Instead of Sex Education, Let’s Teach Girls How to Play with Baby Dolls Properly
As part of ‘Sex Education’, nearly 87% of public middle and high schools have special infant simulation dolls that teach girls how to care for babies. While more instructive than the curse laden Teen Moms reality shows, these virtual reality dolls cannot replace the enduring benefits of young girls playing with baby dolls at an early age. Infant simulators teach girls to avoid motherhood by reducing maternity to a list of do’s and don’ts rather than highlighting the joy of womanhood. Intelligent play can address this deficit.
Before the days of cell phones or even cable television, kids played. Young people rode bikes without helmets. They ran barefooted on gravel. The world was something raw and dangerous to discover, not distilled and pasteurized like a traveling nature exhibit at the local library. Play was spontaneous and unplanned. No “Mommy and Me”, no play dates or the ludicrous idea of ‘structured play’ existed in those days. It had a profound effect.
Today’s reasonable, mature woman that respects herself, her body and men is 98% more likely to have engaged in positive doll play as a young girl. Playing with dolls is a rehearsal for real life as a woman. For girls this means not only learning how to care for babies, but how those duties dictate a woman’s role in society. Perhaps girls can learn a thing or two and reconnect with this tried and true character building experience instead of taking ‘Sex Education’ classes that are driven to usurp her Godly womanly charisma with a ‘to do list’.
Three Injuns, Five Pioneer Women and 25 Babies in a Covered Wagon
Perhaps due to the popularity of the Laura Ingells Wilder “Little House on the Prairie” books, my sister Bridget Lynn, five of our cousins, me and a neighbor girl would all re-enact pioneer old west scenarios in my Aunt’s yard. While a passing adult might see chaotic yard apes, it was in fact a University level course on the female mind, sexual development and childcare.
The yard included a decent patch of mostly clover bordered by a long gravel driveway and fairly sloped wooded hillside. The air there always seemed charged when we played. It wasn’t simply because we were packin’ heat in the form of cap guns that would release an acrid puff of smoke. Our senses, dulled by classrooms and concentrated good behavior, was electrified and enhanced. Even the sunshine had a flavor. Water slurped from the green garden hose was quenching and delicious.
The hillside was littered with old leaves and dead branches that kept the ground moist underneath. It made climbing up slow and slippery (even for the sure footed) and going down fast if a person was to drag a saucer sled or Big Wheel up the hill. The three boys usually took to the hills to plot and scheme the swift demise of ‘the girls camp’. My aunt’s discarded make up made perfect war paint. This left us five pioneer women on our own to setup a base camp and prepare for Injun attacks. The stakes in this game were pretty high.
If caught, we would ‘baptize’ the native heathens in a rain barrel conveniently located away from the prying eyes of any adults. There were always some kind of spidery legged water bug to be found in the barrel which legend stated would eat your eyeballs if you showed any fear. While today’s liberals might smugly shout “waterboarding!” nothing could be further from the truth in practice. The head dunking was a badge of honor for the boys and taught them valuable lessons regarding a woman’s ire and creative vengeance.
We used some old aluminum lawn chairs with ratted webbing, long forked sticks from the woods and some old quilts to make the bonnet ‘cover’ for our covered wagon. We propped these up on the picnic table my uncle made in his wood shop. It was perfect for sheltering the 25 baby dolls in our care.
It was never a topic of discussion, but it certainly was implied that the fathers of these 25 babies met some horrible end at the hands of marauding natives. It was also unclear which babies belonged to which mother. We simply saw each of them as precious and worthy of our fierce and oftentimes eerily coordinated protection. Through play, girls learn instinctively about the special properties of ‘being a girl’ affords – properties like transmitting and receiving messages from the female ovary collective. Unlike twitters, women are factory equipped with message snatchels to send and receive short bursts of information to one another. These are located near the ovaries and behind the storage unit that records every mistake a man ever makes.
While ‘sex education’ classes and most male’s understanding of a woman’s body reject the notion of the uterus as a transmitter of a collective female conscientiousness, through play one readily sees the power of the uterus to drive behaviors of those around them, whether they have a uterus or not. Only by playing with dolls can this ever be fully understood and appreciated.
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Blanche Beecham
"Blanche Beecham lends a soft, learned hand to the fourth estate with incite-full investigations on diverse topics such as Politics, Love, and Lifestyle. Her many years experience as a wife, mother, ladies book club president and financial auditor make her well suited to ferreting out the truth and giving it a sound shake." - Rev. Jackson Lee Whitebelley, Publisher and Editor of "The Incubator" - Follow me on Twitter! @BLANCHEBEECHAM
2:37 am
Young women are starting to abandon dolls for sex toys, science fairs and erotic video games. We need to take back traditional toys to ensure that young ladies don’t lose their feminine wiles. If we don’t, we’ll be stuck with generations of hideous, lesbian single moms destroying America while they poorly fix cars and build apartment buildings because gender roles are “terrible”. Another great article, Blanche! More women should be like you!
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10:48 am
some of them even go into sports!
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5:45 pm
And (non-erotic) video games. I enjoy playing Cooking Mama, Animal Crossing: City Folk, and Super Smash Bros. Brawl on my Wii, and Animal Crossing: Wild World, Super Scribblenauts and Harvest Moon on my DS. But I still like to cook and draw (safe for work) manga.
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2:45 pm
Let’s not get started on how lame your name is “Chris Chris”. Your parents must have hated you from the day you were born. And if that black and white photo is any indication of your actual looks, I can fully understand why. Oh, and Blanche, the only people who name their kids Blanche are those that don’t want any other man touching them because daddy is too busy diddling them. Perhaps that’s why you feel so obligated to attempt to oppress women’s rights. You’re in the wrong country for that, you fucking cunt.
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2:47 pm
I’m sure you both would be fully supportive of sex ed in school if girls weren’t allowed to attend.
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3:29 am
OO OOO I wanna help this crap of a site for once. Starbucks, Gay’s, Now go on Google and let’s see what crap you can turn that into.
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5:29 am
Whatever happened to playing with Raggedy Ann Dolls? It seemed to me that when little girls played with them their demeanor was more calm as today’s girls, who kick and scream with every Justin Beeber video they see.
I don’t think it’s any coincident that as soon as they started teaching young girls to put prophylactics of bananas that their moods started to become shrill. The devil has indeed entered their souls.
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9:17 am
Blanche could you email me the picture of the little girl tied to the tree. Great article. TY
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11:28 am
looking for something to fap to, are we?
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12:36 pm
I sure am, any recommendations?
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1:17 pm
nope… you wouldn’t like what I have to reccomend
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1:29 pm
Sex-ed for middle and high school girls is just wrong. You wouldn’t teach kids to smoke and then tell them go and don’t do it, so why tempt them with sex. A boy can teach a girl everything she needs to know when he decides it is time.
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1:50 pm
and there is just so much to teach! like the proper way to tie a knot, or how to sharpen their nails into claws that dig into your skin as they grab a hold of you to spit in your face and tell you exactly how worthless you are. I’ll have to teach her the definition of contempt.
on second thought, keep sex ed, that sounds like too much work for me.
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3:11 pm
You just described a good time…
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3:51 pm
I know
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3:28 pm
my sex ed was blood on the dancefloor
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4:03 pm
Your sex ed caused children to have children.
Although you did do the right thing and took responsibility.
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5:48 pm
They should just bring some abstinence guest speakers instead. I remember that my school did that for Phys. Ed and the speakers gave out free candy!
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3:54 pm
So… women have no right to know how THEIR bodies work? And women have no right to know where babies come from until a boy teaches her? Dude… sex-ed is not just about “how to do it”… it’s composed of what happens when and after… and what’s involved. So… why is it okay for boys to know and not girls? Oh, and I guess you know more about your wife’s (if you have one… if you do, I don’t understand what she sees in you) body than she does… which I DOUBT you do.
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5:09 pm
I’m starting doubt Blanche is really a female. Either that or she’s delusional/ignorant.
Dolls are only toys. I only played with dolls when I was little because I thought they were kind of fun. I never once thought about becoming what ‘a woman should be’. When I was younger I never wanted kids when I got older. I always thought how babies were made was disgusting and giving birth was painful. (I have younger siblings and while I wasn’t 100% knowledgable about sex, I knew it took two naked people and that giving birth caused the woman to scream in pain. In the my childhood mind that was gross and painful and I wanted to avoid that.) Playing with dolls had nothing to do with that. Dolls are TOYS. Just like jumpropes, hoola hoops, remote control cars, ect.
The sex-ed part of my health classes were only ‘Don’t have sex until marriage’, ‘Don’t have sex or you could get pregnant’, ‘Don’t have sex or you might get an STD’, and what the STDs were like, and briefly explaining how babies are conceived in a serious and unerotic way.
I’m serious though, how does Blanche get this stuff in her head? Blanche, please cite where you got this information or admit this is just what you believe dolls are are meant to do or whatever it is you wrote this article for. And honestly – what on earth was that nonsense about uterus whatever-it-was? That last picture and last two paragraph made no sense to me at all.
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2:41 pm
the abstinence guest speakers are always funny,like the ones that try to be “hip” to connect to the youth XD,
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3:32 pm
Thank you for your reply.
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3:53 pm
Claire, are you a pedophile?
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