Hurricane Sandy Is A Result of Homosexuality; Proof That Obama’s Time Is Up.
by Mark E. Figs
This man, on his way to a Gay Negroes for Obama rally, smiled at our photographers and said “Obama’s giving me a phone.”
The days of President Homeboy are numbered. With hurricane Sandy’s path of destruction came the clear-cut sign from God that he is tired of our immoral, homosex-abetting ways and that a great change is coming in a few days.
I’m not much of a literature man — the Bible and Jack London novels are all I really need, but I’ll be darned if this hurricane didn’t serve as a foreshadowing of the greater tragedies that are to occur if we allow our “Ghetto Fab” commander-in-chief continue to destroy the godly principles on which this country was built!
This couldn’t have happened at a better time. A week before the election and the sin capital of the world, the same lusty, whore-mongering place of homosexual sodomy, NEW YORK CITY is struck by a devastating hurricane? A page right out of God’s screenwriting handbook. A scene meant to reflect his extreme displeasure with our lax liberal lifestyle. A scene written by a master director that helps show us the error of our ways; to eliminate the black (literally and figuratively) from our hearts.
If you hearken back to the days of Noah, you realize that our Lord promised not to destroy mankind with a flood ever again. But he can dang sure warn us!
The facts are staring us in the face. We’ve become too comfortable, too comfortable in sin. We allow this foreign God-hating backworld Muslim impregnate our constitutional values with Sharia law and other Islamic sorcery and sit idly by.
We let the gay homosexuals prance around in the streets, kissing each other and “docking” onto one another’s penises and vulva, all the while passing out dangerous marijuana to other youths so that they might become addicted to this horrible drug and begin to experiment sexually with penises and exhibit same-sex attraction.
We let the blacks sit around and sap our Federal reserve monies to put rims on their cars and support their numerous ill-behaved children. We brought this upon ourselves. Our reluctance to stand up and say “I BELIEVE IN GOD AND WILL HONOR HIS WILL” has pumped this poison through the heart of our glorious America.
So, now that God has made it clear that it’s time for the Muslim to go back to his foreign-dwelling place and take Al-Qaeda with him, who will you vote for? Keep in mind that this is one of the most important decisions of our lifetime. A chance to right the wrongs that President Homeboy has made and done to our economy, social landscape and American way of life.
I will stand tall, like I did in New York on Monday and scream to the skies, “I AM A WARRIOR. I WILL LET GOD COME INSIDE OF ME. I WILL FEEL HIM FILL ME UP, AND SWALLOW HIS TRUTHS.” Let God’s love wash over you. Let his gentle hands bathe you in the righteous waters of salvation.
Sandy was a sign that the days of welfare-abusing black homosexual Muslims are coming to an end. We’re destined for beautiful things, as per God’s plan and come November 6th, that plan will be set in motion.
Mark E. Figs is an award winning cook and author of over several episodes of “BibleMan” including the Emmy-winning episode, “BibleMan Smells A Rape.”
- Sinful
- Suspicious
- Scared
- Sad
- Amused
- Laughing Out Loud
Author: Mark E. Figs
Mark is an award-winning children's author, and Christian Conspiracy Theorist can be found on Facebook and Twitter -- (Mark E. Figs)
2:15 am
Oh now you made BibleMan wow you keep changing that almost like you are just pulling it out your ass every time you post. oh wait….
You and figgings need to get together more and try to post about the same thing.
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10:50 am
I never claimed to make Bibleman but I was a writer for it. Please learn English
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1:20 pm
you know it would be a sign of god but not the entireity of th eastern seaboard needed to come with it when they dint even have that law so if he was planning on taking the entirety of the eastern seaboard with him then good job if he was planning on only new york your god dida horrible f**king job
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3:59 am
I believe that Deacon Figs is correct. The fact that the perfect storm targeted the east village is proof that the wrath of God is upon the most shamelessly liberal fornicators that this nation can produce,
Deacon Figs, my dear friend in Christ has a unique gift of explaining biblical truth and prophecy in clear understandable language that we can process and use to become closer to God.
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3:45 pm
I think you mean fags now go get a shave and a hair cut hippie.
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7:51 am
“I think you mean fags”
You are extremely homophobic, KBLME. I would expect better from a European.
Unless, of course, you are one of those poor, backward barbarians from the former Soviet bloc. Are you a Polish football hooligan or a Serbian war criminal or something?
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12:20 pm
So someone who uses the word ‘fag’ once is extremely homophobic, but someone who talks about killing homosexuals is an upstanding citizen?
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1:59 am
Way to mischaracterise both ends of your stupid false dichotomy, LN.
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8:13 pm
low blow anytime a gay man wants to her fag is during and i mean ONLY DURING a dominate sex thats it thats it nowhere else
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8:43 pm
no he did a bad job if he planned that then he did a bad job it hit the entire
EASTERN SEABOARD meaning he didnt hit the east village he hit the east coast
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7:53 am
Jesse, you are not keeping up with the news.
Sophisticated theologians have already explained all of this:
http://whyevolutionistrue.wordpress.com/2012/11/01/theologians-explains-the-suffering-caused-by-hurricane-sandy/
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11:47 pm
so your God is a Murderer now ?
Your God is also a heartless bastard with No Emotion
or maybe emotion is for Gay and sissy and your ( I clearly said YOUR ) god is just another magalomaniac entity taht want tod estroy the entire planet
and we are supposed to be afraid of satan when he seems less a asshole than this megalomaniac God they preach
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7:54 am
” Gay and sissy”
Why so homophobic, Frenchy?
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8:15 pm
it tis not be homophobic but homosexual
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8:57 am
I wonder why you never ask such a question one of the christwire “journalists”….
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8:25 am
Well this may be just be the most radical, ignorant article i’ve ever read. If you think its so wrong for two beings to love each other and to kiss each other in public, then consider yourself prude and feel this way towards all couples rather than just same-sex couples.
You’re what people consider scum, not homosexuals nor coloured people.
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8:03 pm
Amen.
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7:56 am
Psst! Anon! You’re not supposed to say “coloured people” any more. It’s quite racist, actually. Try “African-American” or similar.
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11:32 am
Seriously what is wrong with you people? This is a disgusting and completely ridiculous article. You people make me sick. And for the record shouting “I am a warrior. i will let God come inside of me. I will feel him fill me up, and swallow his truths.” Is possible the gayest thing I’ve ever read. Sound to me like you want to god to sodomise you and drink his semen
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10:32 pm
Is it at all possible for liberals to look at anything without putting a homogay twist on it? Comments like those from Brooker Michael above are proof that PBS needs to be shut down.
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10:58 pm
This coming from the Pig that thinks ‘on fire’ is gay-sounding.
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11:50 pm
so you wnat to remove any channel now what about Freedom of press oh wiat you never believed in Freedom
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11:43 am
Do you really blame homosexuals, for every hurricane, which appears every year?
They have nothing to do with it…. idiot.
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12:28 pm
“I AM A WARRIOR. I WILL LET GOD COME INSIDE OF ME. I WILL FEEL HIM FILL ME UP, AND SWALLOW HIS TRUTHS”
You will feel what you will swallow what the what?!
I mean, how hard can it be? The truth…
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12:34 pm
As for the man in that pic, he accepts God´s wrath with a smile and does the only reasonable thing, get so drunk he won´t care to blame anyone for this.
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1:31 pm
if he is drinking vodka he wont even remember that he is ina hurricane
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3:56 pm
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8:02 pm
Everyone just needs to calm down. You don’t have the right to turn your opinions into domestic policy. However much I want to surgically remove the sticks from your asses, I don’t, because I understand that government should not infringe on our social rights. By denying homosexuals the right to marry, some Christians effectively undermine the right to freedom of religion by forcing us to conform to your Christian values. We are the land of the free and that includes gays. It doesn’t just mean that you have your rights, it means that gays have theirs, whether or not you agree with them. And not all gays are the promiscuous stereotype you paint them to be. Have you never heard of the good Samaritan? Because even if you don’t think that gays are good, you should accept and love them, not berate them. Although I sound angry, know that I, like you, am a Christian, and love all people. Don’t worry, God will forgive you for your hatred come judgement day.
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12:30 am
So did you all see the new report jesus was on drug’s the whole time.
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5:30 pm
lmfaooooo are you fukcing kidding me?
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12:53 am
God Bless Christwire! The truth on this website make the angels song praise into God! New York, an enormous cesspool of satanism, prostitution and let us not forget the gay factory machine Broadway, has been cleansed by God! His holy waters have driven out the filth of the city, let only the righteous walk it’s saintly streets! The satanic liberal agenda serves to attribute “disasters” like these to science and therefore the devil, but let there be no mistake, it was an act of providence so that we, the American People, may see his power. The atheist-democrat-prostitute-satanic grip that has squeezed the LIFE from America is loosened by the Lord! Obama has no power any longer! Let us follow this command, and clear the vile filth from this country! Drive out the gays and Muslims and Hindu-demon worshipped, the femmenazi whores and liberal commies! Make America what it was meant to be! CHRISTIAN!!!
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3:22 pm
Wow. How absolutely pathetic. It seems to me as if the PROTESTANT denominations are more hateful that the CATHOLIC denominations. At least the Pope doesn’t say to kill gay people. I’m 14 and I’m a gay boy, and it took me two years to reconcile my faith with my religion. (I’m Catholic) none the less, I do have some issues with the Catholic church. For Protestants to be call Catholics hateful, is pretty hypocritical considering the fact that these Protestants hate Catholics themselves. The God I believe in is not a hateful God but a loving and just God. As much as you will refute this claim, (I know how you “Christians” operate) the bible was written 100% by God. I believe that some parts of Leviticus, and Corinthians, and Romas as well as other books, are not inspired by God. You “Christians” certainly do not act Christ-like. The only reason homosexualiy was illegal and punishable by death in Ancient Israel was because the people if Caanan were always in battle with each other. The tribe needed as many producing parents and as many warriors as they could get. Obviously, gays an lesbians could not produce children. Nearly all of the disciples of Jesus turned their backs on his teachings, and believes the exact opposite of what Jesus taught.
I don’t know what bible you are reading but. I hope before you die you will realize the error of your ways. God bless you…. Perhaps there still is help for you.
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3:24 pm
Excuse me, written 100% by man
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11:11 pm
Is this guy serious?
I have yet to read an article on here that doesn’t use the word “homogay”.
At least increase your goddamn vocabulary before insulting everybody who has different views than you. Jesus.
I consider myself christian, but this whole website just makes christians as a whole look bad…
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4:41 pm
This is ridiculous. How can you blame a natural, scientifically explainable occurrence on gays and African Americans?
Obama is doing his best to clean up after the mess left by George Bush.
I have spent several hours reading some of the articles on this site, and they are some of the most offensive and ignorant that I have read in my life.
This website helped to remind me why I am proud to be educated and a Canadian. Any country which could have such a large population with extreme, uninformed views like the ones presented on this site is definitely not for me.
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1:53 pm
I agree… With disgusted comments. It’s very humbling knowing that I am more intelligent that a significant percentage of a developed nation lololololol
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6:52 pm
Someone please take away this old man computer privileges at the nursing home. He is making a fool of himself.
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7:46 pm
Ever eat pork? Shellfish? Milk after meat? Do you keep kosher? God condemns all those things but you fall silent because you are are sinful as the rest. You only condemn homosexuals because of the hatred inside of you. G-d is love. There is proof to that. He sent Jesus. Hate is Satan’s tool.
So I say to you. Get G-d in you heart if you wish to call yourself a Christian sir.
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