• Skyrim, Homogay and Rap Music Allow Satan to Sneak Into Suburban Family’s Home

    February 3, 2012 2:54 pm 56 comments

    When you allow Satanic things into your home, you set the welcome mat out for POSSESSED HOME INVASION. Case and point!

    If that picture gave you a heart attack just now, too bad!  Take it as a lesson of what will happen to all America if we continually allow demonic things to enter our homes!

    This is a detective photograph that is shocking the internet today.  In Amhurst, Maine, a family suddenly disappeared last week and investigators received warrant to enter their home yesterday.  There is no sign of a family.  Nothing was out of place, except for in the room of the family’s oldest son.

    On his computer there was Skyrim:  The Elder Scrolls paused.  The child’s ‘Bottom Bosmer’ blood elf (a type of ‘power bottom’ homosexual clergy one can buy in the game) was doing a ritual and an investigator stated “It looked like the game had just frozen”.  The child has received 666 EM points (Epic Mount Points).

    In Skyrim, EM points are given for each act of homosexuality a character allows another to perform on him.  For every ten homosexual ‘skyrim jobs’ allowed, a player receives 1 epic mount point.  At LAN parties (Loosened Anal ‘Noobie’) parties, new players to the game can physically meet up with other seasoned, experienced gays and allow one of them to physically epic mount them from behind.  Allowing yourself to be epic mounted once (only one is allowed per player account) will get you 100 points.

    Tyson Bowers III calculates that this means the missing boy (19 years old and a college student) had performed at least 500 to 600 homosexual acts on Skyrim, and had likely been molested by a gay at least one time at a LAN party.  This number may sound shocking, but keep in mind that those stats mean the boy was a ‘noobie’ and was just getting started.  On average, a male Skyrim player has particpated in over 3,000 gay acts.

    What’s even more shocking is that a rap cd was found playing on the boy’s record player.  The song playing was from “Tyler The Creator” and a song about devil’s magic stuck in a loop.  According to officers, ‘the voice was warped, drug ridden and psychotic.’

    All other things in the family’s home seemed normal, until the face of Satan was seen peeking from behind a pillow in the picture we see above.

    What most likely happened is that with all the homosexuality, evil video game and witchcraft black rap music playing, Satan felt right at home and invited himself in.  The parents had no clue he was in their home and with just a snap of his fingers, he sent them all to hell.  How horrible is it to know that you can allow Satan into your home by just allowing his most possessed forms of sins to dwell where you live.

    At this point, it goes without saying that if your child is playing Skyrim, listening to rap or seems suspiciously gay, that you should slap them, take away any potentially evil game and put them in boot camp or counseling.  That is unless you want your entire family to burn in hell.  Don’t end up like this family and be missing on the eternal milk cartoon of hopelessness.

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    Abe If you don't like what you just read here you can just get out of my country. Now how about that smart-alack. Follow me on twitters. Poke me as your New Friend on Facebook!!

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