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YoutubeLA County Outlaws Throwing Frisbee on the Beach, You Will Get a $1000 Fine
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Bren Langford
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frisbee fine malibu frisbee illegal on la county beaches la country outlaws frisbee on beachesThe classic scenes of beach-goers tossing a Frisbee on a lazy day in Malibu and Santa Monica is now done and a thing of the past. LA County officials have now made it a criminal offense to toss a frisbee or football on any beach.
Los Angeles county has pretty much destroyed the fun, freedom and carelessness that goes with a lazy day at the beach. In one fell swoop of some absent minded official, LA County has officially banned throwing any object on the beach – be it a football, a Frisbee, a juice box, or a friend into the ocean – unless you want to be arrested and stuck with a $1000 fine.
The shocking news has left many beach-goers irate and shocked. A normal part of any beach-goers car is a Frisbee. It’s a classic pickup line immortalized by tales of old and movies. Throw a Frisbee into a group of cute girls, get shot down by your buds, and then get a good game of ultimate Frisbee going.
Perhaps a bit of beach football? In Los Angeles, all of this is now illegal and a criminal offense.
In a massive 37-page ordinance, Los Angeles officials rolled out a preposterous statute that forbids “any person to cast, toss, throw, kick or roll” any object other than a beach ball or volleyball “upon or over any beach”. Beach volleyballs can only be used in predesignated areas.
If that slap in the face is not enough, kids are also now banned from making sand castles. Burying your friends under the sand is now also illegal. If any person is caught digging a whole in the beach “over 18 inches deep” (a ruler and a half), massive fines and criminal charges can and will be placed.
These laws are to protect ‘people and property’ during the busy beach season, but are actually another example of overbearing officials setting ordinances that are destroying the freedom and personal responsibility of Americans.
It’s common sense that if a beach is crowded with 5,000 people in a 30 yard area, you don’t have room for Frisbee. Walk to the next empty beach and have fun. If you jump into someone or destroy their property, expect to be sued or cover costs. It’s the common sense, way of life that exists everywhere else. Do they really have to make Frisbee and digging sand for a sand castle illegal acts with massive fines?
ObamAmerica.
– WE INTERVIEWED THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE ON THE SUBJECT –
The American Perspective: What do you think of Los Angeles’ decision to criminalize throwing a Frisbee on the beach?
WC Manns – I.T. Guru Extraordinaire from Phoenix, AZ
“California is a darn stupid state.”
Holly B. – The Sweetest Peach in Georgia
“Well, I was once hit in the head with a Frisbee (really, I hope they called them flying discs because Frisbee is a trademark) and it “left a mark”. I was watching waves and BAMMO, hit me right in the back of the head. I turned to look, and the boys throwing them all had six pack abs!. They were tan and fit and we know what THAT means (P90X… hint hint). I started to feel faint, collapsed and woke up with one of them doing mouth to mouth and chest compressions on me!!!
“I can’t continue. It’s too painful…”
“I hope I don’t have AIDS, now.”
Michael Q – American Naval Hero in Honolulu, HI
“Good, that Frisbee is just going to end up on the bottom of the ocean anyway. F*ck Frisbees.”
Robert H – Forger of Morality from Chico, CA
“Frisbee’s are the gateway to the Devil’s playground.”
Aidan D – Redcoat Music Guru from Southampton, United Kingdom
“I for one am glad of this. Too many children are outside playing sports and hurting their fellow man when they could be studying the book of Genesis.”
Shannon A. – Talented Thespian from Tempe, AZ
“The first step in taking our good Christian beaches back from the patchouli wearin’ , Frisbee throwin’ hippies. Good job L.A. County!”
Carrie R. – Philosopher/Mastermind Communicator from Ohio
“This just makes sense to me. Lots of wardrobe malfunctions happen while playing Frisbee- Tops pop off, parts get exposed, children get corrupted.”
Jose de L. – Musician/Songwriter from faith-loving Fresno, CA
“People underestimate the number of deaths by runaway frisbee.”
Craig B. – Double O Agent of Suave from Romford, United Kingdom
“Keeping trash off the beach is a problem the State of California has struggled to get to grips with. Banning the throwing of frisbee is a great first step however. Homosexuals will now have to go elsewhere to play their favourite sport.”
Norman J – Political Powerhouse from Oklahoma weighs in:
“Those damn hippie liberals are at it again, frisbees are the true nature of christs spirit, flying freely through the sky like the man himself. I think we should get rid of California as a state.”
Mike M. – Folk Singer from Jackson, Tennessee
“I guess all the fetch it games with your pets are over and done with.”
Alexander R – Freedom Loving Patriot from New England
“I’m happy that our lord Jesus decided to pass this law. Frisbees are well-known homosexual paraphernalia which should have no place on LA.”
Kubba J. – Illustrator from Somewhere Near the Amish, Pennsylvania
“God made birds to fly, not frisbees. If God wanted frisbees to fly, he would have also given them wings but did not. It’s clear to me that at least one person in California has an ounce of cents in them, and they’re not all heathen homogays. These man made tools of heresy are a diamond dozen, but it’s good to know that someone isn’t taking our Creator’s design for granite and protecting the public from these devil discs.”
Nick I – Race Car Driver from Alabama shares a harrowing story.
“My virginity was stolen by a runaway frisbee 
”
Alex Starski – from Potentially Somewhere Communist Yet Moral, Soviet Union
“Horpfully this will prevent the queersexuals from frolicking around in their v-necks and Abercombie. Los Angeles needs to take the city back from the homogays that run the streets.”
– Ian B. – Manly Underoos Model from Los Angeles, CA
“We’re all lucky Point Break was made in more pro-beach frisbee times.”
Laura D. from Michigan reminds us that Frisbee can be deadly, with this timely YouTube Classic.
What are your thoughts on this?
- Excited
- Fascinated
- Amused
- Bored
- Sad
- Angry
Born and raised in SoCal, Bren Langford is currently a student, lifeguard and lifestyle editor for ChristWire Campus Weekly. 
I love these interactive articles. I hope we see more input from true America and less for people living in their parent’s basements.
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oh come on August, you dont have to call out LN like that, now we are going to have to read him complain about not getting a job and how drafty it is in his moms basement.
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Laughing Out Loud! Nailed it, Susan!
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Only retards spell out ‘lol’, and why am I not surprised that Billings’ slow return to this site is accompanied by his boyfriend, Clownboy?
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Yeah, that coming from someone who wears his dead grandma’s clothing. Robert, are you capable of anything BUT hate?
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Your the one filled with hate, need I pull some of your sexist qoutes from Blanches most recent article.
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Bitcham thinks women shouldn’t have rights. Therefore, I’m treating her the way she thinks women should be treated; like dirt. If she doesn’t like it, then she can stop saying how women’s rights are terrible.
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I just hope this new law includes hacky sacks. I can’t stand those silly things! Those kids never look where they’re kicking and it can be awfully frustrating.
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You’d outlaw hacky sacks? You’re THAT petty?
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Hacky sacks are also illegal on the beach.
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what next you going to have it illegal islam ? buddhism hinduism other religion Freedom Perhaps blakc people can’t go to beach as well ?
seriously USA the land of freedom , Mya ss yess I prefer My Good Old Canada at least we can breathe
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Islam is not a religion, it is a political activist organization. Since it’s ultimate goal is the murder of Christians and overthrow of our democracy, it should be labelled as treason and declared illegal but dear Obama is far too soft on these people. Do you even understand how long the hippies and homosexuals would last under a Muslim theocracy? They’d be killed rather quickly. I just don’t understand why the liberals support these people.
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Switch all instances of Islam and Christianity, and replace Obama with Bush and you’ve got about half that nonsense and garbage right for once.
“Do you even understand how long the hippies and homosexuals would last under a Muslim theocracy? They’d be killed rather quickly. ”
And people like you want to do worse, you want to remove their rights, prevent them from being happy with the ones they love, and force them into ‘correctional facilities’ where you practically torture them, making them feel bad for who they are, many times to a point where they either end up living a life of denial and depression, or they end up killing themselves because of so much pressure from people like you. What’s really tragic is you fools don’t understand this until you witness it first hand. Hell, even hearsay won’t make you budge.
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its not what you wanted to do Billings
you wanted to destroy the very frabric of freedom in the world with christianity
ISlam is a religion as much is christianity
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If you think a Muslim theocracy would be better for America than a Christian democracy, you are beyond help. Are you just an idiot or are you some nasty conspirator trying to foment evil in this world? I can’t hardly tell…
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You mean a Christian tyranny, seeing as how you’ve said before that you want to remove the rights of basic citizens. At least you know what extremist Muslims will do, they don’t lie through their teeth like you do.
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So glad I live outside your fucked up country. T.T
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we should spread the world anyway the most intelligent people in USA are not even the white christian people
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They ban American pastimes such as playing with a frisbee on the beach yet allow sodomites to marry?
What happened to California?
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California has been run by the pervs ever since the homosexuals and the drug addicts colonized Hollywood in the 1920s.
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Just file anything that you think is evil under ‘homosexual’, and don’t let anyone who’s actually intelligent tell you otherwise!
Moron.
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Bren that was a good read. I never realized just how serious playing freebie can be. I too grew up in L.A. and spent much time on the beaches between Zuma to Santa Monica. With all the people on those beaches today the new law will probably save lives.
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Only in California is it illegal to throw a Frisbee but perfectly legal to marry your rump humping faerie boy friend or clam diddling butch girl toy. I am so glad I live in a christian state.
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I’m not sure I disagree with this ban. Frisbee is a sport of the homogay. One “throws” and the other “catches.” No thanks. Honk, honk!
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A harlequin? How peculiar.
How would frisbee differ from any average game of catch? They are just games, something that brings joy.
As a harlequin, I assume you know of joy?
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Two shirtless males tossing a stiff disc back and forth. How is that not of the homogay?
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They do not have to be shirtless though. You can frisbee in a park or even a neighborhood, anyone of any age or any gender can play frisbee.
It is a simple game.
You do not seem like a fun harlequin…
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There are plenty of “fun” activities which will split hell wide open upon death. You seem to arrive at your conclusions without considering the words of Jesus Christ. I will pray for you!
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Care to explain what other “fun” activities “will split hell wide open” so that I may proceed to pick your logic apart?
I have no need for the messiah in my belief.
Please, do not pray for me.
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LOGIC, laughing out loud! You think you have all the answers. But, without Christ there is no all. Please seek the truth!
To answer your question about activities, it is any activity which is tainted by homgayality. Dr. Billings is an expert in exposing such SINS.
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The very fact you cling to a fictional messiah shows how simple minded you truly are. Talking to you has started to become quite a bore. Not a very fun harlequin…
You do not need faith to know truth, quite the opposite as faith as a bad habit of blinding people to the truth.
“homogay” is such a redundant and idiotic way to say homosexual. The more times you and your flock use it, the more idiotic you look.
There is nothing wrong with homosexuals.
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“There is nothing wrong with homosexuals.:
Now look who is talking crazy.
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Only ignorant fools would think its crazy.
There is nothing wrong with homosexuals. They are just people and do not deserve the lies and hate you people of Christwire constantly bombard them with.
You all are despicable
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Homogays fornicate in unusual and disgusting methods. They are not normal people.
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Straight couples can also fornicate in unusual and disgusting ways, most fetishes are unusual in their own way.
There is no such thing as truly normal, we are all unusual in our own ways.
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If you went to the zoo and saw two animals reproducing, you would think “that’s nature’s way…” some immature people might point and giggle, but it wouldn’t be much news. Now if you saw 2 animals performing oral sex or anal sex, everyone would be shocked, and why? Because it is abnormal!!!
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You don’t see any animals using the internet, does that make the internet unusual? You don’t see animals driving cars, does that make cars unusual? Animals in the wild don’t get regular medication, does that make medication unusual?
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Clownboy, do you like football?
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You are all very pathetic. Do you really call yourselves Christians? Do you hide on this so-called Christian website and conduct these rants continuously with no positive impact in life whatsoever?
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yet I’m sure you Love football after all it’s similar to frisbee but with thight pant
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Well no one has said it yet so I’ll do it. I blame the Mexicans. If you go down to the junction between Zuma and Westward, you’ll see it is always littered with thousands of clamoring Mexicans who aren’t even using the beach properly. The guys show up in gaucho pants and the women all fat and wearing day dresses. Some of the vatos where jeans and wife-beating tshirts. They bring huge umbrellas and coolers, just using up the beach like it’s some big, sloppy inner city municipal park. One even brought a grill out there even though it’s illegal to have fires on the beach too. If we get rid of Mexicans, we’ll have room on our beaches to play frisbee.
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As a first time reader of this website, I am not impressed. You are all very pathetic. Do you really call yourselves Christians? Do you hide on this so-called Christian website and conduct these rants continuously with no positive impact in life whatsoever?
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