Coldplay plans satanic album.
England’s evil band, Coldplay, are planning more cruel satanism on their next release “Let’s Kick Jesus Really Hard.” Chris Martin, frontman for Coldplay, says, “It’s a concept album, really. About Jesus. How we don’t like him and want to kick him.” The album is planned to be filled with soaring inspiration piano ballads about kicking Jesus.
The band has long used their emotional charm to win people over to Satan. Their use of strings, piano, and whiny vocals are used to terrify children and emotionally manipulate middle-aged women into thinking that they are a decent band. Lyrics from the new album include:
“I walked across the sea
Together you and me
We fell in love and drowned
We smiled and we frown
But mostly we kicked Jesus.”
No sensible parent would allow such garbage on the airwaves and the pop charts! Save our children from this evil!
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Barnald Mertog
I luv Jesus.
5:20 pm
Barnald Mertog
the crap continues
there is no album planed for release called
“Let’s Kick Jesus Really Hard.”
any Coldplay album or single ever released HAS SOLD MORE COPIES THAN THE CRAPWIRE HANDBOOK EVER WILL
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5:37 pm
well fuck me gently the only references i could find for coldplay “Let’s Kick Jesus Really Hard.” on google
are two references to christwire nothing else on the Entire internet
NOTHING ANYWHERE ELSE…….AM I SURPRISED HELL NO THIS WAS EXPECTED
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8:58 pm
good on you!…the guy who wrote this Barnald or whatevs) is a bloody lunatic :/
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6:07 am
Well, I didn’t expect anything more out of Christwire. Coldplay is awesome, fuck you, goodbye.
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3:33 pm
*kicks jesus*
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