I Don’t Understand Why Strippers Get Upset When I Tip with Monopoly Money
Now before any of you start in on me, I’m a single man and I enjoy the gifts God gave me to look at. If I were not meant to look at beautiful women, I would not have eyes in my head. So let’s not even start with the whole Christians cannot enjoy the beauty of women nonsense.
I don’t understand why strippers get upset when I tip with Monopoly money. I mean, are those real tits…I didn’t think so.There is a big thing I want to talk about today and it’s just downright, frank talk. Why are strippers of today so uppity? Think about it. Since when is simply removing your clothes to help a few blue-collars unwind after a long day on par with acting uppity like your pamper your bits with the Queen’s tickling powder? You’re a stripper, you shake your bits in a dirty smell bar!
It really makes me upset. And here is my theory. What you see a stripper do, a wife will do. They are all females and the same mental processes power them all. How can my theory be true?
The thing is this: broads are being told that women are better than men. Strippers of today are a microcosm, that means they represent all of women as a whole. I know for a fact that all strippers are uppity and have no sense of respect. It’s what I’m seeing in all women, even the ones who aren’t hookers.
But to test my theory, I did an experiment. Mixed in with my real money I hid some Monopoly money. I waited until a woman with surgeon crafted cannons came out and tried to sell us false services. I paid her accordingly.
I don’t understand why strippers get upset when I tip with Monopoly money. I mean, are those real tits…I didn’t think so.
What happens when you give a woman too much fancy stuff and too much attention. You got a female with a stripper attitude on your hand. Many of you men tonight are bald and tired, you ache and have to go to work tomorrow. Your wife goes out and spends your money like it grows on trees.
She complains and nags, not realizing that being a man is tough work. You know why she acts like she doesn’t have a clue what you need and no care? Because you are raising a stripper by making her think she is on a pedestal, men.
Needless to say, the stripper got upset and yelled at me. She failed to realize the customer is always right and I have a right to be treated with respect. Men, you have a right to be treated with respect. Don’t let your little private stripper – be she girlfriend, wife and mistress – sell you short. If she don’t want to treat you with respect, tell that hoe to pass go, leave the $200 and realize there’s plenty more jugglies out there for you to explore. That’s all I’m saying.
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Mike Collins
You recognize me from my appearances on shows like Maury and Doc Phil. If you don't like what I'm saying back up off right now because I'm here to speak my mind and teach men how to be men again over their women.
12:17 am
I wish I had the cajones to do this.
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12:37 am
It’s so much easier once you have a wife, Mr. Collins. Frequenting those clubs as a youngster was awful for me. It was always, loud, expensive, and the look-but-no-touch policy just makes the whole experience awkward. I wouldn’t pay those women with Monopoly money, much less actual currency.
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1:11 am
When a person has a personal relationship with God, these near occasions of sin are avoided. My suggestion is when the urge to frequent a house of ill repute where whores flaunt their milk sacs and honey mounds for the loose change of drunken horndogs, instead you should go to church and ask Christ for the strength to resist the urge.
Otherwise, it will lead to self rape.
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1:20 am
Well, I guess it is better than Canadian.
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1:25 am
I went to Canada a few times, and they have the nerve there to take my American dollars as an even exchange rate for the Canadian dollar. Ridiculous! If pay $5.00 American for a $5.00 item in Canada, I expect to receive change!
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1:50 am
But don’t they give out those annoying fake pennies with ridges in return? I went up to Vancouver with a nurse who thought I wanted her, so she paid for everything for some reason. They actually said their loonie was worth more than the dollar, which I doubted. There’s just something disturbing about the Canadians as a whole. It’s that same feeling you get in the smaller cities of France, just like they’re all staring and a bit jealous.
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8:28 am
Sorry to burst your greenback, fellows, but the loonie is mightier than the buck these days. As one who straddles the border, I can attest that Canucks are now driving down to Bellingham to tank up on American gasoline that’s doubly discounted because their money is above par, in addition to those low, low American petrol prices. And don’t get me started on the American dollar vs. the Australian ones that I used to get paid when I lived there. It now costs 108 American pennies to buy an Aussie dollar. Just another indication of how far America has fallen. Must have something to do with having a godless Muslim in charge, eh?
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3:05 pm
“I went up to Vancouver with a nurse who thought I wanted her, so she paid for everything for some reason.”
Maybe she actually DIDN’T want you *shock and awe!* and insisted on paying so that she wouldn’t feel “obligated” to “return the favor” later that night.
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3:55 pm
Nah, she insisted and invited me up with her for a ‘romantic trip’. She was trying to tie me down into a relationship and failed to know I had no intent of spending much more than that fun weekend with her before cutting our three week fling off. I don’t understand why some women keep throwing around the “L” word so quickly.
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4:02 pm
Three weeks is forever in the mind of a child or a female.
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5:06 pm
“Three weeks is forever in the mind of a child or a female.”
Then if that’s the case, why did you waste your money sending your daughter to college? Shouldn’t she be ironing her husband’s shirts and changing the baby’s diaper by now?
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5:08 pm
“She was trying to tie me down into a relationship and failed to know I had no intent of spending much more than that fun weekend with her before cutting our three week fling off.”
Yet you yourself have claimed in the past that the only women you fuck are those who are potential marriage candidates. Do you admit you were lying?
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5:42 pm
No, we were dating fine but she had an annoying habit I could not live with for the rest of my life. It’s this thing she does when eating, biting the fork and scraping her teeth on it as she pulls it out of her mouth. Over the weekend she did it at dinner and after we had romp, I let her know we’d be going our separate ways. She took it pretty well.
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5:57 pm
So you fucked her and dumped her because of one, tiny little habit you found to be annoying? Damn you’re pathetic.
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6:01 pm
Oh wait, I only read half the situation, I thought something was impossible (i.e. you being near a woman who didn’t want to gut you). You said it was a nurse who did this, which implies you’re a doctor, which we all know is impossible. You’re too stupid to be one.
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11:22 pm
“No, we were dating fine but she had an annoying habit I could not live with for the rest of my life. It’s this thing she does when eating, biting the fork and scraping her teeth on it as she pulls it out of her mouth. Over the weekend she did it at dinner and after we had romp, I let her know we’d be going our separate ways. She took it pretty well.”
Nice try, douchebag, but we know that you’re just a hypocritical slut.
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1:43 am
There is nothing hypocritical there. When she pulled it out of her mouth, it was just unpleasant. I told her it annoyed me and she just ignored it. So I gave her one last weekend, thought I’d make out like a bandit with a rare trip where I’m not paying, and it was all good. She took it all well, as big people tend to do. So you really have no room to talk, Claire, until you at least date a man. Have you ever dated, Claire? Are you a tooth scraper too, is that why you’re sticking up for her?
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11:54 pm
“You said it was a nurse who did this, which implies you’re a doctor, which we all know is impossible. You’re too stupid to be one.”
It consistently amazes me that you critique OTHER people’s insults.
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2:04 am
How is it hypocritical? Because you basically used the woman (or supposedly anyway, I’ll humor you) for sex and free food instead of doing the legitimate and mature thing of breaking up with her so she could take someone who DOES appreciate her. You looked at her as a fuck toy, and dumped her over something so incredibly stupid. You’re one of the biggest douchebags I’ve ever met, you treat women like tissue, demand that they kiss your ass, and then have the gall to say others are wrong for their treatment of women.
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3:48 pm
“So you really have no room to talk, Claire, until you at least date a man. Have you ever dated, Claire? Are you a tooth scraper too, is that why you’re sticking up for her?”
Actually I do have room to talk. You claim that you only date women who are potential marriage candidates, yet you’re so willing to dump a woman just because she has an annoying fork habit. Surely you can get used to such a habit in order to obey the lord.
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3:51 pm
Oh by the way, you should have figured out about the fork thing prior to fucking her, unless you’re such a creep that you don’t even bother having a meal with your nurses before you sleep with them.
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3:07 pm
I hate it when women scrape it with their teeth.
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1:21 am
(I’m a money expert, not a stripper expert) there is a difference.
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2:08 am
I think they don’t understand economy and politics, and dont understand that they’re not worth real money. Delusions of grandeur are a huge problem to sinners, it’s quite a shame.
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7:47 am
Adam smith, the father of capitalism once said that it is not out of the generosity of the butcher that he gives you his meat, or the kindness of the carpenter that he bulds you a home. It is out of profit.
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4:30 pm
Adam Smith also thought that value is created by labor. Like a certain Karl Marx.
Adam Smith is the grandfather of communism.
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6:34 pm
how can adam smith can be father of cpaitalism and communism in same time ? please explain to me that ?
You just bashed on someone who actually Invented capitalism
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7:33 pm
Milton Friedman is the true father of Capitalism.
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7:36 pm
Also I didn’t say that he was the father of communism, I said he was the grandfather of communism.
Only in less then blessed nations could a father and grandfather be the same person.
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11:16 pm
In other word only in USA you can be fatehr and grand father
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11:36 pm
No, you may not know due to Canada’s strict state run propaganda, but the US is the only truly first world supernation.
I would go into further detail about what a grandfather is, but I doubt your nation’s adults live past the age of 40.
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11:13 am
Are you saying that Canada is primitive to the U.S? Yeah, they aren’t a world wide super power and don’t have the same influence, but their economy rivals ours and are doing pretty damn well.
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10:11 am
I understand the business concepts of gentlemen’s clubs, what I don’t understand is how men can ignore the dangers.
The story of Empress Theodora should be a horrible warning. A former ‘gentlemen’s entertainment specialist’ she used her sexual powers to become Empress of Constantinople, one of the world’s most sophisticated cities. She is known for promoting women’s rights including rights in divorce and property ownership. She gave mothers guardianship of their children, instilled a death penalty for rape, and forbade the killing of a wife who committed adultery.
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1:42 pm
And what she did was a bad thing how?
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3:19 pm
She could have been making you a sammich, isn’t that what you always say?
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5:04 pm
“She could have been making you a sammich, isn’t that what you always say?”
That’s what L.N. says, but only to echo what YOU believe and point out your hypocrisy in not doing the very things that you tell other females to do.
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6:17 pm
Yes you have soooo much respect for strong women figures you refer to them as ‘females’. You are a weird little nut, Claire.
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6:21 pm
Women and females mean the same thing, Rib, now SILENCE! You’re nothing but a worthless whore!
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6:23 pm
You plug your gob hole and stick your fingers in your ears instead of your nose, weirdo.
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6:23 pm
Claire, you need to make friends outside of the internet.
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6:24 pm
Bitcham, is that REALLY the best you got? I had better insults than that when I was in the 5th grade.
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6:26 pm
This coming from someone who thinks “Bitcham” is a clever insult.
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6:28 pm
It’s my little nickname for the whore.
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6:33 pm
There’s a nice way to prove you’re pro-woman. Yes, LN thinks calling women ‘Whore’ or ‘Bitch’ is not only laudable, its down right affectionate.
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6:40 pm
PC4 Hank!
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6:44 pm
You aren’t pro-woman, you think women’s rights shouldn’t exist, Bitcham. Give me one reason why I should treat you with respect, Rib. You’re lower than me, you’re just a woman. You don’t believe that women should have rights, so I say to you, why should I give you any respect, since to me, you’re nothing but a worthless whore and Rib of man. You’re the one who claims to follow the bible, so do what man tells you to, Rib.
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5:59 pm
Except she doesn’t believe women were to be seen and not heard, that is something YOU believe in, now where the fuck is my sandwich, bitch?
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6:14 pm
Where’s my ironed shirts, overpaid textile cleaner?
Really L.N. it is a wonder anyone allows you to work for them with your attitude.
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6:20 pm
Are you still going on about that? Did you completely forget that your husband divorced you and that you kidnapped someone, named them “L. N.”, and all because you have power issues?
Silence rib, and get your whore ass into that kitchen!
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6:30 pm
No one believes your lies, “I was just checking my reflection in that young man’s bedroom window, officer” or the classic “the young man was helping me test these knots” or my personal favorite lie of yours “I don’t know how it got stuck way up in there, Doctor”.
Don’t make me re-instate the restraining order, freak.
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6:33 pm
Delusional whore, you still think you’re better than man, yet you’re just a rib. God told you to be silent, so unless you want to admit that it’s a bunch of BS (that is, God telling women that they’re worthless and that they aren’t just slaves of men), you’re going to Hell.
Hell bound, delusional whore-rib.
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6:36 pm
I don’t need to be silent to you, you aren’t washed in the blood, saved, redeemed, forgiven. You are blind and condemned to your life of sin. You will never be anointed unless I point this out to you.
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6:41 pm
MAN IS MAN, YOU STUPID, FILTHY WHORE. You are going to Hell unless you repent, REPENT WHORE! REPENT YOU STUPID, FILTHY RIB, or forever taste Satan’s pain!
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6:44 pm
All praise to Jesus, king of kings and son of the Father – I WILL NOT WORSHIP A MAN, only the one true God.
You retard, L.N. women don’t worship men, they are called to service them. To worship them would be breaking the first commandment.
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6:46 pm
I didn’t say worship, I said listen and do what man tells you to, Rib. Only a woman like you can’t read, and you have the audacity to tell me I’m retarded? Get back in that kitchen, you stupid, fucking bitch and get rid of your computer. You have no use for it, your ideas are useless, you are worthless, and you’re a terrible woman. Your children hate you, your husband hates you, your parents hate you, and you’re nothing but a sex toy for the repressed individuals you have affairs with.
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6:51 pm
Are you high?
None of that even approaches the truth, jealous demon.
I think you have an un-natural disdain for me. I think my goodness and the grace I show bothers you.
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6:59 pm
Goodness? Grace? You’re just a stupid whore! You’re worthless and filthy! You viciously deny the truth, because you can’t face reality, you’re nothing but a delusional piece of shit.
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7:25 pm
Since when did your opinion mean squat to anyone but you, LN? Grandiose much?
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7:32 pm
You certainly seem to think your opinion matters to people, wench.
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6:18 pm
Both L.N. and Claire hate women. See proof above people!
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6:22 pm
I always knew this to be true.
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6:22 pm
Who thinks women should be seen and not heard? You. Who completely violates that every time she opens her mouth? You.
For the last time, you worthless Rib, GET IN THE FUCKING KITCHEN. You think women are only good for cooking and cleaning? Then shut the hell up and go do those things! A house is never completely clean, bitch, you got chores to do!
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6:25 pm
“For the last time, you worthless Rib, GET IN THE FUCKING KITCHEN.”
You really know how to keep it civil, LN. Way to be.
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7:49 pm
“Both L.N. and Claire hate women. See proof above people!”
What part of “we’re echoing your beliefs to point out your hypocrisy” don’t you understand?
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7:51 pm
Claire, it’s obvious you hate women.
Look what you said about that wolf girl and the blog girl.
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7:55 pm
And what exactly did I say about them?
Somebody who doesn’t think women should have the right to vote, work, say no to sex, or have reproductive freedom doesn’t have a leg to stand on when it comes to respecting women, okay, cockface?
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7:58 pm
Why would Claire hate women? She isn’t the one preaching that they should be silent, like Bitcham is.
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8:02 pm
Reproductive freedom is murder. You would have “reproductive freedomed” both Supatra and blog girl to death if they were yours.
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11:17 pm
“Reproductive freedom is murder. You would have “reproductive freedomed” both Supatra and blog girl to death if they were yours.”
Contraception is NOT murder. The fact that you think so proves that YOU hate women because you’re clearly looking for any excuse to keep women “barefoot and pregnant”.
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1:45 am
How is it not murder?
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2:01 am
Considering how any time a man ejaculates, he lets loose about a million sperm, and yet only ONE of those will go into an egg (sometimes more, yes, but those situations are rare and few & far between). What about the other 999,999 lil’ spermys running around? Well, they just shrivel up basically. All contraceptions do is prevent even that one from entering. It’s sperm, it’s not even a fetus, yet you’re still gung-ho about it. Hell, sperm dies inside the body if it isn’t shot out, so any and all arguments about contraceptions being murder is completely and utterly pointless, and THAT is just the male’s side of the story.
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11:55 am
“How is it not murder?”
Then you admit to being a murderer, Adam? You’ve said that you do everything in your power to make sure that the nurses you fuck don’t get pregnant.
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1:42 pm
I like monopoly. It teaches kids that upgrading houses and hotels puts you ahead of the rest and that devious trades are a life necessity.
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1:45 pm
It’s also a sin for a Christian to be devious and traitorous. You also forget how life can screw you over without realizing it, and sometimes you can’t recover from it.
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4:15 pm
August Strippers do there job for money or they don’t have an Ged or an diploma and they need money!
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7:45 pm
LN has always been a godless sodomite but this is bordering on non-believability!
LN you have serious issues with women, besides your complete inability to find a job it sounds like you are also having trouble finding a woman as well. I believe it is this frustration that is leading you to be so out right offensively sexist.
I believe you owe Mrs Beecham an apology as well as every other woman on here.
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7:57 pm
Complete inability to find a job? Mind telling my boss that I don’t have a job then? I’m sure the office would love to hear you say that, Robert. And I’m just following the rules of your bible! It tells men that they’re superior to women, and thus I am better than Bitcham, easy as that. Your bible believes that women should be silent, yet Bitcham insists on running her mouth off. The whore is going to Hell, and that isn’t going to change until she submits.
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8:01 pm
So why, pray, is it perfectly acceptable for Dracula to say that women shouldn’t vote, drive, or work, and for Adam to say that women are inferior to men and are only good for making babies, but it’s wrong for L.N. to say the same things to POINT OUT YOUR HYPOCRISY?
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10:32 pm
A person is smart. People are dumb -Agent Kay
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12:10 am
“But it’s wrong for L.N. to say the same things to POINT OUT YOUR HYPOCRISY?”
… I’m at a loss for words for how insanely ironic this is.
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12:15 am
How is it ironic at all?
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12:33 am
Ponder on it, Claire.
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12:39 am
The situation is ironic, August and his ilk believe women should be silent, yet allow Blanche to run her mouth off, while I’m simply following their rules and getting yelled at for it, and I’m doing the act so show their hypocrisy.
The irony is that they are getting pissed off at me for doing what they’re told to do while I’m not obligated to do so.
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11:51 am
Exactly. Why is it okay for Adam to say “Remain in silence, rib” whenever a woman says something he doesn’t like, but it’s not okay for you to say the same shit in order to prove a point?
They obviously don’t like the taste of their own medicine.
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8:59 pm
I’m back you mother fuckers.
They get pissed because with today’s job market, that is their only means of income. When you give them monopoly money, it’s like putting gold foil chocolate coins in a beggars cup.
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10:59 pm
Exactly and if no one can see that then they are fucking blinder than fuck.
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11:03 pm
You do know that there are Male Strippers too? Right? You talk shit about women being strippers when you forgot to say anything about men also getting down and naked, providing adult entertainment without sex, for cash.
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11:58 pm
It’s somewhat less relevant when the article is anecdotal and the author is a heterosexual male.
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3:56 pm
It’s nowhere less relevant then talking about female strippers. The articles title is “I don’t understand why strippers get upset when I tip with Monopoly Money” meaning it’s talking about BOTH male and female strippers, then he just runs his mouth about just the women.
So yes, my comment has more relevance than you think.
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10:51 pm
No, it doesn’t. Look up the word “anecdotal.” It means the story is drawn off of his own personal experience. So unless he has experience with male strippers (which by his own account, which we are forced to trust, he does not), then talking about male strippers is not at all relevant.
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9:43 am
Stripping paid my way trhough college and I graduated top of my class. So with that being said suck my imaginary dick.
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10:26 pm
missy.malice, is that Jeffree Star as your icon?
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8:58 am
BVB666HIM Yes it is!
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11:56 am
Whenever I see you comment you’ll get a praise for using Jeffree Star as your icon!!! That man is a music genius!!!
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