• Coachella Lineup 2012 – The Black Lips Cole Alexander Whips Out Twiddle Rompus, Plays Guitar With It

    April 14, 2012 7:37 pm 6 comments
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  • Coachella 2012 – The Black Lips Cole Alexander Whips Out Flash Guitar, Twaddles it On Stage

    Coachella Valley, CA -The Black Lips are a ‘flower punk band’ from Atlanta, Georgia. Flower punk is a sick genre of rock where in the middle of a song, men whip out their flesh dandies and ‘pollinate’ the gaping mouths of the female fans. The singers of the band call themselves “Dandy Lions” and their female fans are called their Kitty Pride. Parents may be shocked to hear this, but consider that at Coachella 2011 Bryan Blake reported LSD, quaaludes, magic mint, abortion orgies and even 20 counts of reverse sodomy on the first grounds alone.

    The Black Lips wasted no time spreading their perversion at Coachella. At the Mojave Dessert tent, the band promised plenty of ‘free drugs and abortions’ for any young woman who showed up. Considering the for every 5 girls who attend Coachella, 3 end up passed out and impregnated on the first day the girls could not pas this chance up. ChristWire interns report that at 2:15 pm PST, the “Flower Punk” act occurredf and Cole Alexander whipped out his tallywhacker.

    What’s sick is that to get the girls in the crowd juiced up, the band sang a song called “Bad Kids” to ruin the self esteem and then followed it up with Dumpster Dive, a song where all the first time male fans in the crowd are to also pull down their pants, bend over and let the seasoned band members take a thrusting dumpster dive into their backsides.

    As all this happened, the crowd simply acted like it was normal and drank beers.

    The band members are all actually African American, hence the name ‘The Black Lips’. Much like Calvin Broadus, they suffer from vitiligo and oft wear their hair in dreadlocks to attract raver punks and surf dudes to come partake in the flesh-orgies they throw. While authorities are still trying to get hold of the situation, it’s estimated that 9 acts of reverse sodomy and 89 counts of pregnancy causing motions took place in the entire ordeal. It’s impossible to calculate how many women received a Dandy Lion’s mouth spray from the stage.

    Shocking Black Lips, Cole Alexander Coachella 2012 video coming soon. Observe them here in meantime:

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    About The Author
    Frank Meyer Conservative Republican and believer of first amendment rights.

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