Kate Upton Bikini Dances to Rej3ctz’s ‘Cat Daddy’ [Video], Satan’s New ‘Catstep’ Music
Satan has a new form of music he wants to whisper into your child’s ears. It is called ‘Catsep’, a hissing, trippier version of the Skrillex created genre called dubstep.
This music is meant exclusively for teenage women who are just starting college. As seen in the image up above, Kate Upton is revealing herself and standing next to a nearly 50-year-old Chomo Hipster. You can tell by the plaids in his shirt, the European balding haircut and thick glasses, that behind that smug grin and handlebar stache is a mind who plans to twiddlewink your college daughter and send her home with a big belly of secret shame.
Look at how Kate Upton is already holding her belly. I wonder what’s embedded in there? Maybe a little hipster sauce?
The way Catstep works is pretty simple. It first lures women with something they cannot resist: the purrs of a kitten. A kitten is Satanic in many ways, one of the ways being that it uses inherit cuteness to gain access to a woman’s heart and trust. For every one cat, 60 cases of ringworm will be reported. Ringworm is simply a cat STI that’s passed on when a woman lets a cat do naughty things to them.
Once hearing a bit of the hissing beats and rapper’s words, the woman is put into a trance and can be made to do pregnancy dances. We see this in the following shock video that was posted on YouTube.
Brother August first discovered this horrendous attrocity and in this video you’ll weep as Kate Upton club-dances to The Rej3ctz’s song “Cat Daddy” in nothing but a skimpy red bikini. The dancing, like any true club, shows off lots of jiggling and temptations, forcing Upton at the end of her performance, to make sure her milksacs didn’t pop out.
At the end of the song, her inner-spirit is able to break her trance and she yells “That’s it, that’s all you guys need.” We’re sure they just held her there and exposed the 19-year-old to more of the music, loosened her morals and soon she will probably have a Jessica Simpson sized baby bump.
Kate Upton was once a Christian Model who posed in Christian female modeling showcase, Sports Illustrated. The magazine regularly features chaste women showing off their hard earned curves as proof of what awaits men of morality. Look at what catstep ‘Cat Daddy’ dance has done to her.
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Adam Nelson
12:00 pm
I guess to a hipster, filming a young lady who’s suffering from a grand mal seizure is some kind of high art.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
12:01 pm
After this, no man will want her.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
3
5:07 pm
She is super hot. Every man will want her as I am sure a lot of the ladies do as well.
Praise or Condemn:
4 
0
5:56 pm
Riiggghhhttt
Praise or Condemn:
1 
1
12:30 pm
I bet her womanhood spells like catnip now.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
2
12:40 pm
“I bet her womanhood spells like catnip now.”
How does something ‘spell’ like catnip? I take it you meant ‘smell’?
Praise or Condemn:
1 
1
3:43 pm
What a harlot!
Praise or Condemn:
1 
4
11:12 pm
I was just about to say what a whorelot. Praise jesus for decent young girls such as yourself.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
2
12:22 am
I don’t know man. E-A is showing too much skin. Better get the pitchforks and torches. There’s going to be a stoning tonight!
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
12:23 am
Praise!
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
11:29 pm
That house has severe water damage. Just look at those walls behind that pregnant dancing girl. Awful, that must be in inner city Detroit. We should report this as a “slumlord” violation.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
1
11:45 am
Bruce, why do you lie? Why do you hate Jesus?
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
10:55 pm
What did I lie about? That house clearly has water damage, are you blind as well as stupid? That would explain why you never read anything here.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
11:12 pm
You’re calling someone pregnant because you’re trying to allude that she’s fat. Clearly you hate Jesus and women if you’re going to lie.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
11:17 pm
No L.N., if you read the actual article, it clearly says that she was impregnated by that old hipster.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
1
11:37 pm
She was not impregnated by anyone, Adam is a complete idiot who doesn’t know up from down.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
12:23 am
YOu need to say some prayers son, for your filthy language. She is a devilwhore from Detroit.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
1
6:45 pm
Fuck you I live in detroit and my house is nice.
P.S. Its called wallpaper.
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
12:21 am
This is disgusting. I pray for her and her family. Can you imagine what her father thinks? My son apparently is attracted to her and even after taking away his Danica whorepatrick posters he still is worshipping sinful women such as her. She looks like a sleazy swedish prostitute,
Praise or Condemn:
0 
1
3:18 pm
And thus you tell the world your son has good taste.
Praise or Condemn:
1 
0
8:02 am
NERD
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0
11:52 pm
you wish you could have a sweet comment like 5468894942 this!
Praise or Condemn:
0 
0