reasonable; don’t you?
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3:00 pm
Your comment was invalidated once you mentioned the book.
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3:05 pm
Personally, I find your consistent negativity to be a tad disconcerting!
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3:07 pm
Well I’m very happy for you.
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3:08 pm
See, I wish you’d be more positive like that.
You have the potential to be quite the uplifting good samaritan.
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6:12 pm
You don’t even know me, creep.
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9:07 pm
Kristoffer, Claire is a hard nut to crack. And may I emphasize NUT. Dr. Billings has been going back and forth with her for quite some time and she constantly makes a fool of herself. I hope one day she wises up and sees the shocking wisdom right in front of her face. Well, God Bless You!
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11:21 pm
Claire, you’d do well to listen to the man. Your childish tirades against this website aren’t changing anybody’s minds and essentially just bother people.
I have long theorized that your shallow social life outside the internet has led you to seek a stable cyber-community, and the consistent attention you get from screaming at the good people here fulfills that need. You should seek help.
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11:27 pm
Claire speaks the truth, the people of Christwire however do not. We have pointed out many times the lies you guys post. So really, she is changing people’s minds. You people are the ones that bother people.
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11:29 pm
No, you fool. Anyone that agrees with her already did, so they’re not “changing their minds.” Anyone that doesn’t agree with her isn’t going to be swayed by her vitriolic rhetoric and rude behavior. She’s a poor, attention-starved soul.
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11:31 pm
One could be say the same about Susan.
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11:33 pm
True, but Susan intends to speak to an audience that agrees with her in the first place, whereas Claire is contentious by nature.
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2:22 pm
I actually thought about buying this just for laughs…than I remembered that I had just bought $70 worth of books in a series I ACTUALLY wanted this week. Looks like this will just have to wait
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7:07 pm
I don’t have money to spend on this book if ever I buy it I will burn it
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3:33 pm
I bought one, and yes it is legit. but i pissed on it and ripped the pages out, flushed them down the toilet, and burned the cover.
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