• Valentines for Heathens

    February 5, 2012 3:39 pm 171 comments
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  • Rather than allowing St. Valentine’s Day to remain a religious holiday of love, merchants and entrepreneurs have created expressions of endearment that defile the definition of Christian love by catering to a low brow variety of homosexual, racist and feminist agendas. I must warn you even the Syrims and Minecrafters are representing. These are only a few examples. The following cards MUST be taken off the market with focused boycotts.

    Print and distribute as needed so others may report any of these vile cards occurring in the wild.

    1 – Closeted Homosexuals

    2 – Self-Abusers that Rape themselves with ‘M’

    3 – Racists that Hate White People

    4 – Mother Mockers, Those that Mock a Mother’s Love

    5 – Willful Women that Usurp Man’s Natural Dominance

    6 – Cat Daddies – Those that pander to Foul Mouthed Crazy Cat Women

    7 – Fans of the “L” Word and Chunky yet Comfortable Shoes

    8 – People that Stick Building Supplies in their Rectum

    9 – Bromancers

    10 – Men who believe the digestive track is for something other than digestion.

    11 – People that play too many role playing games.

    12 – Minecrafters

    13 – Loud Mouthed Commentators on Internet Forums

    14 – People that confuse Social Media with Social Life

    15 – Dictators that love their peoples

    16 – The Illiterate

    17 – People so full of Vanity, they think Pajama Jeans look good on them

    18 – Jealous girls with Sluts for friends

    19 – Men with fat Wives

    20 – Furries, those sick people that dress up in animal costumes and leave protein stains on each other.

    21 – Mockery of a Man’s Ability to Allow a Woman to have Affections for Him

    22 – People that think Valentine’s Day is a celebration of spreading VD.

    23 – Skyrims players

    24 – Pothers or Bronies or Whatever those people are.

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    About The Author
    Blanche Beecham "Blanche Beecham lends a soft, learned hand to the fourth estate with incite-full investigations on diverse topics such as Politics, Love, and Lifestyle. Her many years experience as a wife, mother, ladies book club president and financial auditor make her well suited to ferreting out the truth and giving it a sound shake." - Rev. Jackson Lee Whitebelley, Publisher and Editor of "The Incubator" - Follow me on Twitter! @BLANCHEBEECHAM

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