Hefty Michael Moore Shocks Beachgoers at Malibu’s Zuma Beach
Beachgoers at Malibu, California’s Zuma Beach terrified by beached celebrity, Michael Moore reportedly able to free himself from beach chair after 40 minute rescue efforts.
Malibu, CA – Fattened by the greedy pork barrels of liberalism, Michael Moore got an early start to his summer tanning at Malibu, California’s relaxed Zuma Beach. Home to a slew of MLO snobs, wayward Mexicans and Pepperdine students, the mix of Zuma Beach is usually relaxed and calm. This all changed, however, when there was a beaching that sent locals into panic and bewildered, shocked fits of laughs and tears.
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Author: Ashleigh Zettesberg
Well-traveled and a lover of life, Ashleigh is a Fashion and Lifestyle editor for ChristWire Global.
2:42 pm
Wow, that man is HUGE!
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10:25 pm
Like many liberals, Moore lacks self-control and the ability to delay gratification. This is why so many liberals are overweight and suffer from other ailments indicating a lack of self control such as alcoholism, drug addiction, sex addiction and compulsive masturbation.
It is scientific fact that conservative Christians are less obese and are truly beautiful, both inside and out? Why, we don’t consume in excess.
The fuuny thing is that fat liberal slobs like Moore actually claim to care about the suffering of the poor and needy. They blame poverty on capitalism, when the reality is that poverty is caused by over-consumption by fat liberal slobs like Moore. Since, Moore cares so much about poverty, we should air drop him over Somalia’s famine zone and see how long he lasts.
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10:42 pm
You hit the booze as hard as August does, don’t you?
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10:49 pm
Typical leftist. When you can’t refute a rational, ironclad argument, you resort to childish insults and name calling. I will pray for you tonight, in hopes that you might find wisdom and receive the Lord into your heart.
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9:06 pm
Ironclad? There are holes in your rant that are big enough for me to drive a truck through, and no matter how many facts are thrown in your face, you remain ignorant and stupid.
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4:08 am
Reverend, what proof do you have he’s a liberalist? A person is overweight because of either food, or diabetes (I think?).
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4:09 am
Ignore that, I forgot my research.
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3:03 pm
You want rational arguments here… there are as many fat slobs in congress that are republican. Also some ‘liberals’ like southern democrats are more religious and conservative than many northern republicans. If you add the fact that there is no face shot I doubt that this is Michael Moore and this article is B.S. This is the least christian site I’ve ever seen, first of all stop spewing hate at people because the Bible tells you to turn the other cheek and acknowledged that God is the only judge yet everyone is condemning everyone. Right on the sidebar is an article bashing homosexuals… well even IF it is a sin it’s not your problem. You can just be a good christian and pray for them.
Also I’d be surprised is more than 5% of the people on this site know what book that comes from. Well it’s Leviticus, look it up. He also condemns incest, bestiality, and a lot of other things. Well those were laws for thousands of years ago, and the Hebrew tribe was small and needed to reproduce. What to all those have in common besides being, well they are wrong but besides that? There is no offspring or the offspring is deformed. I’m not supporting it but I’m just saying a book with stuff written thousands of years ago by MAN and compiled by MAN shouldn’t have much bearing on society today besides the life lessons like love thy neighbor, be a good person, generous, help the poor, etc. Also there’s something in this country called separation of church and state so I don’t think this is an issue for the government to handle..
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10:51 pm
Ironclad? You made a statement that you claimed to be a fact and didn’t bother backing it up. In fact, not only have you fools never used proper sources, but many times, you just attack the person themselves as well. Jeb the Moron has done it several times, August has never properly backed his claims up once, and Pedobillings makes stupid claims and dismisses arguments without reading them, and that’s the tip of the iceberg.
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11:08 pm
Can you deny that Michael Moore is King of all hypocrites for professing on one hand to care about the suffering of the poor and needy, while OTOH he eats more in one day than the entire nation of Somalia does in one year? Can you deny that over consumption of food by fat ugly pigs like Moore is the real problem causing poverty, and not capitalism?
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11:20 pm
“Can you deny that Michael Moore is King of all hypocrites for professing on one hand to care about the suffering of the poor and needy, while OTOH he eats more in one day than the entire nation of Somalia does in one year?”
You do the exact same damn thing, and to use Moore as the ‘liberal standard’ is nothing short of ignorant on your end.
“Can you deny that over consumption of food by fat ugly pigs like Moore is the real problem causing poverty, and not capitalism?”
Yeah, yeah I can. The two are unrelated. Just because you can eat doesn’t mean you’re in poverty, it’s a lack of jobs and taxes out the ass that create poverty. If you’re able to overeat on such a scale, there’s a VERY good chance you are NOT in poverty.
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5:07 am
“Just because you can eat doesn’t mean you’re in poverty…… If you’re able to overeat on such a scale, there’s a VERY good chance you are NOT in poverty.”
You completely misunderstood what Cletus wrote. He was not trying to say that Michael Moore was in poverty, in fact he can obviously afford to eat anything he likes, and he does.
If every rich person ate as much as Michael Moore does, there would be even more widespread famine throughout the world. There simply aren’t enough resources to maintain all these disgustingly obese people.
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5:14 pm
They can buy it though, can’t they? And what matters more is being able to buy the resources, right? That’s why Third World countries do about as badly as they do: they lack the ability to give funds to the people.
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9:04 pm
What has been seen cannot be unseen…
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8:57 pm
Do we have any information on the girls in the photo? Were they ok?
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5:40 pm
I was just wondering… This is a ‘christian’ website for people of this faith to discuss being christan and what not… So why the hell is there a story about a man’s weight? Who cares it’s his body and he isnt’t hurting anyone but maybe hiself but honestly who gives a damn?
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6:16 pm
They are Christian. Christians are known for hating and not loving. Any Christian that tries telling me otherwise I just look at most of the articles.
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7:49 pm
“Christians are known for hating and not loving.”
ChrisTwire moderators, please ban this poster, thanks!
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9:05 pm
Because I’m right? Too bad. The truth hurts.
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6:50 pm
Because Gluttony is a sin this man is going to hell.
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7:23 pm
You partake in quite a few sins yourself, you heathen.
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8:02 pm
God forgives my sins.
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8:05 pm
And what makes you think God won’t forgive Moore, as well as why you think God would forgive a monster like you who breaks His laws all the time?
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9:01 pm
Moore is a false Christian and he hates America, everyone who hates God’s nation burns forever in hell.
Your opinion of me is irrelevant, all that matters is that according to God (and his holy word the Bible) i am a good person.
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9:04 pm
So God says that people who want to kill, murder, rape, destroy, and pillage are good people? Because that’s largely what a lot of ‘good’ people end up doing in the bible. There’s also the fact that Moore is doing what he thinks is best for America, but rather than push his agenda with religion, he tries to use various facts to get people to join his cause. He doesn’t go ‘God said so’ like you; even if he fails, he’s STILL a better person and reporter than all of you cretins.
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7:29 pm
This article didn’t really make a point it was just calling some dude fat… It had no purpose.
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7:48 pm
“It had no purpose.”
This succient phrase neatly sums up just about every single one of your posts.
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7:51 pm
Does anything you ever say have a purpose?
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7:59 pm
*sigh* Do you do anything but antagonize, LN? I encourage you to submit an article to the website so we can see if there’s anything inside your noggin other than the bigoted hatred you routinely display towards people of faith. If the article is any good, I might once again include you in my bi-hourly prayers. Feel free to ask me for any fun topics to write about if you can’t think of anything on your own (highly likely)!
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8:16 pm
My purpose in commenting was stating a fact, something it seems you Christwire folks can’t do. And L.N. was antagonizing? You just told me my comments had no purpose and when he said you didnt yourself all the sudden it’s antagonizing? Hypocritical much?
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8:24 pm
Young lady, I admire your spunk! It’s refreshing to actually agree with a liberal on something. It may not seem like much, but acknowledging LN’s antagonistic posts is a great starting point! Bless!
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8:27 pm
You didn’t bother reading her comment, did you? You’re too stupid to read, I knew it.
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8:34 pm
Perhaps your first article could be about any common ground that atheists and Christians share! Like how both parties enjoy a pleasant Sunday drive in our weekend cars or our mutual love of Haribo® Gummi Bears or something. I’ll leave it up to you and see how far you can get!
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8:44 pm
Considering you can’t read comments, what are the odds of you being able to read articles, hm?
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8:52 pm
No surprise that you’re avoiding my suggestion. It’s real easy to sit back and lob bombs at the hard-hitting journalists around here but another thing to put your money where your mouth is, eh? Your bratty behavior may impress the baristas at your local coffee shop but you’re fooling no one around here, bud.
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8:55 pm
I didn’t avoid jack, I already explained that your inability to read would make any attempt at trying to find middle ground pointless and useless. And ‘hard hitting journalists’? You mean the rampant liars here who post up ‘articles’ that contain nothing but bullshit and hate?
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7:49 pm
Two cheeseburger’s? Seriously? Admitted once? Incredible! He really ate two cheeseburgers? I am surprised he is still alive! People eat two cheeseburgers all the time.
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8:46 pm
Claire,
I see nothing wrong with that picture. Fanny packs filled with hiking supplies always add a few pounds. If you cinch a sweatshirt with a belt, well a bulge here and there is to be expected.
He has the look of a wrestler or athletic man. Perfectly normal. I don’t see any neck rolls of fat on the back of his neck. If we did, that might support your claims – but it isn’t there.
Men today prancing around in those fashion magazines you like so much look dirty and unwashed. There are weird dimples and such that one really doesn’t see on a real man.
Kind regards,
BB
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4:56 pm
So that liberal show called Girls Gone Wild, is that for children or girls this age?
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5:12 pm
“If I don’t like it, it must be liberal”
Is that the kind of thinking you try to apply? Girls Gone Wild is softcore porn, it’s political affiliations are neither liberal nor conservative.
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5:30 pm
Liberals are pro-sexual freedoms. Conservatives are not. This is a show about sexual freedoms. So this is a liberal show.
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5:35 pm
Fair enough logic, I suppose.
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5:39 pm
Would you like to play some MSN hearts network?
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5:42 pm
Nah, not really a cards person.
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6:56 pm
You spend far too much time examining by backside. It’s definitely creepy there little girl!
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12:55 pm
Claire is so superficial. Billings has the build of an athlete living out his golden years. Catty Claire apparently wants a man who is a string bean and comfortably wearing size zero leggings. Why don’t you want a real man, Catty Claire?
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