• Why Fan Fiction is Possibly The Most Lethal Threat To Your Heterosexuality

    April 4, 2012 1:59 am 115 comments
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  • While we moral Christians are off at Church, at work, at school or on Christwire, there is a dirty subculture lurking on the internet. We all know of the threats of Tumblr, Reddit, Facebook and Myspace on our youth, but there is something even more sinister than the threats of coming across explicit gay porn or atheism on any of the above sites. We all read books, everything from Left Behind to the Bible. We all watch television, everything from Bill O’Reilly to Glenn Beck. We all watch movies as long as they are Christian-appropriate. But we normal people don’t view these forms of media the way a vile growing group of heathens on the internet do. Unfortunately, this group is growing, and you may be its next victim.


    Fan fiction is a radical new form of interpreting media. Especially in “fandoms” for shows like Doctor Who, GLEE, My Little Pony, Homestruck, Sherlock, and for bands like One Direction, My Chemical Romance and Black Veal Brides, these erotic pieces of propaganda are introducing a new wave of homosexuality. Young girls, usually between the ages of 7 and 16, are beginning to take influence from the media they watch and love. Unfortunately, this love in inappropriately manifested in the forms of “shipping”, a racy method of trying to enact homogay sodomy between heterosexuals; “fan videos”, manipulated footage designed to deceive viewers into believing that two individuals are gay lovers; “fan art”, pornographic images rendered to give the illusion of sexual encounters between two people; and “fan fiction”, which encompasses all, complete with poor writing. As this form of “appreciating” works becomes increasingly popular, rates of homosexuality, atheism, sexual promiscuity and liberalism have never been higher. The arousal spread through the internet in the form of fan fiction is harmful to all.


    Barack Hussein Obama’s radical doctrine has opened up new sexual urges in young ladies and confused young gentlemen. These children were typically exposed at a young age to graphically sexual shows such as Gossip Girl, GLEE, Pretty Little Liars, Game of Thrones, Spongebob Squarepants and Teletubbies. This exposure to national level threats such as these has burnt a new hole in the brains of many youth. This hole is designed to manifest homosexual thoughts and communist desires, and is typically a result of liberal parenting. Thanks to this supermassive, ever growing black hole in your child’s mind, your family may be at risk of homosexuality, atheism or liberal political beliefs.

    Star Trek + Sodomy = The Satanic Agenda

    Fan fiction was introduced in the 1970s, an era of marijuana, disco and tight pants. This should not come as a surprise by anyone. The black market began releasing publications dedicated to pornographic smut about the Star Trek characters Captain Kirk ands Mr. Spock. Star Trek, notorious for its implantation of explicitly secular material in the impressionable minds of youth, contains one of the most homoerotic casts in history, from the Japanese gay sex symbol George Takei to the skimpily dressed Khan in the film “Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan”. Women were fascinated by the idea of intergalactic homosexual hookups, and took to spreading this as far and too as many people as possible. With the introduction of the internet, we saw a massive influx of fan fiction. From Dawson’s Creek to The Simpsons to Frasier, everything became more gay with the anal fluids of fan fiction washing over them.


    The most shocking trend in fan fiction these days is extending the fiction to reality. Youth who wish to stay current in a cynical and offensive way have begun writing homosexual fan fiction about real people. From politics to sports to music, obnoxious heathens are including real heterosexuals in their dirty erotic fantasies. These people consider themselves extremely clever, in the exact same smug way as liberals like John Stewart and Bill Maher. As well, this reflects how mainstream pornography and kinky sexual acts have become, in part due to the accessibility of graphic pornography, in part due to the sexual revolution, in part due to feminism. All of these have been proven to be extremely hostile towards Christians.

    Michelangelo: The Very First Fan Fiction Writer

    American writing has ventured off path from the days of The Bible and Ernest Hemingway. The Bible did not contain the explicit powerbottoming seen in fan fiction, but rather news reports of victories of good over evil, and dangerous sodomites like Michelangelo who attempted to sexualize it were shunned by the Church and lived in the shadows, too ashamed to face their indignity. We must return to a time when this was not commonplace and morality and respect were devoted to media unless the media is liberally biased. We must reclaim America from the clutches of fan fiction, before it is too late.

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    About The Author
    Christopher Christenson Republican, American, Christian, Man, Carnivore, White, Hero, Genius, Brave. All words that adequately describe Christopher Christenson. At the ripe young age of 28, Christopher has been writing for Christwire for quite a while, when he isn't warding off the North Koreans from attacking or mentoring youth at his church. Because of his young age, he is able to connect with the young people whilst still charming our beloved elderly. Christopher is fascinated by the grotesque trends among youth and will stop at nothing to investigate. You can contact him on his website.

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