• Santorum Uses CUM (Conservatives United Moneybomb) to Grease the Hinges of War Chest

    January 22, 2012 1:44 pm 27 comments

    This story broke late last night with the obstreperous blah nightingale,”AngryBlackLady” who began tweetering the effectiveness of a Santorum moneybomb uniting the Conservative movement. Santorum’s website calls on the faithful to lubricate the squeaky gears of the Santorum political machine. As a outspoken advocate for legislating a three way marriage between one man, one woman and a loving creator that spins the wheel of fate for pro-creative blessings, Santorum speaks for many conservative voters.

    After a third place finish in the South Carolina primary, Santorum is clearly intent on raising a war chest to be used as a dowry for the Vice Presidential bridesmaid position. His concession speech had the clear toll of wedding bells rather than the village alarm to “drown the witch” so many have expected. He clearly wants to betroth a front runner and needs to raise the dowry for a Vice Presidential bid. He might be a smart catch for the Romney or Gingrich campaign.

    Rick Santorum brings the evangelical endorsements from Focus on the Family and other church leaders missing from the Mormon Mitt Romney and Newt Gingrich campaigns. While Gingrich speaks to the common disdain for media elites, his campaign continues to battle his undeniable animal attraction to the ladies. Mitt Romney, on the other hand is struggling with being viewed as out of touch with real Americans and a non-Christian Mormon. Rick Santorum would complement either front runner with his complete unattractiveness to women and folksy, fresh from the farm boyish comparisons of paper towels and napkins.

    Raising funds is a savvy move on the part of Santorum and just might put him in the power bottom position of Vice President under Gingrich or Romney.

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    About The Author
    Blanche Beecham "Blanche Beecham lends a soft, learned hand to the fourth estate with incite-full investigations on diverse topics such as Politics, Love, and Lifestyle. Her many years experience as a wife, mother, ladies book club president and financial auditor make her well suited to ferreting out the truth and giving it a sound shake." - Rev. Jackson Lee Whitebelley, Publisher and Editor of "The Incubator" - Follow me on Twitter! @BLANCHEBEECHAM

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